Spring cleaning of your friends list

[bawksy]

There's a lot of turnaround on MFC. Both models and members can come and go unexpectedly. It's also not uncommon for people to take a several-months-long sabbatical before coming back to MFC. So when someone on your friends list hasn't signed on to MFC in quite a while, where do you draw the line on declaring them a lost cause?

I generally clean out my friends list once every three months, but I don't have a specific criteria for getting rid of people who haven't been on in a while. I do a "Order by Least Recently Logged In", and then consider for deletion the people who have been away the longest. If there is a model I really like(d), sometimes I will leave her there on my friends list for quite a while just in case she might ever come back.

Are there any people on your friends list who haven't been online in forever, but who you can't bring yourself to delete?

Pic related.

 

[Bocefish]

I just wait until it's full to the point where I can't add anymore people before culling the list.

 

[AmberCutie]

HAHA!! :lol: Oh gawd, I gave up on TaterTotty forever and a day ago. Thus is the life of a camgirl though. Someone will come on one day, and stick around for a few hours, a few days, a few weeks, and rock your socks off in multiple ways, then just DISAPPEAR. Like, fuckin POOF! Gone.

I clean out my friend list pretty often these days. There are a few people who haven't logged on in a while, or HAVE and just haven't visited me, that I won't delete just due to history.

Beaucoupfish and Futurefrank are 2 that come to mind. I can see they've been online recently, but haven't heard from them in, what, a year? I kinda go WTF, but leave them there just in case they decide I am once again worth a holla.

But in general, I really hate to see a whole slew of "friends" on my list, ONLINE, but not visiting me. It's kinda like a slap in the face, so to speak. If someone has earned a spot on my list, then I don't hear from them for weeks, but still see them online, they'll probably be removed just to save my wondering "why aren't they hanging with me today?" I know that sounds all butthurt and emo, but that's how my mind works with my friend list. If I put you there, I like you, and want you to visit. So if you don't, I must delete to save my own feelings from being hurt.

 

[Evvie]

Occasionally I'll get bored and delete everyone off my friendslist, excepting some models.

If you pick and choose who gets to stay and go, you're going to end up with guys staying around forever who are never really around and other guys you cut off but who are pretty cool.

If you delete everyone, only people who are active or who come back and make another cool impression will get back on.

(Amber said the rest better than me - even if a guy is cool, and around, sometimes he never comes to hang out again. Sometimes it's better to just start off fresh so you can focus on members who are your friends or who are active and about)

 

[AllisonWilder]

I actually just cleaned about 40 people from my friends list tonight. The only way onto my list is to be awesome, so it's sad that I had to give 'em the boot.

 

[ComicOzzie]

Back when I was young and foolish, I hung out in the lounge all day, and I would friend any model who looked halfway cute. Eventually, I had over 1,500 models friended, 99% of whom I had never actually visited or spoken to. I have since culled my list significantly and am now down to a more reasonable 500 or so.

:lol:

 

[Anonymous]

I really hate to see a whole slew of "friends" on my list, ONLINE, but not visiting me. It's kinda like a slap in the face, so to speak. If someone has earned a spot on my list, then I don't hear from them for weeks, but still see them online, they'll probably be removed just to save my wondering "why aren't they hanging with me today?"

This is EXACTLY how I feel about it.

And then when they finally return to my room, the first thing they do is ask why it's not letting them PM me. Lol.


Cool thread, bawksy.

 

[Mirra]

I do a "Order by Least Recently Logged In", and then consider for deletion the people who have been away the longest.

Good call. I didn't have many people on my friends list anyhow but this helped me work it down to 70. It seems I had one model who doesn't exist anymore from waaaaay back and a few people on friends who I'd added because they wanted to PM me to ask questions or something.

 

[AliciaLeigh]

A few weeks ago I went through my friends list and deleted about 50+ members. My cut off was anyone who hadn't logged on since last summer (2011) or anyone that had logged on since then but doesn't visit. I'm with Amber on this one. If I add someone and I see them log in every day but they don't come to visit then I get to wondering why they're even on my friends list. I don't mind them hanging out with other models, but a "Hello" every once in a while would be nice. If I'm not worth a couple minutes of their time every few weeks then they're removed.

I've deleted a few members that have come back recently to visit and I was happy to add them back when they asked. Now, if they don't visit again for another couple months I'll delete them again.

 

[Just Me]

Since it has come up a couple of times in this thread, I have a question. When you are wondering about why a "friend" has not returned to your room or said anything, have you PMed them and they just ignored you?

With actual friends, and maybe I am different in this respect, if it is always me initiating contact, I will eventually get the impression they really do not want to talk to me. I treat MFC "friends" the same way, with some caveats due to the nature of MFC. I know models are busy, I know a member might be "busy" :lol: and maybe the etiquette or sensibilities of some models means they wont PM a "friend" that is not in their room. I look at it as a two way street whether they are truly friends or just a business relationship.

 

[CallMeWilliam]

Since it has come up a couple of times in this thread, I have a question. When you are wondering about why a "friend" has not returned to your room or said anything, have you PMed them and they just ignored you?

With actual friends, and maybe I am different in this respect, if it is always me initiating contact, I will eventually get the impression they really do not want to talk to me. I treat MFC "friends" the same way, with some caveats due to the nature of MFC. I know models are busy, I know a member might be "busy" :lol: and maybe the etiquette or sensibilities of some models means they wont PM a "friend" that is not in their room. I look at it as a two way street whether they are truly friends or just a business relationship.

You are not different in this respect. I base my true friendships on this way as well. Friendship is a two way street and driving one way always gets tedious and unfulfilling after awhile.

 

[AliciaLeigh]

Since it has come up a couple of times in this thread, I have a question. When you are wondering about why a "friend" has not returned to your room or said anything, have you PMed them and they just ignored you?

With actual friends, and maybe I am different in this respect, if it is always me initiating contact, I will eventually get the impression they really do not want to talk to me. I treat MFC "friends" the same way, with some caveats due to the nature of MFC. I know models are busy, I know a member might be "busy" :lol: and maybe the etiquette or sensibilities of some models means they wont PM a "friend" that is not in their room. I look at it as a two way street whether they are truly friends or just a business relationship.

You are not different in this respect. I base my true friendships on this way as well. Friendship is a two way street and driving one way always gets tedious and unfulfilling after awhile.

You both make an excellent point about real friendships and how they're applied to MFC and other cam sites. In "real life" I contact my friends frequently to see what's going on in their lives. However, in the cam world it's a little different because not everyone on my friends list is a friend. My friends list consists of many kinds of members: members who just wanted to chat before a private, members who tipped to get on my friends list but who've only used it a handful of times, and members who visit and chat on a regular basis. Also, I have a lot of regulars who rarely use PMs and prefer to talk in my chatroom but I still keep them on my friends list. I also have regulars that rarely, if ever, talk in my chatroom and only use PM. It really runs the full spectrum.

I think the point of this thread was how do we address removing people on our friends list. I can honestly say that the majority of people on my friends list are complete strangers to me so I have no problem removing them if they haven't logged on in 6+ months or if I don't recognize their screen name. Some of them either took me private once and never returned or maybe they just don't hang around or check in very often, so I don't even know what I would say if I initiated contact. It would probably be a weird exchange. While I do care about the lives of my regulars, my friends list consists of over 500 people and I can't see myself e-mailing all of them just to check in the way I do with my "real life" friends.

Just my :twocents-02cents:

 

[Shaun__]

my friends list consists of over 500 people and I can't see myself e-mailing all of them just to check in the way I do with my "real life" friends.

You do not have to bother emailing me, I am all good. Unless I was one of the people you culled, then you are a big meanie :angry-cussingblack:

 

[GemmaMarie]

By general rule of thumb for me right now is that when I clean out my friends list- If I remember you, remember that I liked your company, you may stay. Regardless of how long it's been since you've signed on. If I don't remember you, or remember your an annoying little turd face- you get deleted. There have been some people who were quieter regulars once upon a time who have been deleted, & as soon as I remember them in chat I'll add them back no questions asked.

 

[MadisonLeigh]

I just cleaned out my friends list, inspired by this thread. I removed anyone who hasn't logged in in over 3 months, and anyone who hasn't tipped in a long time. ("A long time" is relative based on how often they're in my chat) It felt pretty refreshing to clear it all out.

 

[Just Me]

Since it has come up a couple of times in this thread, I have a question. When you are wondering about why a "friend" has not returned to your room or said anything, have you PMed them and they just ignored you?

With actual friends, and maybe I am different in this respect, if it is always me initiating contact, I will eventually get the impression they really do not want to talk to me. I treat MFC "friends" the same way, with some caveats due to the nature of MFC. I know models are busy, I know a member might be "busy" :lol: and maybe the etiquette or sensibilities of some models means they wont PM a "friend" that is not in their room. I look at it as a two way street whether they are truly friends or just a business relationship.

You are not different in this respect. I base my true friendships on this way as well. Friendship is a two way street and driving one way always gets tedious and unfulfilling after awhile.

You both make an excellent point about real friendships and how they're applied to MFC and other cam sites. In "real life" I contact my friends frequently to see what's going on in their lives. However, in the cam world it's a little different because not everyone on my friends list is a friend. My friends list consists of many kinds of members: members who just wanted to chat before a private, members who tipped to get on my friends list but who've only used it a handful of times, and members who visit and chat on a regular basis. Also, I have a lot of regulars who rarely use PMs and prefer to talk in my chatroom but I still keep them on my friends list. I also have regulars that rarely, if ever, talk in my chatroom and only use PM. It really runs the full spectrum.

I think the point of this thread was how do we address removing people on our friends list. I can honestly say that the majority of people on my friends list are complete strangers to me so I have no problem removing them if they haven't logged on in 6+ months or if I don't recognize their screen name. Some of them either took me private once and never returned or maybe they just don't hang around or check in very often, so I don't even know what I would say if I initiated contact. It would probably be a weird exchange. While I do care about the lives of my regulars, my friends list consists of over 500 people and I can't see myself e-mailing all of them just to check in the way I do with my "real life" friends.

Just my :twocents-02cents:

I certainly understand this, and expected many on "friends" list are there for MFC reasons.

If I add someone and I see them log in every day but they don't come to visit then I get to wondering why they're even on my friends list. I don't mind them hanging out with other models, but a "Hello" every once in a while would be nice. If I'm not worth a couple minutes of their time every few weeks then they're removed.

But, mainly I was replying to this sentiment. Maybe a hello once in a while is all they need as well. :-D

 

[AmberCutie]

If I add someone and I see them log in every day but they don't come to visit then I get to wondering why they're even on my friends list. I don't mind them hanging out with other models, but a "Hello" every once in a while would be nice. If I'm not worth a couple minutes of their time every few weeks then they're removed.

But, mainly I was replying to this sentiment. Maybe a hello once in a while is all they need as well. :-D

I dunno, sometimes when a camsite "friend" disappears for a period of time, it's hard to determine if they would want a random greeting out of the blue. I leave it to them usually to make re-contact or just assume they're done with me/moved on to the next model on the homepage.

 

[MadisonLeigh]

If I add someone and I see them log in every day but they don't come to visit then I get to wondering why they're even on my friends list. I don't mind them hanging out with other models, but a "Hello" every once in a while would be nice. If I'm not worth a couple minutes of their time every few weeks then they're removed.

But, mainly I was replying to this sentiment. Maybe a hello once in a while is all they need as well. :-D

I dunno, sometimes when a camsite "friend" disappears for a period of time, it's hard to determine if they would want a random greeting out of the blue. I leave it to them usually to make re-contact or just assume they're done with me/moved on to the next model on the homepage.

Me too. Sometimes I've thought about saying hi to people, but some members on this forum have mentioned that they dislike unsolicited PMs from a model, so I don't make the first move to contact anyone anymore.

 

[mynameisbob84]

Yeah, it sounds horrible but if a member's not been to visit a model in six months, then they've probably "moved on".
And I can't speak for other guys, but being PM'd by models whose room I'm not in CAN be (though doesn't have to be) a little annoying. I mean, if they have something they wanna tall me, that's cool. But I have models who must have added me to their friends list (they're not on mine) after I went in their room that one time four months ago, and they still try to talk to me in PM when I'm in another girl's room. I can't keep track of two conversations AND naked boobs at the same time, ya know?
I think you have to assess internet friendships and in partuicualr, MFC freindships much differently than you do real life friendships. Logistically, I think it has to rest on the member to initiate conversation. Members have maybe 20 models in their friends list (I'm guessing) and are free to go visit their model friends whenever they please. Models have maybe 500 members in their friends list (I'm guessing) and have no say over when their member freinds visit them :twocents-02cents:

 

[mynameisbob84]

Also, I'm digging the blonde hair, Madison. As the kids today say, RAWR

 

[AmberCutie]

Also, I'm digging the blonde hair, Madison. As the kids today say, RAWR

Me too!

 

[Deleted member 565]

I haven't culled my friends list since I started MFC.....which was almost two years ago, I have a lot of friends who are incredibly awesome but only come on every so often and when they do I don't want them to feel like I've just abandoned them but I think it's about time that I cleaned things up a little bit! Off I go! Wish me luck!

 

[bud9752]

Me too. Sometimes I've thought about saying hi to people, but some members on this forum have mentioned that they dislike unsolicited PMs from a model, so I don't make the first move to contact anyone anymore.

I believe most members (exceptions to every rule) who say they dislike unsolicited PM's from models are referring to models that they have never been in their rooms and do not "know" anything about and receive a PM saying "Hi come to my room", a member that has been to your room and has interacted with you may not take a PM from you as being "unsolicted" . However, all members are different and may do so, so you may have to take it with a grain of salt if they don't appreciate your PM and just let it go. :twocents-02cents:

 

[curvyredhead]

I've always cleared out my Perv name every 3 or 4 months. This thread inspired me to clear out my model name. Thanx

 

[LadyLuna]

Back when I was on MFC, every six months or so I'd go through the friend's list and think "when was the last time I heard from them?" Then think "how much do I want to remember they exist?" There are a few who earned a permanent spot on my friend's list.

I noticed, though, that clearing them out of my friends list does not clear them out of the mfc mail friend's list. So once you're on my friend's list once, I can send you an mfc mail without much trouble forever after.

I suck at multitasking, so I always end up ignoring pm's anyway. Due to this, when I log back in, I plan on clearing my friend's list completely, leaving pm open, but having a message along the lines of "I'm sorry, but I tend to ignore pm's. Tip notes will be read now, mfc mail read when I take a break."

Edit to add: I rarely initiate contact, even with real life friends. I warn people about this when they say they want to be my friend, and tell them that just because I'm not initiating contact doesn't mean I don't want to hear from them. When I don't want to hear from people, I don't pay attention to the communication lines, and pick them back up when I feel like being social again.

I AM AN INTROVERT. No matter what I seem like on camera, I need my away-from-the-world time.

 

[AliciaLeigh]

my friends list consists of over 500 people and I can't see myself e-mailing all of them just to check in the way I do with my "real life" friends.

You do not have to bother emailing me, I am all good. Unless I was one of the people you culled, then you are a big meanie :angry-cussingblack:

You're still on my friends list.

 

[sweetiebatman]

I think im a bit of a hoarder with my friends list, I rarely ever delete models, theres some on there that aint been on cam for over a year, I think im just scared i'd miss out if they ever came back :lol:

 

[UncleThursday]

I think im a bit of a hoarder with my friends list, I rarely ever delete models, theres some on there that aint been on cam for over a year, I think im just scared i'd miss out if they ever came back :lol:

Same for me. Though I did go through and delete a few models who hadn't been on in a long time (year plus).

The only issue is if you put a friend on who works for a studio... Often you'll see the name pop up and it will be a different girl. The studio just uses the other account with a new girl after the other one leaves. I even saw this with one non-studio girl that I had added to take private when I had the money and we were both on. She disappeared for a few months, the name popped back and I was all excited (I had tokens and we were both online)... then saw it was a completely different girl on cam. I mean completely different... face, height, body type... the only thing the same was the fact that they were both British, but even the voices weren't the same. I guess she sold her account to someone else or something, I have no clue.

Then there's also the few who you have on for a long time, talk to, etc. And then out of nowhere they seem to disappear, and they delete their profiles. And the only way you realize is you look on your friends list and their model names/profile pics aren't there. :crybaby:

 

[RogueWarrior]

Eh, my friends list never gets outta control. Usually 30 max. I never do a mass cleaning. Just someone will pop up online and I'm thinking "who the hell is this? Oh, yeah, the other night. Hmm, probably not going back. Remove from list."

I also have it set where only friends list can PM me. So I never get the random PMs that others are talking about. I don't mind a random PM from someone on my list.

Working in professional kitchens a good portion of my life, I'm a "clean as you go" type of guy. I don't hang on to people on friends list unnecessarily.

 

[Dreezy]

There's a lot of turnaround on MFC. Both models and members can come and go unexpectedly. It's also not uncommon for people to take a several-months-long sabbatical before coming back to MFC. So when someone on your friends list hasn't signed on to MFC in quite a while, where do you draw the line on declaring them a lost cause?

I generally clean out my friends list once every three months, but I don't have a specific criteria for getting rid of people who haven't been on in a while. I do a "Order by Least Recently Logged In", and then consider for deletion the people who have been away the longest. If there is a model I really like(d), sometimes I will leave her there on my friends list for quite a while just in case she might ever come back.

Are there any people on your friends list who haven't been online in forever, but who you can't bring yourself to delete?

Pic related.

Do you happen to know of a way to mass PM members on your friends list? Send one PM, rather then sending one to each person separately?