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someone is falling in love with me

Discussion in 'Ask-a-Model!' started by Nina L, Mar 12, 2018.

  1. Nina L

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2018
    Messages:
    5
    what do you do when a guy you do shows with is falling (but really falling) in love with you ? I'm afraid to hurt him... Because I am what I am and it's very weird to mix feelings and the "work" together... Maybe I'm just being silly... but really I would like to know what to do in those kinds of situation ? do you encourage it ? (the guy is really a nice person, kind and generous, etc.)

    sorry for my english, still working on it !
     
  2. AwesomeKate

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2012
    Messages:
    777
    A guy who I thought was in love with me actually wasn't. He tipped me a lot and talked to me every day but it turns out he just thought it was fun and sexy and wasn't actually interested in being with me. So... Maybe just ask him how he feels?
     
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  3. Songbird_Shelly

    Joined:
    May 24, 2015
    Messages:
    2,063
    Are you sure it's love, and not lust?
     
  4. Wolf_3_5_9

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2018
    Messages:
    111
    I would say just be honest about your boundaries ("I never meet members in real life", etc.) if it ever comes up.

    "Encouraging it" is a broad spectrum. On one end, it's your job to be sexy, flirty, and try to connect to your members emotionally. On the other end is manipulation through saying things like "If only I had enough money, I could come see you," while having no intention of doing that. If you stick to the former and not the latter, I think you are OK.
     
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  5. WickedTouch

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2011
    Messages:
    2,335
    Personally, I hold to the idea that what happens in camland, should always stay in camland.

    More than likely he has fallen for your performance... your on-screen cam persona, not the real you. Just tell him that you are simply a little princess made out of pixels who exists only on his computer, but like a fish taken out of the water, you can't exist in another world.

    ;)
     
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  6. Pure_emotion

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2013
    Messages:
    422
    For some people is just a fantasy, they never gonna act on it.
     
  7. Goblin

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2018
    Messages:
    44
    I may be wrong, but I think OP is talking about doing B/G shows and the guy is falling for her, not a member.
     
  8. ForceTen

    Joined:
    May 11, 2017
    Messages:
    1,361
    That is how I took it as as well. Either way, just inquire.
     
  9. Nina L

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2018
    Messages:
    5
    Yeah we talked about it actually and it's mostly not sexual he only pay me for talking with him... and he actually told me he was starting to feel sad about how he feels...
     
  10. ForceTen

    Joined:
    May 11, 2017
    Messages:
    1,361
    Was it a member then, or is it someone you do a M/F cam show with?
     
  11. AudriTwo

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2014
    Messages:
    3,900
    You need to lay out clear boundaries. Don't be afraid to hurt someone's feelings. It's crueler to lead them on by not being honest. Which will end up hurting them more in the end. If it costs you a reg, oh well.

    If you do enjoy your talks with him, tell him. But mention it's strictly platonic.
     
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  12. Starman

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2017
    Messages:
    99
    "mostly" not sexual. So, it is sexual, but not ONLY sexual. And he's hoping you feel the same. That's my guess.

    I suggest telling him - or hinting - that you have a boyfriend. See if he still just wants to hang around to talk.
     
  13. Nina L

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2018
    Messages:
    5
    All right, thank you :)
     
  14. Lexi Lovegood

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2018
    Messages:
    92
    Can I use this quote on my profile? I kind of love it.
     
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  15. MojitosJourney

    Cam Model

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2015
    Messages:
    833
    I had a member who told me on several occasions that he felt he could fall in love with me, and then minutes later on several occasions said he loved me. I'm all for love-fantasy-roleplay but it wasn't clear that's what I was doing or if he was serious. He was spending quite a bit, so after this happened a few times I told him I was uncomfortable with him telling me that he loves me, unless I know it's 100% fantasy only. He came back again, still interested, listened to my request and no longer acted super romantic and did not say I love you - and spent less money. I think he enjoyed mostly the fantasy of love, which led him to spend more, as he was getting what he desired - but morally I felt uncomfortable giving that to him in case he was serious and would get hurt.
     
  16. kimimo

    Banhammered

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2018
    Messages:
    11
    I have actually seen a model getting to move from Europe to USA to marry her clients who they met on a cam site
     
  17. AmberCutie

    AmberCutie ACF Owner & Admin. (I don't work for CB.)
    Staff Member Cam Model

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2010
    Messages:
    21,642
    More than one?
     
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  18. kimimo

    Banhammered

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2018
    Messages:
    11
    sorry just one of the clients
     
  19. Starman

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2017
    Messages:
    99
    I develop strong feelings about models, usually my regulars. I know it's not real, but its a natural reaction to sharing intimacy. Even if it is virtual, it feels intimate. And includes developing a deep closeness, if just in the moment. There are chemical physical and emotional reactions to sex - it's built into our biology. I've told models - the ones I know well - that I love them, and I mean it. But I mean friendship-type love. The models understand that.

    And, yeah, I know they are only friends because I pay them, but I'm friends with other people I pay for services/talents - my physical therapist comes to mind. We are always happy to see each other, even outside the PT office. Come to think of it, that's a relationship that also involves a lot of intimacy.
     
  20. AlbinoGator

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2018
    Messages:
    32
    If he is truly falling in love with you, if you do not have the same feelings for him, then absolutely do not encourage it. This is the kind of situation that can spiral out of control real fast. The best thing to do is just be straight up with him and tell him in no uncertain terms that it's just not a possibility. Be direct. Do not worry about his feelings. He's a grown man. He can worry about his feelings. And if he makes you uncomfortable, tell him that. Make him understand that you do not want the same thing he wants.
     

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