Would you be willing to date a guy who`s never been sexually active?

[Guy]

Just curious.

 

[Bocefish]

You're not my type.

 

[Emberblaze]

Yup.
Men that have no idea what they are doing are way easier to train.

 

[asia_lynn]

Honestly, I thought yes at one time but the guy who I was interested in was (in my opinion) too old to be so inexperienced. There were no religious or moral reasons, he was just shy and awkward I think. But he was so clingy and irrational that I ended up ending things before we got anywhere, which caused him to scream and cry and act like a very young teenager.

In my limited experience, people who don't have sexual experience haven't experienced adult relationships and adult relationships are what help us to mature mentally and emotionally. I don't think I would ever put myself in that position again after my experience

 

[Guy]

Honestly, I thought yes at one time but the guy who I was interested in was (in my opinion) too old to be so inexperienced. There were no religious or moral reasons, he was just shy and awkward I think. But he was so clingy and irrational that I ended up ending things before we got anywhere, which caused him to scream and cry and act like a very young teenager.

In my limited experience, people who don't have sexual experience haven't experienced adult relationships and adult relationships are what help us to mature mentally and emotionally. I don't think I would ever put myself in that position again after my experience

How old was he?

 

[asia_lynn]

How old was he?

He was 28

 

[Guy]

He was 28

Was he new to dating?

 

[asia_lynn]

Was he new to dating?

He was quite unwilling to go into details, honestly. I think he was embarrassed, but there was no need to be, it is what it is, so him being so secretive about it added to my feelings of him being very immature.

my understanding of the situation was that he had had a few relationships but they were so short lived that they didn't go anywhere sexually. I believe they were also few and far between

 

[Goblin]

If a guy hasn't been sexually active by a certain age, other than religion, there's probably a deeper reason

That deeper reason is probably more likely to hinder a relationship than them purely being a virgin

 

[Mintx]

Yep! I don't mind experience levels, as long as he makes it clear what he is comfortable with.

 

[Bocefish]

 

[raine]

Just curious.

yes ofc

 

[Fatquack]

Everybody has to start somewhere.

 

[Tartan]

I'm not sure why it would matter if it was guys, girls or hungry hungry hippos ok maybe not that last part but i'm not sure you should judge how date worthy people are by their sexual experience unless you're looking for a fling or fuckbuddy

 

[Booty_4U]

There's nothing wrong with adults who happen to be "virgins"! (The concept of "virginity" is a social construct that needs to be retired) There could be soo many reasons why they haven't had sex - sometimes it's as simple as they just didn't have anyone to hook up with yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I've dated multiple "virgins" and I'd rather be with someone who has no experience but is excited to learn, than some fuckboy who ignores my pleasure LOL
The only problem with adult "virgins" is that other people judge them! Society/mainstream media make us think we're not normal if we don't perfectly fit into these ridiculous roles they've created for us. I think the pressure to become sexually active for men is "toxic masculinity". As if you're not a real man until you have sex

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/the-problem-with-male-virginity/

https://goodmenproject.com/sex-relationships/disrupting-the-fear-of-virginity-dg/

 

[Emberblaze]

There's nothing wrong with adults who happen to be "virgins"! (The concept of "virginity" is a social construct that needs to be retired) There could be soo many reasons why they haven't had sex - sometimes it's as simple as they just didn't have anyone to hook up with yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I've dated multiple "virgins" and I'd rather be with someone who has no experience but is excited to learn, than some fuckboy who ignores my pleasure LOL
The only problem with adult "virgins" is that other people judge them! Society/mainstream media make us think we're not normal if we don't perfectly fit into these ridiculous roles they've created for us. I think the pressure to become sexually active for men is "toxic masculinity". As if you're not a real man until you have sex

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/the-problem-with-male-virginity/

https://goodmenproject.com/sex-relationships/disrupting-the-fear-of-virginity-dg/

I really like this reply.
Especially the part about preferring to be with a newb than a fuck boy.

My partner is very selective about who he sleeps with and didn't have a ton of partners before me. So he was shy and really wanted me to show him what I liked. Now he's like the king of pleasing me without even needing to fuck me.

Other partners I had in the past thought they knew everything and were King of the orgasms and would be shitty to me when I refused to pretend to cum to all of their lame porn moves that they swore made all of their exes cum. Or things that legitimately made one gf they had cum so they thought it had to work on all women.

I've heard a ton of women in my lifetime complain that guys didn't intuitively know how to make them cum but that idea that guys should just know is bullshit. Every woman I have ever fucked needed something different to cum. We really need to learn about our own bodies and find out what makes us cum so we can take control of our own sexualities and never have to wonder if we are broken when some fuck boy can't make us cum.

And if we do that and can become comfortable talking (or maybe texting if you're shy, or finding porn that represents what you like to show to your partner) than their inexperience is irrelevant.

I would much rather fuck 40 year old virgins for the rest of my life than EVER have to endure another idiot that wants to argue with me mid fuck about what I need to do to make myself cum.

 

[BiancaBaker]

My husband has only slept with like 4-5 girls MAYBE . He is the BEST in bed hands down no comparison. Experience does not matter. Penis size does.

 

[asia_lynn]

There's nothing wrong with adults who happen to be "virgins"! (The concept of "virginity" is a social construct that needs to be retired) There could be soo many reasons why they haven't had sex - sometimes it's as simple as they just didn't have anyone to hook up with yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I've dated multiple "virgins" and I'd rather be with someone who has no experience but is excited to learn, than some fuckboy who ignores my pleasure LOL
The only problem with adult "virgins" is that other people judge them! Society/mainstream media make us think we're not normal if we don't perfectly fit into these ridiculous roles they've created for us. I think the pressure to become sexually active for men is "toxic masculinity". As if you're not a real man until you have sex

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/the-problem-with-male-virginity/

https://goodmenproject.com/sex-relationships/disrupting-the-fear-of-virginity-dg/

I think that being a virgin isn't necessarily the problem per se- more so that usually someone is a virgin as an full because they haven't been able to handle an adult relationship long enough to have the chance.

Now I'd totally be willing to sleep with someone in this situation... Everyone's gotta start somewhere. But I wouldn't be interested in a relationship with someone who's never had a serious one. I think that's what it comes down to. That being said, I agree with you for the most part and think the concept of virginity is silly. Its just that I equate virginity with emotional immaturtim and while this isnti always the case, it usually is.

 

[JickyJuly]

I wouldn't. I've already lived a lifetime of partnership. I don't have that to offer someone, and I wouldn't feel right being someone's first sex experience if that was all it would be.

 

[Goblin]

There's nothing wrong with adults who happen to be "virgins"! (The concept of "virginity" is a social construct that needs to be retired) There could be soo many reasons why they haven't had sex - sometimes it's as simple as they just didn't have anyone to hook up with yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I think it depends if they're involuntary celibate or not

There's totally nothing wrong with being a virgin within itself, but if you're 30+ it does suggest there is something else at play

Anxiety disorder, inherently poor socially, trust issues etc

That isn't to say it's wrong to have any of the above or they make you an inadequate human being, but none them are ideal things to have if they hold you back from what you would like to do

 

[Lollie Berrymilk]

Yes! I was a late bloomer, so I'm definitely not gonna judge anyone else. As long as they don't judge me for having two sexual dysfunctions

 

[Violet Dawn]

I've never done it, but I'm willing to try it.

I've been with men who have been with multiple women and sucked. And I've been with guys (teens as a teen) who have been with little to no girls and honestly I don't know. Most people kinda suck in my experience unless they're willing to try.

 

[Marceline]

Part of me says no, simply because I've never been with a virgin before and I don't think I'd feel right being someone's first. However, it would be nice to be with someone who didn't have any sort of extra baggage that sometimes comes along with exes and people they have hooked up with in the past. That's all concerning feelings and stuff, though. I wouldn't mind it on the whole "Oh, it's not going to be good sex because he isn't experienced" level. Sex usually isn't the absolute best the first time you are with a new partner, regardless of past experience, because it takes time to get to learn what each other likes and dislikes.

 

[KylieJacobs]

Sure! I actually took a long time friend's v-card.

 

[Guy]

There's nothing wrong with adults who happen to be "virgins"! (The concept of "virginity" is a social construct that needs to be retired) There could be soo many reasons why they haven't had sex - sometimes it's as simple as they just didn't have anyone to hook up with yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I've dated multiple "virgins" and I'd rather be with someone who has no experience but is excited to learn, than some fuckboy who ignores my pleasure LOL
The only problem with adult "virgins" is that other people judge them! Society/mainstream media make us think we're not normal if we don't perfectly fit into these ridiculous roles they've created for us. I think the pressure to become sexually active for men is "toxic masculinity". As if you're not a real man until you have sex

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/the-problem-with-male-virginity/

https://goodmenproject.com/sex-relationships/disrupting-the-fear-of-virginity-dg/

Why is it that some men seek having sex with women that are "virgins"?

 

[Violet Dawn]

Why is it that some men seek having sex with women that are "virgins"?

I think it's because they are possessive and feel being the only guy inside something is a privilege.

Or because they think it feels better?

I had an ex who loved the fact I was a virgin and he had slept with half the town. To him, he felt like it meant he owned me.

Even after we broke up, I slept with someone else he said "please say he didn't go inside you" I'm like "Why is it your business" he proceeded to tell me he was done with me if the guy "went inside."

He acted like the fact he was my first meant he literally owned my body.

I don't know not all guys are like that, I just feel like seeking out virgins for anything other than a kink (granted, they treat them well) is creepy and predatory.

 

[Guy]

I don't know not all guys are like that, I just feel like seeking out virgins for anything other than a kink (granted, they treat them well) is creepy and predatory.

Yeah. Its always grossed me out.

 

[Booty_4U]

I think that being a virgin isn't necessarily the problem per se- more so that usually someone is a virgin as an full because they haven't been able to handle an adult relationship long enough to have the chance.

Now I'd totally be willing to sleep with someone in this situation... Everyone's gotta start somewhere. But I wouldn't be interested in a relationship with someone who's never had a serious one. I think that's what it comes down to. That being said, I agree with you for the most part and think the concept of virginity is silly. Its just that I equate virginity with emotional immaturtim and while this isnti always the case, it usually is.

I've known multiple adult virgins who had relationships without sex that lasted years. Many of the virgins I talked to didn't lack maturity, but had basically given up on the prospect of getting laid (partly due to the stigma against adult male virgins), saying things like "I've been a virgin for so long that I guess I'll just remain a virgin forever"

 

[EmmaStoner]

I'd be willing to try but I really struggle to tell a man if he's not doing what I need so it would probably take a lot on his end to make me feel comfortable with voicing my needs especially in regards to his inexperience and how it might affect me.

 

[asia_lynn]

I've known multiple adult virgins who had relationships without sex that lasted years. Many of the virgins I talked to didn't lack maturity, but had basically given up on the prospect of getting laid (partly due to the stigma against adult male virgins), saying things like "I've been a virgin for so long that I guess I'll just remain a virgin forever"

That's fair. Its not my experience but I don't doubt that the situation exists. I'd be fine with it in that case, it's just hard to see past my own experiences.