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It's been a long time

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BritneySiren

Inactive Cam Model
I've been away for a bit. Trying to find my way back to the world of the living slowly. I had a very rough time starting around this time last year when I lost my grandmother (who raised me) to going through a very violent break up with an abusive ex.

I missed out on a lot of work opportunities because of that person for no reason. I could've shot gg or worked some of the local fetish parties but never did. I certainly would've been further along financially if I didn't waste so much time trying to appease and take care of a giant man child.

The callous nature that I saw after my grams death cemented an awareness that I'd never achieved before. I always had her to run to if life wasnt going well. It wasn't the safest home but it was somewhere to go to not sleep on the streets until I could figure some other things out work wise. I could rent a room on weekends and cam there and shoot stuff and get a decent night sleep for a few days. I would always find ways to survive.

But now I want to do more than survive. I have so many ideas and passions I'd like to peruse. I'd like to work with other models, travel and in general live more than I did while isolated and feeling like no one could ever really care for me when it was just projecting the reality of one man into the world.

I don't think anyone, man or woman should let another soul control their life especially when they say one thing while doing another. I finally understand why and how I came to be in that situation and I will do my best to stay away from ppl who aren't looking out for my best interest.

I hope that you all have a healthy support system in person or online. Ppl around who build you up and offer constructive criticism instead of making everything about you seem wrong. I just wish everyone a happy and successful life.

Thank you for reading
 
the title of this thread made me think of this song. now i'm in a Aaliyah hole:headphone:



*hugs* you got this bb! i'm excited for the next part of your life!
 
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