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Why 30 is not the new 20

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Sep 15, 2010
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Since a lot of our lovely model members are in their 20s, and may think that camming is something they'll do for a bit while they figure out what they *really* want to do, I thought I'd share this recent TEDtalk video. It may not be relevant to a lot of people, but for others, it might provide food for thought. I hadn't heard of this "30 is the new 20" meme until I saw this video, but then heard a 20-something mention it just last week. Apparently it's a thing.

 
Sevrin said:
Since a lot of our lovely model members are in their 20s, and may think that camming is something they'll do for a bit while they figure out what they *really* want to do, I thought I'd share this recent TEDtalk video. It may not be relevant to a lot of people, but for others, it might provide food for thought. I hadn't heard of this "30 is the new 20" meme until I saw this video, but then heard a 20-something mention it just last week. Apparently it's a thing.

This was absolutely brilliant.
 
I'm turning 30 in 2 weeks and I waited until now to watch this. Plenty of enough time to turn things around and get to fixing my life!
 
That hit pretty close to home. I turned out fine, but I sure did squander a lot of time in my 20s. Not going to beat myself up regretting it, but I certainly could have done better. Hope the young people who hears words such as these take them to heart.
 
sooooo what i got from that was "20-somethings : GROW THE FUCK UP"?

-DP
 
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And or don't do things until after you've grown the fuck up. Marrying someone just so you're not alone and use a musical chairs an analogy to describe it? I don't know which part of that made me more upset.
 
30 is the new 20 if you fucked your life in the 20s. Much like 40 is the new 20 if you fucked your 20s and 30s.

While physiologically, you have certain changes, but no person isnt redeemable, retrainable or reeducated at any age they want to be. Its just harder. If you have the willpower to change though, then nothing is beyond your reach at ANY age.

but back to the issue at hand. 20-somethings, grow the fuck up.

-DP
 
dogglius said:
nothing is beyond your reach at ANY age.

but back to the issue at hand. 20-somethings, grow the fuck up.

-DP

I've got it all handled pretty well at my age, but I refuse to grow up any more than I already am. :snooty:

Perhaps instead of 'grow the fuck up', it would be more accurate [and less abrasive] to say simply try to realize that, at 20something, you really don't know it all despite what the inner ego tells you. The first few times I caught myself in a deja-vous saying to myself, 'hey, mom/dad/random elder was right' was indeed a moment of clarity about the wisdom of the older folks that have actually lived life.
:thumbleft:
 
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48 is the new 15.
:-D

Oh sorry, I thought we were discussing my maturity rate again.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

I really did fuck off most of my 20s. But that was me. There are things I did that I may not be proud of but it is what makes me Brad. I don't think I would change much either because to be honest I had one hell of a good time!!! The girls, the booze, the girls, the drugs, the girls, the fast cars, the girls, and the rock and roll were all just part of my life then. And I won't sit here and lie by saying that I didn't enjoy it.
;)
 
I was bothered by how focused she seemed to be on the whole family/kids thing, but that may be because I refuse to have kids. Reproducing isn't really the only point of life anymore, ya know?

I seem to have things backward - got married at the beginning of my 20's, got a decent office job, THEN started camming/growing my Ren faire shop, and plan to be out of the office and traveling the country and camming full-time by 30. Being widowed, I'm not too crazy about starting any relationships and don't really care, which I didn't to begin with, until I met my late husband and everything clicked on its own. If that happens again, great, if not, I'm not going to be disappointed. I don't see the big deal about pairing up, especially when people just marry/date someone so they're not alone.

As for the "grow the fuck up"..... I don't wanna! I joke with friends that I'm really 6 years old, because I have moments/days that I just let my inner kid go nuts - like when I'm buying dinner at the airport, and decide that I'm having a twist ice cream, with rainbow sprinkles, to go along with my meal. I pull out the mature adult when it's appropriate, but do let myself just relax and not worry about things. My plans are chugging along, and a nudge now and then is all they need. I find it odd that, of the people I know, I'm the only one on medication for anxiety issues, yet I'm the one telling everyone else to take a chill pill and stop worrying so much. But I typically remove myself from the situations that cause my anxiety to be a problem, so that could be a factor.
 
I hated this video...I typed an entire essay of a response about it last night and erased it lol
But I find it kind of meaningless with the positive parts just kind of seeming like "no shit lady"

Maybe because I think if there's anything to be gained out of this video it's more on more closed minded 20 something's than necessarily cam girls.

Probably because more cam girls are able to use camming to move away from a bad situation, break up with the wrong person for them, get away from the wrong friends, leave the wrong job, learn how to manage their finances independently, see what it's like to be an entrepranuer...rather than twiddling their 20 something year old thumbs...

Also if you're going to have to work/generate income until you're 65'ish anyways who the hell wants to do the same thing for 40+years? not me that's for sure. I have a lot more to say but that's my condensed 29 year old response.
 
I think the fixation on round numbers is my problem. 23 to 26 is when people can start to make decisions without hormones driving everything they have lived a little and have some perspective.

This only applies if they don't go straight to collage or the army. 19 year olds should get a job, travel the world, catch all the diseases its possible to catch and live like there is no tomorrow. By 25 they will have some idea of what they want to do with their life. Things like collage and the army extend adolescence out indefinitely I had a 32 year old friend who had two degrees but hand never worked a day in her life. Another guy I know retired from the army at 45 and was socially the same as when he went in, he had no life or social skills at all.
 
Red7227 said:
19 year olds should get a job, travel the world, catch all the diseases its possible to catch and live like there is no tomorrow. By 25 they will have some idea of what they want to do with their life.
Unfortunately they'd also be so riddled with incurable diseases they'd be lucky to make 21 much less 25 :p
 
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SweetSaffron said:
I was bothered by how focused she seemed to be on the whole family/kids thing, but that may be because I refuse to have kids. Reproducing isn't really the only point of life anymore, ya know?

i have a bias against the shrink industry: the vast majority of it's purpose is simply to give folks the insight the engage their life, and to make it work in a socially acceptable way. The fact that she emphasizes cultural norms is actually her job :lol

i like the fact that she emphasizes the first decade of legal "adulthood" as a time of growth.....heh...it's hard not to learn something from our 20s, regardless of the how we lived them.

but it's also best, imo, to actually live them: it's a time when the wisdom of others might have meaning....but it's more important that it be a time to be yourself, and see where your own wisdom takes you.

As for the "grow the fuck up"..... I don't wanna! I joke with friends that I'm really 6 years old, because I have moments/days that I just let my inner kid go nuts - like when I'm buying dinner at the airport, and decide that I'm having a twist ice cream, with rainbow sprinkles, to go along with my meal. I pull out the mature adult when it's appropriate, but do let myself just relax and not worry about things. My plans are chugging along, and a nudge now and then is all they need. I find it odd that, of the people I know, I'm the only one on medication for anxiety issues, yet I'm the one telling everyone else to take a chill pill and stop worrying so much. But I typically remove myself from the situations that cause my anxiety to be a problem, so that could be a factor.

:thumbleft:
 
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I feel like all my life I've been running from the buuuuulshit of the first eighteen years of my life. I have enjoyed every year more and more, each turn of the calendar I've managed past high school. I'm closer to 30 than 20 now and the time I have spent in my twenties has given me stability, autonomy, self awareness and strength.

I can't wait to be 32. I feel like I'm going to have so much more of this shit figured out and be yet even stronger and have even more going for me.

I would say that I spent the last six years 'wasting it', but I needed that time. I'm so much more capable because of it.

Edit: On the time to start picking your family. I think that this is definitely true. I've been picking my family all my twenties with the people that I know will be around for me for a long time. My friend groups are fairly stable even despite ridiculously omg changes.

I think the point of this video is this: Don't let life kick you into a person you don't want to become. We chose who we become.
 
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