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MarinaThyme

Inactive Cam Model
Dec 16, 2017
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I hope I'm not the only one who's had to deal with this...

My "huzman" is very supportive of my new career choice. I talked to him before I even decided to actually start camming. He's fully on board about it as he might have a bit of a cuckold fetish going on since he says he really likes that other guys get off on me when I cam. Overall, it's made us stronger and sexier than ever but there's just one problem...

He won't stop shadowing everything I do under my model name.

He regularly reads Marina's tweets. He watches me on cam from another room. He "previews" all my uploaded content on mfcshare. He interacts with some of my members (that aren't aware they're talking to my husband) and sometimes tips a few tokens for goals.

He's always been a big fan of solo porn and camgirls, but it feels like he's almost too deep into this as if I'm not running my business alone, but he's micro-managing it for me. Is this normal?

He annoys me because he will sometimes "troll" my chat with free requests or demands. He wants to come up with my show ideas. He wants to talk about my job 24/7. He even tries to read over my shoulder when I'm on social media or whatever--which I've told him (more than once) is not okay and could be a violation of my customer's privacy. He pissed me off yesterday because I was toy shopping for work and he kept clicking on shit and telling me I should get this one or that one (when I'm clearly capable of clicking links by myself.) He seems to follow me into my camspace every single time I try to sneak in here to check emails, messages from clients, etc.

He doesn't seem to understand that I don't need him to "help" me buy toys or reply to messages. I don't need him to supervise my room and make suggestions to "make it more interesting." It almost feels like he is more interested in my work than I am sometimes... o_O

Yes, I have tried to talk to him about it but it doesn't come out right and sometimes leads to tension or awkwardness (we don't actually argue about anything like ever) which is uncomfortable for both of us.

What should I be telling him and how?
Any suggestions or relatable stories are highly appreciated!
 
Would he be okay if you hovered over him at work, micromanaging everything he did and telling him that he should buy this snack or that snack because you like it (even if he may have food allergies)? Probably not.

Just sit him down and explain to him that you don't like him watching you while you work, it's distracting and can cause issues. Buy him a video game and tell him to play that while you're working. If that doesn't work, put a region/state block on him, or ban his ass.
 
"Ban his ass" rofl.
It's so tempting!

Him in my chat-
Huzman - "Lemme see dat booty"
*15 minutes after I ignored that request*
Huzman - "Hey! Where's da booty?"
*10 minutes later a pm from his incognito premium account pops up*
"Babe, show your amazing booty and yoh will probably get way more tips!"

(Insert rage meme here)
 
In that case, treat him like you would annoying members... "Tip the correct amount for it".

Really makes one wonder how many SO's do this with their model partner. Either such as yours does, annoyingly. Or, in coordination to help moderate or earn tips.


Sorry to hear he's doing this with you...
 
In that case, treat him like you would annoying members... "Tip the correct amount for it".

Really makes one wonder how many SO's do this with their model partner. Either such as yours does, annoyingly. Or, in coordination to help moderate or earn tips.


Sorry to hear he's doing this with you...

He does it to encourage other tippers, but the free requests because he's my huzman makes annoying because he can come hand me money if he wants or see my ass whenever he wants for free. I think he doesn't realize how annoying it is and I'm not giving him special treatment. His username is a member, a regular and I will be treating him accordingly from now on.

I wanna say something like-
No tips won't shake these tips *hairflip*
But I don't want the other members to think the wrong thing or that I'm targeting them. Idk. It's just a sticky situation all around.
 
It sounds like he's not respecting you or your work. He is treating it like a game and is possibly hindering your success.

As always when someone brings up something regarding a partner, communication is key. You need to both sit down and have an adult conversation. Write down bullet points if you must and make sure he understands that this is YOUR work not his. If you don't want him in all of your work then he needs to back off even if he wasn't being an annoyingly prick about it. Do you go to his place of work and tell him how to run it.

He doesn't understand a thing about camming either. He sounds like a typical freeloader and he doesn't even realize it because he is already in a real relationship with you so when he asks he expects to get it.

When he asks for something free and you give it to him then that sets the vibe that no one has to tip to get what they want because you'll give it up for free. No respectable member who is willing to spend any amount of tokens on you is going to actually tip a model who is catering to somebody who is being rude and disrespectful and not tipping at all. Then in turn makes YOU look bad. And your hubby needs to get that through his head. On top of that, he likes what he likes but not every other member who enters your room is going to also want that. Tell him to look at it this way if he's not tipping why should you cater to him? It's up to you to set your boundaries for in your room for what you are comfortable with and for what you want to provide. Then those members who are looking for what you are providing will find you and they will tip you. However if they see him not tipping you and getting everything he wants they will pass you up in a heartbeat.

Seeing as you were ignoring his request I think you already know this. You two need to sit down and have a level-headed adult conversation together. If you are in this for the long haul he needs to know that this is not a game but instead an actual job and you must treat it that way if you are going to last. You have to take it seriously and you have to put your foot down because this is your work you're the boss not him. If you ask for advice I'm sure it would be welcome to have it from him. But he does not need to tell you how to run your room because you are perfectly capable on working your butt off and getting those tips all on your own without his help. Just because he is a man that doesnt mean he knows what all men want.


Sorry if this is rambly, I've had like 4 hours of sleep the past two nights and I'm a little bit cranky haha. But really, I bet you are awesome and I guarantee you will be able to do so much more and be so much better if he was not micromanaging your work.
 
First your SO isn't being 'supportive' in action if he's a problem while you're at work. If you just walked into his work and did whatever you wanted he'd be pissed and concerned of getting fired so why not show the same respect? I worry about your relationship if you aren't treating yourselves in an equal standing. Warn him if he's going to act like a member you'll treat him like one and make him pay for time with you all the time like a member would.

tl;dr 'supportive' is in both action and words.

And why are you writing 'huzman'? #generationgap
 
Babe, show your amazing booty and yoh will probably get way more tips!"

Literally the opposite of how it works. This dude is severely hampering your ability to make money.
 
Do you go to his job and do the same thing? would he like it? Probably not. Maybe explain it like that?

He sounds like the most un-supportive person tbh. There is no reason he can't let you do your job. Most guys dont see this as a career so maybe he is just intrigued and does not realize he is messing w/ your income.

I would ban his ass, make my twitter private and film/cam in a different room. If that did not work honestly I would dump him. Ive made an amazing living for 6 years doing this. NOBODY fucks with my income; PERIOD. That should make him understand.
 
I'd ban him or geoblock your state out. He's being incredibly disrespectful and distracting. Does he work or have any hobbies that would get him out of the house? Mr. Bonita works and spends a lot of time gaming so he's out of my hair when I'm trying to work. Maybe camming when he's not home/while he's preoccupied with something else could help. He really needs to understand that no matter how much of a fan he is of cam girls and porn he still knows nothing on the business aspect of it compared to the experience of actually being a camgirl. Camming is all about you-not him. He can seriously hold you back if he keeps disrupting you like that

I can relate on a level except I met my partner through camming and he always tipped for requests. When he moved in with me we found it was best he didn't join my room because he knows it distracts me. He loves seeing me do well and wants me to be my best. He understands that camming is all me and if I need his help whether he's taking pics of me or is a stunt cock for videos I'll ask him. Maybe involving your husband in other aspects of camming outside of live chat can be fun. Like having him take pics of you for twitter or film videos together etc
 
Suggestion. Show him this thread so he can see exactly how disrespectful he's being.

Maybe not through because then he will just show up here and follow you around like a disrespectful jerk too.
 
If he wants to have any say in how someone's cam business is run, perhaps he should hop on cam himself. :nod: That way, he can decide alllll the things.
 
I don't have anything to add that hasn't already been said. I agree that you need to explain to him that his idea of helping is actually hurting. And be firm. If he doesn't get it then he is banned from the room.

At best it sounds like he has really bad habits as a member and if he visits other models those habits should be broken for their sake as much as yours. At worst he is living out some sort of 'I have a real live camgirl in the house' type of fantasy and that also needs to be shut down fast.

Good luck.
 
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How disrespectful of him.

Communicate with him. Put it in ways he can understand. If he was at work and you came in making a scene demanding free shit/attention, he'd get in trouble, lose business, etc. He's fucking up your money. I wouldn't go straight to blocking because I understand relationships need communication with him, but if he doesn't back off, block and geoblock.
 
I honestly just think it's exciting or like a fantasy come true for him right now. I'll let down the law once things settle down a bit. (I'm currently taking a tiny break from camming due to personal stuff happening.)

I've talked it over with a few of my irl friends (that are aware what I do but don't know where online or which name) and they all said he will get bored eventually and back down. For now, I think he's just really getting in the way.

It's anxiety-provoking simply being a new model and having that gorgeous man of your dreams in your chat adds a whole new level of pressure to be perfect.

I appreciate everyone's kindness and feedback.

Naysayers- He really is an awesome man, husband (HUZMAN cuz it's fun to say in my weird brain) and father. Our relationship really is very healthy and this is actually the first major issue we have had since we met over 3 years ago lol. I truly believe he is just excited and happy for me and really thinks he's being helpful...but getting out of line and needs to step back.

Honestly, I'm all down for trading spaces hypothetically! :) He actually runs a family company. I would be very amused to see how he would react to my micormanagement of his gig.
 
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I honestly just think it's exciting or like a fantasy come true for him right now. I'll let down the law once things settle down a bit. (I'm currently taking a tiny break from camming due to personal stuff happening.)

I've talked it over with a few of my irl friends (that are aware what I do but don't know where online or which name) and they all said he will get bored eventually and back down. For now, I think he's just really getting in the way.

It's anxiety-provoking simply being a new model and having that gorgeous man of your dreams in your chat adds a whole new level of pressure to be perfect.

I appreciate everyone's kindness and feedback.

Naysayers- He really is an awesome man, husband (HUZMAN cuz it's fun to say in my weird brain) and father. Our relationship really is very healthy and this is actually the first major issue we have had since we met over 3 years ago lol. I truly believe he is just excited and happy for me and really thinks he's being helpful...but getting out of line and needs to step back.

Honestly, I'm all down for trading spaces hypothetically! :) He actually runs a family company. I would be very amused to see how he would react to my micormanagement of his gig.

I'm glad you two are happy and in a healthy relationship. All relationships hit bumps in the road, it's how you both handle it that will have the road ahead. Even if you think it's excitement that'll where off, talk with him and voice your side. Keeping it to yourself in hopes it will pass is never the best way. That always leads to someone being bitter and hurt. What if it doesn't pass and what could have been a calm discussion turn into you snapping at him which would initially turn into a fight. And if you turn this around, wouldn't you want him to let you know if you were holding him back at his work and being annoying towards him? If you brush it off he's never going on figure it out on his own. You need to spell it out for him before it turns into an actual problem.

But alas, this is your relationship and I don't know enough about either of you to really say what's best. Do what you think is best for you.
 
I'm glad you two are happy and in a healthy relationship. All relationships hit bumps in the road, it's how you both handle it that will have the road ahead. Even if you think it's excitement that'll where off, talk with him and voice your side. Keeping it to yourself in hopes it will pass is never the best way. That always leads to someone being bitter and hurt. What if it doesn't pass and what could have been a calm discussion turn into you snapping at him which would initially turn into a fight. And if you turn this around, wouldn't you want him to let you know if you were holding him back at his work and being annoying towards him? If you brush it off he's never going on figure it out on his own. You need to spell it out for him before it turns into an actual problem.

But alas, this is your relationship and I don't know enough about either of you to really say what's best. Do what you think is best for you.

I know I might sound like I'm just defending or enabling him (maybe I was in the beginning of my camming in November) but I totally get what you're all saying here.

I plan on bringing it up before I get too riled up about it. I have a habit of bringing shit up at the worst times for him and I do have to be considerate as he's going through a lot outside of this issue as well. I just hope it doesn't turn into an argument.

One of my resolutions (lame, I know) is to start being more assertive with people I love. I am a pacifist and try to avoid conflict at all costs -- even if that makes me take the burden of always letting others get their way. I'm too nice sometimes and I just want everybody I love to be happy. If my friend says they want pizza and I want burgers, I get pizza. This gets old after awhile and I really want that burger for once lol. Compromising is good, but I need to do a better job at letting my voice be heard sometimes as well.

Thanks again for all the feedback.
I think I know how to approach him now when the time is right :)
 
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I know I might sound like I'm just defending or enabling him (maybe I was in the beginning of my camming in November) but I totally get what you're all saying here.

I plan on bringing it up before I get too riled up about it. I have a habit of bringing shit up at the worst times for him and I do have to be considerate as he's going through a lot outside of this issue as well. I just hope it doesn't turn into an argument.

One of my resolutions (lame, I know) is to start being more assertive with people I love. I am a pacifist and try to avoid conflict at all costs -- even if that makes me take the burden of always letting others get their way. I'm too nice sometimes and I just want everybody I love to be happy. If my friend says they want pizza and I want burgers, I get pizza. This gets old after awhile and I really want that burger for once lol. Compromising is good, but I need to do a better job at letting my voice be heard sometimes as well.

Thanks again for all the feedback.
I think I know how to approach him now when the time is right :)
Now I'm craving pizza and burgers. Thanks a lot. :p
 
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I know I might sound like I'm just defending or enabling him (maybe I was in the beginning of my camming in November) but I totally get what you're all saying here.

I plan on bringing it up before I get too riled up about it. I have a habit of bringing shit up at the worst times for him and I do have to be considerate as he's going through a lot outside of this issue as well. I just hope it doesn't turn into an argument.

One of my resolutions (lame, I know) is to start being more assertive with people I love. I am a pacifist and try to avoid conflict at all costs -- even if that makes me take the burden of always letting others get their way. I'm too nice sometimes and I just want everybody I love to be happy. If my friend says they want pizza and I want burgers, I get pizza. This gets old after awhile and I really want that burger for once lol. Compromising is good, but I need to do a better job at letting my voice be heard sometimes as well.

Thanks again for all the feedback.
I think I know how to approach him now when the time is right :)


Eh, you sound like me about a year or so ago. It's still sometimes hard to be like "hey this is what I want/need" but with practice it gets easier. You also start to feel more confident and sure about yourself. Also you find that those who love you and care about you actually appreciate hearing what you want and need. Especially if you do what I STILL tend to do more often than not in the "I don't know/don't care it's up to you" thing. Lol some people actually DO want your opinion and to not have to make some decisions.

If he's been doing this since November and has not let up then I doubt he'll stop on his own. It's not like you have to be mean about it. But good luck with your journey of becoming more assertive :) and I hope you are able to voice your boundaries sooner than later.
 
BTW I wanted to note that in no way am I indicting you guys or questioning the strength of your marriage/trust foundation. I hope I didn't come off that way! :D
 
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I hope I'm not the only one who's had to deal with this...

My "huzman" is very supportive of my new career choice. I talked to him before I even decided to actually start camming. He's fully on board about it as he might have a bit of a cuckold fetish going on since he says he really likes that other guys get off on me when I cam. Overall, it's made us stronger and sexier than ever but there's just one problem...

He won't stop shadowing everything I do under my model name.

He regularly reads Marina's tweets. He watches me on cam from another room. He "previews" all my uploaded content on mfcshare. He interacts with some of my members (that aren't aware they're talking to my husband) and sometimes tips a few tokens for goals.

He's always been a big fan of solo porn and camgirls, but it feels like he's almost too deep into this as if I'm not running my business alone, but he's micro-managing it for me. Is this normal?

He annoys me because he will sometimes "troll" my chat with free requests or demands. He wants to come up with my show ideas. He wants to talk about my job 24/7. He even tries to read over my shoulder when I'm on social media or whatever--which I've told him (more than once) is not okay and could be a violation of my customer's privacy. He pissed me off yesterday because I was toy shopping for work and he kept clicking on shit and telling me I should get this one or that one (when I'm clearly capable of clicking links by myself.) He seems to follow me into my camspace every single time I try to sneak in here to check emails, messages from clients, etc.

He doesn't seem to understand that I don't need him to "help" me buy toys or reply to messages. I don't need him to supervise my room and make suggestions to "make it more interesting." It almost feels like he is more interested in my work than I am sometimes... o_O

Yes, I have tried to talk to him about it but it doesn't come out right and sometimes leads to tension or awkwardness (we don't actually argue about anything like ever) which is uncomfortable for both of us.

What should I be telling him and how?
Any suggestions or relatable stories are highly appreciated!

I can only offer my perspective...well, obviously. I am straight and very happily married. I began camming largely due to my erratic schedule as a full-time MBA student and business owner. Finances were tough, and my wife is my world. I have always had a rather bohemian perspective regarding sex and am an avid proponent of sex-positive culture.

That said, when I began camming, it was a mutual decision between my wife and me. We discussed and agreed upon boundaries, expectations, and means of communication (this last bit is perhaps most applicable to you - more on that in a moment). I abide by our agreement absolutely. The second I violate said agreement, I have violated my marriage...which defeats the whole point in starting camming/modeling in the first place, given that I do it to support my family through this 'odd' transitional period in life.

So, about communication. My wife and I thought it prudent to agree on just *how much* I share with her about my work. My niche is predominantly gay men, and more specific, submissive gay men. We agreed that she doesn't need to (or want to) hear every little detail, or see the pictures of me with my ass in the air, or hear me bossing guys around on cam, etc. We are able to do this because we had first established a strong marriage founded on absolute trust - she knows (and I do, too) that I will never violate the boundaries we set up in the first place.

It sounds like your s/o is violating your initial expectations/agreement by fetishizing and sexualizing what you do. I am a firm believer that in this line of work, it largely needs to be kept separate from your personal life. Our work can be very psychologically demanding - we need to be able to have fun, but also ensure it does not interfere with our personal sexual sensibilities. That your s/o is trying to get involved complicates this.

I recommend expressing to him what you have shared with us, but firmly and directly. Don't make this open for discussion: either he respects the boundaries you initially outlined, or you guys need to go back to the initial 'drawing board' and reassess those boundaries.

I personally think this stuff should be kept separate from one's marriage entirely, sans the initial agreements made. It can still enrich your marriage - it certainly has for me, knowing my wife is so incredibly supportive by trusting me and giving me the space and privacy I need to do my work. I check in with her regularly and always tell her if something comes up (like a girl PMing me, which is a no-no for us).

Anyway, I'm rambling. Point is, you need to enumerate your boundaries and expectations to your husband, or at least come to a mutual agreement. Once you do that, there can be no miscommunication. I really hope this advice helps. Best to you guys!

-Tex
 
I can only offer my perspective...well, obviously. I am straight and very happily married. I began camming largely due to my erratic schedule as a full-time MBA student and business owner. Finances were tough, and my wife is my world. I have always had a rather bohemian perspective regarding sex and am an avid proponent of sex-positive culture.

That said, when I began camming, it was a mutual decision between my wife and me. We discussed and agreed upon boundaries, expectations, and means of communication (this last bit is perhaps most applicable to you - more on that in a moment). I abide by our agreement absolutely. The second I violate said agreement, I have violated my marriage...which defeats the whole point in starting camming/modeling in the first place, given that I do it to support my family through this 'odd' transitional period in life.

So, about communication. My wife and I thought it prudent to agree on just *how much* I share with her about my work. My niche is predominantly gay men, and more specific, submissive gay men. We agreed that she doesn't need to (or want to) hear every little detail, or see the pictures of me with my ass in the air, or hear me bossing guys around on cam, etc. We are able to do this because we had first established a strong marriage founded on absolute trust - she knows (and I do, too) that I will never violate the boundaries we set up in the first place.

It sounds like your s/o is violating your initial expectations/agreement by fetishizing and sexualizing what you do. I am a firm believer that in this line of work, it largely needs to be kept separate from your personal life. Our work can be very psychologically demanding - we need to be able to have fun, but also ensure it does not interfere with our personal sexual sensibilities. That your s/o is trying to get involved complicates this.

I recommend expressing to him what you have shared with us, but firmly and directly. Don't make this open for discussion: either he respects the boundaries you initially outlined, or you guys need to go back to the initial 'drawing board' and reassess those boundaries.

I personally think this stuff should be kept separate from one's marriage entirely, sans the initial agreements made. It can still enrich your marriage - it certainly has for me, knowing my wife is so incredibly supportive by trusting me and giving me the space and privacy I need to do my work. I check in with her regularly and always tell her if something comes up (like a girl PMing me, which is a no-no for us).

Anyway, I'm rambling. Point is, you need to enumerate your boundaries and expectations to your husband, or at least come to a mutual agreement. Once you do that, there can be no miscommunication. I really hope this advice helps. Best to you guys!

-Tex

Your perspective is so valuable here so I really appreciate your reply so much! I really admire how you and your wife go about these things.

I do have an update for you guys!

I did talk to my husband about this stuff a few nights ago and he is now on the same page with me (finally) after I just explained that his random feedback puts me under more pressure than I need even though I know his intentions are purely out of love and trying to help. I gave him some examples that he could relate to and it seemed to help him understand that I'm not trying to be sneaky about anything, it just makes me super nervous when he's in my room posing as a member in the chat because I am biased to him which is not good for business at all.

Hopefully, when I get back on cam, he will follow through with giving me my space and only giving feedback when I ask for it.
 
Your perspective is so valuable here so I really appreciate your reply so much! I really admire how you and your wife go about these things.

I do have an update for you guys!

I did talk to my husband about this stuff a few nights ago and he is now on the same page with me (finally) after I just explained that his random feedback puts me under more pressure than I need even though I know his intentions are purely out of love and trying to help. I gave him some examples that he could relate to and it seemed to help him understand that I'm not trying to be sneaky about anything, it just makes me super nervous when he's in my room posing as a member in the chat because I am biased to him which is not good for business at all.

Hopefully, when I get back on cam, he will follow through with giving me my space and only giving feedback when I ask for it.

No problem - glad to help!

This is really great to hear. It sounds like you clearly and honestly articulated to your husband your needs and did your best to intimate to him the "why" behind them (which is crucial here). That was undoubtedly the responsible and respectful thing to do.

I didn't think to mention this, but I do experience the same anxieties as you regarding camming in front of my wife, just with a slightly different context. We coordinate our work hours so that I cam whenever she isn't home. I perform exponentially better with absolute privacy and tend to be a bit too conscious of myself when she is around. Not to mention, I can't stop thinking about how she is right there and I just want to hang out with her!

When I broadcast, I am 'in character', and it can be difficult to do that around someone you know and love so intimately. Additionally - as you noted - part of your 'job' is to attend to your fans/viewers. I can totally understand the quandary of your want to pay attention to the man you love superseding anonymous viewers. Just another reason why camming shouldn't be incorporated into your personal sex-life...at least not directly.

I hope everything works out - I trust that he will respect your needs and abide by what you've requested of him. You did mention a cuckolding fetish in your OP; if he feels like he is 'missing out' by not participating in your camshows, perhaps you could compromise by telling him all about it. In fact, with a lot of cuckold fetishists, the notion of hearing about it and not being there can be quite alluring.

Best to you guys!
 
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I hope everything works out - I trust that he will respect your needs and abide by what you've requested of him. You did mention a cuckolding fetish in your OP; if he feels like he is 'missing out' by not participating in your camshows, perhaps you could compromise by telling him all about it. In fact, with a lot of cuckold fetishists, the notion of hearing about it and not being there can be quite alluring.

Best to you guys!

This is half of the reason he wanted to be so involved to begin with. He has agreed to settle for viewing on guest so I'm not distracted (guests are muted in my chat) and he can still ... well you can probably imagine what he does when I'm sexually entertaining on cam lol. He's understanding that I cannot tell him anything about my clients, to protect their privacy. He also sees now that this is more than exhibitionism to turn him on--it is my JOB.

He is excited to be able to help me create content, too :) he has freedom to view my content on my laptop whenever he wants (as long as I'm not using the laptop obviously) so he's happy that he can still see as many elements of my work as anybody paying for it can. He is coming up with some ideas for videos with me and tries to help with taking my photo.

All in all, I think we have resolved the situation now that I finally spoke up about it when I had the right words in mind.

Thanks ACF! ♡♡♡
 
Geoblock is what I did so my wife can't see me. It is a great idea ;)
I'd ban him or geoblock your state out. He's being incredibly disrespectful and distracting. Does he work or have any hobbies that would get him out of the house? Mr. Bonita works and spends a lot of time gaming so he's out of my hair when I'm trying to work. Maybe camming when he's not home/while he's preoccupied with something else could help. He really needs to understand that no matter how much of a fan he is of cam girls and porn he still knows nothing on the business aspect of it compared to the experience of actually being a camgirl. Camming is all about you-not him. He can seriously hold you back if he keeps disrupting you like that

I can relate on a level except I met my partner through camming and he always tipped for requests. When he moved in with me we found it was best he didn't join my room because he knows it distracts me. He loves seeing me do well and wants me to be my best. He understands that camming is all me and if I need his help whether he's taking pics of me or is a stunt cock for videos I'll ask him. Maybe involving your husband in other aspects of camming outside of live chat can be fun. Like having him take pics of you for twitter or film videos together etc
 
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