keeping an erection while on cam

[marcusmongeau]

hey guys, im marcus and i cammed from april to june, the first month was a bit slow but the second month i was able to make 1000 dollars easy and so on, but then some things changed, i stopped seeing cam modeling as fun and started seeing it as a job, and now i can not think of camming as something people do for fun and only as a way to get money. thats makes it hard for me to get an erection, i was able to fix tht issue by asking my boyfriend to have sex with me on cam, and he did it twice but it was not really for him and he didnt like that other people were watching him, so after that i tried watching porn movies i liked while on cam but it just turns out to be useless, it got to a point where i got to a cumshow goal twice in a row without cumming or having an erection. sometimes i wish i was a woman so i could get over it, but then i started watching another gay cam models (twinks, since that is the group i fit in) and many of them dont have erections and dont masturbate, they only do anal play, but my public wanted me to mostly finger myself while jerking off and that was perfect until it become a way to get money instead of a way to have fun. so on resume my question is:

Do you guys think its possible to be a sucessful male gay cam model and never do cum shows or have an erection never say never, it might happen from times to times when im more relaxed and whatnot but cumming on camera right now is just impossible ro me. also i was camming on chaturbate and im to ashamed to go back to the same camming site and be found again by old customers who might bring me down on my mood (even though they were huge tippers)

I would really like to back to the camming industry, i just dont know if anal play would be enough for my guys

all the answers help, thank you

 

[mike_aussie]

I was worried about not being able to get an erection on demand but I have had users tip me and say they didn't mind if I was hard or not, they just liked seeing me naked. Now I try not to care. If I really need to get hard I watch cams or porn (out of view of the cam of course).

I've also been reluctant to cum on cam but am coming (no pun intended) around to the idea. I'm just taking my time to get comfortable with it.

 

[leonstardust]

Hey @marcusmongeau, thanks for sharing your story and about your struggle. I can relate to some points and have faced the question of how to "perform well" and what this would mean for me. On one hand I also associate that with performing well by having, maintaining, showing off an erection. A thought that generates pressure and in worst case does the opposite. Similar to the thought that you have to have an erection to generate money. This goes against all somatic principles, I guess.
For me it helps to see other levels of meaning in the term "perfom well". To perform well, first of all, you need a strong personal motivation, and since we as cammers work with both body and soul (for example arousal) more or less equally, it would probably also mean to have some sort of fun. I always again remind myself of the question, how can I make it fun for myself? And I read and imagine that you have tried similar, by trying with your boyfriend or with watching porn.
I have found it fruitful to consider follwing positions, thoughts, advices:

- There are infinite possibilities to find arousal, if you open up not only to the obviously new fields (for example changing from vanilla to bdsm or other kinks), but to listen to your body and heart, feel into every little corner, rediscover what seems to be already well known. I got encouraged in this position by friends who work in sexual consultation, and I found it to be helpful.

- Ask myself: what would I like to do today? Maybe it is something completely different from what I ususally would think is the "right" thing to do. Put on a different music. Don't care to be seductive, but talk about philosophy or cooking recipes (as examples). This is an adivce I have gratefully read here many times. And I ususally was surprised how well it works, when I really opened up myself for it. Because it really brings out your own personality and fun, something that I find hard to do strategically and on purpose.

- Even when the money is involved (I know, that is a strong force), remind yourself of the potential and original intention of fun and pleasure which the camming has for you. Feel into it. Detach from the thought of money, let it go, and attach to your own pleasure. Make it the priority. Because also in my experience, it doesn't work the other way round. When the motivation for money becomes to dominant, the arousal, fun, passion dies. It is a delicate balance, since of course, most of us still care for the money and need to be business people.

This is spoken from my little experience. I am not depending on the money from the camming, so it is much easier for me, I guess, to preserve or get back to the pleasure. I still hope this can help you or others. And I am highly curious to hear more about this topic from other (male) performers. Also thanks to @mike_aussie for sharing!

Also, another note about the regulars, who you imagine come with a certain expectation, and you don't know how much you have to fit that. I think you can only be a good performer when you do what you like. And don't do it for the expectation of the audience. I think, even if some won't like to adapt to any changes you introduce, and maybe leave, you will build your audience by being genuine on your pleasure and what you like to do. Risk failure. We can only learn and move forward by risking and making mistakes.

 

[-xoxo-]

hey guys, im marcus and i cammed from april to june, the first month was a bit slow but the second month i was able to make 1000 dollars easy and so on, but then some things changed, i stopped seeing cam modeling as fun and started seeing it as a job, and now i can not think of camming as something people do for fun and only as a way to get money. thats makes it hard for me to get an erection, i was able to fix tht issue by asking my boyfriend to have sex with me on cam, and he did it twice but it was not really for him and he didnt like that other people were watching him, so after that i tried watching porn movies i liked while on cam but it just turns out to be useless, it got to a point where i got to a cumshow goal twice in a row without cumming or having an erection. sometimes i wish i was a woman so i could get over it, but then i started watching another gay cam models (twinks, since that is the group i fit in) and many of them dont have erections and dont masturbate, they only do anal play, but my public wanted me to mostly finger myself while jerking off and that was perfect until it become a way to get money instead of a way to have fun. so on resume my question is:

Do you guys think its possible to be a sucessful male gay cam model and never do cum shows or have an erection never say never, it might happen from times to times when im more relaxed and whatnot but cumming on camera right now is just impossible ro me. also i was camming on chaturbate and im to ashamed to go back to the same camming site and be found again by old customers who might bring me down on my mood (even though they were huge tippers)

I would really like to back to the camming industry, i just dont know if anal play would be enough for my guys

all the answers help, thank you

Maybe the customers who brought you down did it because it turned them on and that's why they tipped. But, don't let those people get to you. Just say "thank you for the tip but... " tell them you don't appreciate their words or just kick/ban them. I hope all is going well for you if you've gotten back to camming.

 

[pimpsmack23]

I'm fairly new to broadcasting myself, and have not had an issue at all. My trick is to look at other model's rooms that I usually follow or check out some of the rooms of the models who come into my room, to see if that helps. Bonus points to the models who come in there, talk dirty, and are really getting into it on their own cams too.