what do i owe her?

[MFCuser]

I posted a version of this thread a while ago but deleted it, but i know at least a few read it.

When I first joined MFC a few years ago i wasnt in the best place mentally. I met a model who I really clicked with and became close with. I have tipped her a lot over the time we have known each other, but am not under any illusion that the relationship is anything other than what it is. I talk to her a lot outside of mfc and she vents to me about a lot of stuff that most members would not be privilege to. I would say we have become as good of personal friends that an mfc tipper and model could be. She has a long term boy friend, but she talks to me about stuff that people outside of the MFC world may not understand, in addition to stuff about her personal life.

My problem is I am starting to get my life together and am starting to find the MFC drama just draining and petty. I genuinely care about her as a person and hope she gets some things figured out, but I am at the point where I just dont enjoy being on MFC anymore. I dont particularly want to just ghost her, but I am kind of tired of only hearing her complain about her problems.

Do I owe her anything or should I just disappear?

 

[n_i_c_u]

Are you gonna keep going on MFC? That is a thing because if she sees you online in the account she knows it could be problematic and bring about feelings for both of you. Not sure if just ignoring her is bad or good seeing as how you both are on good terms (I've never done that).

 

[Sevrin]

Just because you met someone online, it doesn't mean that they aren't a real person. You don't need to make it personal, as if she is the reason you are leaving MFC, but I'd suggest telling her that you need to take a break from the site.

 

[papichulo80]

The same thing you would owe anyone. A reasonably kind explanation. Doesn't need to be intense or drawn out. Just that you and your life are different now and you're moving away from camsites as recreation.
I promise you if she's been at it any amount of time it won't be the first time someone has moved on.

 

[Serenity_Tam]

No one ever owes anyone an explanation for their feelings.

If you don't want to talk to her just tell her that and leave it there. A kind thing would be "i am taking a break from mfc for a bit." And be done. You can even say it was cool to know her or whatevs. Probs don't elaborate that you don't like complaint though. Because mean people suck.

I know as a model when members who are very involved just ghost i worry about their well being so telling her you're leaving would probs be considerate. But you don't have to. And if you do you owe no further explanation.

 

[BobbyB]

Actually I kind of ended a relation with a Camgirl after about 5 years with nearly daily contact.

I just got a bit tired of the camming thing.
She contacted my about some support ( money ) but I ignored the request.
Then she send me an email asking if I was OK, and I responded that I need a break from MFC and don't like to spent more money on the internet.
She replied and wished me good luck.

I see this as a fair exit for both of us....

 

[TacoBelle]

To quote Blink182, "We don't owe anyone a fucking explanation."

You don't owe her anything. However, if you are trying to A) not hurt her feelings, and B) not make her worry about your safety/well-being, then the simple gesture of kindly telling her that you're taking a break from camsites due to no fault of hers will help ease her mind. She's bound to be saddened by this news, but you should focus on your own happiness before anyone else's.

If you plan to just leave her room but still frequent her site, I would suggest making a second account. Yes, I know it's a hassle. And obviously, you aren't obligated to do so. But one of the most heart-wrenching things is seeing a username as online but not in your room everyday, when you two used to be so close and your friendship felt unbreakable. In its own way, it's similar to the feeling when you see 'the one who got away' with a new suitor. You wonder, "What do they have that I don't?" "What did I do wrong?" and other things that cause you to doubt your self-worth.


So no, you don't owe her anything. Do whatever makes you happy. If that's silently falling off the face of the MFC Earth, then do it. If you might want to be friends again later, send a sweet message telling her that you're on hiatus. Because trust me, 75% of my members that have "quit MFC forever" are back within 1-2 months. Probably another 10% are back within a year. And from the other 10% left? They either come back and just stop visiting ME forever, or are genuinely gone from the site (to my knowledge). Just don't burn your bridges if you think that there's even a possibility of wanting to return in the future.

 

[Albert_1]

As others have said letting her know you're leaving without getting into detail is the right way to go imo. I know when the shoe's on the other foot and a model I've been close to drops of the face of the earth its very worrying.

 

[SoTxBob]

This is kind of dejavous... I had a couple of models that I became good friends with since my joining MFC in 09. They asked for my offsite contact so we could chat about RL there in Bucharest. As you say, with many things in this arena, real life friends dont have the same grasp. Long story short, One of them left camming, got married sent me baby pics and we pretty much stopped chatting and one I still have contact with to this day as a RL friend.
MFC isn't the only platform there is if you have made true friends. If you want any contact at all with her, you can simply offer her your messenger or email info to stay in touch. If you're "done with her" as a person... say bye and walk away.