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Where do i go from here (regarding a cam girl i like)

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Azor87

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So this started about 2 years ago when I found this girls room on CB. She was super friendly and new to cam and didnt do any nudity wich I was fine with. So I saw her 5 times that week spend about 9 hours in private and another like 7 hours just in her room talking in public and PM. So this continued for about 1 year and we grew pretty close. She the quit the studio she worked at and started from home after 1 month or so.we continued to talk on another platform where we had long talks everyday and also privates i paid for ofcourse. So at around november she totally dissapeared. And in januar she had made a onlyfans and invited me to it. So we talked both on OF and the other app. She sendt me random pics and videos from her life and she sendt naughty pics and videos i would pay for. We then started doing private shows i paid for again in februar. So we did this until march. Then things felt like it evolved and she told me she didnt want me to send her money. Wich felt a bit weird, but she got upset if I did send. So we kept doing privates wich I now got free. And around 2 weeks ago she asked me if I would like for her to come visit me. Wich ofcourse tok me by surprise, I said ofcourse I would love that so she said she is coming in 3 months. Then one night like 4 days ago she said the L word by mistake or maybe not mistake. But we where talking and it happened. As u probably can understand my feelings for her where at that point to, so I said ut back to her and she seemed so genuinly happy. And just to make it clear, u have never tried to press her boundaries, never asked to meet, never asked where she lives or her real name. She have given me all this by her self. So my question is, should i let her come to me and meet? Has this happened to anyone ells here. I mean I couldnt be happier on how things have gone so far.
 
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So im in norway and she is in russia, and no she has never pulled a trick like that on me. Iv paid for our time together in the past like I should. But nothing other than that.
 
PeterBland said:
Has she seen you on cam and spoken by phone?
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Yes we always use c2c and audio, we use a app called viber cus it has translate option and she doesent read or write english that good. She does speak english ok
 
Idk dude. If she visits, have her stay at a hotel 🤷‍♀️
 
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Azor87 said:
Yes we always use c2c and audio, we use a app called viber cus it has translate option and she doesent read or write english that good. She does speak english ok
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I don't know much about love but it could be fun to see what happens with her. One thing that could go wrong is that you send her money for her travel and then she doesn't show up. Plenty of guys caught out by that before.
 
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PeterBland said:
I don't know much about love but it could be fun to see what happens with her. One thing that could go wrong is that you send her money for her travel and then she doesn't show up. Plenty of guys caught out by that before.
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Ofcourse iv gone through everything i can think of that could happen. But after she didnt want money from me for cam2cams and stuff like that. I mean I cant remeber a single time in those 2 years she has asked for money. She has complained sometimes that she has little money but never asked me for money, only said that me beeing around makes it easier.
 
But yes if she starts asking for money ill know something is up
 
Azor87 said:
Ofcourse iv gone through everything i can think of that could happen. But after she didnt want money from me for cam2cams and stuff like that. I mean I cant remeber a single time in those 2 years she has asked for money. She has complained sometimes that she has little money but never asked me for money, only said that me beeing around makes it easier.
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If she is Colombian, consider that it would not be unusual for her to have a (broke) boyfriend her own age, children; and a couple of older guys who spend money on her from time to time. Consider that you might be going towards that kind of relationship, ie not monogamous but not entirely a scam either.

I would ask myself how much more attractive is she than me, and how much older am I than her.
 
PeterBland said:
If she is Colombian, consider that it would not be unusual for her to have a (broke) boyfriend her own age, children; and a couple of older guys who spend money on her from time to time. Consider that you might be going towards that kind of relationship, ie not monogamous but not entirely a scam either.

I would ask myself how much more attractive is she than me, and how much older am I than her.
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Well she is 29 and im 34, she isent Columbia but russian and she has no kids. Atleast she huden the kid well as iv been on cam with her in her apartment going around the whole thing while talking. And dont think its a fake apartment as she is there morning midday and night. Im orolly gonne just see how ot goes when we near her coming to me. Maybe I worry to much.
 
Azor87 said:
Well she is 29 and im 34, she isent Columbia but russian and she has no kids. Atleast she huden the kid well as iv been on cam with her in her apartment going around the whole thing while talking. And dont think its a fake apartment as she is there morning midday and night. Im orolly gonne just see how ot goes when we near her coming to me. Maybe I worry to much.
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My assumptions were wrong, it seems an appropriate age gap! For sure there have been men scammed by Russian women, but success stories as well.
 
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AudriTwo said:
Because she is a stranger.
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Also, if there is a genuine attraction, take some of the pressure and sex out of it by being able to "retreat" from each other at the end of the day. Take time (for both of you) to regroup, instead of trying to force something. Let's say she is planning to come for a week, the hotel arrangement may last a couple of days or the whole week.

If you are contributing money for the visit then, then only spend what you are comfortable losing.

Assuming she arrives as promised (and hopefully is sounds that way), then it could go in many different directions.
  • May be obvious it isn't going to work and she runs off back to Russia
  • May be no sexual chemistry in person, but you strengthen the friendship and have fun sightseeing
  • May be genuine interest with mutual feeling and that can go anywhere
What I would say is that if it looks like the relationship isn't going to work out the way you planned. don't abandon her to manage on her own (unless that is what she wants). She'll be in a strange country and doesn't speak the language (apart from basic English by the sound of it). Things probably cost 5 x more than they do in Russia. If she makes the effort to come to you, make the effort to make sure she has a good visit with what is within your control.

Also you will find the language barrier will be frustrating and you will be relying on apps all the time to communicate. That in itself will be a strain. Just reread that she speaks English okay, so you use viber to translate what you write to each other?
I chat on Insta with a Russian model. One day she video called me out of the blue (on Insta). So no translation service happening. She says hello, I say hello. We look at each other stupidly for about 30 seconds then we hang up! Last time that happened! lol.

I hope it works out, or at least you make/keep a good friend.
 
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Billyboy said:
Also, if there is a genuine attraction, take some of the pressure and sex out of it by being able to "retreat" from each other at the end of the day. Take time (for both of you) to regroup, instead of trying to force something. Let's say she is planning to come for a week, the hotel arrangement may last a couple of days or the whole week.

If you are contributing money for the visit then, then only spend what you are comfortable losing.

Assuming she arrives as promised (and hopefully is sounds that way), then it could go in many different directions.
  • May be obvious it isn't going to work and she runs off back to Russia
  • May be no sexual chemistry in person, but you strengthen the friendship and have fun sightseeing
  • May be genuine interest with mutual feeling and that can go anywhere
What I would say is that if it looks like the relationship isn't going to work out the way you planned. don't abandon her to manage on her own (unless that is what she wants). She'll be in a strange country and doesn't speak the language (apart from basic English by the sound of it). Things probably cost 5 x more than they do in Russia. If she makes the effort to come to you, make the effort to make sure she has a good visit with what is within your control.

Also you will find the language barrier will be frustrating and you will be relying on apps all the time to communicate. That in itself will be a strain. Just reread that she speaks English okay, so you use viber to translate what you write to each other?
I chat on Insta with a Russian model. One day she video called me out of the blue (on Insta). So no translation service happening. She says hello, I say hello. We look at each other stupidly for about 30 seconds then we hang up! Last time that happened! lol.

I hope it works out, or at least you make/keep a good friend.
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Many good points Billy, ye we use viber when we text, wich is from morning to night everyday. And ye if I dont feel it when she is here i wouldnt just leave her be in a strange country. I'd still like to have her as my friend if the sexual chemestry isent there. Atleast we tried then and we know.
 
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But ye so im gonna be like I have with her all the time and not pressure her in any way. She seems to like that its on her terms and im fine with that.
 
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Azor87 said:
And around 2 weeks ago she asked me if I would like for her to come visit me.
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IDK about this, i can't find any motivation (except love) why she would come over, so i can only say be careful and try to find out if there is a motivation behind it. if it is marriage, what you will notice very soon, than i'm afraid it is a "trap" to become a scandinavian citizen. I don't say it is wrong i just advise you to figure out where the priorities lie, to become married or to come visit you because she loves you...

That's all I have to say, I wish you all the luck in world with or without her.
 
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nightwish said:
IDK about this, i can't find any motivation (except love) why she would come over, so i can only say be careful and try to find out if there is a motivation behind it. if it is marriage, what you will notice very soon, than i'm afraid it is a "trap" to become a scandinavian citizen. I don't say it is wrong i just advise you to figure out where the priorities lie, to become married or to come visit you because she loves you...

That's all I have to say, I wish you all the luck in world with or without her.
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So first thing I want to say is, even if we say the word love to eachother. I take it more as affection than actual love. Cant really love someone you havent met. You can get strong feelings for her. And I do have strong feelings for her. As the first thing I think about when I wake up is her and the last thing I think of before bed is her. But true actual love is something different. So I understand that, we will see I will update here if and when something more happens.
 
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It is also a good thing to educate yourself about the topic of “limerence” which can happen to most people in a similar situation such as yours. There are many YouTube about how limerence is different from love. I recommend watching this video with an open mind.

 
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