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Catharsis: My Chaturbate Story; A Guide to Webcamming For Men (May help women to!)

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Catharsis: My Chaturbate Story; A Guide to Webcamming for Men
Warning: This is not a quick read. Sorry if it's block of text, I tried to format it reasonably.

Authors note: I have been meaning to do this for a long time. I consider this a catharsis; a form of mental release considering I keep my webcam 'career' so secret. I just want to share my story with people that have any sort of sense of the same journey and hear responses. Any responses. Questions. Anything I want to help, want to share and I want to learn. If anything, I hope my journey serves as a guide for how others can do the same thing. Maybe they to are panicking that their life is fucking up and need a guide.


I guess we begin at the beginning.

In the summer of 2014 I was a handsome, young 21 year old man (Oh c'mon I have to flatter myself) content with life and getting ready for his masters degree. Six foot three, slim but muscular, working full time over the summer to fuel university spendings and very happy with a gorgeous girlfriend and decent family.

Sounds like an intelligent guy, right? Masters degree, flashy stuff. Well this genius decided to blow £1000 he could not afford chasing his gambling winnings. I'd won £600 betting and thought I was the man. I then lost not only the £600 winnings but also £1000 on top of that. Woops. I needed £700 to help pay towards six months rent for student housing due to only being able to secure one guarantor and...I no longer had £700...shiiiiit.

If I didn't have this money I wouldn't be able to go to university, basically. What to do...

Get a job?
Sadly I was working full-time, and overtime already in my summer job. Fuck.

Confess?
If worst came to worst, I could have confessed all and my parents would have sorted me out, it's true. They're reliable financially, if nothing else. But I did not want that shame. I had enough shame admitting to myself I had a gambling problem and took it upon myself to find a solution.

Other.
I took responsibility for my actions and wanted to correct it. I considered another job, but eurgh, honestly 40 hours plus me trying to dedicate myself to the gym was exhausting. So up pops Google, naturally.

I searched for "How to make money fast". Wow. That's a new low in itself! I'd love to know how many simpletons had searched that before me in an effort to find an easy way in life.

Regardless, forums popped up a ton of suggestions with 'get rich quick' schemes taking the priority alongside stock markets, CASH FOR GOLD, gambling (Erm, I'm a mentally destroyed apparent addict already thanks) and the troll posters who just smugly go into an essay saying to "get a job and pay taxes like the rest of us." You gotta love prick forum surfers that just have to be a twat. Luckily there's none on this forum........ ;)

Anyway, someone suggested webcamming and went into a good bit of detail about how it's a viable option for guys and girls. I found this hard to believe.

My only experience of 'camming' was the LiveJasmin ads that popped up when I watched porn. I think when I was like 15 I ventured onto there and was amazed by the live porn simulation feeling. I think those ads were pre-recorded but, damn, I was a horny teenager and they were great! I remember even cheekily commenting something to see if the model reacted. I wonder if this is how the greys feel on CB...?

So yeah, I researched further and stumbled upon a few sites. Most had confusing layouts and frankly impossible verification with the need for a ton of pictures or something for profile and satisfaction ratings or some shit but I managed to find Chaturbate and well...that changed my life.

Now this forum post is gonna sound like a fucking sponsored post for CB cos I love it so much but I don't care. They're not perfect, they've banned me twice and there's a post on here not long ago with me having a rant.

But, genuinely, to all the CB haters on this forum that are even considering commenting negativity on them, fuck off. You are not helpful. It's a great, very busy platform and has given me a ridiculous cheat code to life. And options are good, so deal with it.

I found Chaturbate very easy to navigate, very easy to sign up, very easy to verify and very easy to get banned. Wait what. Ignore that last bit ;) Honestly though, my profile was pimping enough after not too long. It just offered a HTML bio I threw up in a few seconds and one Saturday afternoon I had off work, I took the plunge. I had a summer to make £700 somehow and by God, let's fucking dance. Or...wank. Oh dear.

I need to highlight how fucking terrifying the first time is to broadcast. I really hope I'm not alone in this. I remember it so vividly. I was living at my parents and they were doing kinda gardening/housework sorta stuff so I shut my blinds, shut my door and creeped online. I pressed 'broadcast now', found a decent position and lighting and went live. Users (1) it said. That user was me. Then it flicked, 30 seconds or so later. Users (2). Me and +1 anonymous user.

I blushed. I literally blushed crimson red and my heart started racing. Someone was watching me right now, sat on my bed. That was a very surreal moment for me and will remain with me as part of my history forever. Now it's just a plastic camera to me, I do not envisage 200-300 men wanking over me. Yum. But back then, in that moment, all I could think was...this person can see me.

Eventually chat started building up, people said hello and it was nice to meet me, welcome to the site. It was obvious I was new. They guided me through a few things, goals and such. It was all very warm and genuine. I remember the names of my first batch of tippers and when they pop in my room now from time to time it is funny because I remember them but they do not remember ever seeing me on the site before. Charming!

I made 330 tokens (£12ish) on my first session. It was a lot to take in, I didn't have any goals but I managed to show my dick, ass, flex, that sort of thing cos people asked. Some just thought I was sweet and new so tipped for that. I got bored eventually, realised I needed to do more research and logged off. $16.50, I'll always remember it. Right. £688 to go.

The next day I set a simple 500 tokens for cum show goal.

I laugh at this now, but it was a step up. I eased in more, still ridiculously shy and aware of my parents in the house. I showed bits, asshole this time as well which was WEIRD, It took about 2-3 hours to reach the goal and I came, on camera. Full face and body in view. Silly boy. People tipped me more after I came, without needing to which was lovely. That doesn't happen often so be thankful.

$38...£665 to go. It seemed possible now. I should also mention I was only typing during these early shows. I didn't have the balls/empty house to talk on a microphone really. Eventually I did, on the night time shows when my parents were hopefully sleeping.

The next day, I did the same structure twice. Once in the afternoon and once in the evening. Again, we met the goals and people tipped afterwards! I thought this was amazing but actually they probably felt bad cos I had basically made nothing for a practically free show. Do not sell yourself short, future cammers. Research and build your goals up to what you deserve.

Gradually I learnt more and more, I had a nice moderator who would advise me and kept conversations flowing well. I 'expanded' to a 1000 tokens for cum show goal with mini goals every 200, flash dick, ass, asshole, pushups, foreskin, that sort of stuff. The shows were painfully slow and generally relied on generous 'purple' tippers to push them to the goal, out of sympathy more than anything.

Eventually the moderator became less nice, started only turning up when the cum show began and it became clear he was not looking out for me but 'the power game' for himself. He was weird. Get used to that. Viewers will use and abuse you, you will make mistakes and learn. I have had the most bizarre experiences. More on that later...

I stuck with that format for my few weeks on the site. It worked. I got my money. See below:

Date Tokens Payout
May 12, 2014 330 $16.50
May 13, 2014 776 $38.80
May 14, 2014 1522 $76.10
May 15, 2014 698 $34.90
May 16, 2014 1800 $90.00
May 17, 2014 3166 $158.30
May 18, 2014 1136 $56.80
May 19, 2014 1125 $56.25
May 20, 2014 4075 $203.75
May 21, 2014 200 $10.00
May 22, 2014 1190 $59.50
May 23, 2014 1401 $70.05
May 24, 2014 85 $4.25
May 25, 2014 1000 $50.00
May 26, 2014 1551 $77.55
May 27, 2014 1175 $58.75
May 29, 2014 996 $49.80
May 30, 2014 1 50 $7.50
June 1, 2014 1050 $52.50
Aug. 24, 2014 2010 $100.50
Sept. 6, 2014 832 $41.60
Total 26268 $1313.40
Check out May 20th...some guy just came in and threw tokens at me for 10 minutes. It was fucking bizarre. I was so excited haha, I couldn't believe my luck. It pushed me a lot closer to my goals. Some of these were 2 a day sessions, by the way, hence the 2000+ days.

As soon as I had reached my goal, I stopped. I apparently popped back twice before I went to university, but I stopped. And didn't return for a year. Why? I didn't really enjoy it. £800 for 3 weeks work on top of my 40 hour job didn't seem worth the extra mile. Money was only so valuable back then when I just wanted to get to university!

Also, I had a girlfriend at the time and felt ashamed. I eventually told her how I got the money, and she cried in my arms, ashamed. Bless her. She couldn't believe I had done it. I told her I had stopped, it was over. But look, I went back twice. Maybe I was hooked from the start...

I proceeded to finish university (with no time to even think about camming), got my Masters, and was a broken man. I hated the career path I had chosen, it was the most work filled stressful year with a long distance relationship of two years that broke down whilst all this went on. Oh, younger version of me. You were a poor, broken soul. But you pledged to do things your way. Brave, really.

I decided to take a gap year, and return to my webcam venture. I was more muscular than before, and with full time unemployment to focus on it I felt I could turn it into something. And wow. I fucking did.

Forgive my financials, however for me this is SOLELY money based. Sure, I enjoy camming, but what if there was no money involved? Get fucked. What if there was some money involved? No. It has to be worth the time, the secrecy, the shame of telling a girl you are falling for how you really make money.

Date Tokens Payout
July 29, 2015 4425 $221.25
July 30, 2015 511 $25.55
July 31, 2015 1391 $69.55
Aug. 1, 2015 1005 $50.25
Aug. 2, 2015 544 $27.20
Aug. 4, 2015 1330 $66.50
Aug. 5, 2015 624 $31.20
Aug. 6, 2015 1343 $67.15
Aug. 7, 2015 3334 $166.70
Aug. 8, 2015 560 $28.00
Aug. 9, 2015 435 $21.75
Aug. 11, 2015 1795 $89.75
Aug. 12, 2015 2984 $149.20
Aug. 13, 2015 5703 $285.15
Aug. 14, 2015 4053 $202.65
Aug. 15, 2015 4197 $209.85
Aug. 18, 2015 2847 $142.35
Aug. 19, 2015 2977 $148.85
Aug. 20, 2015 4299 $214.95
Aug. 21, 2015 531 $26.55
Aug. 22, 2015 2826 $141.30
Aug. 23, 2015 2502 $125.10
Aug. 24, 2015 3566 $178.30
Aug. 25, 2015 2961 $148.05
Aug. 26, 2015 1506 $75.30
Aug. 28, 2015 3922 $196.10​

So I had gone from the aim of paying the rent to...well. I felt fucking rich. I had enough to start a personal training course that began in September (£3250, what a rip off!) and did that. It was 9-5 intensive with homework and studying so I cammed a lot less after September, but 3 months later I had done it. I had paid the rent, the course, and could go back to saving up for...something. WHO CARES. I WAS RICH. (I am sadly aware this is no level of rich).

So how the fuck did I start making all this money? :greedy:

I would love to say the answer was consistency, or improved confidence. Greater knowledge or better lighting. A shiny new camera and a cosy background to welcome viewers. I want to say that I had been around long enough to retain solid viewership and was a good looking, muscular guy that had some sort of apparent charisma to attract a gay following despite being 100% straight. But, whilst all that helps somewhat, a lot, even, it is not how I made more money. There is one, ONE simple answer to making money as a male cam model.

Ohmibod shows.

And it's all an act.

Now, I watched other guys on cam around July 2015. I saw some guy make 2000 tokens in 30 minutes doing an ohmibod show. 2000 TOKENS WHAT THE FUCK (About £80 for the non token savvy). For having a toy up his ass and getting tipped and reacting like he was being fucking volted with 2000 watts of token fuelled electricity. Outrageous.

This dude had the real deal, some big looking dildo that was legitimately penetrating his anal passage. Lovely. Fair play to the guy. But me...I'm straight. I know ass play is a thing but...it's not my thing. Not on myself. Nothing is going up there, no way.

So what did I do?

I bought an ohmibod. The girls one.

The Vibe 2.0 was the best £70 I have ever spent and surely ever will.

I took the vagina shaped toy and squeezed it gently a tiny bit into my asshole, clenched my buttcheeks and got it to stay in. It looked the part. The reality is there is NOTHING in my ass. Just...on it. I think. I had become an actor and made good money on it. I set the goal to whatever it was, 1500 tokens or something, and I acted my way to it.

Level 1 was 1-15 tokens (4p - 60p), Level 2 16-99 tokens (64p-£3.96) Level 3 100 - 499 tokens (£4-£19.96) Level 4 500 - 999 Tokens (£20 - £39.96) and Level 5 1000+ (£40 - ?). I had a different acted out reaction for each level. I would tense my legs, shake, grab my neck, roll my eyes, bite my lip, moan, grunt, pretend to be out of breathe...whatever.

Now this is not a big Ohmibod exposure. Some will say I am an idiot for saying I am an actor, for sure. Viewers probably stumble on these pages and could DANGEROUSLY EXPOSE my acting. But it's good money, fuck off. Not everyone fakes it, probably. Some women I've seen are fucking blatant. But who cares? Suspend belief and enjoy 'fucking' your favourite cam model. I am certain some are real, however. But I don't care. Mine isn't. I have a toy perched on my bummy and act away.

So to anyone reading this. To any straight guy thinking why are my shows slow or why don't they make enough. I have a structure that has worked for me.

Date Tokens Payout
June 16, 2017 8517 $425.85
June 17, 2017 6748 $337.40
June 18, 2017 3523 $176.15
June 19, 2017 4644 $232.20
June 20, 2017 3891 $194.55
June 21, 2017 7251 $362.55
June 22, 2017 7276 $363.80
June 23, 2017 5253 $262.65
June 24, 2017 50 $2.50
June 25, 2017 2949 $147.45
June 26, 2017 3740 $187.00
June 27, 2017 4280 $214.00
June 28, 2017 5571 $278.55
June 29, 2017 1861 $93.05
Total 65554 $3277.70​

£2540 in 2 weeks of working. Crazy.

(We don't talk about June 24th okay...it's not always big money)

I have three portions of my show.

Portion 1:
Multi-goal - Purpose is to build up viewers, chat, take private shows, reach goals slowly.
Goal 1 - Naked at 100 tokens, Request is 25
Goal 2 - Joggers Off at 100 tokens, Request is 25 (I sell the fact they will get to see sexy boxers)
Goal 3 - Naked at 100 tokens, Request is 25
Goal 4 - Foreskin/Ass/Balls Close-ups at 100 tokens, Request is 25
Goal 5 - Ohmibod Show Begins at 100 tokens, Request is 25


500 tokens banked, takes about an hour. (£20)

Portion 2:
Ohmibod Show
Goal: Cum Show at 1999

BONUS: Some people get really into it and keep playing even once you've reached the goal. These are my favourite days. If you get lucky, multiple tippers will go mad and honestly you can bank big money.

2500+ tokens banked, takes about 5-60 minutes depending on luck really. (£100+)

Portion 3:
Cum Show Ticket Show
50 tokens a ticket

BONUS: You have no idea what you are gonna sell. I normally get 10-20 from 100-300 viewers. the goal is 10.

3000+ banked, takes about 15 minutes depending how good the porn you find is! (£120+)



That is my method. It works. I meet goal most days. 80% at the moment. :pompous:

But I cannot stress enough that the Ohmibod is where the money is for guys. From my experience, anyway. So if you're straight...pretend. Get a toy and pretend. Do it.

Now, obviously it is not that simple. I am 6ft3, 94kg of lean muscle. I have big biceps, thick quads, abs and skinnier calves than any woman. I'm fairly good looking but not like super good looking.

The nature of the beast is that you have to, well, be good looking enough for people to wank over you I guess. Muscle helps. Abs really help. When I was 'bulking' and had a nice layer of chub I got nowhere near the attention I get now.

But you don't need a physique. I've seen skinny guys with WAY more viewers than me. I have no idea of their financials but I am not dumb enough to think there is someone easily doubling my earnings with a better method.

There will be better performers, better looking guys and better ways to earn more.

But this is my method. And I am in love with it. :p

There is a nichè for everything. Man, that fucking hung dwarf guy gets a ton more viewers than me. He's a bloody 2 foot dwarf with a giant cock. That's pretty unique. Again, no idea on money but more viewers in theory should mean more £.

Some skinny dude sits there playing xbox and just chats to people whilst naked and he gets like FIVE TIMES the viewers I do.

So don't think aw mate you think you're some musclehead masterpiece cos I don't and even then it doesn't mean shit...it helps, but there is so much more to camming.

I think the #1 factor is charisma, though. :joyful:

And my number one tip for that is a massive clichè but fuck it. Be yourself.

Personally, that involves being snappy, sarcastic, calling people out, mocking the system and generally just having fun. Aren't I cool, analysing my own charisma. Jesus Christ. But anyway, people love me cos I actually interact with them, don't take any shit and generally enjoy myself on camera.

If a grey user comes in with no tokens and says "show cock bb", I say something like "How about I show you the door to get kicked you rude demanding motherfucker". I probably lose as many tippers as I amuse, but it's me. Adorable doucheiness, right? But it's not an act. Mr Nice Guy works to, I'm sure.

I like to rant about life during the chat segment. I inform viewers of my failed love life and difficulties I'm facing and, well, they boost your ego of course but some regular viewers offer genuine opinions.

My room is known that if anyone disagrees with me they get verbally called out so they aren't too extreme with their advice but I appreciate it. I just ask for social intelligence, really. It is severely lacking on these kind of sites.

Which brings me to the negatives of the 'career'. :sorry:

There's a lot of positives to webcam work.

- Money for wanking.
- Can work from home.
- 2-3 hour long work sessions bring £100+
- Gifts from viewers
- Make some genuine friends and enjoy conversation on the site
- Money for wanking. I mean come on guys!?

But the negatives...there's a lot for me, personally.

Secrecy :nailbiting:

Possibly the biggest negative for me. I hate keeping what I do a secret and only being able to tell a few people what I do. I feel I cannot be open about it due to my career qualifications and the possible effects cam exposure would have on it. But it was my risk to take.

Similarly, my parents have no idea how I make money. Nor my sister. Nor some of my closest friends. I say personal training but avoid questions on it. I am a qualified personal trainer, yes, but I don't do it. It's a logical CV cover up, at least.

Relationships :hungover::hungover::hungover:

For me this has been fucking difficult. Really, really challenging.

I told my first girlfriend who I was with during my £700 chase and she was ashamed, burst into tears and I felt like the biggest piece of shit alive.

My second girlfriend understood but made me stop. She was religious.

My third girlfriend was genuinely impressed, kind of respected it but joked about it to. It became routine and 'work'. She kept it a secret from her friends and parents and went along with the personal trainer gig with me.

Sadly, when we broke up eight months broke up she went rogue on me.

She had seen my username pop up on an e-mail once and swore never to search it. But when we broke up, she did. She saw ohmibod image stills and stuff. No video, thankfully. She says. She accused me of being gay, bisexual, and fucked up.

She said I lied to her by not telling her about the ohmibod portion of the show. I never went into detail about what I did but made the mistake of saying I didn't show my face during wank portions of the show (which is true) but there was my face and...asshole for the world to see on those images. Fuck.

She HATED me for it, threatened to tell my family and once when she was drunk she genuinely messaged my sister saying she was concerned for my career options and mental health relating to what I do. It was hard.

With regards to future girls, I am terrified about how to go about explaining it. I feel if I say it straight away it will scare them off and if I wait too long then I've been lying about going to work and stuff. Eurgh. Any advice here would be appreciated.

Being on camera :stop:
A weird one, but I experience this a lot. Sometimes I am just in a bad fucking mood. And find it very hard to take the endless compliments from tipless viewers and I must come across the biggest asshole.

Similarly, sometimes I just look like complete shit. I've had the shittest day, woke from a nap, not showered, my hairs a mess, I've scratched my face like fuck so am red, shit like that.

So you just don't feel confident or happy so in general your shows suck, you make no money and you feel worse. It's not all rosey.

Viewers :vamp:
Some are lovely. They tip, talk and everyones happy as the show flows and goals are reached and everyones cums away happy.

Some are not. Some shows just do not flow. No-one talks to you. Those that do are not contributing and are just constantly asking you if you'd ever fuck a guy or if guys check you out in the gym changing room. Do people really get off to that!?

Some are rude. Some will literally come in your room to insult you. Please laugh at these bizarre individuals. How pathetic. From 'your dick is small' to 'ur on steroids' to straight up 'you're ugly', trolls are gonna troll.

Some are fucking obsessed. They ask to you to fuck their wife, meet up in a hotel, fart into the microphone for 25 tokens (I mean come on!?), people are fucking psycho. You kick them, they make a new account and come back.

I had a user buy me a gift and he felt like he owned me. He asked for my phone number to take the relationship 'to the next level' and couldn't understand I wanted to keep camming seperate from my personal life. He got increasingly stranger and began threatening me. I kicked him but he would send me e-mails about details I described in my shows that night, so he was obviously still there, somewhere. Creepy.

It's best just ignore these guys. Without a reaction they go away. Fucked up that some 50 year old fat american guy feels the need to act like that.

I had another viewer send me an e-mail with a load of screenshots from my show and threaten to put them in my local newspaper. Again, I just ignore this shit but what the fuck.

I got banned twice from viewers with a dedicated hatred for me. This is Chaturbates only flaw in my opinion but support were good and understood. Read the Terms and Conditions and don't break them, then even the stupidest haters can't fuck you over. Simple.

Private shows can be...odd. I've had shows where I had to watch someone play snooker and comment on his sexual body language for 20 minutes. I had to convince someone to sit on a vase over the phone. This was very early on and I wouldn't do stuff like that again, but it was good money. I shaved my pubes on camera. I had requests to demean, spit on, piss on, shit on the Quran from a Muslim. I passed on that one. I've had shows where people just want to chat as well. But be prepared for the grim stuff. And the evil viewers.

Housebound :(

This is a personal one.

My job keeps me housebound. Away from real people.

At the moment I am single, my friends have moved away and I only really leave the house for the gym.

Don't let yourself get in that position. Please.

Exposure :dead:
As mentioned earlier, the dangers of being 'exposed' are real.

Embarrassment within family and friendship groups, potential job limitations, pictures going online, that sort of thing. It's all real.

Type in my CB username and there's a ton of recorded content out there. Tons of it.

Somehow this spreads to twitter, male webcam video sites, 'bestusernames.com' which basically involves people adding you on Skype and such to have gay Skype sex...no thanks Sanjeet, I'm good buddy.

You will be on the internet. Forever. DMCA may help once I eventually stop but...it will be on there forever somewhere.

Getting paid :greedy:
I get paid in dollars so I have to cash the cheque and wait bloody ages for it to be converted. Then they take a conversion fee for that. So I get my payment about 3 weeks after the payday ends. Which sucks. the americans get to straight to their bank!

Also, Chaturbate takes 50% of the token value. There are sites that take less but, meh. I'm happy where I am.

Technical Issues :droid:
Sometimes my internet goes meaning the 2 hours I've spent building up viewers is wasted. Or the site crashes and the same happens. That's fucking annoying, let me tell you. Then you get people accusing you of not completing a show they've paid for and oh, it's just delightful.

IN CONCLUSION:

I have rambled enough, that is my experience webcamming. It's not perfectly written, there's so much more to discuss and say and I'm sorry if it's very 'texty.' I hope I can edit this post. I also hope I come off positive about the experience, even with its problems. I LOVE what I do. It has a fair share of negatives but I do generally enjoy 'working' and having a successful night is an incredible feeling. Very, very fulfilling.

If anyone has any thoughts, advice or questions, please do share :) I love the forum.

James :cat:
 
As a male, this is very helpful. I have a full time job that I love, and just wanted this as a side to help pay bills and better my life. A huge amount of shame comes with it, and I never plan on telling a soul.

As for what you've said, it's true. As a fit male, I receive tons of comments about my body and how it looks. That being said, having extra skin from significant weight loss sucks. I have 9% body fat despite being 250 pounds. I have huge arms but no abs. That portion does suck.

I want to invest in the ohmibod as everyone says the thought and illusion of doing something to someone is powerful. If you're getting off, maybe it works anyways.

I do have to ask, have you tried doing it, without the ohmibod but stating you do have it? Or does showing it make that much of a difference
 
So if you're straight not into butt stuff...pretend. Get a toy and pretend. Do it.

Fixed it for ya
 
OK, I've been chipping away at this post for the last two nights between video shoots so this may be a little cobbled together.

You know, I really did enjoy reading this all the way through. This was a lot to read in one post and I, personally, might recommend making a thread and discussing each idea/phase individually, i.e. post one thought/time period one day, let people comment, and then post the next. You have some awesome observations but it's hard to read through in one sitting. It's all out there, whatever. I am just saying, if you wanted to make a blog about being a male SW you could probably drive a ton of traffic to yourself as that isn't a topic often discussed. Hint hint hint.

Anyway, as someone who got into the biz under similar circumstances +4 years ago (though have taken an entirely fetishistic route) it's cool to read it from a male POV. I did end up finishing school (though it took 6 years) but yeah, I was half cackling reminiscing about my first shows. I almost think it's easier to deal with being a SW as a woman when it comes to relationships because when people think SW they think prostitutes-- they think women--and it's a little easier to overcome because it's expected. At least, that's been my experience as a professional dominatrix and fetish model. I can't really speak for the wonderful women on the forum who do more vanilla stuff because I know that has its own tone as well. Either way, rest assured, when the right person comes along they will be developed enough to see you as a human being with multiple facets rather than an occupation.

It is *extremely* difficult to get into the headspace to work sometimes and rest assured, you aren't alone. It's natural. This is a demanding job. If you truly love SW, maybe look into doing clips on Clips4Sale. There are a ton of fetishes dudes can make money on. I am pretty much clip-exclusive and charge out the ass for sessions and you know what? Sometimes the money isn't worth it no matter what it is. Don't ever beat yourself up over burnout, it happens to everyone and when it does, the best thing you can do is take care of yourself, get through it, and set boundaries to keep it from happening again.

There's good money for good looking guys in even solo content. Get tested, explore your solo interests, get involved in your local scene. This industry is amazingly flexible if you are able to be professional.
 
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Reactions: AudriTwo and Picnic
Nice read. But would refer you to the camming as kayfabe thread and also the does it matter ohmibod is fake and lovense often is thread also. Personally, I'd have thought the gay for pay angle was of more note as something to discuss both the chat in PMs and c2c given you've told us you're 100% straight
 
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