People keep leaving, what did i do wrong? Also pm help/chat help.

[SexySephira24]

I don't really expect anyone to answer this because im sure you guys answer these questions everyday, I've looked around but only found new model help etc not really pertaining to my questions.
So my questions are: ill notice that sometimes 4 or 5 people will come in my room one after another but the at the exact moment i say hello they all will leave at once. Dont get me wrong, i get many compliments throughout the day. (pretty beautiful etc) but sometimes it gets me down when this happens. Sometimes i think is there something wrong with me? Am I fat? is it me? is it my entire body? whats wrong with me? what did i do wrong? etc. Do many of you feel like this sometimes and want to log off? And how do you not feel this way?

My only other question is, i try to state in my profile and during show i do NOT do meet ups, but i keep getting people saying "will u meet up?" i say no, i am married etc and they say "well, we can keep it a secret" How do i weed this out so that i won't have this problem anymore. Do any of you guys have this problem as well?
Also pertaining to this, i try to state in my profile and during show no name calling be respectful etc. But i have had a few ppl come in and call me slut and leave or come in and call me bitch and leave. sometimes it gets me a little down. Any way to weed this out? Or should i just continue quickly banning the people that do?

Sorry if this seems like a lot to answer, Ive just been wondering about this stuff for a long time, and no one on mfc will answer.
As i said before, if there is already a post to this that i did not see, let me know. I did look around, but i will say i didn't go to like page 100 on the forums. if that makes sense.

 

[dilligaf0]

I don't really expect anyone to answer this because im sure you guys answer these questions everyday, I've looked around but only found new model help etc not really pertaining to my questions.
So my questions are: ill notice that sometimes 4 or 5 people will come in my room one after another but the at the exact moment i say hello they all will leave at once. Dont get me wrong, i get many compliments throughout the day. (pretty beautiful etc) but sometimes it gets me down when this happens. Sometimes i think is there something wrong with me? Am I fat? is it me? is it my entire body? whats wrong with me? what did i do wrong? etc. Do many of you feel like this sometimes and want to log off? And how do you not feel this way?

My only other question is, i try to state in my profile and during show i do NOT do meet ups, but i keep getting people saying "will u meet up?" i say no, i am married etc and they say "well, we can keep it a secret" How do i weed this out so that i won't have this problem anymore. Do any of you guys have this problem as well?
Also pertaining to this, i try to state in my profile and during show no name calling be respectful etc. But i have had a few ppl come in and call me slut and leave or come in and call me bitch and leave. sometimes it gets me a little down. Any way to weed this out? Or should i just continue quickly banning the people that do?

Sorry if this seems like a lot to answer, Ive just been wondering about this stuff for a long time, and no one on mfc will answer.
As i said before, if there is already a post to this that i did not see, let me know. I did look around, but i will say i didn't go to like page 100 on the forums. if that makes sense.

Speaking as a member, I've heard (and seen) other models deal with this same thing.
For the most part these people seem to be trolls that enjoy hurting a model's feelings.
Regarding the meet-ups, again many trolls seem to mistake MFC for a dating site,
It's the same situation with the name calling. Unfortunately MFC doesn't have an IQ requirement for it's members.
Just try to hang in there. Over time you'll build a group of regular followers and things will look up, but there will still be attention-whore trolls.
Just ignore the critics.

 

[Ambers Troll]

I am a member, but wanted to respond to one part of your question.
Only responding to your question about those visiting then leaving. One thing to consider is that the members are scrolling your chat, this can only be done with a physical visit to your room. You really are being assessed and compared in any case, harsh but true.
I would recommend you focus only on those staying, they are the ones really interested in you, chosing you and only you over everyone else online at that time. When you feel a bit down take a quick look at some of the pretty models on, those members, guests and basics currently with you don't want the company of any others, only you.
There are also people watching you in secret when you are on cam, such as from previews, lounges and PM wondering if you are right for them. That is why visits come in waves of attention, you are doing something right to capture that attention.

 

[ramblin]

I'd highly recommend that you get model status here, since I hear they have great advice in there, and punch and pie: https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/how-to-get-model-status.1696/

I haven't had a chance to see you online, but I noticed that there are a lot of "no"s in your Q&A and Rules sections ("no toys no anal","i simply do not accept it","no","no","not yet","no. never","no namecalling, "no dirty talk", "no roleplay","do not ask to meet up","do not ask for cell #"). It's possible that this is actually encouraging the trolls, since they know exactly how to rile you up. You might want to consider keeping the things you do want/do front and center and combining the things you don't do into a single list. Of course if you're going for a more controlling dom vibe, ignore this.

 

[DeadCamzzz]

I hear they have great advice in there, and punch and pie

So... there IS punch and pie in there!

 

[Teagan]

There are members who will pop in and out of your room always. Every girl gets this. Dont let it get to you. They are looking for a free show, a blonde if you're brunette, they got booted off, or a myriad of 1,000 other reasons. Just worry about who stays and not who goes. You are never gonna please everyone and that's just how it works. No one is everyones cup of tea.

Whenever anyone asks to meet just say and and if they keep going just ignore them. If they still keep going ban and ignore them. It will never stop and no matter what you say they will ask. You could have a giant sign in your background that says you dont and have it written on your forehead even and morons will still ask thinking they are a special snowflake. Or will try to tip you enough to get you to break your rules even. Just stand your ground and that's all you can do.

As far as name calling just again ban and ignore. If it's persistent and bad report them to MFC with screen shots too. Trolls, like war, never change. They will always be there and there's no way to stop them from continually coming along.

 

[StrayObject]

sometimes 4 or 5 people will come in my room one after another but the at the exact moment i say hello they all will leave at once

I've heard that some members don't like to be put on the spot like that. Maybe wait until they say Hi first. :shrug

 

[Alexandra Cole]

If whole groups of members seem to be leaving at once, or if members routinely pop in and out almost immediately, it could be a technical issue. Your cam feed might not be showing up properly or your frame rate might be unusually slow. You could try reloading.

You could also check to see if your mobile feed is switched on. If it isn't, those members might just be on a mobile device.

It could also be your audio or video quality. If your cam/lighting makes it hard to see you, or if your mic picks up a lot of background noise, members could leave abruptly.

On member behavior: You can't control the things people say. You can control your response to those things. You can ignore, deflect, ban, and say no. If someone wants to meet, just decline it. If someone hassles you, ban them. Find your boundaries, then do whatever you feel is necessary to preserve them. You're the one in control and eventually managing your room will come easily to you.

Most importantly, don't take any of it personally. And the longer you cam, the more obvious it'll be that none of it is personal.

 

[NickT]

So my questions are: ill notice that sometimes 4 or 5 people will come in my room one after another but the at the exact moment i say hello they all will leave at once.

I'm sorry, but I'm one of those people who leave when the model says Hello. I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but I'm an introvert and don't like being put on the spot. When the model says Hello, it feels too much like I'm being put on the spot and have to respond and come up with conversation. It would be like if you were in the audience of a show and the person on stage looked straight at you and said "Hello." The extroverts probably love that type of attention, but it makes me break out in a sweat and want to leave. It's the same in the chat rooms. I leave because I don't want her to be waiting for my response, which likely isn't going to happen. So rather than sitting in awkward silence, I leave.

I will also pretty much immediately leave a room if the model isn't talking and there's no chat in the window. That silence is uncomfortable.

What I am comfortable with is making an occasional comment related to the ongoing conversation. If there is talking going on, I'll stick around because then I can be my comfortable wallflower self and throw in a witty comment every now and then when it fits. But I'm no good at maintaining an ongoing conversation.

My suggestion would be to create the environment of a lively room. Talk, even if you have to pretend you're having a conversation with someone else. We don't know if you're talking to a PM window or the popup viewers. Or talk in a stream of consciousness where the members can add to the conversation if they feel like it.

And don't shut down members who make stupid, boring or inane comments. Sometimes "where are you from?" is the most interesting thing I can think to say. But when that's met with "READ MY PROFILE!", I'll leave and I'm sure the other socially awkward introverts don't want to say anything.

 

[Teagan]

Yeah we just had someone tell the forum to say hello to every member when they enter your room. Sounds great in theory however in reality youre going to be saying hello every 5 seconds to some people who dont wanna chat the second they pop in a room and probably breaking up conversation that is flowing. Its just weird to me. Only need to say hello to the guys who do chat and save yourself the time of talking to those who maybe wanna lurk a bit first. I'm one of them too actually especially if it's a new girl to me whom I do not know. When i'm ready i'll start talking.

Seconding the make up convo if you have to as well. Pretend someone asked you something in PM or whatever if you have to but dead silence is sooo awkward. I dont expect a girl to talk every second of course but silence for 10 minutes will make most people run lol.

 

[hapa74]

There have been lots of back and forth on the issue of greeting members when they enter a camroom in the past. It's quite interesting, but like everything else, everyone is quite different.

https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/greeting-members-yay-or-nay.20643/#post-607482

This one is an older "locked" thread, but it has a lot of insight into the topic:
https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/greeting-members-entering-mfc-chat.9125/

 

[TheAmberFox]

good thoughts from members, never thought of this before. I think i am going to wait a few minutes or so before i say hi to members i am unfamiliar with to see if they are interested and comfortable first. I didnt even think i could be making some guys uncomfortable or make them feel like i am calling them out...

 

[SexySephira24]

Thank you everyone! all of this is some really great input, i really appreciate it! I agree, maybe my rules are a little bit too much no, but i will admit there are alot of things i am not comfortable with. such as toys and dirty talk. Hopefully as time goes on i will become more comfortable. As for saying hello, yes i never really realized people may not be comfortable with chatting. Even some of my regulars are like that i suppose.

 

[Gen]

About your rules and things you aren't comfortable with - I think having a visual list of No/Don't things in your profile can be really off-putting. It can be useful to say "no Skype or videos" or something, because members might go to your profile to see if you offer them, but things like dirty talk or toys, you can always deal with on an individual basis. You're not obligated to do those things unless you list it on your profile; if someone asks about a private you can always say "I do XYZ" and if they ask for toys, you can explain that you don't offer it. In my opinion it's just always better to frame what you DO do ("I love using my fingers") versus what you don't!

 

[SexySephira24]

Gotcha, makes sense. thanks!

 

[yummybrownfox]

I think members would be more comfortable with the model just saying a general hello to her chat room ("Hey, guys! Anybody doing anything fun on the 4th?"), instead of greeting members by name. As others have stated, some guys don't like to be put on the spot. You want to be friendly and greet everyone, but many of them will just do the pop-in, pop-out thing, and not even bother answering you back. So even though you should still pay attention to your chat and be friendly, you may want to refrain from greeting people by name...unless it's one of your regulars who've just entered the room (since models and their regulars are usually on a pretty friendly, talkative basis).

 

[dilligaf0]

I think members would be more comfortable with the model just saying a general hello to her chat room ("Hey, guys! Anybody doing anything fun on the 4th?"), instead of greeting members by name. As others have stated, some guys don't like to be put on the spot. You want to be friendly and greet everyone, but many of them will just do the pop-in, pop-out thing, and not even bother answering you back. So even though you should still pay attention to your chat and be friendly, you may want to refrain from greeting people by name...unless it's one of your regulars who've just entered the room (since models and their regulars are usually on a pretty friendly, talkative basis).

May I add that some models prefer to greet members after the member has said hello, so they know they're willing to talk.

 

[SexySephira24]

Sorry, just got back from visiting fam for the 4th, thanks all for the advice. Now on to figure out how to put videos on profile. lol... #Researchinginprogress. hehe

 

[TacoBelle]

You can't put videos on your profile. You can put picturesets on there, but you'll have to make a graphic with the video screencap/description, or just insert an image of the screencap with a text description below it. Then you upload those videos to a video-hosting site (like Dropbox). Whenever someone tips for it, you send them the link.

 

[SexySephira24]

You can't put videos on your profile. You can put picturesets on there, but you'll have to make a graphic with the video screencap/description, or just insert an image of the screencap with a text description below it. Then you upload those videos to a video-hosting site (like Dropbox). Whenever someone tips for it, you send them the link.

ok thanks. ya i tried a whole bunch of sites but some request id, some take 4-5 days for it to be put up etc. so dropbox is the best option? can i put a password on it? this may sound silly, buy i worry of someone finding it thats not supposed to i wonder if putting these types of videos are legal? The only reason i worry about this is lets just say in the past i got into some arguements with roomates and they would say its illegal etc... Anyway thanks for the help i really appreciate it, ive been trying diffrent sites and it seems like they are not good ones to choose.

 

[dilligaf0]

ok thanks. ya i tried a whole bunch of sites but some request id, some take 4-5 days for it to be put up etc. so dropbox is the best option? can i put a password on it? this may sound silly, buy i worry of someone finding it thats not supposed to i wonder if putting these types of videos are legal? The only reason i worry about this is lets just say in the past i got into some arguements with roomates and they would say its illegal etc... Anyway thanks for the help i really appreciate it, ive been trying diffrent sites and it seems like they are not good ones to choose.

I suggest finding a site that allows you to limit the number of downloads per purchase by a member ( 3 seems to be popular).
That would limit downloads ( and discourage members sharing the link with others).

 

[AnneDVille]

ok thanks. ya i tried a whole bunch of sites but some request id, some take 4-5 days for it to be put up etc. so dropbox is the best option? can i put a password on it? this may sound silly, buy i worry of someone finding it thats not supposed to i wonder if putting these types of videos are legal? The only reason i worry about this is lets just say in the past i got into some arguements with roomates and they would say its illegal etc... Anyway thanks for the help i really appreciate it, ive been trying diffrent sites and it seems like they are not good ones to choose.

I use Project Maenad for my videos and they are really good so far. You can limit the download times and keep a record of who you gave what to. Their platform is quite pretty looking too.

 

[SexySephira24]

Thanks all for the advice. do i need to put my real full name on dropbox profile? or can i just put Sephira? is dropbox for my eyes only and ofc whoever buys vids? or if someone searches me can they find it?

 

[Gen]

Thanks all for the advice. do i need to put my real full name on dropbox profile? or can i just put Sephira? is dropbox for my eyes only and ofc whoever buys vids? or if someone searches me can they find it?

Use your cam name! Use a cam email address as well.

 

[SexySephira24]

Okie dokie thanks!! i wasnt sure if putting a fake name was against the rules of dropbox or something. lol

 

[Lethe]

The "saying hello" turning members away is a good tip to know, I don't ever say hi to everyone, but especially right when I get on or when conversation is in a lull, I'll say a general "hey guys, how've you all been?" sometimes it works, sometimes I notice several people leaving at once. But I'll make sure not to make it sound like I'm singling anyone out. I've so far found the most difficult aspect to be how to start up the room. Watching other models for tips on activity is great for once the room is already going, but I struggle with right off the bat. Having pretend conversations is harder for me than talking aloud, anything that requires me making something up changes my whole demeanor, so I try to avoid that as much as possible.

 

[CrazyCatLady]

I'm sorry, but I'm one of those people who leave when the model says Hello. I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but I'm an introvert and don't like being put on the spot. When the model says Hello, it feels too much like I'm being put on the spot and have to respond and come up with conversation. It would be like if you were in the audience of a show and the person on stage looked straight at you and said "Hello." The extroverts probably love that type of attention, but it makes me break out in a sweat and want to leave. It's the same in the chat rooms. I leave because I don't want her to be waiting for my response, which likely isn't going to happen. So rather than sitting in awkward silence, I leave.

I will also pretty much immediately leave a room if the model isn't talking and there's no chat in the window. That silence is uncomfortable.

What I am comfortable with is making an occasional comment related to the ongoing conversation. If there is talking going on, I'll stick around because then I can be my comfortable wallflower self and throw in a witty comment every now and then when it fits. But I'm no good at maintaining an ongoing conversation.

My suggestion would be to create the environment of a lively room. Talk, even if you have to pretend you're having a conversation with someone else. We don't know if you're talking to a PM window or the popup viewers. Or talk in a stream of consciousness where the members can add to the conversation if they feel like it.

And don't shut down members who make stupid, boring or inane comments. Sometimes "where are you from?" is the most interesting thing I can think to say. But when that's met with "READ MY PROFILE!", I'll leave and I'm sure the other socially awkward introverts don't want to say anything.

This this this!!! Exactly what I was going to say...

I (as a model and perv) come to MFC because I am very introverted. I believe the majority of the members are the same way. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable to be "put on the spot".

If I walked into a bar and immediately had some guy come up to me and say "Hi....where are you from" loud enough for the whole bar to hear I would turn around and walk out...or say good and avoid him the rest of the night.

Conversation and having cool guys in your room are huge. I'd venture to say 50% of the reason guys come to my room is to hang out with their friends while having a blast with a cool chick. Im lucky that I have 2 or 3 solid friends from my first couple nights on cam. These guys being cool and fun help my room and my attitude so much.

For me I have found what works best is just being myself. My goofy personality. My faults (speech problems/memory issues/etc) My animals. My social awkwardness. My being clumsy. I think the biggest mistake one can make is trying to create a persona. A "super sexy" always horny chick. It doesn't work...at least not in MFC. Guys want real. They want to know you. The more real you are the more conversation naturally flows. You can only talk about sex so much...but if you talk about real every day life stuff can flow for hours.

I still struggle at times when people don't talk. It really is the worst feeling...because it is FREE...and it makes me feel rejected. What I do in those times is either grab one of my pets...that can usually start up a conversation...or tell a story about your day... "ugh this morning I stubbed my toe...I am so clumsy...it's shocking I can play sports...blah blah blah." Lol. Finish...wait a moment...someone may say..."oh what sports do you play..." answer....

I have found stories of my real life have created the best "inside jokes" and convo in my room. I told them about my first kiss in elementary behind the backstop. I told them it was a kid named Charles who kissed me then told me he didn't like me because I had "swamp eyes" (green) and looking at me made him feel like he was going to be eaten by alligators. Just then someone did an anon tip and said "This is Charles you do have swamp eyes"....haha. So now any time someone tips anon they get called Charles. It's awesome because when it happens all the new guys in the room obviously want to know why anon is Charles...which creates conversation... laughs...and more fun...and as a bonus for me.. more anon tips! All from just being myself...

My best advice is just be yourself. Unapologetically...flawed...and REAL

 

[SexySephira24]

Just to add, ive read everyone's input over and over and sorry to sound rude, but things havent been looking up since i posted this. Was on all night from 6pm-10pm Camscore went down at least 100 points. Not feeling very happy. Had a great night the other night, but tonight was just, idk... I don't even have the words...

 

[TacoBelle]

Just to add, ive read everyone's input over and over and sorry to sound rude, but things havent been looking up since i posted this. Was on all night from 6pm-10pm Camscore went down at least 100 points. Not feeling very happy. Had a great night the other night, but tonight was just, idk... I don't even have the words...

Being successful at camming is like being successful as a salesman. You can get all kinds of advice and go to hundreds of seminars, but when it comes down to it, only time will tell if you can actually make it a career. I'm not trying to be rude or hurtful, but not everyone is able to "make it" in a commission-based job. And that's OK. You either keep trying new techniques until you find something that works for you, or you find another field in which you are able to succeed. Long story short, if you're having trouble paying bills with any job, find another one that will cover your needs. Keep camming as a fun hobby (for extra play money) if you like it. But keeping it simply because you have to without enjoying it at all will show to your viewers. And it's a downward spiral, cause not many people want to tip the sad/angry/frustrated camgirl. I hope that you find happiness in whichever path you decide to take. *hug*

 

[gothicfeline]

it is all finding what works for you. one bit of advice I give to new models is: never do any thing you are not comfortable with, it your room you rules.