What Will You Tell Your Children?

[Poker_Babe]

You said she was an older playmate, right? Things have changed with Playboy. Girls with large tattoo pieces are now making Playmate. A scar on your back would most likely just be photo-shopped out if they really liked you.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking too, that if they liked me enough why wouldn't they just photoshop it. And from what she was telling me, playboy goes for whatever is currently in style. (Which is smart from a business perspective, I'm not mad at them.) So that makes sense to see more girls with tattoos in their publishing. She was telling me how back when she was modeling for them, smaller breast where considered in style at that time, and that was part of the reason why she got accepted.
She said something else, I don't know if this is still true today... She said that Playboy wouldn't accept any girls that posed nude for other magazines. You modeled in Playboy before... have you heard anything about that?

 

[PlayboyMegan]

You said she was an older playmate, right? Things have changed with Playboy. Girls with large tattoo pieces are now making Playmate. A scar on your back would most likely just be photo-shopped out if they really liked you.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking too, that if they liked me enough why wouldn't they just photoshop it. And from what she was telling me, playboy goes for whatever is currently in style. (Which is smart from a business perspective, I'm not mad at them.) So that makes sense to see more girls with tattoos in their publishing. She was telling me how back when she was modeling for them, smaller breast where considered in style at that time, and that was part of the reason why she got accepted.
She said something else, I don't know if this is still true today... She said that Playboy wouldn't accept any girls that posed nude for other magazines. You modeled in Playboy before... have you heard anything about that?

Ehhhh that use to be the case. But now it's so hard to find girls who have never posed nude before. I know some Playmates that have posed nude, but they lied and said they didn't. They got accepted, so maybe Playboy just doesn't dig deep enough to find out? I'm pretty sure Anna Nicole was a stripper before she posed for Playboy. Not a magazine, but still nude stuff other than Playboy. So I'm not really sure.

 

[coalgiver]

You can easily see where morals, ethics, and standards come from. Get to know people before you judge them. I can take certain words from certain people and turn them into a symphony. I almost bet I've been around longer than most people you'll see me lurking. If I talk that's a good sign.......it's when I stop talking you need to worry. As far as camming goes........it's basically like the whole sex topic. If you have a kid eventually they're gonna learn where babies come from. Do I hate my parents for having me.........YES! In all serious, no I don't hate my parents, but when you think about your old ass parents or your grandma or grandpa getting it on it's just strange. You might have one conversation about this subject, but there aren't going to be multiple and if there are multiple you either have a daughter or you need to see a shrink fast and get the kid help. Plus, it all depends on how you handle the situation. God didn't relate well with people........thus he made Jesus. If you don't believe in God well I'm sorry this is the best synonymical (yep that's right I just made up my own word) story I could fucking come up with off the top of my head. You see it's all relative on how you (the parent) handle things. Though I will say this...the falsehood of a lie has an interesting way of coming back and biting you in the arse. I personally believe in being upfront and honest. So yes, I'm going to be the prick that tells his child that Santa doesn't exist and then has that child tell all the rest of your children that Santa is fake. If I wanted to hide behind smoke and mirrors I'd be a fucking magician. Take it easy on each other people. You're all on the same team because you're all in the same boat.

The whole Santa thing will be a personal choice. Why? Because when I was a child I believed in Santa and then I found out he didn't exist and then for a while I didn't trust anybody and to some degree I still don't. So ya.........if you don't want your child to be like me.........tell 'em Santa is fake.

 

[Evvie]

Camming is a job, sure, but it's also a part of your sex life. It involves (for most of us) what arouses you, how you get off, your sexual interactions with others, your discussions of various sexual topics, etc.

WHY on earth would you tell any of this to your children?

There is a pretty big difference between, "I was a sex worker" and "You know, sweetie, Mommy really likes it doggy style with a big squishy dildo."

Telling a kid who asks "Mom, what is your job?" something like "Well sweetie, I show my nude self to people online" isn't going to make you the best role model.

Because sex work is shameful and no sex worker can be a good role model to her kids.

Would you want your 8, 10, 13, or 16 year old doing the same? Remember that kids are very easily influenced and may not understand why they aren't allowed to do the same things that makes mommy and others very happy.

Oh goodness, no. But if my son or daughter turned 18 I would support them fully if they decided to engage in sex work. I would explain to them that I only began having sex after I was 18, and it is very wrong for underage people to be in the industry.

I know a lot of people do not agree with this, but unfortunately I just don't think sex work is horrible and shameful and should be hidden and not talked about. Am I going to make my kid's first memories of mom talking about prostitution? No. But I sure as hell am not going to lie, side-step, or cover up what I did.

[[Side Note:]]Remember that if you plan on raising your children in a religious household without consistency (Megan, you mentioned knowing that your job is a sin, but doing it anyway) such things can be very confusing to a child. It could make them reconsider their obligation to their religion and their role in sinning altogether. "Since mommy can pick and choose what parts of our faith she follows/believes in, why can't I?" All that is going to do is raise some serious trust issues that will probably last a very long time.

My parents are quite educated about their faith, and are happy with it. They educated me the best they could, as well.

I can tell you know that if I had not believed even thinking about sex would send me to hell, I would have asked my parents and gotten real information. If I had adults that were open and honest with me about sex, I would not have developed convoluted conceptions of sex that have sown the seeds for my present-day submission and masochism (Do I wish these things had never happened? No. I am very happy with my sexual identity. But I do know that if sex and the human body had been treated without shame in my home, I would have a much more "normal" sex life).

I do not want my child to think that sex or sex work is wrong or shameful. I might hold off the full conversation until they turn 18 or 21 or something like that, but they sure as hell aren't going to get a lot of bullshit lies from me when they're growing up because I think this lifestyle is wrong.

 

[AllisonWilder]

I've been thinking about this since the day I started camming and I still don't have an answer. I would like to think that I'll be able to be honest and fairly open about what I do for a living (or did, if I'm done with camming at that point). Maybe I won't be. I don't really know and I won't until I'm faced with the questions. I have a young son (19 months) who I am doing my best to raise as a respectful, open-minded, non-judgmental, civilized human being. He's too young to know any different now, but if the topic ever arises about what I did for a living when he was young, I'll tell him the truth. I intend to limit what I tell him to what's appropriate for his age. Kids repeat everything at random so I probably won't tell him everything until he's old enough to grasp that it's private.

Just to clarify my last sentence, I am not ashamed of what I do, far from it, actually. I just don't want my kid to blurt it out to a stranger when I'm trying to pick out a decent head of lettuce at the grocery store. Not that I'm embarassed about it, but I also wouldn't want him blurting out that mommy is a registered nurse either. Why? Not because I'd be embarassed, but just because I'm a private person. (Well, except for the whole getting naked and fapping on the interwebz thing. :lol: )

--Regardless of what you choose to tell (or not tell) your children, it's not wrong. It's whatever feels right to you. It is, after all, your life and nobody can decide anything for you.

 

[coalgiver]

Everything is truly situational. One of my favorite sayings is nothing is true everything is permitted. Welcome to the law of the internet and camming. Most people will guess at the meaning (and yes this comes from Assassins Creed). Though I'm fairly certain everybody who has ever guessed at the meaning is wrong. Your freedom truly comes from your own liberation. It's rather or not you want to be free and what you'll do to protect it so you can stay free. You will come clean when the time is right for you, better yet when you feel the time is right between you and your child. Nobody will influence your decision. Though you should know that this is coming from a person who doesn't have a kid nor really wants to have children at the moment. I really wish there was a way to edit stuff after you post, god I fail at life. Though I do love this noob sign to the left it makes me feel awesome. I kind of want it to stay on.........and then all I need is a site called powertothenoobs.com and bam I have a new home.

Also, there are a lot of cool models out there and most I meet I tend to like. Though they probably do hate me, then again if I had feelings I might care or if I was a real person with real feelings. It's all about being original and genuine...nope wait that's something else...it's about having fun in hell. Hell probably isn't a place most of us want to be, yet sometimes we create our own hells. So now, it's all about how are you gonna cope while you're in the heat. I learned some where along the way that working tends to suck if you don't like the people you're working with. So ya I use that in the way I do things. Seriously though...............where was a site like this back 5 years ago? I could have used one. Maybe I wouldn't have had to waste on my money on my shrink.......*Sigh*

 

[Evvie]

Everything is truly situational. One of my favorite sayings is nothing is true everything is permitted. Welcome to the law of the internet and camming. Most people will guess at the meaning (and yes this comes from Assassins Creed). Though I'm fairly certain everybody who has ever guessed at the meaning is wrong. Your freedom truly comes from your own liberation. It's rather or not you want to be free and what you'll do to protect it so you can stay free. You will come clean when the time is right for you, better yet when you feel the time is right between you and your child. Nobody will influence your decision. Though you should know that this is coming from a person who doesn't have a kid nor really wants to have children at the moment. I really wish there was a way to edit stuff after you post, god I fail at life. Though I do love this noob sign to the left it makes me feel awesome. I kind of want it to stay on.........and then all I need is a site called powertothenoobs.com and bam I have a new home.

Also, there are a lot of cool models out there and most I meet I tend to like. Though they probably do hate me, then again if I had feelings I might care or if I was a real person with real feelings. It's all about being original and genuine...nope wait that's something else...it's about having fun in hell. Hell probably isn't a place most of us want to be, yet sometimes we create our own hells. So now, it's all about how are you gonna cope while you're in the heat. I learned some where along the way that working tends to suck if you don't like the people you're working with. So ya I use that in the way I do things. Seriously though...............where was a site like this back 5 years ago? I could have used one. Maybe I wouldn't have had to waste on my money on my shrink.......*Sigh*

I appreciate your sentiments on video game philosophy and workplace coping skills, but I have no idea what this has to do at all with the thread.

 

[katie_christ]

i don't know if i'll ever have kids. i'm one of those "the world is too fucked up to bring another kid into it" people. but, then again, i may. if i do have children, i plan on being pretty honest with them. i hope camming works out for me, and i'm able to make a living out of it while i finish school (at least). i'd love to get into lesbian hardcore as well, and that'd just add one more thing for a kid to find out about... but really, i think the way i plan to raise my hypothetical kids, "mommy was a cam girl" won't really be that big of a deal. and hopefully by the time i have kids and they're old enough to be asking such questions/find such things out, society will be more open to such things. i mean, who hasn't sent a nude pic or two? so what if i have hundreds/thousands one day? i'm not going to openly broadcast my sexual activities, but i think my hypothetical kids would be open-minded enough to go, "oh your mom cuts hair? mine did porn!" and not really dwell on anything negative. but, i have some pretty unconventional ideas about sex and such.

 

[BombChele]

I don't plan on having kids and honestly don't plan on doing this past my twenties. However, I know my older sister wants to have kids and I do have a 9 year old sister lol. I suppose I would say I modeled. My little sister probably wouldn't question it because our mother does in fact model from time to time (not in the way I mean, but she has shown interest in that lol), so she's used to the idea of modeling and wouldn't question it. If the kids got older and questioned it more, I would honestly just tell them the truth. My mom's done modeling since I was a pre-teen, but I've known since I was 18 or so that some of those shoots involved nudity (nothing scandalous, just posing, like pin-ups) and has confessed to me that she's interested in things like camming. We're really open with each other so it doesn't bother me at all (in fact, she's the only family member of mine that knows I do this), so if I had kids I'd hope we'd be like that.

I'm also an artist and plan on doing that for a living, so if kids in the future question how I survived my twenties, I'll just say I sold a lot of art and got great commissions

 

[LadyLuna]

I'm also an artist and plan on doing that for a living, so if kids in the future question how I survived my twenties, I'll just say I sold a lot of art and got great commissions

The problem with lying is that kids will then try to use that knowledge, and when it doesn't work for them wonder what they did wrong. Then the truth comes out, and they wonder what else you lied to them about.

 

[Evvie]

I don't plan on having kids and honestly don't plan on doing this past my twenties.

This is pretty significant in and of itself. While camming is obviously a big life thing for us right now, it probably won't be the defining characteristic of our lives. I was born when my mom was 40 and I never remember questioning her about her early life more than a couple times. For example, I knew she went to college in her early twenties but I have no idea if she had a job. Her family was very poor so I know she was probably working, but I don't remember ever asking her what she did then to support herself.

I also don't have the slightest idea what sort of work my dad held in his younger days; I know he grew up in Brazil (no idea what kind of things he did as a kid), I'm pretty sure he trimmed palm trees for money when he was a teenager, and at some point in his 20s he joined the military.

There are gaps of years in my knowledge of what my parents did when they were younger. Even if I knew my dad cut trees when he was a teenager and joined the military after college, that's about a period of 5 years where I simply have no clue what he did. And for most models, their camming careers won't even last that long.

If you cam for a year, or even two, three, five, six years - your kids may never even know or bother to ask exactly what you were doing in your younger days. I'm sure a lot of people have had different experiences than I, but I can't present a monthly timeline of everything my folks did, and I'm betting most other people can't for their parents.

 

[BombChele]

I'm also an artist and plan on doing that for a living, so if kids in the future question how I survived my twenties, I'll just say I sold a lot of art and got great commissions

The problem with lying is that kids will then try to use that knowledge, and when it doesn't work for them wonder what they did wrong. Then the truth comes out, and they wonder what else you lied to them about.

I honestly doubt that if I have kids, they'll question it that much. Like Eevie said, most kids don't question their parents jobs when they were young that much. The art thing was just an idea, but honestly I've always had two jobs since I was 18, and I've had a bunch. I can just stretch out a few years of work; or just go with the original idea and say I'm a model until they're old enough to grasp the whole deal