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Ask-a-Fan (Questions models have for viewers)

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Vixxen81

Cam Model
Nov 3, 2022
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This thread might turn out to be a really idea but I figured let's give it a shot and if it goes tits up we can nuke it a turn it into an inside joke or something.

Models, if you could get honest & unbiased feedback or insight into a viewer's mind, what questions would you ask?
 
Eh in hindsight I realize this might just be all "things people say that make you go WTF," but let's see how it plays out.

I want to know why guys on Chaturbate insist on not chatting but then blame a lack of chat for not tipping.
How "crazy" (emotional, demanding, unstable) does a model have to be before you're like "nope!"?
Is it really about the sexual stuff or is the connection more important or both or it depends or it changes?
Do you want to be able to hold a conversation with a model in the first place?
 
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I want to know why guys on Chaturbate insist on not chatting but then blame a lack of chat for not tipping.

I couldn’t tell ya, but I guess laziness? They want an entertaining room but they want everyone else to do the work to make it that way? I dunno. I don’t get it either.

How "crazy" (emotional, demanding, unstable) does a model have to be before you're like "nope!"?

“Crazy” comes in many flavors of course, but in general, if it’s spoiling the mood during my visits, it’ll eventually feel like a chore to keep visiting, and I’ll stop.

In the examples you gave, emotional is fine as long as there’s no unnecessary lashing out at people that don’t deserve the heat. But everyone has their moments, so it’s totally understandable once in a while.

Demanding - depends how persistent they are and how unreasonable the demands are. Demanding tips for performances is completely fine, for example. But demanding a guy take you private (has happened to me), or demanding they show up every night on schedule, stuff like that is out of bounds. And again, anything that spoils the fun will remove my incentive to return again.

“Unstable” is the example you gave that would chase me away the fastest, because there could be an element of actual danger involved.

Is it really about the sexual stuff or is the connection more important or both or it depends or it changes?

For me it depends on the model. The ones that have had me as a longtime regular are a combination of both. But I visit some models specifically for transactional “sexual stuff” with little conversation, and also one or two models that I rarely tip for sexy stuff but I continue visiting and tipping “just because,” because I enjoy their personalities (and by extension, I enjoy the vibes of their rooms, even on nights when I could care less about seeing anything explicit).

Do you want to be able to hold a conversation with a model in the first place?

Not necessarily a conversation, although that is a great selling point. I just want the interaction to be pleasant. In other words, it’s fine if a model and I have awkward verbal/written chemistry as long as we’re both pleasant and kind about it. A good attitude makes up for a lot.

But as always, that’s just my opinion, and there’s always a chance I’m an outlier.
 

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I couldn’t tell ya, but I guess laziness? They want an entertaining room but they want everyone else to do the work to make it that way? I dunno. I don’t get it either.



“Crazy” comes in many flavors of course, but in general, if it’s spoiling the mood during my visits, it’ll eventually feel like a chore to keep visiting, and I’ll stop.

In the examples you gave, emotional is fine as long as there’s no unnecessary lashing out at people that don’t deserve the heat. But everyone has their moments, so it’s totally understandable once in a while.

Demanding - depends how persistent they are and how unreasonable the demands are. Demanding tips for performances is completely fine, for example. But demanding a guy take you private (has happened to me), or demanding they show up every night on schedule, stuff like that is out of bounds. And again, anything that spoils the fun will remove my incentive to return again.

“Unstable” is the example you gave that would chase me away the fastest, because there could be an element of actual danger involved.



For me it depends on the model. The ones that have had me as a longtime regular are a combination of both. But I visit some models specifically for transactional “sexual stuff” with little conversation, and also one or two models that I rarely tip for sexy stuff but I continue visiting and tipping “just because,” because I enjoy their personalities (and by extension, I enjoy the vibes of their rooms, even on nights when I could care less about seeing anything explicit).



Not necessarily a conversation, although that is a great selling point. I just want the interaction to be pleasant. In other words, it’s fine if a model and I have awkward verbal/written chemistry as long as we’re both pleasant and kind about it. A good attitude makes up for a lot.

But as always, that’s just my opinion, and there’s always a chance I’m an outlier.
Very thoughtful reply and confirms everything I was thinking when I asked the questions. :) It's frustrating to me that I go into other rooms and see viewers talking to each other and not really at the model but in my room people talk directly to me and ignore everyone else. I could be doing something sexy while they chat among themselves. Instead I feel like I'm the subject of an FBI interview.
 
Very thoughtful reply and confirms everything I was thinking when I asked the questions. :) It's frustrating to me that I go into other rooms and see viewers talking to each other and not really at the model but in my room people talk directly to me and ignore everyone else. I could be doing something sexy while they chat among themselves. Instead I feel like I'm the subject of an FBI interview.

I can understand that being frustrating. Honestly, I’m guilty of ignoring other users in public chat sometimes too. Often it’s just tunnel vision (I came to visit the model and I focus on that). But also, members can be annoying to each other too, just like they can irritate models. In a way, I’m protecting my own experience in the room by not allowing someone else to potentially ruin the vibe.
 
Eh in hindsight I realize this might just be all "things people say that make you go WTF," but let's see how it plays out.

I want to know why guys on Chaturbate insist on not chatting but then blame a lack of chat for not tipping.
How "crazy" (emotional, demanding, unstable) does a model have to be before you're like "nope!"?
Is it really about the sexual stuff or is the connection more important or both or it depends or it changes?
Do you want to be able to hold a conversation with a model in the first place?

  • I imagine that the lack of chat is just a convenient excuse not to tip. If it weren’t that it would be something else
  • Interesting question. I have really only had one model who I thought was literally crazy. But she was a pleasant enough crazy. She had a tattoo of the Indian god Ganesh which I complimented and she went on to tell me in all seriousness that she’d had a full conversation with Ganesh when she had been going through a rough time. And I don’t mean that she had just prayed to Ganesh, she swore she was getting answers from Ganesh and it was a real conversation.
  • What I find more often is demanding. Mostly in terms of wanting me in their room every day and once there to spend their whole shift with them. At a certain point this gets tiring and makes visiting the room feel like an obligation and not as fun.
  • It definitely is mostly about the sexual stuff for me, at least at first. But I have had a couple of cases where the rapport made visiting the model without the sexual stuff just as fun. I had one case where over time I realized I actually didn’t like the sexual show of a model but I had been visiting and tipping her for a long time specifically because she was so funny and engaging.
  • Personally, I like to have conversation or banter with people in general so yes I want a conversation. But it doesn’t have to be the case. As Smoothie said, sometimes it is very transactional about the sex. I know one model I visit who has barely any two-way conversation at all with me - none written and very little verbal. It feels weird but it isn’t a problem.
 
I want to know why guys on Chaturbate insist on not chatting but then blame a lack of chat for not tipping.
I am not on CB but have never seen or heard of guys using that as an excuse for not tipping. As to why they do not chat, well, it can be hard to type with one hand I guess ;) Or maybe they just have no real ability to converse.

How "crazy" (emotional, demanding, unstable) does a model have to be before you're like "nope!"?
I am not sure that I have ever been in the room of a "crazy" model. Generally I would say no amount of crazy would be acceptable to me. BUT... ;) I am now reminded that in my early days on SC, I did become a regular in a room of a model who was VERY jealous of other models, like even the general mention that other models might exist in the lives of me or other users. But she was not particularly petulant about it (with me anyway) and readily admitted this failing of hers and she was a very nice girl otherwise and much fun to play with and talk to. So it was not a deal-breaker for me, and I only stopped visiting and lost touch when my financial situation changed such that I could no longer regularly visit more than one model.

(She was Ukrainian, I do so hope that she has remained safe this last year :( )

Is it really about the sexual stuff or is the connection more important or both or it depends or it changes?
For me it has always been both (except in my early days when I was sometimes browsing "purely" from horniness ;) ). Naturally I would pay a visit to a room because the model caught my eye in some way physically, but would certainly not revisit if it became apparent that the model was "not for me" (i.e. we did not "click")

Do you want to be able to hold a conversation with a model in the first place?
If I am to be a regular visitor, then yes. Personally I "need" some sort of human connection, and that of course means useful conversation apart from the old chatroom ASL Check ;) And also the general chat and "demeanor" of other users and the room in general. Whether it is considered the "correct" way to use cam sites or not, I tend to look on visiting rooms like visiting a pub or a party, if the "crowd" do not appeal to me, I do not stay :)
 
How "crazy" (emotional, demanding, unstable) does a model have to be before you're like "nope!"?
I've never really encountered anything too bad. My favourite model and I can definitely "fall out" sometimes but that's because we've become quite friendly offline and I guess when people get to know each other better then expectations and behaviours change. Things that I would brush off with a random model bug me when they come from her. Likewise, I bug the shit out of her sometimes and we need a couple of days to reset.
Is it really about the sexual stuff or is the connection more important or both or it depends or it changes?
For me it's not about the sexual stuff on the whole. It's the entire experience. I can get the sexual stuff from porn alone. The human element is the biggest factor for me. Of course obviously I get horny and go private or tip for sexual things in public but it's not the only draw in terms of returning to a room. Another thing is that there are a thousand models out there who stream naked, just rubbing their pussy and moaning. I avoid them like the plague. A dressed, classy model is way more attractive.
Do you want to be able to hold a conversation with a model in the first place?
Obviously I'm sexually attracted to the physical attributes but intelligence is way sexier than any of that. If a model can't hold a conversation with me then I'm not interested at all.
 
I can understand that being frustrating. Honestly, I’m guilty of ignoring other users in public chat sometimes too. Often it’s just tunnel vision (I came to visit the model and I focus on that). But also, members can be annoying to each other too, just like they can irritate models. In a way, I’m protecting my own experience in the room by not allowing someone else to potentially ruin the vibe.
There are definitely users who visit my model friend who I like to engage with. It's easier sometimes to conduct a three or four way conversation than a one on one. I also know that she quite likes when there is a fair bit of chat in her room because it can make a shift pass more quickly. Equally, there are other users who I don't want to engage with at all. Definitely the horny randoms who turn up or the fetish guys (who always seem too focused on their fetish to engage). I also find that there are sometimes users - usually of the whale variety - who make a point of not engaging with other users, even when addressed directly and who want to dominate the room by controlling all of the interactions with the model.
 
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How do you feel about grey chat being on? Does it affect your decision to visit a room and/or tip?

I alternate between having it off and on. On when it's slower and I'm hoping for more people talking to me, off when there's too much begging and otherwise annoying behavior or when I'm doing a longer show I don't want to have to stop to moderate. I do however sometimes worry that I might be scaring off paying members by having grey chat on, even though I use the ban feature very generously, so my chat is not flooded with "open bobs bb" type of comments.
 
How do you feel about grey chat being on? Does it affect your decision to visit a room and/or tip?

I alternate between having it off and on. On when it's slower and I'm hoping for more people talking to me, off when there's too much begging and otherwise annoying behavior or when I'm doing a longer show I don't want to have to stop to moderate. I do however sometimes worry that I might be scaring off paying members by having grey chat on, even though I use the ban feature very generously, so my chat is not flooded with "open bobs bb" type of comments.
For me gray user chat on is fine so long as it is moderated where needed. I particularly do not like when dudes are allowed to spam the chat, that is a turn off
 
Why do some members come in, say hi, and when I say hi back, they either leave or say nothing further? I can't get my head around it and it makes me feel soooo stupid to say hi back to the walls.
 
How do you feel about grey chat being on? Does it affect your decision to visit a room and/or tip?

I alternate between having it off and on. On when it's slower and I'm hoping for more people talking to me, off when there's too much begging and otherwise annoying behavior or when I'm doing a longer show I don't want to have to stop to moderate. I do however sometimes worry that I might be scaring off paying members by having grey chat on, even though I use the ban feature very generously, so my chat is not flooded with "open bobs bb" type of comments.
On SC, grey chat is usually ok, but a room that allows unregistered users to chat is usually (IME) just a shit-show of nonsense in the chat, and I leave quickly.
 
1.Dunno about the don't tip excuse.

2. This is kinda a hard One. Almost every lady I follow has one or more of the following depression/anxiety/bipolar/adhd and so on. Some of it is caused because of the depression is because of the job but I think the job also attracts people with emotional difficulties. Only 2 people that I left because I thought "crazy" first one had fallen for trump's bullshit and after she referred to the vp as a "fake black woman" that I just didn't want to deal with her shit. Other one just had an ego and thought she was better then other camgirls and made a fucked up comment about girls who do nudity.
I will say from experience guys r less likely to view a lady who looks pissed off.

3. Personality is a big thing, ofc almost always enter a room because I think the lady is hot but I wouldn't stay if I didn't enjoy their company lady's I follow vary from non nude to full nudity, I often go into rooms that r hardcore but even so I do still follow some ladies who do that. Safe to say most anonymous viewers will go into a room with full nudity on display.

4. I'm an introvert so I often struggle with chatting I definitely like to talk to a girl but there r times when I just stay in the room and say nothing but just tip and post couple of gifs.

Mika greys dont bother me in that sense as long as they're just as likely to get silenced for saying shit as a tipper would.


Lilly honestly I think they're just being polite, but I'm only guessing, could also be trying to read the room and your attitude in how u respond to hi.
 
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Why do some members come in, say hi, and when I say hi back, they either leave or say nothing further? I can't get my head around it and it makes me feel soooo stupid to say hi back to the walls.
It’s a good question.

A lot of models explicitly ask users to say hello when they enter their room in their room rules so some may be conditioned to say hello every time even if they don’t intend to stay or aren’t comfortable chatting

I definitely would not take somebody entering and leaving your room personally. There are many many reasons why this might happen and most of them are not because of an issue with the model
 
Why do some members come in, say hi, and when I say hi back, they either leave or say nothing further? I can't get my head around it and it makes me feel soooo stupid to say hi back to the walls.
Are you on Streamate? There's no way on SM to check an online model's profile without entering the room so sometimes users entering the room to check a profile or to check the pics/tags may get caught in an awkward hello moment. I wouldn't take it personally.
 
How do you feel about grey chat being on? Does it affect your decision to visit a room and/or tip?

I alternate between having it off and on. On when it's slower and I'm hoping for more people talking to me, off when there's too much begging and otherwise annoying behavior or when I'm doing a longer show I don't want to have to stop to moderate. I do however sometimes worry that I might be scaring off paying members by having grey chat on, even though I use the ban feature very generously, so my chat is not flooded with "open bobs bb" type of comments.

I don’t mind greys in the chat at all, as long as they’re not flooding the room with nonsense. But I could say the same thing about any user color level. If turning off grey chat helps you control that, it’s all good.

If it’s about freeloaders lingering and doing nothing but talk, I get far more irritated when members with tokens do that than greys.

Why do some members come in, say hi, and when I say hi back, they either leave or say nothing further? I can't get my head around it and it makes me feel soooo stupid to say hi back to the walls.

I have experienced this awkwardness from the other side.

For me, when I am in a browsing mood - looking for new rooms, or just unsure of where I want to park myself that day - I enter rooms briefly. If I’m there for 30 seconds to a minute, by that time the model has already said hello. I say it back to be polite, but yeah, I might leave afterward. It does feel awkward, but at that point it’s a choice between being rude (ignoring a “hello”) or awkward (responding and then leaving). Honestly not sure how to make the situation more comfortable.

Let me add that if I leave quickly, it’s not a reflection of what I think of the model at all. It’s almost always that I’m in the mood for/on the hunt for something specific in that moment.
 
I don't take it personally, never said that I did - if I was to take something personally, of all the things I hear, it wouldn't be a hello. So it's not that I'm offended or anything, I'm just honestly trying to understand what's behind it. It doesn't bother me at all when people enter and leave - that's part of how the site works - it's the saying hello and then nothing after that I don't get.
 
For me, when I am in a browsing mood - looking for new rooms, or just unsure of where I want to park myself that day - I enter rooms briefly. If I’m there for 30 seconds to a minute, by that time the model has already said hello. I say it back to be polite, but yeah, I might leave afterward. It does feel awkward, but at that point it’s a choice between being rude (ignoring a “hello”) or awkward (responding and then leaving). Honestly not sure how to make the situation more comfortable.

Let me add that if I leave quickly, it’s not a reflection of what I think of the model at all. It’s almost always that I’m in the mood for/on the hunt for something specific in that moment.
Sorry to double post but this want here when I replied. That does give me some understanding of the situation so thanks 😊
 
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I don't take it personally, never said that I did - if I was to take something personally, of all the things I hear, it wouldn't be a hello. So it's not that I'm offended or anything, I'm just honestly trying to understand what's behind it. It doesn't bother me at all when people enter and leave - that's part of how the site works - it's the saying hello and then nothing after that I don't get.
Sorry, I worded it badly. I meant more that it was less of a reflection on you and probably more on the users motives or mood at that time. Which is what I think Smoothie managed to say much more effectively than me.
 
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it's the saying hello and then nothing after that I don't get.

I do think some of it is possibly due to guys who are introverted, or just are not natural “talkers,” feeling obligated to at least say hello.

There are a lot of models who require a “hello” in their room rules, in my experience. An introvert might not want to talk, but also doesn’t want to get kicked out of the room for not saying hi.

It might also be a passive aggressive way for a member to test if the model is paying attention to that room, especially if they appear to be split-streaming.
 
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I do think some of it is possibly due to guys who are introverted, or just are not natural “talkers,” feeling obligated to at least say hello.

There are a lot of models who require a “hello” in their room rules, in my experience. An introvert might not want to talk, but also doesn’t want to get kicked out of the room for not saying hi.

It might also be a passive aggressive way for a member to test if the model is paying attention to that room, especially if they appear to be split-streaming.
The other thing I would say is that often the exchange of hellos turns into small talk and I’m not always up for it if I haven’t even decided if I am going to stay in the room yet. It goes like this:

Model: Hi
Me: Hi
Model: How are you?
Me: fine thanks
Model: great

I am often the one who lets that Peter out not because I am annoyed or unfriendly but just because I am reading the profile, trying to get the read of the room, etc. and I am not that interested in dragging the small talk out at that point
 
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Do you (honestly) care about the political stuff going on around online sex work (payment processor bans, category restrictions, laws about porn)?
I do, but I am a guy who likes to "know" stuff. Not in a nefarious way, I just like to (am interested to) know how things work; what is going on "behind the curtain" as it were. It gives me and other users who may be interested, an insight into the pressures models have or just the type so things they have to deal with or manage in their working lives. And I do truly believe that the more we each (models and users) understand the others' perspective / motivations / necessities, the better our joint experience can be.

Actually that last statement is what I believe about ALL human interactions, anywhere.
 
Do you (honestly) care about the political stuff going on around online sex work (payment processor bans, category restrictions, laws about porn)?
I didn't used to care about it but with visiting the same model regularly, a lot of the practicalities of the job come up in conversation. Most of it is about how the business works rather than a wider discussion around the politics though. I would probably care about a lot of the political stuff if I actually knew more about it but I'm not sure even she does so we don't discuss it.

The things I do try and listen to her about are things like which site to take her pvt on (i.e. which gives her the better cut) and things like cut off times for earnings - e.g. If I'm going to take her pvt that week and doing so on Wednesday rather than Friday means it will go in this months pay then I try to accommodate that. I know those things aren't on the same level of importance as bigger political issues but they are important to her I guess.

Also, I'm pretty mainstream and vanilla in my tastes so the subject of banned categories and content rarely would come up in discussion.
 
I do, but I am a guy who likes to "know" stuff. Not in a nefarious way, I just like to (am interested to) know how things work; what is going on "behind the curtain" as it were. It gives me and other users who may be interested, an insight into the pressures models have or just the type so things they have to deal with or manage in their working lives. And I do truly believe that the more we each (models and users) understand the others' perspective / motivations / necessities, the better our joint experience can be.

Actually that last statement is what I believe about ALL human interactions, anywhere.
You posted that just as I was typing my post. Same here. I like to know how it works and if there is anything I can do differently that helps. It also helps me understand why she might have been snappy with me that day, or which days to tip more.
 
I didn't used to care about it but with visiting the same model regularly, a lot of the practicalities of the job come up in conversation. Most of it is about how the business works rather than a wider discussion around the politics though. I would probably care about a lot of the political stuff if I actually knew more about it but I'm not sure even she does so we don't discuss it.

The things I do try and listen to her about are things like which site to take her pvt on (i.e. which gives her the better cut) and things like cut off times for earnings - e.g. If I'm going to take her pvt that week and doing so on Wednesday rather than Friday means it will go in this months pay then I try to accommodate that. I know those things aren't on the same level of importance as bigger political issues but they are important to her I guess.

Also, I'm pretty mainstream and vanilla in my tastes so the subject of banned categories and content rarely would come up in discussion.
God bless you for this.

I asked a viewer to please be more mindful of payout schedules if he's trying to "help" me and his response was, "so what if it takes 7 days on OF you still got it." Bro, way to totally miss the whollllle point of the conversation.
 
You posted that just as I was typing my post. Same here. I like to know how it works and if there is anything I can do differently that helps. It also helps me understand why she might have been snappy with me that day, or which days to tip more.
I wish I could tell my viewers, in a mature and adult way, that I am on cam but also on my period and I am not going to be tolerable to a lot of shenanigans like I normally will be. Of course, I could not get on cam and just rest but all you see is dolla dolla bills going to someone else while laying there miserable and wishing you could take hormonal birth control or get a uterine hysterectomy so the issue becomes a nonissue. Sorry if this was TMI, but it is a large part of our lives and something that interferes with energy levels and emotional stability.

I finally realized that when I am sick and tired of hearing men's opinions, I'm probably going to start within the next 48 hours.
 
I do, but I am a guy who likes to "know" stuff. Not in a nefarious way, I just like to (am interested to) know how things work; what is going on "behind the curtain" as it were. It gives me and other users who may be interested, an insight into the pressures models have or just the type so things they have to deal with or manage in their working lives. And I do truly believe that the more we each (models and users) understand the others' perspective / motivations / necessities, the better our joint experience can be.

Actually that last statement is what I believe about ALL human interactions, anywhere.
You can start by reading all of SESTA/FOSTA.
 
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