If opportunity presents itself, would you move to countryside ?

[Dan N]

Obviously the topic is addressed to people living in cities.
Me, I love nature (while it still lasts) and I would do my best to teach my 5yo kid how important is nature, how stuff works on a farm, from where milk comes from.
To be frank, I did started this project 5 years ago right before my son was born...still work in progress.
- project (to move to countryside, build a home with my own two hands, enjoy life)

 

[Mila_]

Sounds like a dream, to be honest, especially with all the limitations cities are seeing at the moment

 

[melanieoncam]

I did. Lived in Florida when I was in my 20s and had young children, in the middle of 5 acres of property.

I had this idea it was going to be some kind of paradise and my kids would grow up loving nature and being carefree and happy. The reality for us was very different. There were fun things true, fresh air, fun trails where we biked and walked and saw lots of wildlife, but it was a bit lonely for them because it was difficult to plan visits with friends.

A trip out required a lot of planning due to the sheer distance involved and by the time we got home everyone was exhausted. Running out of milk or something was a major pain in the ass.

My kids are adults now and I've since moved to the city and honestly don't miss the country. The convenience, availability of any type of food I want delivered, the culture and close by events just suit me.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

No. Absolutely not. Buying a house on the countryside for the week-end, yes, but I would never raise my kids there. Born and always lived in a big and international city myself. No matter where you live and in which part of the world you are, in my opinion and in my experience, small towns always = small, closed, bigoted and regressive minds. Not a coincidence that, most of the times, this always reflects in political elections. Ask Uk about it.

Usually, the farthest place in the world those locals have been is the mall, and they even think that's a social event. Can't relate. Also, is not a coincidence that the smartest people borned and raise in those villages or small towns, as soon as they get the chance, always leave those towns for study or work.

Throughout history, cities have always been the place where ideas, job opportunities and big progressive social changes have always happended.

 

[CheeseMoon]

I was born and raised in "the countryside" (why isn't "cityside" a word?), and just couldn't wait to escape. I left when I was 19, never looked back and literally went out and saw the world. Growing up in a very rural area was fantastic, but I never even contemplated living there for the rest of my life. Some of my childhood friends could not imagine living anywhere else, but country life isn't for everyone. Hope your 5yo kid has the right personality for this, but you won't know for another 10 years anyway.

Good luck though! Following your dream is MUCH more important than taking half-assed advice from random people on the internet

 

[cbhours]

not unless theres good internet out there

 

[Deleted member 37064]

My job requires me to have stable, high speed internet, so I'm limited to where I can move.

But, aside from that, I'd do it in a heartbeat! I grew up in the outer suburbs of a metro area, so the country was only a few minutes away. A number of my friends lived outside the smaller city I lived in the middle of that I'd go visit. Unfortunately, I now live in city limits of a large metro area and while I don't hate it, I certainly don't like it. I'm one who enjoys the outdoors, and city limits what I can/can't do too much.

Personally, I'd like to buy 50-100 acres of property where I can do whatever I want and not have to worry about pissing off the neighbors. Again, only downside is I need a fast internet for work. Most places where I'm looking doesn't offer it.

 

[Dan N]

@Mila_ it is and its accomplishable at least for me, not easy but we work it out somehow.

@melanieoncam - Indeed the huge distancing might be a problem for others especially when "a community" and ties with other human beings is needed.
Me, I'm kind of antisocial, mostly because I don't agree with society, the mentality of the brain-washed and total/blind obedience of those who "surround" me... off the grid, with a more relaxed illusion of freedom is much more appealing right now.

@Just_A_Guy Well, things changed a lot since, even history is not 100% accurate. Its true, in cities there are much more opportunities but why do you think that self development is not possible outside big cities?
I was born in '81 between "cinder blocks" (lived in apartments all my years), moved from one city to capital of Romania/Bucuresti and when I had the opportunity to jump into idea of having a small house on nature, smaller community relatively near Bucuresti I've seized this opportunity and took advantage of it right away because just like yourself I had so many pro arguments .
First let me start with the most important one concerning my kid, we do homeschooling starting this year so I don't have to worry about he learning vulgar words and bad behavior from other kids but in the same time I don't want for him to be/or feel excluded so children camps are taken into consideration.
At my age I did achieve the apex of my carrier as I am co-fonder of a multinational company (France, Romania, Nepal) so I don't care much about me going forward with self development but teach my kid how to do it for himself. Moving at countryside doesn't mean we need to give up tv and smartphones and internet... since 2007 most of my activity is from done from the front of my laptop.. and a laptop works ok outside big cities too.
As I've already mentioned, I plan to move this year outside Bucuresti (24 miles near, around 40 km near city capital) so its not like in movies, with houses made of dry straws and mormon-like people (tho I kind of see their point of view), with a tide and enclosed community narrow-minded community.

@CheeseMoon - countryside doesn't necessarily mean a huge piece of land in the middle of nowhere and taking care of cows (and no, you didn't suggested that) . But planting a tree in your own yard without the need of asking authorities to allow you to do that, taking care of your own vegetables, growing your own apples, playing outside in green grass barefoot without a street cop stopping you because you've stepped on it and other people looking at you like you are acting crazy... this freedoms have other impact in "cityside" ... for some you must pay.

@cbhours - I understand you perfectly... Romania is one of the top countries with high quality internet / providers so I'm covered all the way.

@ForceTen - well its true, when you depend on so many things, the range of possibilities and opportunities narrows a lot. I've already mentioned, since 2007 (with few interruptions) I've worked relying only on internet and my two laptops. So yes, I do understand how two or three dependencies can have a huge impact on your overall life.

A few comments are mentioning about lack of internet... well, I'm very lucky, I don't move to Alaska in the middle of the forest or snowee mountains (thus I do watch the shows about living out of the grid)
There's way to much to write about this subject and my lack of English is kind of an impediment here but yes, countryside has pro and cons like anything else on this world ... for me, my family and my situation, we see a lot of pros and very few cons (even then we can find a way to convert a con intro pro... all we need is the will to do so)

Thank you all for your input and I am interested to read (even reply) to some other opinions too.

 

[Dan N]

Build with our own 2+2 hands, me and my wife... this is our dream. Not yet there, last right-bottom image is how we stand with our project but we added the first payment for a living container (a bit way to expensive if you'd ask me) so we can move faster and closer to the house-work-in-progress) - btw, don't laugh about my pants, they do come in handy when 35°C out in the open

 

[Deleted member 37064]

For me, I see way more pros than cons. But, each person really is different when it comes down to it. Some like the hustle of the city, others don't. I've worked many jobs where there's at least some remote, going back to the 14.4k modems so it's all in learning how to make things work. There is one other requirement that currently limits me from moving, which is I need to be able to get to the office within an hour due to on-call work. Because of where I live, that can be five miles due to how bad traffic is.

Eventually, I'll move out to the country when I get closer to retirement and don't have the on-call duties. There's a lot to be said about having property to move around, have a garden, etc. I ride dirt bikes, mountain bikes, shoot archery, etc and city living is counterproductive to that since I have to drive almost an hour to do any of it.

There is one downside to living so far away from population centers, and that is distance/time to good medical facilities.

Best to you on it @Dan202

 

[zippypinhead]

I have lived the majority of my life in some form of "countryside". In fact, right now, where I live is pretty damned remote (80 miles from the nearest Wal*Mart, and I don't even honestly know where the nearest reputable hospital is -- probably a few hundred miles away.) I grew up on the side of a mountain. I've lived in mining communities, timber communities, surrounded by cow fields and corn, on the edges of nature preserves, and in national parks. I've also lived in the centers of large world-class cities and middling sprawl.

I'm past any romantic illusions about what living in the country might mean for me. I've driven too many hundreds of miles through blizzards and tornado warnings, just to get to work. "Not much is convenient" as a matter of daily life does tend to smack the idealism out of your head pretty quick -- especially if you're a kid who's been dragged into the situation without recourse. The novelty of living in the middle of nowhere wears off pretty quick when you have to dig the family car out, and push it down your two-mile-long dirt driveway just to get to the store a few times every mud season.

I disagree with the notion that people who choose a rural life are backwards and closed-minded. It's a lifestyle that does attract people who might veer toward individualism and self-reliance, but that's expressed in many different ways. Plenty of artists and free thinkers take refuge in the country. And I will say, the most vibrant and productive creative communities I've ever been a part of have been in small towns.

I currently live where I live because I needed to get away from the "outside world". I couldn't take the neverending feeling of being overstimulated, overwhelmed, anxious, and angry, brought on by the incessant external chaos that comes from people crowding together. I'm willing to trade convenience for space, because I need the space. So, here I am, in the middle of nowhere again. I may itch for civilization again down the line, but not right now.

 

[Dan N]

I'm so lucky in so many ways. Bunch of stores, banks and all daily necessities a cityboy may need 20-30 min away, but we plan to grow our own groceries because a tomato, an apple a potato can be food and self-confidence. Don't plan to do agriculture and animals industrial way, but 2-4 eggs/day is more than enough for 3 individuals. ... even if the pic posted above doesn't show, there are hoses (old and new ones) next to my yard, some lakes behind my terrain and small forests surrounding the area, which are simply amazing.
@zippypinhead I envie some parts of your life from what you've posted above.
Lol, I don't own or drive a car. And my son has nothing to lose or learn from a broken society which seams to get worst and bad and ugly everyday (a bit of pessimistic view but reality is lived by everyone through their eyes).. of course there are exceptions too and thumbs up for those who want to think, act, live, work for themselves, with a good and meaningful life (yes might sound utopic and a bit fantasist but there are people witch walk straight with head up) . Right now I'm a bit frustrated of my gov because they do unbreakable and not interpretable laws for taxes but the rest of the laws are interpretable, easy to manipulate for a desired outcome and of course different for individuals with certain social status ... So yes, I don't have much love for society and I see this "project" as adapting rather than fighting with it, naked and unarmed.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

@Dan202

I think I may have misspoken/misworded. I've nothing against being successfuly self-employed, living in countryside or rural areas or starting a family there, if you have a chance and want to. I mean, most of the people I know, myself included, whenever they get the chance escape the city life to "recharge the batteries". And many people when they retired they just move away from the city. But we are talking about adults here who make their own decisions.

I was just thinking about my kids and their future. To better explain myself, let's say I had to move to the countryside, start a family and have kids there. Ok. But kids grow and I'd like them - and will absolutely help them - to have the same opportunities, chances and life experiences I had. So, once they grown up, I'd totally help and suggest them to get out there. Then, If they later came to me and said, "No, I want to go back and live in the countryside", well, they're adults, they have their life and make their decisions. Just my 2 cents here.

 

[Mila_]

I love this thread

 

[Deleted member 37064]

@Dan202

I think I may have misspoken/misworded. I've nothing against being successfuly self-employed, living in countryside or rural areas or starting a family there, if you have a chance and want to. I mean, most of the people I know, myself included, whenever they get the chance escape the city life to "recharge the batteries". And many people when they retired they just move away from the city. But we are talking about adults here who make their own decisions.

I was just thinking about my kids and their future. To better explain myself, let's say I had to move to the countryside, start a family and have kids there. Ok. But kids grow and I'd like them - and will absolutely help them - to have the same opportunities, chances and life experiences I had. So, once they grown up, I'd totally help and suggest them to get out there. Then, If they later came to me and said, "No, I want to go back and live in the countryside", well, they're adults, they have their life and make their decisions. Just my 2 cents here.

Are you saying that because people are born/raise in the country, or rural parts of society, they are not able to achieve the same (or have the same opportunities) as if they were raised in a more urban area?

 

[Dan N]

@Just_A_Guy - (not the entire reply is addressed to you so don't feel targeted in any way. I simply liked your previous reply and made me think... ides just come out )
I understand and I agree with you that cities can offer opportunities which simply aren't available in rural environment and yes, at some point my kid will also experience life in crowded city environment but for now, I simply want my kid to know/feel the nature as raw as possible to see and walk in a forest and not just to slide a bunch of photoshopped images on a smartphone ... "there was a time when we had trees, and beautiful oceans but our species destroyed them all... here's a picture" ...
As a parent, my main concern and objective for my kid is to offer protection, health, food, love, experience, support at highest levels possible but current society has lower standards and 90% bad things comes from parenting and their experience. Its true, maybe not a parent pushed a gun in a teen's hand and tragic disaster happened in schools.

I want to teach my kid that we have one color under the same sun and not what history and geography teaches -- that group of people are asian with yellow skin, that group of people are from Africa and have black skin... and a picture with kids from all over the world all colors holding hands and smile... Why Hitler is considered a monster in the eyes of humanity and history and Bill Gates (Holocaust at another level, who said he wants to actually kill a lot of humans) is cheered up with no legal consequences? (hopefully you all see my point).

I work/interact with people every single day almost 12h/day 24/7 not to mention the social networks and I reached a point in my life in which I simply want to say "stop the world, I want to get off".
Corrupted gov, a massive wave of hate towards other people, waves of lies, conspiracies, untrust, violence... and the bad list goes on and on... Do I want my kid to take part of this society? NO! I will definitely don't want.
My wife and I, we have what we call "smart discussions" the age difference (9y between us) is very helpful because she has a younger mentality, I have the bad experience of a more mature individual living under communist era and we debate such things between us with pros and cons .
Damn, I have way too much to type and I don't think my personal point of view is interesting but bottom line, I see a lot of bad things and I have the will to change... the change starts with me, will continue with my kid... with time with others who shares the same ideas and principles. I can't passivley watch and agree with all bulshit, but I can't fight with society... and definitely I am not able to make people change their minds or at least expand a narrow view so yes, change is needed, change has started for me.
Emm... so far off topic but was necessary in main context.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

Are you saying that because people are born/raise in the country, or rural parts of society, they are not able to achieve the same (or have the same opportunities) as if they were raised in a more urban area?

Well, Force, first and foremost, I think everyone's view is based/biased on their very own narrow and limited experiences. I mean, it really depends of what one person would like to do, careers paths, field of studies, interests/passions one person develops and want to pursue, etc. One way or another, say, if you want to go to college, it's very likely you have to move to a big city. And, if you want to further specialize yourself after that, again, is very likely you'll find the school for you in a city, not in a rural area. And even after that, if you find a job in your home city, depending on your profession, is very likely, sooner or later, you'll be asked to move. Sometimes even in another country. That said, if you live in the countryside and manage to do what you like there, it looks like a win win situation for me. Personally, I could never live in countryside because I'd get bored within a week and I would have never have gotten my job if I had lived in countryside (without moving). But, honestly, who knows, maybe when I'll retire, I'll move in the countryside.

After a year at my first job, I was asked to move to another city and I said yes. Had I said no, they would have asked another guy. Then, I spent moving from cites to cities in my country every 6 months. After that, I spent another 6 months in another country, asked my girlfriend at that time time if she wanted to come with me, she said no, I said bye. Then I came back and got another job. Could have never done all of this this If I had lived in countryside.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

@Dan202 I absolutely don't feel targeted in any way. Everybody, after all, is on their journey and it's not like, at the end, somebody gives you a cookie or a prize and tells you, "Hey, good job". You are the one who decides what's best for you. I really believe this.

 

[Fatquack]

Never! I don't want to live anywhere where I would have to have a car (and a license!) to do my shopping. I like being able to get everywhere important on my bicycle.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Well, Force, first and foremost, I think everyone's view is based/biased on their very own narrow and limited experiences. I mean, it really depends of what one person would like to do, careers paths, field of studies, interests/passions one person develops and want to pursue, etc. One way or another, say, if you want to go to college, it's very likely you have to move to a big city. And, if you want to further specialize yourself after that, again, is very likely you'll find the school for you in a city, not in a rural area. And even after that, if you find a job in your home city, depending on your profession, is very likely, sooner or later, you'll be asked to move. Sometimes even in another country. That said, if you live in the countryside and manage to do what you like there, it looks like a win win situation for me. Personally, I could never live in countryside because I'd get bored within a week and I would have never have gotten my job if I had lived in countryside (without moving). But, honestly, who knows, maybe when I'll retire, I'll move in the countryside.

After a year at my first job, I was asked to move to another city and I said yes. Had I said no, they would have asked another guy. Then, I spent moving from cites to cities in my country every 6 months. After that, I spent another 6 months in another country, asked my girlfriend at that time time if she wanted to come with me, she said no, I said bye. Then I came back and got another job. Could have never done all of this this If I had lived in countryside.

There's a lot of variables when it comes to these things. Except in the more rural areas, there's smaller community/state colleges that offer different degrees. While many of them may focus on things like mechanics, agriculture, etc. they do offer IT and other degrees as well. Just because you're in rural areas doesn't mean you're so backwoods you're living off the grid and have to hand pump water or use an outhose.

The reason why I questioned what you wrote previously was that it sounded very much like what a lot of people here use as arguments for inner city, underprivileged people. Yet, there's never any mention about rural life and how many of them may face the same challenges because there are limited jobs, etc in smaller communities.

Neither life is wrong, it's all in what we want to do and can make happen. Life has no guarantees. You said you've experienced things you wanted to do and wouldn't have had a chance to do if you lived in the countryside. That's cool. But, you shouldn't knock a person's life because it's different than yours.

 

[NotYou]

I am already in a small town in the countryside. It's annoying, not being able to drive and having to rely on public transport can be frustrating but I do love where I live. The countryside and nature aspects of it are really lovely, and I love the peace and quiet here. Even though my town is quite lively, it has areas of nature that are extremely lovely to walk down, sit next to etc (like a little river flowing through my town with lots of wildlife (nothing too amazing but just ducks and fish). In my town, you can literally walk from one end to the other in approximately 1 hour at a "brisk" pace.

Growing up, I didn't notice or appreciate everything here. Although we don't have much amazing to offer socially etc, it is a nice and quiet place to be, very relaxing. We joke, or at least used to when I was growing up that it was a "place where old people come to die". Because typically, unless you are born and raised here, it's only old people that come here to retire. We don't have gun crime or anything too substantial so it's a nice town. Of course, we do have crime and drug addicts etc, that will always be the case but overall, it's a genuinely nice and peaceful town to be in and I personally love it. I have lived here my whole life, which is 32 years. I would love to live in a big city but at the same time, I don't think I'd enjoy it.

 

[Dan N]

Well @Brett M indeed sound like you do genuinely like your hometown, nicely described because with each line I've read I could imagine it all.
I'm 39 yo almost 33 lived in cities, on the road when I was a construction worker almost 5 years traveling all my country's cities, villages, small or bigger towns, even on top of the mountain to install a radio tower so yes, I have a bit of experience and able to compare different locations. yea, now I'm older and want to retire, focus on my kid, leaving a good life while it lasts on this earth .. crowded cities are target practice for any powerful nation and because I'm realist I do think and put all cards on table and analyze every step I do so yes, I will embrace the nature (and a tree ) as soon as I put some $$$ aside.

 

[AudriTwo]

My father lived in the boons. I had a traumatic experience of him having a seizure and unable to get help. Our only neighbors werent home, and this is the first time us kids ever experienced one alone. The ambulance dispatched was further then the one near us because Pennsylvania gerrymander zip codes which can also cause conflict with getting emergency faster help. On top of that, the ambulance drove by our mile long drive way multiple times while one of my brothers was desperately at the end trying to wave their attention. My brothers and I were all under 10. My father is also a single dad.

When my father moved more in town, and we needed emergency services for his seizures, they were able to get there a lot sooner. As much as he would prefer to live back out in country, he can't.

Because of that experience I refuse to live the country. I prefer to be in towns/cities.

 

[Dan N]

My father lived in the boons. I had a traumatic experience of him having a seizure and unable to get help. Our only neighbors werent home, and this is the first time us kids ever experienced one alone. The ambulance dispatched was further then the one near us because Pennsylvania gerrymander zip codes which can also cause conflict with getting emergency faster help. On top of that, the ambulance drove by our mile long drive way multiple times while one of my brothers was desperately at the end trying to wave their attention. My brothers and I were all under 10. My father is also a single dad.

When my father moved more in town, and we needed emergency services for his seizures, they were able to get there a lot sooner. As much as he would prefer to live back out in country, he can't.

Because of that experience I refuse to live the country. I prefer to be in towns/cities.

Sorry, indeed bad experiences can mark young people for life and in 80% of these awful cases its about infrastructure, local management, usually the "big guys" focusing on other b**it rather than developing and investing in daily necessities and infrastructure like roads, hospitals, stores, electricity (believe it or not... in an era where virtual reality is child's play, some remote villages from Romania have no paved roads, hospitals, a store, drinkable water, gass ... a huge list) but mayors offer legal bribe (an empty bucket used to store water, 2 packs of white flower, a cap with local party insignia) when elections are near... and stupid people (or maybe just poor people, not necessarily stupid) vote them again and again like castles with washed brains . Sorry... got frustrated again, it seems i'm a bit too empathic this days especially when good old humans suffer and bad people (with power, possibilities and decision makers) don't give a rat's ass. I need to take some time off...

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Sorry, indeed bad experiences can mark young people for life and in 80% of these awful cases its about infrastructure, local management, usually the "big guys" focusing on other b**it rather than developing and investing in daily necessities and infrastructure like roads, hospitals, stores, electricity (believe it or not... in an era where virtual reality is child's play, some remote villages from Romania have no paved roads, hospitals, a store, drinkable water, gass ... a huge list) but mayors offer legal bribe (an empty bucket used to store water, 2 packs of white flower, a cap with local party insignia) when elections are near... and stupid people (or maybe just poor people, not necessarily stupid) vote them again and again like castles with washed brains . Sorry... got frustrated again, it seems i'm a bit too empathic this days especially when good old humans suffer and bad people (with power, possibilities and decision makers) don't give a rat's ass. I need to take some time off...

Unfortunately, most budgets for gov't spending is based off of population, tax revenue, and expected needs so the more rural areas get very little funding and many times the nearest "hospital" is nothing more than a glorified health clinic. This is very similar to the argument about how inner city residents struggle due to lack of funding for schools based off of surrounding property values not being as high due to low income jobs, crime, etc. Similar problems, slightly different circumstances.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

There's a lot of variables when it comes to these things. Except in the more rural areas, there's smaller community/state colleges that offer different degrees. While many of them may focus on things like mechanics, agriculture, etc. they do offer IT and other degrees as well. Just because you're in rural areas doesn't mean you're so backwoods you're living off the grid and have to hand pump water or use an outhose.

The reason why I questioned what you wrote previously was that it sounded very much like what a lot of people here use as arguments for inner city, underprivileged people. Yet, there's never any mention about rural life and how many of them may face the same challenges because there are limited jobs, etc in smaller communities.

Neither life is wrong, it's all in what we want to do and can make happen. Life has no guarantees. You said you've experienced things you wanted to do and wouldn't have had a chance to do if you lived in the countryside. That's cool. But, you shouldn't knock a person's life because it's different than yours.

Sure, I know. Nobody's handpumping water or using an outhose in the countryside, at least here and in this part of the world. Not knocking anyone's life or preferences off either, I just guess you can't take the city life out of a city guy just as you can take a guy out of the countryside but maybe you can't take the countryside out of him.

 

[Dan N]

Well... at the end it's about living a decent(+) life as comfortable as possible as zen as possible with family around you. That's a happy life, that's what anyone wants (i think) - no matter if in a city or countryside.
decent + because I'm not planing just to survive like so many others I had my share of "drama" like anyone.
I wish words had a more powerful meaning because writing in english (foreign language for me) doesn't exactly express / defines my ideas.
I wish for everyone to be able to have opportunities and to be able to have as many choices as possible. Live Long and Prosper Y

 

[NattyB]

One of my very long term goals (10+ years) is to buy a plot of land far away and build a tiny house on it. I've taken a ton of inspiration from the youtube channel 'Living big in a tiny house' and I have several pinterest boards dedicated to it. Give me 400 sq feet to live in, fresh air, my animals and peace and quiet and I'll be a very happy bb.

 

[Dan N]

Well, I did this step and moved to countryside (global events and cities restrictions are a nightmare in romania, crossing the line between legal concern and abusive restrictions).
Took my 5yo son with me to learn a thing or two about working with tools so we've started digging a trench for concrete pillars and foundation ... not to much of an physical effort tho I do need to get rid off of a couple of pounds...
Here's what happened



That was enough for one day.
I've ended up digging alone for 4-5 hours under the heat of the sun but with cold beer aside... he missed a few annoying bugs but we did good overall .
Tho I do run a multinational company I have failed to engage with Sebastian at digging level. Maybe I will have better luck next time or with some other interesting activities... like planting trees in a few months

 

[CheeseMoon]

Took my 5yo son with me to learn a thing or two about working with tools so we've started digging a trench for concrete pillars and foundation

Looks like he is following his own agenda
But nice to do some bonding while you know everything and he knows nothing. Before you know it it's the other way around. Haha!