Man Dude Bro question; How important to you is it that a cam model you see a little, once in a while, has "bedside manner"?

[MarieElise]

And it's mostly the non-tipper type making the life changing proposals lol.

lol exactly. It’s disrespectful.

 

[AussieCosplay]

M-E...
I just saw this thread and really want to reiterate that your boundaries are fucking valid.

As a more gfe chatty style model, I absolutely always end up chatting way overtime with regulars on a Skype BUT it's not expected and it's always that we're having a catch up general conversation...likely about some TV show or whatever.

Handholding and Aftercare is 100% part of our job, and has to be paid as such.
An electrician prices in the time they spend doing quotes that go nowhere, time spent explaining to the customer why they can't wire things a certain way, etc.



As for someone wanting more than you can comfortably give...

I find it helpful to try to remember that it's not just unfair to me, but also unfair to literally everyone who pays and doesn't get extra on top.



Finally I just want to add that I understand how hard it is to disappoint people while enforcing boundaries and it's something I really really struggle with and am literally in therapy to work on.
So you're not alone. It's easy to give advice, it's easy to notice when you are uncomfortable in a situation, it's almost impossible to take the necessary action.

I hope your situation resolves itself soon, as shitty as the interim may be, it'll get better.

 

[MarieElise]

Thanks @Goddess Amina Bordeaux and @AussieCosplay

Great and helpful points.
Overall this has been a good reminder and learning experience for me.
I'm usually really good with boundaries. Well the enforce part. I think I just got a bit tired, and kinda didn't notice, or take seriously stuff I should have. Now I've been paying the price for that, and I'm sure he's not.
As usually happens with these guys (the type that have these needs).
They go on their Merry way, leaving destruction in their wake (which is now officially over).
This is seriously year 1 stuff, that I learned a long time ago. I feel so stupid for having to go through it again, but atleast it's just one guy, and not a whole bushel of them.

So Pavlovian in the end.
Relearned my fucking lesson - once more.

This is the kind of stuff that makes me think I should go back on meds for ADHD, but I just don't really want to reel myself in again.

@AussieCosplay Boundaries was my hugest thing too. I've come really far with it though.
I mean he was a worthy adversary, at least it wasn't to some meat head.

 

[AussieCosplay]

Thanks @Goddess Amina Bordeaux and @AussieCosplay

Great and helpful points.
Overall this has been a good reminder and learning experience for me.
I'm usually really good with boundaries. Well the enforce part. I think I just got a bit tired, and kinda didn't notice, or take seriously stuff I should have. Now I'm paying the price for that, and I'm sure he's not.
As usually happens with these guys (the type that have these needs).
They go on their Merry way, leaving destruction in their wake (which is now officially over).
This is seriously year 1 stuff, that I learned a long time ago. I feel so stupid for having to go through it again, but atleast it's just one guy, and not a whole bushel of them.

So Pavlovian in the end.
Relearned my fucking lesson - once more.

@AussieCosplay Boundaries was my hugest thing too. I've come really far with it though.
I mean he was a worthy adversary, at least it wasn't to some meat head.

Check the private thread I just made because...might be relatable.