How can I tell if a cam girl truly has real feelings for me?

[Jwolf2334]

Hey everyone,
I have been visiting webcam sites for a few years now. About 4 months ago I met a girl on mfc. I started to have real feelings for her, and she says she has real feelings for me too. She even started telling me she loves me. We have been talking on and off mfc everyday for the 4 months we have known each other. I know I am not the only member to talk to her offline on the phone since she sells her phone number. That being said she does tell me a lot of personal stuff. She has told me about having to move back to her home country, and the problems she is having get her new visa. Also she has told me about problems she has had with one of her ex-boyfriends, and I know all about her family. She has even given me her real name, and her home address. When I tip her on mfc she sometimes thanks me and tells me I am the best. But most of the time I tip her she thanks me, and tells me to not tip her anymore, save my money, because she is worried about me. Also she tells me she worrys about me when I have to work a lot of hours, and don't get a lot of sleep. She also talks about me and her taking a trip to Brazil to see her sisters, and going to visit Hawaii together when she comes back to the states. I am just trying to figure out if her feelings are genuine, and real or is she just putting on a act to get more tokens, and privates out of me. It would be helpful to get a cam girls perspective on my situation, since I do have really strong feelings for her after getting to know her these past 4 months.

Thank you for any help y'all can give me.

 

[AwesomeKate]

It does seem like giving her real address and real name to you indicates that she is opening up to more possibilities with you. Personally, I wouldn't communicate with members under my real name unless there was a LOT of trust and mutual desire established between us. No amount of money will make me let my guard down, it has to be developed over time. Because of that, I am inclined to think that, at the very least, she feels warm towards you. Hot for you, however? No idea.
Does she verbalize being attracted to you or people that look like you? Are you fit? Does she respond to your messages quickly? Does she often send one-word responses? It sounds like you have doubts about her intentions or else you wouldn't have come here to ask.

With all that said, I don't think every cam/member romance is fake. I have seen them occur with my own eyes many, many times. It happens, but you have to be realistic about whether or not it is happening to you.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

It will be easier to sort out once you two meet.

 

[Puffin]

She has even given me her real name, and her home address.

I'd assume this is both an alternate name and an alternative address.

 

[Influenced]

If you are looking for advice, all I can say is be very, very careful in every aspect of your situation with this person, just as you would do with anyone else. There is a lot of negative things people could say here but I am not going to get into any of that, no one knows your situation with this person except you and even you are blindly asking a forum about a relationship we have no way of knowing anything about 100 percent, we do not interact with this person, you do. Advice wise, again, just be careful and take care of yourself in every aspect.

 

[Phoenix4987]

Play it cool and see how it goes when it comes time for you to meet. Right now you know her through a bit of a filter and even in person there may be one. Be weary, sure, as in any relationship. But don't let your weariness consume you and second-guess everything to the point you don't even give her a chance.

Coming from a guy who has second-guessed relationships to death and it ain't healthy. I'm working on it.

 

[JickyJuly]

If you have to ask if someone might love you, they don't or they're not doing a great job of showing it.

 

[Phoenix4987]

It sounds like she's interested, but he's just questioning her motives

 

[justjoinedtopost]

But most of the time I tip her she thanks me, and tells me to not tip her anymore, save my money, because she is worried about me.

Clearly she wants you emotionally involved.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

That being said she does tell me a lot of personal stuff. She has told me about having to move back to her home country, and the problems she is having get her new visa. Also she has told me about problems she has had with one of her ex-boyfriends, and I know all about her family. She has even given me her real name, and her home address. When I tip her on mfc she sometimes thanks me and tells me I am the best. But most of the time I tip her she thanks me, and tells me to not tip her anymore, save my money, because she is worried about me. Also she tells me she worrys about me when I have to work a lot of hours, and don't get a lot of sleep. She also talks about me and her taking a trip to Brazil to see her sisters, and going to visit Hawaii together when she comes back to the states.

Yes there are successful stories of members and models, but by everything written in this quote I sense anxiety and desperation on her part. It reads to me like she may find you as a safe/friendly/desirable person, but most of all it sounds like she wants to speed into a potential relationship to save her from things going on in her life. I couldn't possibly know how she genuinely feels about you, but there are a ton of red flags there telling me that there's a good chance the love might fade after everything calms down for her.

At the very least please don't do anything for a good while. 4 months online is really not near enough to base whether a person truly cares about you. Even if it was offline I'd say wait until you know a person at least 6 months before moving in or any other big life changes (I'd say this should be even longer online, though meeting up wouldn't be bad.) It more than sucks because I'm sure you want to help her, but remind yourself that things could end badly.

 

[MFCGod]

It's impossible for us to know

I could imagine a myriad of scenarios in between shes totally in love with or it's all a game to get your money

My advice would be continue to enjoy her company (as it seems you are doing) but just be realistic and sensible, especially with what you're spending

If one day soon she suddenly has a life emergency that requires $$$$ she doesn't have and she is desperate for a hero...

 

[DonaDiabla]

Your case seems like you guys like each other but you should wait until at least 6 months before meeting each other. It does not sound like she is trying to get more money out of you but maybe she wants to see if you are trustworthy. Remember she is getting to know you. Keep enjoying her company and see were it takes you.Good luck and I hope things work out for you.

Hey everyone,
I have been visiting webcam sites for a few years now. About 4 months ago I met a girl on mfc. I started to have real feelings for her, and she says she has real feelings for me too. She even started telling me she loves me. We have been talking on and off mfc everyday for the 4 months we have known each other. I know I am not the only member to talk to her offline on the phone since she sells her phone number. That being said she does tell me a lot of personal stuff. She has told me about having to move back to her home country, and the problems she is having get her new visa. Also she has told me about problems she has had with one of her ex-boyfriends, and I know all about her family. She has even given me her real name, and her home address. When I tip her on mfc she sometimes thanks me and tells me I am the best. But most of the time I tip her she thanks me, and tells me to not tip her anymore, save my money, because she is worried about me. Also she tells me she worrys about me when I have to work a lot of hours, and don't get a lot of sleep. She also talks about me and her taking a trip to Brazil to see her sisters, and going to visit Hawaii together when she comes back to the states. I am just trying to figure out if her feelings are genuine, and real or is she just putting on a act to get more tokens, and privates out of me. It would be helpful to get a cam girls perspective on my situation, since I do have really strong feelings for her after getting to know her these past 4 months.

Thank you for any help y'all can give me.

 

[BobbyB]

I would say you can check her feelings for you pretty easy.....

Just let her know that you made a bad investment decision and that you lost all your money, if she drops you like a hot potato then you have your answer, if she offers you financial support you have your answer too...

 

[Mila_]

That being said she does tell me a lot of personal stuff. She has told me about having to move back to her home country, and the problems she is having get her new visa.

This is a red flag. Take it easy.

 

[Alex_M_21]

The camgirl sounds like she's grooming you for something.

She is setting out a situation littered in financial hardship but at the same time trying to make you think she's not interested in your money.

She may want you to fly her out to where you are, she may soon have a "tragedy" and need a large "loan", This just may be her style of maintaining her viewers and attracting tips (everyones style is different).

If she suddenly requests a large sum of money or a plane ticket I'd be very careful!

Of course, this is just my opinion and solely based on what you've said.

 

[Jwolf2334]

Thanks you everyone for your advice. It was very helpful, I am going to see where things go over the next few months before making any crazy decision. I also think I am going to lessen our online relationship, and talk mostly offline. If her mood changes towards me because I am not coming online then that shows she is only looking to get tips from me.

 

[Jwolf2334]

This is a red flag. Take it easy.

I would tak this as a red flag too if she asked me to help her out. But she was just telling me that she has to go back to her country until her student visa goes through. It was more of her telling me she was moving because we would be in a 13 hour time zone difference where she is now. So we would have to find different times to talk in the phone, then we normally were.

 

[Mila_]

I would tak this as a red flag too if she asked me to help her out. But she was just telling me that she has to go back to her country until her student visa goes through. It was more of her telling me she was moving because we would be in a 13 hour time zone difference where she is now. So we would have to find different times to talk in the phone, then we normally were.

Depends on how long of a con she is running. If she is good at manipulation she will know to anticipate the issue and it's complications before asking for help.

 

[Jwolf2334]

I'd assume this is both an alternate name and an alternative address.

I mean it might be and alternative name, and address. But I did send her flowers on her birthday, and she did receive them. So it is some address that she does use.

 

[papichulo80]

The answer is....you'll never know.
Everything that comes up there will be a multiple possible truths. Is she interested maybe, maybe not, Are you really interested? First I'd take a good look at what you're doing, and why you're pursuing this. Those are the only questions you can really get answers to.
You're here because you're suspicious and you probably should be. anything she does or says could be proof that she's for real or evidence that she is working you. Who knows maybe she's both.
I know sometimes these things work out but it must take herculean amounts of faith.
Just for background I got long conned like a mofo. And he gave me his address and phone number and i knew all about his family and his town and friends and everything. He was still lying and working me for money. He gave me enough info to totally wreck him but he's good at what he does and he read me right and knew i'd never do anything with the info.
Just focus on yourself and your motivations. Just ask yourself. "If this all goes nowhere will I be okay with this decision" if you can answer yes then you're probably fine.

 

[RogueWarrior]

You don't know how hard I'm having to throttle my snark.

I'll leave it at that.

 

[OldHippy]

At the end of the day you can't tell if she truly loves you. There are plenty of cautionary tales on these forums about guys, like you, who thought they had found true love.

Having said that I wish you all the best of luck and I hope that you guys do find a bit of happiness in each other. Take it easy, take things slowly and enjoy the relationship you have together at the moment. Don't spend money you can't afford to loose and keep your wits about you, if you do do that who knows what beautiful things could eventuate.

 

[DasRouse]

I am in a similar situation. I've been wanting to post a question about this. My feelings feel like a yo-yo sometimes. Same things like you OP, real name, address, personal things she hasn't told anyone else, like having a child from a previous relationship. She too has told me not to tip. I offered to buy plane tickets, she declined and wanted to buy them herself. Not for anytime soon, as we both have plans to move. Her to another city, me to be closer to my school. I drive almost 100 miles a day. I have more details but I'll wait and if I feel the need, I'll share on a new post. As for the comments from the other users. Thanks, I haven't read them all yet. But from the dozen I already have, thank you for the advice. I'm so torn over this. I really like her and she tells me everyday that she likes me too. I have a question for the others here. Should I not go to her Cam show anymore? Or limit how often I do? I go everyday now. I was thinking about this, would I go to her work every night if she was an exotic dancer? No, I sure as hell wouldn't. But I really want to see her as much as possible. I only am there for 2 hours at the most. Thanks again everybody. And OP, you aren't alone in this type of situation.