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My first post in about a month; warning: whine inside.

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Jason314

V.I.P. AmberLander
Mar 14, 2010
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Hello, everyone. How have you been? I haven't exactly been the best, and here's why.

Beginning from mid April, there has been a slight change in my life, and as a result, I seem to be growing farther apart from everyone at an exponential rate, both online and offline. Perhaps I am feeling a little bit of depression, but I'm not sure if it's clinical or not. I do notice that I have been eating a lot more, and usually not healthy snacks as well. It's like my will power has been sapped from me and in its place comes excess weight.

What is this change in my life? Working longer hours, and working on more than one job. Yes, weekends are for working, too. I rarely get the sleep I should be getting, and thus I just feel horrible and perhaps people get the jist of that, too, without really consciously knowing it.

I know many of you probably don't care too much for this post, or think that I'm just a whiny complainer (to use a clean phrase) but even so, I still need to get this off my chest and hopefully someone will read this. Maybe when that second job is done, I can get back to a more familiar routine. Let's just hope that the routine I'm in now is not a familiar one.

I miss the old Jason.

P.S. Delete this topic if you have to, Amber or Jawbs.
 
Thank you for the update Jason. Sorry you're going through a tough time. We all do, in our own ways. I've been kinda in an up-and-down ever since late January and completely understand where you're coming from.

Hope you find the ol' Jason sooner than later, and you know what? If you don't, we'll all embrace the new Jason with open arms anyway.
 
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Sounds like stress/depression to me. The key here is to find some time to exercise a bit and STOP EATING POORLY. This only adds to the problem. Even if you need something fast and easy, you can still make a healthy choice. Pack a turkey sandwich for lunch, make your own trail mix (I did these during college), go to subway instead of Burger King, even taco bell is pretty good for you compared to other places. Junk food can just make you fall into a depressive slump and even when your second job ends you can get stuck in a pattern. Make that a good pattern. Not sleeping sucks, but if you can find time for a 20 minute power nap.
Most importantly just go one step at a time and hope you feel better.
 
Depression nearly led to my suicide in late 2008 (November 1st, actually). December 2008 I discovered the Cam Girl industry. Sites like AMBERCUTIE and MFC, and more importantly the wonderful model friends (and a few of you non douchebag "regulars" too) that I've made there literally (virtually? not sure which) saved my life!
Add $20 to the cam site account of your choice, grab ONE beer, pull out your weiner, beat it to a pulp, and when said weiner heals, you'll find that you as a whole has healed a bit! Repeat if neccessary.

True Story
 
Freq said:
Depression nearly led to my suicide in late 2008 (November 1st, actually). December 2008 I discovered the Cam Girl industry. Sites like AMBERCUTIE and MFC, and more importantly the wonderful model friends (and a few of you non douchebag "regulars" too) that I've made there literally (virtually? not sure which) saved my life!
Add $20 to the cam site account of your choice, grab ONE beer, pull out your weiner, beat it to a pulp, and when said weiner heals, you'll find that you as a whole has healed a bit! Repeat if neccessary.

True Story

+1

This forum really needs forum.
 
I'm not sure if fapping your way out of depression would be recommended by professional counselors, but hey, whatever works I guess.
 

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dude i know how you feel. it sucks. i've experienced it as a camgirl. it's super tough and sucks hairy monkey butt, but you just have to pull through it somehow. i'd go with what some of the other posters suggested and i'd masturbate like hell.
 
I'm a naturally depressive person and I'm an emotional eater (thanks Mom and Dad!). So I feel you.

For the last month or so I've been on a new diet/workout regimen and I feel great, both physically and psychologically! I've lost 20 lbs. in 28 days! It's simple -- I've been eating fewer calories and burning more calories by doing some exercise. Yay for math!

But I wanted to post a few eating tips that have helped me lose weight:

1. When I have a savory craving (like for Doritos), I eat a small dill pickle or a few dill pickle slices. They satiate the salty craving and count as a vegetable! Be careful not to eat too many, since they are super salty!

2. Find food additives that you like that aren't super calorie rich. Replace mayo with mustard. Avoid butter and use olive oil spread instead. Reach for the hot sauce as often as you'd like. Seasoned salt, in reasonable doses, will do wonders! You would be amazed at how many extra calories we add to our food!

3. Find a fruit that you like and eat as much of it as you want. As my girlfriend said the other day "No one ever got fat from eating fruit!" It will satiate sweet cravings and it will give you good calories and fiber. Win! Win! Win!

4. Try to avoid liquid calories, especially soda and lots of coffee creamer. Go with skim milk in coffee instead (or, even better, drink it black) and drink diet soda if you have to drink some soda. Water, of course, is best...but 100% fruit juice juices are good for you too...but be careful if they have a buttload of added sugar.

5. Don't totally cut anything out of your diet. Enjoy things in moderation...even mayo, chocolate cake, and chips. You would be surprised how a little bit of something can go a long way!

I hope that's helpful!

Good luck!
 
AMEN

I suffer from lot's of silly little things. So I am always doped up on med's which have side effects like acne weight gain sleepiness...ect. And it gets me down. I find if I keep my self busy and active then I tend to do much better, and find motivation to do something other than whine. Like working at the barn, or a church day care. I love kittens too so I foster some. In the last year I have lost 35 lbs, I don't get pimples anymore, and I'm too busy to lay down.

p.s. Being in the sun helps a lot!
 
Runts said:
I'm a naturally depressive person and I'm an emotional eater (thanks Mom and Dad!). So I feel you.

For the last month or so I've been on a new diet/workout regimen and I feel great, both physically and psychologically! I've lost 20 lbs. in 28 days! It's simple -- I've been eating fewer calories and burning more calories by doing some exercise. Yay for math!

But I wanted to post a few eating tips that have helped me lose weight:

1. When I have a savory craving (like for Doritos), I eat a small dill pickle or a few dill pickle slices. They satiate the salty craving and count as a vegetable! Be careful not to eat too many, since they are super salty!

2. Find food additives that you like that aren't super calorie rich. Replace mayo with mustard. Avoid butter and use olive oil spread instead. Reach for the hot sauce as often as you'd like. Seasoned salt, in reasonable doses, will do wonders! You would be amazed at how many extra calories we add to our food!

3. Find a fruit that you like and eat as much of it as you want. As my girlfriend said the other day "No one ever got fat from eating fruit!" It will satiate sweet cravings and it will give you good calories and fiber. Win! Win! Win!

4. Try to avoid liquid calories, especially soda and lots of coffee creamer. Go with skim milk in coffee instead (or, even better, drink it black) and drink diet soda if you have to drink some soda. Water, of course, is best...but 100% fruit juice juices are good for you too...but be careful if they have a buttload of added sugar.

5. Don't totally cut anything out of your diet. Enjoy things in moderation...even mayo, chocolate cake, and chips. You would be surprised how a little bit of something can go a long way!

I hope that's helpful!

Good luck!

So much this^^^ :thumbleft:
 
Sugar actually will throw off the whole calories in/out equation. Carbs (which convert to sugar) and sugar itself messes with insulin which controls the release of energy from fat cells, which controls your calorie burn. Less sugar = more energy burn. Of course no sugar = bad too. So, moderation. Keep carbs around 100mg/day (that's about a 20oz of coke).
 
Keep your head up Jason! We are here for ya regardless....feel free to PM, email or twitter me if you wanna whine out of the public eye... I don't mind being a listener ;) there are a few here who have, and its healthy to share, plus sometimes outsiders can see things that you aren't
 
Thank you for your support, everyone. I think I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The second job is ending shortly, so maybe I won't be as stressed. Or maybe I just happen to have a super telescope.
 
Even working at a desk job, you can stay more fit just by standing up and doing some jumping jacks every hour. Sure, everyone will look at you weird, but who cares? Sell it to them and they'll start doing it with you. :p

When I worked at a gas station, I used to dance to music while doing my side-work (stuff I had to take care of between customers, for those not in-the-know). I got weird looks from some customers, but when I joked about how boring jobs can be made fun with the right attitude, it didn't matter to most. And I got a few compliments on my singing.

*huggles for Jason*

Hang in there Jason. We love you.

*huggles for Freq*

Glad you seem to be doing better. ^.^
 
With all the craziness that's been happening, I'm glad that seeing Amber on cam more regularly becomes a highlight of my day again. I haven't really had a chance to really post in these forums, as you can probably tell. I mean, when did this whole "thanking system" and new forum layout come to effect? That's how long I've been away.

I'm going to have to accept that the new working conditions I've been subject to will stick around for a while. I know it's been written that people here will accept the new Jason, so that's one less stress I have to worry about. Woo!
 
I'm going to get very personal here.

PrincessDaisy said:
p.s. Being in the sun helps a lot!

I can't agree with this more. I have been on and off depression for like 15 years now, and Vitamin D will do wonder for you!

Also, I didn't want to take meds because I thought they were "for weaklings" and I was afraid of the side effects. Turns out since I've been on RRSI's I'm 100x more active instead of staying at home moping all day, so I've actually lost weight and my libido is healthier.

Finally, the job thing. Time ago I had an ideal job, very well paid, with great benefits (and I mean GREAT like, they paid for 1/2 of my home laptop!), a good office and I was doing great productivity wise so I could feel good about myself. But the people at the office were totally toxic and it ended up destroying me. I could not get myself to leave the job because it looked like the perfect job and all, but I subconsciously started underperforming, and I swear the day they fired me I couldn't have been happier.

So... keep in mind that some things are worth much more than money.
 
Yay for Jason!

At first I was all "what is this thread? I don't remember"

Then I was like "Oh! This thread! I wonder who necro'd it"

Then I was all "IT'S JASON! HOORAY!"

*huggles*

One random thought as I skimmed through your first post- you're not sleeping well? I hope that's been fixed dear, or we may have found the trigger for EVERY SINGLE PROBLEM.

Quite literally, sleep deprivation = fatter + depressed

course, too much sleep does the same damn thing, so don't overdo it ^.^
 
Every now and then I see this thread title and think wow, he hasn't posted in a month and he's whining AGAIN?? Then I'm like oh nvm same thread :mrgreen:
 
Jason, congratulations on having the guts to post this. :handgestures-salute:

The challenges you face are not uncommon so please don't feel that you are alone in having to deal with this. I myself, members of my family, friends and work colleagues have all suffered from depression of various kinds and depths. It's pretty normal.

Stacks of great info has also been posted by the other members. All very very good advice. :clap: For what it's worth, here's my own little summary of pointers ...

  • Get outside and get some action going. You don't have to exercise, but taking a short walk at lunchtime, using the stairs instead of the elevator can do wonders. Physical activity releases endorphins which naturally list your mood.
  • Don't be afraid of seeking professional help. Doctors, counsellors or a quack are all important resources you should make use of.
  • Don't be afraid of medication. It helped me in the past and many people that I know of. The drugs they have these days are incredibly beneficial and often low of side-effects too.
  • Take time out for yourself. Your work sounds really busy so schedule a "meeting with yourself" whenever you can. Use it to go for a walk, go to chat with someone about something, and just get out of the stressful work head-space.
  • Don't be shy about sharing this with your close friends and family. They are an amazing support base and will be happy to be on your side through this.

I don't know what resources and support networks exist in the US, but this one in Oz I've found really great. Lots of easy to digest info about anxiety, stress, depression, etc. http://beyondblue.org.au/

In the end Jason, take care of yourself an remember that there are people everywhere who are more than happy to help and encourage you.

Cheers,
Dolicky
 
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