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Why MFC members do not talk much?

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LoonaVision

Cam Model
Sep 3, 2010
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bit.ly
Twitter Username
@loonascandi
And i don't mean my room... i mean in general, i rare go on MFC now but i still have lots of girlfriends on MFC and they ALL complain.
Let's say there is one thousand people in someone's room, let's say 800 of them are basics and guests and they are muted, but there are still 200 premium members who can talk but don't.
Maybe out of 200, 10 will talk... maybe not.
What are the reasons people join rooms and don't say a word?
Are they shy? rude? busy? lazy?
MFC is a webcam community, social website, so why they mute yourself?
 
I think it shifts with the number of members in a room, (this really depends on the room but let's say that) as you said, out of a 1000 viewers, 10 talk. (1%) but with rooms with say, 40 people, 6 talk (15%). I a room with 5 people, one or two talk (25%).
I think people who just want to have a girl in the background while doing other things will go for the larger rooms where there's no pressure to talk. If you're looking for a chat specifically maybe they think they're not going to find it in a large room where chat moves really fast and they're not getting the attention they seek. so they go to smaller rooms for the attention, and bigger rooms for just silently perving.

I think.
 
I'm super pissed off with this issue, it's bad enough that I now only get a max of about 20 people in my room but to add insult to injury, it's next to impossible to get anyone to chat! On more than one occasion I've actually begged people to even say a word and they still don't (I assume they've muted me and are in multiple rooms which is a joke). It just makes no sense to sit and stare at a girl when she's perfectly willing to chat!
 
Ok, but basically think about it this way...a ton of members work at the computer or play video games at the computer while they are viewing you. Some may get home from work, sit down and open a few tabs to look at stuff, sometimes forgetting there was even a camgirl in one of those tabs (especially if they muted her).

Yes, it would be nice if everyone put the video in a separate window, but I've had roommate's who've watched camgirls and that's what they do. When we camgirls go to other camgirls rooms, it's this cool "I'm gonna put all my focus on her" experience. When a member is merely decompressing and trying to find something extra for entertainment or only background noise...let's just say it doesn't always tend to work the same way.
 
Do your friends want members who will chat or paying members that chat? I know that there are freeloaders that will just be a waste of time but if you or your friends insist on muting every basic or "freeloader" on a social chat site then exactly who is to blame when no one is talking to the model?
 
I have to add that guests and basics talk all the time if they are not muted.
I know they talk so much shit that it is better to keep them muted but the fact... they talk.... a lot...
But what is wrong with MFC premium members i have no idea...
I used to see MFC not just as source of income but also as a place where you can just chill and talk to people from around the world...
And i kinda gave up on MFC because most of communication died in my room :(
 
eyeteach said:
Do your friends want members who will chat or paying members that chat? I know that there are freeloaders that will just be a waste of time but if you or your friends insist on muting every basic or "freeloader" on a social chat site then exactly who is to blame when no one is talking to the model?

I have mixed feelz on this.

I had basics and guests unmuted when I started, and loved all the chatting. I muted guests mainly because it's hard remembering which number goes with whom. I had basics unmuted for 2 and a half years until someone decided to start threatening to reveal personal info of mine.

Everyone in my life knows I cam, but random strangers don't need to know that stuff. Since that moment, for security reasons I muted basics, since it wasn't likely someone was going to pay to become a member just to dump my real name and address for all to see, then simply change IP to be able to do it again assuming they got banned.

Guests and basics do talk though if you need the extra chat, and don't feel threatened in that way.
 
eyeteach said:
Do your friends want members who will chat or paying members that chat? I know that there are freeloaders that will just be a waste of time but if you or your friends insist on muting every basic or "freeloader" on a social chat site then exactly who is to blame when no one is talking to the model?
I feel like I repeat myself a lot saying this, but man, if I had a token for every time I hear about a guest or basic posting a model's real name in her chatroom...

It's not just about "not letting freeloaders" talk. It's a safety measure as well. The chances of someone you know in real life posting personal information in your chatroom is so much higher if you let basics and guests talk.

Then of course, there is the idea that well-tipping premiums don't want to share a room with talking guests/basics. You're not muting them for just yourself, but for the enjoyment of everyone in the room.

Things like this members don't tend to think about, which is why models get frustrated when members insist on knowing the answers to problems that they've personally never dealt with. Things are not always what they seem.

As for the original question, I completely understand wanting to remain quiet in a model's room. There are often times I find a model I want to watch but never know how to enter the conversation or what to say. I usually tip at least, but I tend to be that member who tips and doesn't talk. It's hard to gauge a model's sense of humor/sensitivity to subjects, and I don't want to derail the chatroom with my stupid musings. I also don't want to be that guy who is overly complimentary. So sometimes I throw tokens and keep my mouth shut.
 
ComicOzzie said:
As someone who is quite often the ONLY member talking in a model's room, I wish I knew the answer to this. Maybe there is a language barrier that intimidates many members from trying to talk in free chat?

I'll admit I'm a major lurker. Even when I'm on my premium account I tend to be quiet, and tend to make myself feel better about it by ninja tipping the model letting her know who I am, and how/why I like hanging out in her room. Generally, I only chat if I'm with a member/model friend.

I think most who view cams want the feel of a social environment, but they're afraid of saying the wrong thing and maybe getting banned. Maybe if people in lounge made some sort of buddy system where they could say her if you say something dumb or get banned I'll explain things. I doubt this would happen, but meh, it's a thought.

Fact is without chat coming from both the model and members it's often very hard to make it interesting, and might as well just be regular porn if a show is going on. 9 times out of 10, chat works better than sexy teasing. I tend to not get tips at all unless someone is chatting with me. It really doesn't matter the topic. The other day a show didn't start till me and two members started discussing comic books. Another day it was cheese...seriously if people just interact with us it does help, but again I do the same so I get it.
 
I'll say when I perv on girls, I don't always realize how important interaction is. It's too easy to see a girl talking on your screen, and have it feel like a TV show. From the camgirl's side, yeah, obviously we want interaction, but sometimes from a member's perspective, it's easy to forget you're not on Netflix.

I mean, imagine you're watching a TV talk show, and the host suddenly looks directly into the screen and starts interacting with you. It's kind of mind-boggling, right? I think sometimes, camming becomes so normal for us that we forget that it's kind of a weird concept from the member's side. :dontknow:
 
Lack of chat is the #1 reason I switched to Streamate (for the most part, I still have mfc friends I like to visit and even sometimes make new friends there!). It's incredibly demoralizing and uncomfortable to sit there with nobody even willing to say hi. It also made me feel crummy that people call MFC such a social site, and I couldn't even get people to talk to me. If I wanted to be ignored by hundreds of men, I could do that in real life :lol:

As a member, sometimes I don't want to talk in a quiet room because I don't want to be the only one chatting (especially since I like to room hop). And sometimes I just don't know what to say! But there's also nothing enjoyable for me in watching a girl awkwardly try to engage a silent room. Maybe It because I recognize that desperate feeling but I will usually talk just to try and alleviate her stress.

Seriously, I know lots of guys mute us or put us in the background, but seeing 20 or 40 or 100 names with no talking just feels like standing in front of all those people just silently staring. It's almost kind of a creepy feeling! I wish people would just be slightly social! It'd make girls stay on longer and I'm sure loads of us have had nights that weren't great token-wise but we're invigorating and FUN because we had friends to talk to!
 
In my case, I vary my chattiness level quite a bit. I'm a shy introvert person in real life; when it comes to online interactions, it takes me quite a while to become comfortable enough with the person/group of people I am talking to for me to be able to just type things and send without reviewing/rewriting it multiple times, which means that when I go to a new room or I don't know the model well enough I tend to be quieter - either because I am writing/rewriting what I want to say multiple times and by the time I am comfortable with pressing Enter the conversation moved on or because I'm not sure how my comments might be received.

And even when I'm in a room with someone I am familiar with, it's hard for me to start a random conversation as that's not my usual self - you should see how my casual chats with coworkers go (all tech people, so this sort of personality is quite common).. It always ends in awkward silences :p
 
I love it when they are quiet because when I splitcam I don't get distracted by the constant chatter. I say, when it's quiet, splitcam!
 
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weirdbr said:
It always ends in awkward silences :p

This is exactly my problem as a member. Everything I say is awkward silence, or I feel might be misinterpreted. I too have HUGE social anxiety.

Also, another thing I want to mention...not criticizing anyone here. I just want to give perspective.
I know models may sound really beggy sometimes when saying things like:

"only so many tokens till..."
"Check out my videos at..."
"Hey anyone want in on these prizes"
"My twitter is...etc"

After a point we have a ginourmous problem keeping the conversation fresh, and well...our other stuff we offer might just spark conversation. These phrases can be hints that we're trying really hard to get things rolling, and while money is nice yes...chat often helps that money roll in or at least keeps us from being so bored we log off early.

Before I switched sites I often claimed lowering camscore just to escape silence. I'd feel like I must be doing something wrong. After admitting this to many it helped, but silence still gets very awkward, and I hate feeling like a billboard. I hate spam, whether it's on sites like twitter mail or just talking about stuff I offer, but at least I feel I might get more chatters or feel like I'm working.

The hardest part of camming I think is the need to self-motivate yourself to be entertaining to people who just may not find you that way or at least not tell you. I read members saying rent is a pretty good self-motivator, but well, if it were a motivator for sticking it out when silent I wouldn't also be working at Target.
 
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VeronicaChaos said:
I feel like I repeat myself a lot saying this, but man, if I had a token for every time I hear about a guest or basic posting a model's real name in her chatroom...

It's not just about "not letting freeloaders" talk. It's a safety measure as well. The chances of someone you know in real life posting personal information in your chatroom is so much higher if you let basics and guests talk.


Veronica I understand and totally get your point, but when you cut to the core any member, be it a "freeloader", another model, or a premium member, can find personal info on just about anyone on the 'net. You're correct, security should be a model's top priority; and if a visitor to your room goes over the line you definitely reserve the right to deal with that situation as you will. I believe I've told you before via pm that I wish you all the best in the world, and I sincerely mean that (if I haven't then I'm certainly doing so now!) I consider you one of the most successful mfc models and I can only imagine that a conservative guess on the tally of visitors to your room on any night numbers well into the hundreds, if not a thousand or more; I definitely see muting members in your situation.
But there are also those models who don't draw those numbers, mute everyone except premiums and can't understand why they cant draw huge visitors. Yes, MFC is a money making business, I get that; but it's also (for better or for worse) a social site with the word "Free" in the title. This is only my opinion mind you, but i dont understand why models who are very liberal muting their visitors (paying members or not) can't understand why no one is chatting in their room. :twocents-02cents:
 
I am only a regular in a few rooms and talk both private and public... though private messages are not suitable for public (as it's about our lives) and I note the public chat depends entirely upon who (or which regulars) are in there.

But I have been in one room recently which I have revisited - her name is now boo bear or something. She is utterly adorable and talks non stop - as do her regulars.

Made me think - why does everyone talk so much in her room? What's the difference? I've a TINY sample size, so may be utterly wrong :D

The thing i notice is that she talks about her life/friends/parents/everything. Likewise, the girls I chat to via pm rather than their room is down to us talking about our personal lives.

Draw conclusions or add observations about places where chatting works... compared to not working.
 
For me, social anxiety. When I join a new room, I just don't know what to say. And since I am accustomed to people looking at me strangely when I talk IRL, I tend to shy away from doing it online too. I tend to wait quite a while to gauge the model and the others in the room before I talk. But if I know for sure I won't be chatting, lately I have been watching as a guest, logging it to tip now and then, and then running back to guest mode. :lol:
 
Long post ahead;

TL:DR Silence is the norm on the net, and its safer on MFC.

I think the reasons mentioned are all big factors especially the no sound, cause of work or watching multiple models

But I think it is important to understand its the nature of the internet. Take ACF among registered user less than 11% have 10 or more posts, 75% have 0 or 1. That doesn't include all the guests.
It is rare to find a Youtube video with 1% as many comments as views a typical number is 300x more views than comments.
Go back and count the number of unique people who have responded to your twitter posts in the last week or month, now eliminate your regulars and fellow models. I bet the number is less than 1% of your followers even if you've ask a question.

The internet is still far more of a passive media experience like TV than people realize, in many respects its basically TV with 10 million channels. So don't feel bad putting on show for 100 people with 1 talker, it's normal.

I think there is some unique factors with respect to MFC. I have had a few PM conversations with guys who basically never chat in public, so some of this is their comments and most my wild ass guesses. I think two big reasons are.

A. We are here to be entertained and turned on and not interact. Certainly for most of the 80% of the folks who are basics and guests, they really are watching MFC to get off, it's true for many premiums also. Not only is one hand occupied making typing tough, but when watching the naked girl fuck herself with a dildo the brain isn't thinking of conversations. If you aren't naked then good chance we aren't paying close attention. The live aspects of MFC is just as much of an attraction as the interactive part. Will she get caught in the librar?, stick the dildo in her ass? On the entertainment side, what crazy shit will the ventriloquist dummy say next? and cruelly will she go on a rant cause nobody is tipping or talking?, its live so we don't know. For many guys none of this experience is really enhanced by engaging in conversation. At is heart porn is voyeuristic experience so not a big surprise that conversation is unimportant to so many.

B. Silence is safer.
1. Talking means tipping. I know all the girls say you want talkers just as much tippers. Still if message is freeloaders are bad and you should pay for the show, then I feel a guilty not tipping. I doubt I'm alone in that feeling. It's human nature when making a social faux pas to hide in the corner. I know that I notice ChattyChad who is in a girls room talking all the time but never tipping a lot more than LurkingLuke even if Luke spends more time. Now models are more aware of lurkers than I am , but I still think if a model is going to have "I fucking hate freeloaders day" that most of the time Chad is the person who is going bare her wrath if not on cam, than on twitter or someplace else.
2. Starting conversations on MFC is really awkward. IRL, if a guy sees an attractive woman. A normal conversation includes questions like: " what's your name, where do you live, what school do you go to, what's your job, do you have a boyfriend, will you go out with me?" Pretty much all of these questions are verboten on MFC. (If you don't believe me go back and read the annoying things members do, pet peeve yo, WTF and LOL members thread etc.). Now generally sexual oriented questions (which aren't typical in early IRL conversation) are ok, but the models reactions varies widely. One girl maybe fine with being asked about anal, but asking about boob size is annoying, another has the complete opposite reaction. You rack up 3 or so of these annoying questions, and you are well on the way to being banned. It is much safer to let some other guy ask the questions. AFAIK Ithe only safe topics, are music, movies, or TV that model is familiar with. (Ok I exaggerate a bit.)
3. Most conversations on MFC are pretty inane and reflect badly on the participants. The forum is filled with tens of thousands of examples. " Better to remain silent and let everyone think you are fool, than to open your mouth (keyboard) and remove all doubt." i.e. your social anxiety is justified.
4. Somebody you care about maybe watching. Just yesterday my twitter had announcement from yet another model that if she saw a member behaving badly in a models room she banned you in her room. Ah great not only do I have to worry about pissing this model off, but who know who is lurking. Ah fuck it, I'll just fap.
 
There are many reasons that they may not be talking.

  • They have multiple model windows open.
  • Typing is more attention demanding than talking.
  • They do not want to be friends.
  • They are busy.
  • They get banned whenever they try to talk.
  • They are shy, and will only talk to your helper in PMs after MFC gives them some kind of marker to let people know who they are.
  • They are jacking it.
  • They have you muted to keep people from knowing what they are watching.
  • They speak another language.
  • They are embarrassed by their grammar and spelling.
  • They have nothing in common with you.
  • They have nothing to say.

While I am much more talkative in person or on Skype I try to make some kind of chit chat happen. I am not going to lie though, I hate typing and some days I just look with envy at the silent randoms. Maybe one day I will give in to the silence.
 
LacieLaPlante said:
I think the worst part is saying goodnight because no one is talking and suddenly out of the woodwork, everyone is there with idle chat to keep me there. Where were you when I was awkwardly floundering? Just waiting for me to explode?
Extremely awkward when this happens with tipping, too. Officially decide to call it a night and cancel a countdown, then a handful of people toss a tip. What to do then? Aside from panic because you still want to leave but feel bad about doing so, now.
 
AmberCutie said:
LacieLaPlante said:
I think the worst part is saying goodnight because no one is talking and suddenly out of the woodwork, everyone is there with idle chat to keep me there. Where were you when I was awkwardly floundering? Just waiting for me to explode?
Extremely awkward when this happens with tipping, too. Officially decide to call it a night and cancel a countdown, then a handful of people toss a tip. What to do then? Aside from panic because you still want to leave but feel bad about doing so, now.
Oh, yeah...I feel a model's pain in that case...and it happens too often. I do like to sometime give a "goodnight tip" but try to remember to say goodnight in the tip note, and only hope she doesn't think I'm trying to make her stay.
 
In my experiences models who can talk, and get others to talk, are the superstars of this world. They are as rare as they are skilled and this usually results in rooms with good numbers of talkers.
They tend to follow through on first meetings, approach/ follow/ back members they like, reward the things they enjoy about their members, keep communication lines open, anticipate requests, use small talk to bridge silences, and have a good range of communication styles. They also set boundaries in appropriate ways that members can respect.

In simple terms when a premium talks to a model on MFC it tends to be a form of committment, not to spending but to an interest in her. When we are silent we are uncommitted to interacting with the model. (Basics and guests don't feel this way)
For myself when I am silent I am usually looking for a way into the conversation, perhaps studying what is appropriate behaviour in the model's room, at times just waiting to see what happens, or maybe just waiting for some sign that the model is worth interacting with.
Think most of the responses here cover the reasons for our silences well.

I am pretty comfortable talking, in fact usually too much (PM or Public). So often as the only talker it can feel like alot of work to have some fun with the model of your choice. It can be painful to watch, and be a part of, when the model can't encourage this silence to be broken. As members we can only play our part to help, spend a few tokens and some public chat time to help our favourites become more approachable.

In general silence on our part is inappropriate, I think the minimum conversation on our part should include, a hello, some indication on our reason for the visit (can be just an emote/ gif), and a goodbye (i.e. "Hello", "Like what you are doing now", "Goodbye"). It is up to the model to decide if she wants to encourage your reason for the visit from that point on. Silence is just too cryptic on our part, models deserve some indication from members on what we want from them, even if it is only subtle.
 
JimsX said:
For me, social anxiety. When I join a new room, I just don't know what to say. And since I am accustomed to people looking at me strangely when I talk IRL, I tend to shy away from doing it online too. I tend to wait quite a while to gauge the model and the others in the room before I talk. But if I know for sure I won't be chatting, lately I have been watching as a guest, logging it to tip now and then, and then running back to guest mode. :lol:

This pretty much sums it up for me too. And even when I'm a regular in a models room, sometimes my introverted side takes over and I just lurk and limit my interaction to tipping now and then, because I dislike the small talk and think for myself, I have nothing to contribute to a discussion in the room, although the model might think otherwise.
 
Hi,
Yeap, ha, In the spirit of the thread, No talk, i will comment, (but most of the reasons i or anyone do not talk in public chat are covered daily)

You see her, wow she is pretty, but fuck , why type everyone tells her, so why tell her again. emm teh weather is nice)) I am tired, this keyboard sucks, i need to read this dumb report but i can see a pretty girl.. i do not understand your language, i would joke, but i do not know what to poke fun at because i do not know what type of sarcasm to use. this is the non sexy part of the program, tips are inserted for the wankers,,handicapped with one hand type styles , mmmmmmm

I think the no talk has been learned. The no talk i dont have commitment. tips or time. and most likely not the proper place to discuss how to fix a broken lamp, or war history, or Mcdonalds ads.. or college football scores.. all good topics. The topic is boobs for 100..Jack.)

You have to talk , You only get what you put in. It has been said before, but talk to no one if you have to. No. talking about no one talking does not count, or talking about why no tips. any other form of reverse psychology, it gets boring.

Yes, i wade thru old jokes, yawn, but new members want to tell them the same as i did when i first started cam land utopia.
so no comments from me. )

fuck it is hard to talk, i love to cam to cam, and dance goofy props, big smiles, draw funny pics, cook, shower, all just plain silliness. You work, so your time is important. but fuck three girls watching , i get worn out, and time flys , i need to sleep))

all in all, just keep talking, gain knowledge beyond,, i need help, this topic brings out the comments, try it, the guys will not stop telling you how to cam...hahaha...it is a hard job to have fun all the time, so dance a dance , sing a song. some strange guy will talk to you i promise..))))) i ment a nice guy who tips millions, ofc ...

if you are thinking wtf,, then yes, Premiums try talking stupid in chat,, others will make fun of you, it will help the model..guys .give them something to talk about, i guess)))) Just do not spam, it gets old and repetitive .
 
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Ok, I want to try approaching this another way. Not so much why do members not talk, but what would get them to talk more? I figure most would jump in if the model or another member said something that the shyer member felt safe commenting to.

Since it's the members who are the quiet ones for this topic, I say let's concentrate on what the modal needs to do. I would say she should fill out her profile with her interests, but let's face it many don't read profiles. I still think it's an excellent thing to do though. Maybe there's a favorite movie/book you can gab about.

I know a lot of models tag ACF to find one another...maybe people can talk about threads they found interesting here.

One thing I like to do is if it's quiet I use http://www.stumbleupon.com this has been a major lifesaver to my room, since I hate talking about daily life...since I don't have a life being a total homebody other than going to work.

I plugged in my interests ages ago (porn is also allowed, and you can make it to where audio/video don't play) then while I'm on cam I'll occasionally say hey found this Idk if you guys are into it, but yeah...here ya go.

I think the hardest part for me is beginning conversation. I'm great at commenting to things after it's started, and can keep it going, but that initial bit is so hard.
 
I don't talk much, if at all, in public chatrooms. No desire to socialize or make friends while I'm at camsites. I'm there to see naked women ya know, my experiences are usually just "I'll give you money and you'll dance for me monkey, dance" but sometimes I want to talk more but can't because the conversation is old man talk or painfully unfunny mfc member jokes that I just don't care for. So I stay silent until private and then talk too much.
 
Okay, some of the things I'm about to list have been touched upon in other posts, but here's what comes to mind:

Shyness - I actually do talk in MFC chat because I like to talk and find it less intimidating than in person, but for sure some members will still feel inhibited.

Don't want to say stupid shit, things everyone says - Sometimes I'm quiet when I just don't have anything to say. Seems like some people talk just to talk and they're annoying as fuck to me. I don't know, maybe that talk is better than nothing from the model point of view, but it isn't from mine. And yes, a nice compliment is nice, but some guys go overboard, which is also grating. Some also think "I would wreck that ass" counts as conversation. To me, it counts as cause for a restraining order.

Pressure to tip - In a slow room (unless you're a regular), it's kind of scary to talk because it calls attention to you. I typically don't hang around if I don't plan to tip, but even so, there have been times when I've felt pressure to tip a lot more than I intended to because the focus is on me as the one person talking. Most likely, the model appreciates what I have already done, but it still can feel to me like it's up to me to save the day, which isn't something I can do on a regular basis. People not tipping at all could certainly feel exposed as non-tippers if they're one of the few voices out there. I understand that someone who just adds decent chat to a quiet room can be valuable to a model, but to be honest, as a tipper, when someone talks his ass off and doesn't tip, in my head I'm thinking, that guy should either tip or shut up.

During a show - I'd actually be interested to hear how models feel about people trying to chat with them when they're doing a show. I intentionally don't try to engage a model in conversation if she appears "busy." I would guess that that isn't a good time. "Hi babe, do u play League of Legends?" seems out of place if the model's got a dildo in her mouth.

Just not interested in the current topic - Obviously I don't know what does or does not interest strangers, but I know that I'll be more likely to get involved in the conversation if it's something interesting to me. Probably you've thought of this already, but if nobody is responding to a topic, try to think of something else that might interest someone. If most of the people in the room are strangers to you, finding what grabs their interest could be a trial-and-error kind of thing.

Not interested in interacting in the first place - MFC's marketing strategy is centered around getting a lot of traffic. They make no attempt to filter it, so a large percentage of people are going to be people just looking for porn (which they think of as just something to watch) and who never had any intention of tipping. I get that if feels frustrating to see a big number in your room count and yet not be hearing from very many of them at all, but that's just the way it's going to be with this kind of marketing. The strategy does work pretty well, overall, but I think as models, you just need to accept that the number of people you see is much larger than the number of people who might engage with you. For all intents and purposes, the rest of them might as well be bots, and you can't win over a bot no matter how great you are. I realize that doesn't solve your problem, but at least it might lower your frustration level a little. If you've got 1000 accounts in your room, don't be frustrated about the 950 of them that are never going to benefit any model ever. Do what you can with the 50 remaining. If they're not responding either, okay, that's frustrating, but at least you're not burdening yourself with the impossible expectation that you can get a response from the many that will never respond to anyone.
 
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