Complicated situation with a member

[amandastar]

Hey yall. So I cam on MFC for a while and there is this member who really liked me and he became a regular and has been spending a really good amount on me for 1 month now. He said if I wanted to meet him in Vegas for a weekend in March, I said yes absolutely (i lied because i wanted to keep him coming and take his $). He booked the hotel and etc, he is REALLY expecting for me to be there in 3 weeks but I am actually not going, and I don't know how to say that I'm not going, plus i really don't wanna lose him because he is a good spender. What should I tell him?!!!? I am thinking about saying I am positive for COVID but I don't know if that's a good lie.

1 - if you're going to say "omggg ur a horrible person you shouldn't lie for them!!!" don't even comment below because i really don't care, he is 75 trying to meet a 22 year old, our age difference is BIG and he's got some perversity in his mind for sure. Plus he is retired, I can see that money isn't really an issue for him so I just want to keep getting his $ as long as I can

 

[AmberCutie]

Oof. Obviously we're all going to tell you that you should never say yes to an invitation like that unless you're planning to actually meet up and hang out with members and you've completely thought out all of the details/pros/cons of it.

You're not a horrible person, but it was definitely a mistake.

Honesty is probably the best way to go. Tell him you said yes not realizing how much trouble it would be for you to go through with it and apologize for it.

If you continue stringing him along and lying to him about it, then we will certainly call you a horrible person.

 

[Nigerian Prince]

Hey yall. So I cam on MFC for a while and there is this member who really liked me and he became a regular and has been spending a really good amount on me for 1 month now. He said if I wanted to meet him in Vegas for a weekend in March, I said yes absolutely (i lied because i wanted to keep him coming and take his $). He booked the hotel and etc, he is REALLY expecting for me to be there in 3 weeks but I am actually not going, and I don't know how to say that I'm not going, plus i really don't wanna lose him because he is a good spender. What should I tell him?!!!? I am thinking about saying I am positive for COVID but I don't know if that's a good lie.

1 - if you're going to say "omggg ur a horrible person you shouldn't lie for them!!!" don't even comment below because i really don't care, he is 75 trying to meet a 22 year old, our age difference is BIG and he's got some perversity in his mind for sure. Plus he is retired, I can see that money isn't really an issue for him so I just want to keep getting his $ as long as I can

Uh... if you are old enough to cam you should be old enough to know not to lie about something like that. That being said I would just tell them you didn't really think about it it thoroughly at the time, and after reflection you realized that meeting someone in the middle of a pandemic is not ideal.

 

[AudriTwo]

I agree with amber. Honesty is the best policy. Apologize for agreeing and tell him you don't want to after you gave it more thought. If he begs and tries to guilt you into still going, stick to your boundaries. Tell him no. Some members need to hear that.

You may lose him as a customer, but it happens. Regulars aren't forever, and you cannot always say everything they want to hear if it's something that makes you uncomfortable or flat out don't want to do.

There are models who get away with stringing their regs along with lies and false promises, but sometimes it can blow up in their face. As in the guy turns jaded because he is hurt and tries to get revenge. Like spamming your chat that you are a scammer. Or going to reddit and forums like this to bad mouth you.

It's not a hustle I recommend.

 

[Tinydickman]

You lied to him. Respect is a two way thing

he maybe old but he’s probably lonely and you took advantage of him and misled him. I’m sorry I only sympathise with him on this. Tell him the truth and lose him or continue to mislead the poor man and manipulate him further and milk him for every last dime he has left from his retirement savings

 

[MarieElise]

Yay for cam models that do things like this... you make the rest of our lives so much easier! (sarcasm).
The long-term sustainability of making decisions to string people along like this, in this field, is not gonna work in your favor.
I don't care if you want to hear this or not. Models that do stuff like this make it so much harder for models like me who are honest with their boundaries and have to deal with the fallout that comes from this crap! In the future try to think of more than just yourself. It's not your place in life to decide what a 75 y/o man deserves and doesn't deserve. So predatory!

Tell him you lied because you felt entitled, weak and fearful of losing his money and that you have no interest in meeting up with him.

 

[pickthebrain]

I was about to start my thread when I saw this hahaI knew a cam girl who did exactly this and swindled some serious money...my 2 cents if worth anything, don't feel guilty. Unless he is a millionaire or a dashingly handsome 70 year old he should know you cant be interested in him. His fault for living this fantasy. The covid story could let you keep your big spender around.

 

[CheeseMoon]

[...] and he's got some perversity in his mind for sure.

Relax. I think both the con artist and the pervert will get a serving of just desserts.

 

[GothHostess]

Like AudriTwo said, regulars aren't forever. Unfortunately, with the ones that spend a lot on you and have the idea that you will meet up in person someday and be real life lovers - they DEFINITELY have a shelf life, because eventually they will realize that you aren't going to meet up with them and be their girlfriend.

Unfortunately, this kind of thing will probably definitely shorten the shelf life of any customer it's easier for them to live the fantasy that maybe, someday, you two might really meet up, if you DON'T make actual plans. In the future when this happens with others (because it will) you can definitely so no without being mean - I promise it won't be the first time a camgirl has kindly shut down their attempts to meet There's lots of ways you can cutely, sweetly say you wouldn't meet up - "oh my gosh, I really like you but I would be sooo scared to meet someone off the internet! I'm old fashioned like that I'm so thankful we get to spend this time together online and you log on just to see me!"

 

[amandastar]

You lied to him. Respect is a two way thing

he maybe old but he’s probably lonely and you took advantage of him and misled him. I’m sorry I only sympathise with him on this. Tell him the truth and lose him or continue to mislead the poor man and manipulate him further and milk him for every last dime he has left from his retirement savings

so for you it's normal a 71 year old be interested in a 20yr old? a little bit weird imo. I dont sympathise with him on this. In my mind, i despise perverts especially very old men interested in young girls.

a +70 year old interested in a 20 year old dont you think he is also attracted to high school girls? I think very much so

 

[amandastar]

Yay for cam models that do things like this... you make the rest of our lives so much easier! (sarcasm).
The long-term sustainability of making decisions to string people along like this, in this field, is not gonna work in your favor.
I don't care if you want to hear this or not. Models that do stuff like this make it so much harder for models like me who are honest with their boundaries and have to deal with the fallout that comes from this crap! In the future try to think of more than just yourself. It's not your place in life to decide what a 75 y/o man deserves and doesn't deserve. So predatory!

Tell him you lied because you felt entitled, weak and fearful of losing his money and that you have no interest in meeting up with him.

It's easy for you to say that when you live in the U.S.A and in case you lose a wealthy member or lose earnings on camsites you can just get another normal job and you will get paid thousands. Not the reality for us in other countries, we have to worry and keep members as long as we can, and as I said above, I don't think it's nice for a 70 year old be interested sexually in a 20 year old. A little bit pedo imo and they don't deserve respect

 

[amandastar]

I was about to start my thread when I saw this hahaI knew a cam girl who did exactly this and swindled some serious money...my 2 cents if worth anything, don't feel guilty. Unless he is a millionaire or a dashingly handsome 70 year old he should know you cant be interested in him. His fault for living this fantasy. The covid story could let you keep your big spender around.

yes exactly these are camsites not freaking online hookers. He came to my chat on the first day offering me $2000 and asking for my contact when its in the rules they aren't supposed to do any of that. His fault for living this dumb fantasy. This guy has money I ain't gonna make him go broke or anything for a few hundreds a week

 

[AmberCutie]

I was trying not to be harsh on my first reply, but it's models with a mindset like this that create a bad stigma on the whole industry.

 

[Nigerian Prince]

so for you it's normal a 71 year old be interested in a 20yr old? a little bit weird imo. I dont sympathise with him on this. In my mind, i despise perverts especially very old men interested in young girls.

a +70 year old interested in a 20 year old dont you think he is also attracted to high school girls? I think very much so

If you despise them that much you shouldn't cam, because it's these older customers that make up the majority of the earnings of most models. There's aren't that many 20 somethings with spare money lying around to spend on a luxury like camming.

 

[amandastar]

If you despise them that much you shouldn't cam, because it's these older customers that make up the majority of the earnings of most models. There's aren't that many 20 somethings with spare money lying around to spend on a luxury like camming.

I know this. I cam to take all of their $. Thats what they deserve. They are nasty

 

[AudriTwo]

It's easy for you to say that when you live in the U.S.A and in case you lose a wealthy member or lose earnings on camsites you can just get another normal job and you will get paid thousands. Not the reality for us in other countries, we have to worry and keep members as long as we can, and as I said above, I don't think it's nice for a 70 year old be interested sexually in a 20 year old. A little bit pedo imo and they don't deserve respect

usa isn't this great country of wealth like some people like to think. we are in a depression and our unemployment rate is over 10 million. the job market is sparse and more competitive now than ever. also our minimum wage is $7.25/hr so the chances of you getting a job with zero experience and paid thousands is ummm preposterous. our minimum wage hasn't been raised since 2009. people are struggling more than ever. last year we were dealing with an eviction crisis. we have gotten barely any aid from our government.

seriously have some responsibility. sure yes this elderly man shouldn't be using a camsite like an escort catalog, but that is your job to teach him. it's so easy to say no. you are an adult, and an older gentleman being sexually attracted to you isn't wrong. YOU ARE NOT A MINOR. now you are vilifying this man because you took his money on false pretense.

welcome to camming bb. time to grow up, create some fucking boundaries, and stop acting like a fucking victim.

and yeah

 

[AmberCutie]

Are you fucking kidding me?

Both accounts involved in this are banned. It was a member [edit - apparently a male CB model?] making up stories on an alternate account.

HOLY SHIT I HATE PEOPLE.

fuck the fuck off!

 

[Marceline]

you are an adult, and an older gentleman being sexually attracted to you isn't wrong. YOU ARE NOT A MINOR. now you are vilifying this man because you took his money on false pretense.

This. A million times this. Calling someone a pedo or insinuating that they are attracted to minors with absolutely no proof other than “well, I’m younger than them and they are attracted to me” is beyond fucked up. Something like that shouldn’t be said lightly.

I agree with everyone else, also. Cam models who do stuff like this and say this kind of stuff makes everyone else look bad and makes our jobs a lot harder.

 

[yummybrownfox]

It doesn't matter how many times I post on forums that I think the "Just lie and rinse him for his money!" tactic is a terrible idea, and that it can seriously backfire on you...[/i]especially[/i] if you pull this stunt on some guy who happens to be unhinged as it is.....

Models are gonna do what they wanna do. Just like some models will continue accepting PayPal payments for Skype shows, no matter how many times we say no, please don't do that (PayPal is anti-adult).

Yeah, you're probably about to lose this guy as a customer, and he's probably gonna rant about this to others. But like the other posters said, just tell him now that you're sorry but you're not going to be meeting up with him...and that you never should've said you will. Don't continue lying to this dude just to fill your pockets. Consider this a lesson learned, and don't use this tactic anymore.

"

 

[MarieElise]

@AmberCutie Am I understanding correctly that this was not in fact actually a model, but a troll wasting everyone's time? And that troll was another person who was already a member on this forum?

Sorry you had to deal w this Amber, that's twisted and weird af.
ETA; And GOOD fucking RIDDANCE to whoever that was!

 

[melanieoncam]

Are you fucking kidding me?

Both accounts involved in this are banned. It was a member [edit - apparently a male CB model?] making up stories on an alternate account.

HOLY SHIT I HATE PEOPLE.

fuck the fuck off!

God, what an asshole.

So happy you figured it out so quickly and banned the idiots.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Some people are just pathetic...

 

[AmberCutie]

God, what an asshole.

So happy you figured it out so quickly and banned the idiots.

OP has a male sounding email address and an IP address matching someone who has been a member (apparently CB male model) here for like 4 years. Red flags abound.

but a troll wasting everyone's time?

Seems so.

 

[Deleted member 57885]

I know this is a troll, but on a sidenote, I wonder if anyone has ever conducted/released some stats concerning member age on camsites. By chance, I'm in my mid 20s with a good job (software development) so I have a bit of the extra cash to spend around, which I learned is a bit unusual on a site like CB. The first thing that seems to be always said to me when I mention age is "I thought this was a site for grandpas"

Are you fucking kidding me?

Both accounts involved in this are banned. It was a member [edit - apparently a male CB model?] making up stories on an alternate account.

HOLY SHIT I HATE PEOPLE.

fuck the fuck off!

This reminds me of a person on the previous Q/A forum I admin'd at. There was a user who created probably a dozen or so accounts on various IPs and burner emails to create A LOT of these long and complicated posts about how someone was cheating on them and/or getting a messy divorce but the person still loved the spouse and wanted advice on it. They would change the age and slight details, but if you didn't notice the inconsistency, you'd waste your time trying to help.

Some people just have way too much time on their hands. Like what is the payoff for these people? Trolls often find the rage funny, but what the hell does random advice from people give them? lol

 

[MarieElise]

I know this is a troll, but on a sidenote, I wonder if anyone has ever conducted/released some stats concerning member age on camsites. By chance, I'm in my mid 20s with a good job (software development) so I have a bit of the extra cash to spend around, which I learned is a bit unusual on a site like CB. The first thing that seems to be always said to me when I mention age is "I thought this was a site for grandpas"

On streamate I usually prefer c2c, and a lot of my shorter show buyers are 20s and 30s age range. A lot of the longer show buyers are 40s, 50s, and above. So on SM there are a ton of younger guys there. But as the amounts of money being spent go up, in general, the age of the Member/ show buyer also seems to. Although there are definitely many exceptions. Just a general trend I have noticed.

I wouldn't say Grandpas though. I've only had one guy ever who looked older that 60 get a show with me. And to me 60 is pretty young.
There may be a booming 70s, 80s, 90s crowd, but if so, I'm missing that demographic completely in my fanbase.

The other stereotype I've noticed that isn't true (at least on SM) is that most guys that use cam models have some kind of physical issue attracting women. There are a ton who are super hot, and also skilled with women. A really wide variety of types of people use the services of cam and fetish models, for a wide variety of reasons. But the more middle-aged guys do tend to spend more (on average in my experience).

 

[AmberCutie]

There was a user who created probably a dozen or so accounts on various IPs and burner emails to create A LOT of these long and complicated posts

ACF has had plenty of those through the years, trust me.

 

[Deleted member 57885]

On streamate I usually prefer c2c, and a lot of my shorter show buyers are 20s and 30s age range. A lot of the longer show buyers are 40s, 50s, and above. So on SM there are a ton of younger guys there. But as the amounts of money being spent go up, in general, the age of the Member/ show buyer also seems to. Although there are definitely many exceptions. Just a general trend I have noticed.

I wouldn't say Grandpas though. I've only had one guy ever who looked older that 60 get a show with me. And to me 60 is pretty young.
There may be a booming 70s, 80s, 90s crowd, but if so, I'm missing that demographic completely in my fanbase.

That's interesting -- I wonder how much it varies per site. I'm a CB user before anywhere else, so I'm not familiar with the SM setup. I think the grandpa quotes were probably exaggerations by who said it, but the more realistic figure was probably in the 40s and up. I wouldn't be surprised (as far as token sites go) that the private buyers & and big spending regulars were more >40 while the small time tippers were <40, given the price difference.

The other stereotype I've noticed that isn't true (at least on SM) is that most guys that use cam models have some kind of physical issue attracting women. There are a ton who are super hot, and also skilled with women. A really wide variety of types of people use the services of cam and fetish models, for a wide variety of reasons. But the more middle-aged guys do tend to spend more (on average in my experience).

I can see that -- like maybe if someone has a specific thing they're looking for (aka a look / fetish / etc.), or that they want something sexual without the commitment, risk, and/or effort of getting there.

ACF has had plenty of those through the years, trust me.

I don't doubt it! I can especially only imagine some of the new-user posts that don't get approved. ACF has better mechanics I think too. For better or worse, the forum I was at had an 'post anonymous' function built in that new users could post immediately with + full media options, and after some posts get PM options. Only admins could see the anon real username ... you can imagine the unsolicited chaos. Even though this is an adult forum, and that was a "13 and up forum" (at least officially according to TOS), I'm sure I've seen less random real explicit pics/posts on here, and the userbase is hella more chill

 

[AudriTwo]

Some people just have way too much time on their hands. Like what is the payoff for these people? Trolls often find the rage funny, but what the hell does random advice from people give them? lol

the pandemic has put a damper on larping. gotta get their kicks elsewhere.

 

[yummybrownfox]

ACF has had plenty of those through the years, trust me.

The return of PunkInDrublic? Lol.

 

[Diana_Devil]

I feel really disgusted and disturbed emotionaly that such people exist and think like this in the cam world !

A cam model its a profesional individual ( or should be ) that should not judge people age , colour , race , religion !

People like OP should not be camming at all and should be not allowed to cam . Period!

And any cam model that does not have respect for the money spent in this industry should not be camming !

My husband its with 20 years older than me , that does not make him a pedo. I am an adult and grown up , and the majority of my regulars are 50 years + there is nothing wrong of being atracted in someone younger as long as it has a legal age 18+ !!!