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Dating a camgirl. What boundaries are appropiate? Am I wrong for feeling this way?

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Oct 31, 2020
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Ok so! I know there are ALOT of posts about this but I think mine is unique enough that it merits a separate post. So I've been "dating" this camgirl for a month and things were going great. We had the boyfriend/girlfriend talk and we set some pretty clear boundaries. She, of her own accord set the boundary that she would never tell viewers things like "my love" "I think about you"(in a non sexual way IE like you just popped into my head and I miss you) etc. And great, I trusted her word and was happy with this boundary.

Now the other day a long time viewer pops in and she goes "Oh my love is here" and she LIT UP. Then when he was leaving she goes "Write to me later, don't let anything stop you. I think about you, I think about you all day" and there I was feeling completely and absolutely devastated and betrayed. That was literally THE boundary and she broke it. When I confronted her about it she said she only said it because her job requires it. Am I wrong for not being ok with this? Am I right to be upset and feel angry and betrayed? If she lied to me about not saying this to anyone else, what else is she lying about? There's also the fact that past her saying I'm her boyfriend she does nothing to make me FEEL this way. Outside of her camming we only talk a few minutes at night before she goes to sleep if at all and yet she's up late at night online posting pictures and talking to who knows. No one in her personal knows about me in ANY way and she refuses to budge on this and her own mother knows she's a camgirl. And we literally have no sexual intimacy outside of work, or personal for that matter.

My question is, should I be ok with this? Am I being unreasonable or dramatic for feeling hurt and betrayed? Am I being unreasonable for feeling like I'm not being treated like a boyfriend at all given we have no kind of intimacy or acknowledgement outside of work? I'd really like a model's opinion and please be brutally honest. If I'm being a jerk and unreasonable I will go apologize to this lady immediately.
 
Ok so! I know there are ALOT of posts about this but I think mine is unique enough that it merits a separate post. So I've been "dating" this camgirl for a month and things were going great. We had the boyfriend/girlfriend talk and we set some pretty clear boundaries. She, of her own accord set the boundary that she would never tell viewers things like "my love" "I think about you"(in a non sexual way IE like you just popped into my head and I miss you) etc. And great, I trusted her word and was happy with this boundary.

Now the other day a long time viewer pops in and she goes "Oh my love is here" and she LIT UP. Then when he was leaving she goes "Write to me later, don't let anything stop you. I think about you, I think about you all day" and there I was feeling completely and absolutely devastated and betrayed. That was literally THE boundary and she broke it. When I confronted her about it she said she only said it because her job requires it. Am I wrong for not being ok with this? Am I right to be upset and feel angry and betrayed? If she lied to me about not saying this to anyone else, what else is she lying about? There's also the fact that past her saying I'm her boyfriend she does nothing to make me FEEL this way. Outside of her camming we only talk a few minutes at night before she goes to sleep if at all and yet she's up late at night online posting pictures and talking to who knows. No one in her personal knows about me in ANY way and she refuses to budge on this and her own mother knows she's a camgirl. And we literally have no sexual intimacy outside of work, or personal for that matter.

My question is, should I be ok with this? Am I being unreasonable or dramatic for feeling hurt and betrayed? Am I being unreasonable for feeling like I'm not being treated like a boyfriend at all given we have no kind of intimacy or acknowledgement outside of work? I'd really like a model's opinion and please be brutally honest. If I'm being a jerk and unreasonable I will go apologize to this lady immediately.
dunno if to cry or laugh... making me angry even to read this post, i feel sorry for all the cam models who need to deal with this shit ... we have enough on our head trying to please every single guy , now all we need are jelous and fucked up online bfss ... leave her alone to do her work or give her 10k dollars every month she will say my love only to you online, fking hell . I cant deal with this things if a customer telling me how to do my job i bann him, first is some cam models fault that enjoy to play with guys mind making them spend this way , playing the love game,, second is guys fault going in this stupid game while he knows is her job to play the love game to him and rest of the guys intrested .. I also have someone like u in my room thinking that he is my bf , when i go online and he say 'hi love ' makes me sick to my stomac , .. but ok i move on .. is what he likes to think, but first second he will tell me something about how to deal with my room ill kick his ass out even if he is a good spender ..i got a lot of shit to deal with every day hours on, no need his stupid dramas ..
 
dunno if to cry or laugh... making me angry even to read this post, i feel sorry for all the cam models who need to deal with this shit ... we have enough on our head trying to please every single guy , now all we need are jelous and fucked up online bfss ... leave her alone to do her work or give her 10k dollars every month she will say my love only to you online, fking hell . I cant deal with this things if a customer telling me how to do my job i bann him, first is some cam models fault that enjoy to play with guys mind making them spend this way , playing the love game,, second is guys fault going in this stupid game while he knows is her job to play the love game to him and rest of the guys intrested .. I also have someone like u in my room thinking that he is my bf , when i go online and he say 'hi love ' makes me sick to my stomac , .. but ok i move on .. is what he likes to think, but first second he will tell me something about how to deal with my room ill kick his ass out even if he is a good spender ..i got a lot of shit to deal with every day hour on, no need his stupid dramas ..
Weird that you seem to think I'm telling her how to do her job. She entered a committed relationship willingly which means it should not be a "love game", created her OWN boundary, not by my say so and broke it of her own accord. All I did was confront her about the fact she broke a boundary and the impact that had and how we could move forward in a calm manner, not tell her "HEY YOU CANNOT DO THIS STOP DOING THIS" you assumed alot even though I was pretty clear. Thanks for the time and the opinion though, appreciated!
 
Weird that you seem to think I'm telling her how to do her job. She entered a committed relationship willingly which means it should not be a "love game", created her OWN boundary, not by my say so and broke it of her own accord. All I did was confront her about the fact she broke a boundary and the impact that had and how we could move forward in a calm manner, not tell her "HEY YOU CANNOT DO THIS STOP DOING THIS" you assumed alot even though I was pretty clear. Thanks for the time and the opinion though, appreciated!
we usually have manny comitted relationships online, is part of the work .. how much per month cost u this comitted relationship? maybe the other love that enter the room was spending more then you,, i give him the right to be her love also .. :)
 
just trying to tell you that this is our work , and yes 80% of the cam models play with guys about love and bulshit , i did the same when i was young and had energy for this, guess in my life time cam model i had like over 200 commitments , richard, steven, shaun, pete, and 194 more, but my favorite was richard, he used to spend kinda 10 000 a month, told him 'my love ' from all my heart :hearttttt
 
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Okay so first...is this an online long distance relationship? Did you meet her though cam? Or a met in real life and found out later she's a camgirl? This context helps since 'dating' is in quotes
 
Okay so first...is this an online long distance relationship? Did you meet her though cam? Or a met in real life and found out later she's a camgirl? This context helps since 'dating' is in quotes
Good questions! Yes it is long distance and yes we met through cam.
 
I think unless there's specific plans to close the distance (Although this year the possibilities like that are insanely complicated due to the pandemic) you really need to evaluate whether this is a serious relationship to her as much as it is to you. We have seen many many members who are under the impression they are dating a cam girl when they are just getting the same girlfriend experience as other regulars she has and pulls off the platform. With that warning I'd recommend to stop watching her on cam if it's upsetting. She's at work and you being a member and having that experience you know in the end her job is about money.

You have only been 'dating' in a very loose term for a month. There's already jealousy, lies and boundary crossing. It translates basically into "She's just not that into you" . I don't think it's wrong for you to feel any of those things. I think it's not so much about whether it's right for you to feel this way but I just think the reality is she doesn't think of you as an actual boyfriend and could be treating other regulars in the same manner as well. I have an instinct she does not consider this a real relationship.

Source: [As I often indicate on these posts because I chime in often] I am a model who fell in love with a member & been living together for 5 years now]
 
I think unless there's specific plans to close the distance (Although this year the possibilities like that are insanely complicated due to the pandemic) you really need to evaluate whether this is a serious relationship to her as much as it is to you. We have seen many many members who are under the impression they are dating a cam girl when they are just getting the same girlfriend experience as other regulars she has and pulls off the platform. With that warning I'd recommend to stop watching her on cam if it's upsetting. She's at work and you being a member and having that experience you know in the end her job is about money.

You have only been 'dating' in a very loose term for a month. There's already jealousy, lies and boundary crossing. It translates basically into "She's just not that into you" . I don't think it's wrong for you to feel any of those things. I think it's not so much about whether it's right for you to feel this way but I just think the reality is she doesn't think of you as an actual boyfriend and could be treating other regulars in the same manner as well. I have an instinct she does not consider this a real relationship.

Source: [As I often indicate on these posts because I chime in often] I am a model who fell in love with a member & been living together for 5 years now]


@mrxcode Look up "Girlfriend Experience" or G.F.E. and you'll most likely have your answers.
 
I think unless there's specific plans to close the distance (Although this year the possibilities like that are insanely complicated due to the pandemic) you really need to evaluate whether this is a serious relationship to her as much as it is to you. We have seen many many members who are under the impression they are dating a cam girl when they are just getting the same girlfriend experience as other regulars she has and pulls off the platform. With that warning I'd recommend to stop watching her on cam. She's at work and you being a member and having that experience you know in the end her job is about money.

You have only been 'dating' in a very loose term for a month. There's already jealousy, lies and boundary crossing. It translates basically into "She's just not that into you" . I don't think it's wrong for you to feel any of those things. I think it's not so much about whether it's right for you to feel this way but I just think the reality is she doesn't think of you as an actual boyfriend and could be treating other regulars in the same manner as well. I have an instinct she does not consider this a real relationship.

Source: [As I often indicate on these posts because I chime in often] I am a model who fell in love with a member & been living together for 5 years now]
There ARE specific plans to close the distance for sure and it has been talked about at least and I am committed to making it happen if that's what's wanted. But you're right, there is jealousy, lies and boundary crossing. I fully own up to the jealousy but it's only because to me it's as you said, I don't think there is full honesty as to what the relationship is and boundaries were crossed which shouldn't have been(literally one boundary). As long as I am being treated in a transparent manner I'd be totally fine. Thanks for the response!
 
Wow dude. So you made a verbal agreement. She broke it. Deal over. Move on because this will never work! Cut ties.
Yea what really threw me for a spin is that it was an agreement SHE initiated. It was a boundary she created of her own accord. And then broke. This is the problem with being a romantic haha
 
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just trying to tell you that this is our work , and yes 80% of the cam models play with guys about love and bulshit , i did the same when i was young and had energy for this, guess in my life time cam model i had like over 200 commitments , richard, steven, shaun, pete, and 194 more, but my favorite was richard, he used to spend kinda 10 000 a month, told him 'my love ' from all my heart :hearttttt
Thanks for the brutal honesty. I appreciate it
 
Ok so! I know there are ALOT of posts about this but I think mine is unique enough that it merits a separate post. So I've been "dating" this camgirl for a month and things were going great. We had the boyfriend/girlfriend talk and we set some pretty clear boundaries. She, of her own accord set the boundary that she would never tell viewers things like "my love" "I think about you"(in a non sexual way IE like you just popped into my head and I miss you) etc. And great, I trusted her word and was happy with this boundary.

Now the other day a long time viewer pops in and she goes "Oh my love is here" and she LIT UP. Then when he was leaving she goes "Write to me later, don't let anything stop you. I think about you, I think about you all day" and there I was feeling completely and absolutely devastated and betrayed. That was literally THE boundary and she broke it. When I confronted her about it she said she only said it because her job requires it. Am I wrong for not being ok with this? Am I right to be upset and feel angry and betrayed? If she lied to me about not saying this to anyone else, what else is she lying about? There's also the fact that past her saying I'm her boyfriend she does nothing to make me FEEL this way. Outside of her camming we only talk a few minutes at night before she goes to sleep if at all and yet she's up late at night online posting pictures and talking to who knows. No one in her personal knows about me in ANY way and she refuses to budge on this and her own mother knows she's a camgirl. And we literally have no sexual intimacy outside of work, or personal for that matter.

My question is, should I be ok with this? Am I being unreasonable or dramatic for feeling hurt and betrayed? Am I being unreasonable for feeling like I'm not being treated like a boyfriend at all given we have no kind of intimacy or acknowledgement outside of work? I'd really like a model's opinion and please be brutally honest. If I'm being a jerk and unreasonable I will go apologize to this lady immediately.
This doesn't sound healthy. Mainly that a) you're in there watching her and checking up on her and how she acts, and b) that she has completely bull shit you.

It sounds like maybe a dating site might be a good option for you, if you are wanting to have a real long-distance relationship with someone. I say real, in the sense that it will be more likely to be a two way thing. Because this does not sound like it is truly a two way thing.

I'm not judging you for being in her room, but I do think it is notable that you even felt the need to be there in the first place. You never said whether she knew you were in the room or not. But, man, this has a shitty future (just from your perspective alone) if you're gonna have to feel the need to hang out in her room while she works. Is that really how you want to spend your life? I joke around a lot in the public area of this forum, but I am being 100% serious with this post. Think about how many hours of turmoil and discomfort this relationship is gonna put you through, going forward, if you feel the need to waste your time watching her online. There are so many more fun things to do in life :).

ETA; I wish you luck in cutting ties and moving forward, as poster directly above suggested.
 
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This doesn't sound healthy. Mainly that a) you're in there watching her and checking up on her and how she acts, and b) that she has completely bull shit you.

It sounds like maybe a dating site might be a good option for you, if you are wanting to have a real long-distance relationship with someone. I say real, in the sense that it will be more likely to be a two way thing. Because this does not sound like it is truly a two way thing.

I'm not judging you for being in her room, but I do think it is notable that you even felt the need to be there in the first place. You never said whether she knew you were in the room or not. But, man, this has a shitty future (just from your perspective alone) if you're gonna have to feel the need to hang out in her room while she works. Is that really how you want to spend your life? I joke around a lot in the public area of this forum, but I am being 100% serious with this post. Think about how many hours of turmoil and discomfort this relationship is gonna put you through, going forward, if you feel the need to waste your time watching her online. There are so many more fun things to do in life :).

ETA; I wish you luck in cutting ties and moving forward, as poster directly above suggested.
Thank you, I appreciate the honest answer! She was aware I was in there.
 
She was aware I was in there.
OK, even worse boding for any potential relationship than I thought.
Sounds like it would be more worthy of your emotional energy and time, to pursue someone else instead.
What you witnessed is probably a blessing in disguise (taking the long term into account).
 
There's also the fact that past her saying I'm her boyfriend she does nothing to make me FEEL this way. Outside of her camming we only talk a few minutes at night before she goes to sleep if at all and yet she's up late at night online posting pictures and talking to who knows.
Sounds like you're just another cam room regular being shown some basic courtesy because you tip. Girlfriend Experience has been mentioned above, but had I (unwittingly) bought into that with her and gotten your experience, I would have left a pretty lukewarm review.

If I were you I'd try to find something else to do with my time, or at the very least find another model to spend time with. If you do the latter, pray that she isn't the jealous type 🤭
 
GFE is only if it's asked for. Models should not be assuming anyone wants GFE, unless there has been a prior conversation and it has been specifically asked for. Otherwise, it's just straight-up manipulation and lies.

I'll stop going on now, but a lot of people are coming to this business out of desperation right now, and many of them don't know what they are doing. Especially when it comes specifically to roleplay. On both sides, there always have to be conversation and consent. OK done playing Mom for the day. This was more a general post for those out there who might be silently reading without commenting. Just as buyers should never assume all models are into hardcore, and just launch into it. Models should never assume that all buyers are into, or wanting GFE, and just launch into it. That's annoying, and unfair.
 
Outside of her camming we only talk a few minutes at night before she goes to sleep if at all and yet she's up late at night online posting pictures and talking to who knows. No one in her personal knows about me in ANY way and she refuses to budge on this and her own mother knows she's a camgirl. And we literally have no sexual intimacy outside of work, or personal for that matter.
I dont think she is your girlfriend, mah dude.

why?

most of your communication is done while she is camming. sounds like any type of sexual interaction is done on cam where there is a price. if she was really your girlfriend she would be wanting to speak with you frequently off cam. sure you and her agreed to be "boyfriend and girlfriend" but honestly to me it sounds like she hustled you into a girlfriend experience.

if im wrong, and she really is your girlfriend. just really bad at it. you need to stop visiting her on cam. PERIOD. she is a cammodel and is going to be flirtatious with other cammembers. if my husband told me i need to stop telling my regs that i missed them, thinking about them, whatever- im gonna lose those members, and its going to overall hurt my income. start only communicating offsite. stop paying into her shows or tipping her altogether. she is your girlfriend, and you dont normally have to give your girlfriend money to pay attention to you unless its a sugar baby situation.
 
Whether this is a legit relationship or you are being conned only the cam model knows and the chances of it being real are low.

First of all, you both should have established that you would not enter her room or tip her EVER again. Work is work. If you want the relationship to be real treat it like one. Find a way to message/video call her when she has some free time on Skype, Snap, Hangouts or whatever messenger people use these days... but take precautions about what you tell her and show her because it could be scam and someone could use any information you reveal against you. If she's a studio model and possibly studying as well she probably won't have much free time for you anyway.
 
OK, even worse boding for any potential relationship than I thought.
Sounds like it would be more worthy of your emotional energy and time, to pursue someone else instead.
What you witnessed is probably a blessing in disguise (taking the long term into account).

I dont think she is your girlfriend, mah dude.

why?

most of your communication is done while she is camming. sounds like any type of sexual interaction is done on cam where there is a price. if she was really your girlfriend she would be wanting to speak with you frequently off cam. sure you and her agreed to be "boyfriend and girlfriend" but honestly to me it sounds like she hustled you into a girlfriend experience.

if im wrong, and she really is your girlfriend. just really bad at it. you need to stop visiting her on cam. PERIOD. she is a cammodel and is going to be flirtatious with other cammembers. if my husband told me i need to stop telling my regs that i missed them, thinking about them, whatever- im gonna lose those members, and its going to overall hurt my income. start only communicating offsite. stop paying into her shows or tipping her altogether. she is your girlfriend, and you dont normally have to give your girlfriend money to pay attention to you unless its a sugar baby situation.
Thank you for this perspective. Gave me lots to think about!
 
Whether this is a legit relationship or you are being conned only the cam model knows and the chances of it being real are low.

First of all, you both should have established that you would not enter her room or tip her EVER again. Work is work. If you want the relationship to be real treat it like one. Find a way to message/video call her when she has some free time on Skype, Snap, Hangouts or whatever messenger people use these days... but take precautions about what you tell her and show her because it could be scam and someone could use any information you reveal against you. If she's a studio model and possibly studying as well she probably won't have much free time for you anyway.
I think this is a good perspective and a potential path forward if there is one! Thanks and cheers
 
GFE is only if it's asked for. Models should not be assuming anyone wants GFE, unless there has been a prior conversation and it has been specifically asked for. Otherwise, it's just straight-up manipulation and lies.

I'll stop going on now, but a lot of people are coming to this business out of desperation right now, and many of them don't know what they are doing. Especially when it comes specifically to roleplay. On both sides, there always have to be conversation and consent. OK done playing Mom for the day. This was more a general post for those out there who might be silently reading without commenting. Just as buyers should never assume all models are into hardcore, and just launch into it. Models should never assume that all buyers are into, or wanting GFE, and just launch into it. That's annoying, and unfair.

I mentioned GFE because I wanted him to look it up and think about it. But, my guess is that he wouldn't just like he didn't read any of the other threads he's apparently aware of but refuses to see his situation is not unique and is identical to countless others.

Yes, GFE should be a mutual agreement. But, like we've seen countless times, it isn't. Why go into a mutual agreement where someone might think twice about it and back out, when they can hook a socially inept person who's falling for them just because they show some interest?


A little harsh? Maybe. But, I'm kinda in a mood and tired of having someone come here who claims to know there are "ALOT of posts about this" but I thinks his "is unique enough that it merits a separate post" tells me this person didn't read jack shit of them otherwise he'd realize his situation isn't unique in any way.


I think this is a good perspective and a potential path forward if there is one! Thanks and cheers

It's a dumb path to go down, and you're a fool if you do. You're at a fork in the road:

1) Take the road to the left and continue on down this foolish path of playing into this model's love con while thinking you're her (jealous) boyfriend).
2) Take the road to the right, knowing full well that cam models offer fantasy excitement only and enjoy it. Realizing that you have better chances of winning the lottery and getting struck by lightning while wearing a pink tutu in a tattoo parlour.
3) Realize that you're in a realm you shouldn't be, turn around and leave this all behind.
 
Yes, GFE should be a mutual agreement. But, like we've seen countless times, it isn't. Why go into a mutual agreement where someone might think twice about it and back out, when they can hook a socially inept person who's falling for them just because they show some interest?
Agreed. However, sometimes it is mutually agreed upon. I have lots of regulars who want the GFE experience and have asked for it first. I also have a few with wedding fetishes that have asked for the wife experience (haha well the roleplay wife experience anyways, not the real wife experience). If someone came into my room and witnessed me talking to one of these people out of context, I would look like I was swindling them, or potentially a new model might think that's how experienced cam models act with everyone (when it should not be, unless specifically asked), take notes, and go with it. Thereby causing all kinds of trouble with the patrons, in their own respective room.

There are all kinds of idiots out there who take things out of context, make assumptions, and come to (for lack of a better phrase) Dipshitted inaccurate conclusions about things. There are even more, who project what they would want (or what one dipshit told them one time), onto other people, and then set up these stupid, arbitrary overgeneralizations regarding "what all women/ men want". Unfortunately, I've seen recently (not on this forum), but in certain telegram groups, that there are a ton of new models out there, who are being fed total bullshit on how to approach the business. I thought that this was a thing of the past, but still in 2020 people are coaching tons of new models to automatically assume every guy is after GFE, without even asking. Personally, I don't like it, because this leads to the type of issues that constantly come up at this forum.

So I try to do my part to communicate more thoroughly in the hopes someone out there might read, and understand. Because the problem is, I plan on streaming more soon. People do idiotic things, which put other people in shitty moods when they go to the next model or next room. I don't wanna have to deal with it and mend some other models mess, to be honest, or have to pick up all of the pieces. I've done it so much now, that it's gotten old. As I'm sure the people who have been trying to help these guys out on this forum, also feel too. If you have real empathy, it burns you out, as you seem to be a prime example of Force.

So anyway I'm in the process of lowering my OCD meds, so this post is way more thorough than it needs to be. But it's also an issue that I feel strongly about.

Sidenote; Happy Halloween Force. Stay inside, it's crazy out there. I just went to get a pizza, and it's f***ing insane outside. Full moon. Mist. People roaming around in the dark without reflective gear, dressed in black, things which you think are people, which actually are not, set up by the side of the street... and the list could go on. I nearly s**t my pants, and my roommate nearly had a heart attack (and we were only driving about 5 miles an hour!). Stay home, everyone!
 
Agreed. However, sometimes it is mutually agreed upon. I have lots of regulars who want the GFE experience and have asked for it first. I also have a few with wedding fetishes that have asked for the wife experience (haha well the roleplay wife experience anyways, not the real wife experience). If someone came into my room and witnessed me talking to one of these people out of context, I would look like I was swindling them, or potentially a new model might think that's how experienced cam models act with everyone (when it should not be, unless specifically asked), take notes, and go with it. Thereby causing all kinds of trouble with the patrons, in their own respective room.

There are all kinds of idiots out there who take things out of context, make assumptions, and come to (for lack of a better phrase) Dipshitted inaccurate conclusions about things. There are even more, who project what they would want (or what one dipshit told them one time), onto other people, and then set up these stupid, arbitrary overgeneralizations regarding "what all women/ men want". Unfortunately, I've seen recently (not on this forum), but in certain telegram groups, that there are a ton of new models out there, who are being fed total bullshit on how to approach the business. I thought that this was a thing of the past, but still in 2020 people are coaching tons of new models to automatically assume every guy is after GFE, without even asking. Personally, I don't like it, because this leads to the type of issues that constantly come up at this forum.

So I try to do my part to communicate more thoroughly in the hopes someone out there might read, and understand. Because the problem is, I plan on streaming more soon. People do idiotic things, which put other people in shitty moods when they go to the next model or next room. I don't wanna have to deal with it and mend some other models mess, to be honest, or have to pick up all of the pieces. I've done it so much now, that it's gotten old. As I'm sure the people who have been trying to help these guys out on this forum, also feel too. If you have real empathy, it burns you out, as you seem to be a prime example of Force.

So anyway I'm in the process of lowering my OCD meds, so this post is way more thorough than it needs to be. But it's also an issue that I feel strongly about.

Sidenote; Happy Halloween Force. Stay inside, it's crazy out there. I just went to get a pizza, and it's f***ing insane outside. Full moon. Mist. People roaming around in the dark without reflective gear, dressed in black, things which you think are people, which actually are not, set up by the side of the street... and the list could go on. I nearly s**t my pants, and my roommate nearly had a heart attack (and we were only driving about 5 miles an hour!). Stay home, everyone!

Thanks, Eli. Glad you made it home without incident!

Like you, I don't like seeing people being taken advantage of. While I do want to help people realize the situation they're in. What gets to me is those who claim to know about the threads but don't read them or think their situation still is unique. Had they of really read them, they'd realize that it isn't so. Given the number of threads we have here, they cover pretty much any situation where a member falls for a model.

One could say that if I'm tired of reading these threads, I could just stop. While that's true, these lovestruck members who come here could do everyone a favour by helping themselves and actually reading the countless threads that Amber took time to put together. Then, if they have some level of deductive reasoning which made them question their "relationship", they'd realize there's far too many similarities and not have to ask questions. Again, I'd say the chances of a truly unique situation coming up is extremely rare.

More so, if they feel the need to ask questions, they really should listen to the advice they've asked for. But, denial is as much a stage of change(or grief) as it is a river in Africa.
 
Going to echo pretty much what everyone else has said and say that it doesn't sound like you're in a real relationship.

I know whenever I'm in a brand spankin' new relationship, I want to spend as much time as possible being with or talking to the person I am dating. It usually takes longer than a month for the honeymoon phase to wear off, and even then, I'm going to chat with my boyfriend more than a couple of minutes a day and there will definitely be intimacy (granted, I've never been in a long distance relationship before). Most women I have known and been friends with act similarly in new relationships, because the beginning of a relationship is (usually) exciting and fun. The fact that she doesn't really seem to want anything to do with you outside of camming is a pretty obvious sign she isn't all that into you.

I could understand her not wanting to tell people in her personal life about you, considering how new it is and how the two of you met, but are you even on her personal social media? How long were you a customer before she became your "girlfriend"? And one of the most important questions, are you still paying her while you watch her cam? I have a feeling we all know what the answers are, and they don't point to a positive outcome.

You do have a right to be upset if she legit told you that she was in a committed relationship with you, because it's pretty messed up to screw with someone's feelings like that. But, now it's up to you on whether or not you'll continue buying into this game or cut ties and move on to something or someone else that won't make you feel like this.


Editing so I don't dp (and also for multiple typos, because apparently I can't English properly tonight):

While that's true, these lovestruck members who come here could do everyone a favour by helping themselves and actually reading the countless threads that Amber took time to put together. Then, if they have some level of deductive reasoning which made them question their "relationship", they'd realize there's far too many similarities and not have to ask questions. Again, I'd say the chances of a truly unique situation coming up is extremely rare.

@ForceTen ^^ (since I can't figure out how to directly quote when editing)

Almost everyone who is legitimate with these posts (and not just making up situations, which I have an inkling has happened before), are going to think that their situation is unique no matter what because while "all those other guys are getting scammed, I can't possibly be getting scammed by my beloved cam model girlfriend". It's like the people who buy into get rich quick pyramid schemes or get timeshares. Most people know that they are scams, but then they are fed a really believable line of bullshit during a possibly vulnerable time in their lives and they go for it.

Either that or they know full well that their situation is not unique, but they just want a place to vent.
 
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One could say that if I'm tired of reading these threads, I could just stop. While that's true, these lovestruck members who come here could do everyone a favour by helping themselves and actually reading the countless threads that Amber took time to put together. Then, if they have some level of deductive reasoning which made them question their "relationship", they'd realize there's far too many similarities and not have to ask questions. Again, I'd say the chances of a truly unique situation coming up is extremely rare.

More so, if they feel the need to ask questions, they really should listen to the advice they've asked for. But, denial is as much a stage of change(or grief) as it is a river in Africa.
Agreed 100%. I hope that you never "stop". I've seen you hang in for many of these threads, and help strangers to the very end of it, looooonng after others (such as myself) lost patience, and could not handle the anxiety/ upset of it.
 
tells me this person didn't read jack shit of them otherwise he'd realize his situation isn't unique in any way.
Not sure if this is 100% accurate. Although I don't think he read them all, I did...and I still started a thread thinking mine was unique, as well. 🤦‍♂️ I think certain types of guys, myself included, become overly obsessed (in a non-criminal way). And that obsession blinds us to the fact that this is a commonplace issue. The attention and the "love" can become so fucking addictive, there is no place for common sense or logical thinking...especially when life is lonely with no immediate change in sight.
Fortunately, some of these guys can start to see the whole thing for what it most likely is. Unfortunately, most do not listen or think about the answers, and they just fight back.
I think I am rambling now. Just wanted to throw a little perspective out there on the obsessive mindset...not that it is a good thing.
 
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