Question on Private C2C with Disabled Person

[Ramrodrick]

I am sure some others have had this occur but today it was my first time since I am new at Streammate. My customer was disabled and I understand that everyone has needs but is it right to do something with a disabled person. it feels bad like you might be taking advantage of them. It was very hard to communicate with them in a C2C private session since they had trouble speaking. I ended the session early because I just didn’t feel comfortable taking money from them. Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this.

 

[Vixxen81]

You encountered a new experience you would not have chosen for yourself in the real world when it comes to being sexual with a person but as a sex worker that's going to happen a lot. Your reaction isn't wrong; I think looking through a different lens is needed.

People with visible limitations often feel isolated and unwanted, or worse they feel like a burden. To have a sex worker embrace them probably means a lot to them. Physically challenged does not necessarily mean mentally challenged, even if the person has speech difficulties. Stephen Hawking was a renowned pervert who cheated on almost every partner he had and the guy had a feeding tube and a computerized voice. There was nothing wrong with his mental capacity for understanding consequences of actions.

You're probably not the first person to beg out of the session and probably won't be the last but maybe consider they trusted you in some type of way and you could have made their day a lot brighter by finishing the session.

 

[Ramrodrick]

Thanks. I bowed out but we did message afterwards and will arrange more time. It was a first experience for me and I do need to appreciate what everyone goes through. I think that is what can set me apart.

 

[Vixxen81]

Thanks. I bowed out but we did message afterwards and will arrange more time. It was a first experience for me and I do need to appreciate what everyone goes through. I think that is what can set me apart.

You said you are new so as a model with 10 years under my belt under another site, please do not invest in everyone you meet. It will kill your soul when you discover just how many people are willing to lie to you for their own disassociation from reality.

 

[Ramrodrick]

You said you are new so as a model with 10 years under my belt under another site, please do not invest in everyone you meet. It will kill your soul when you discover just how many people are willing to lie to you for their own disassociation from reality.

Absolutely understand that. Can’t grow attach. I wouldn’t say I am totally new. New to streamate but been cam modeling for 2 years.

 

[CallMeMaria]

I think you should not look at a disabled client any differently than you would a view an able bodied client - I feel it is patronising in a way to have any kind of pity over a person with a physical illness/disability.

I would be considerate and straight up ask if they would like me to make any special arrangements or accommodate to them in any way differently. In my experience most of them will say they want to be treated absolutely normally.

For many, disabled and able bodied alike, this is escapism from the real world where they cannot necessarily do the things they can achieve online with a roleplay, for example.

 

[Ramrodrick]

Maria, you are totally correct in this and I am sure it’s an escape for them which I am happy to fulfill the need. The fact that they trust me to help with that means a lot to me and something I can now reflect on based on your comment and others. I have not thought about asking if they needed any accommodations I will definitely explore that next time.

 

[Ramrodrick]

Thanks everyone for your advice today. He came back this morning and jumped right into private. We had a wonderful time and 30 minutes later we were done. I took everyone’s advice and truly appreciate all your feedback.

 

[Wuggie]

I'm happy to hear you could give this user a great experience and not be turned away from it..

it's not something I have experienced myself, but I have had customers where I felt weird doing private shows for them for other reasons before and it is sometimes a "bump" you have to get over and after the first couple of times it becomes a norm (at least it did to me and I hope it is comparable)

 

[RuthStrawberryblonde]

I'm a real life sex worker with disability clients, they are approaching you, have clicked the over 18 button, input their payment details or had someone make arrangements with their consent. Many experience difficulties including rejection, isolation, loneliness, discrimination and just want the same access to life as able individuals enjoy. I take pride in being able to provide intimacy to disability customers whatever their situation, this doesn't however mean I don't have boundaries just as I do with anyone else.

 

[Maxi]

I read an interesting article on the BBC a little while back that gave some insights into a disabled person’s visits to a sex worker:

Meet Melanie and Chayse: The disabled woman and her sex worker https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/disability-65422489

 

[RuthStrawberryblonde]

I read an interesting article on the BBC a little while back that gave some insights into a disabled person’s visits to a sex worker:

Meet Melanie and Chayse: The disabled woman and her sex worker https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/disability-65422489

Here's a specialist website for people seeking disability friendly adult services in the UK https://tlc-trust.org.uk/ but many service providers do have experience with disability clients.

On SM I have had customers tell me they have a disability when requesting C2C, for many it's very inaccessible but not everyone. Someone who is visually impaired is likely to rely heavily on sound, words, and physical touch. I say 'likely' because I never assume.

 

[JessaBella]

I am sure some others have had this occur but today it was my first time since I am new at Streammate. My customer was disabled and I understand that everyone has needs but is it right to do something with a disabled person. it feels bad like you might be taking advantage of them. It was very hard to communicate with them in a C2C private session since they had trouble speaking. I ended the session early because I just didn’t feel comfortable taking money from them. Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this.

you are justified in your feelings about your experience. it was something new for you. Disabled people do have needs, but not everyone needs to or is comfortable helping with those needs and that is okay.

I have dated someone who had CP and was in a wheelchair. I am comfortable with those who are disabled several of my customers are disabled in someway. it is not for everyone and that is okay.

 

[AudriTwo]

disabled people deserve to experience the same fantasies and excitement we create with everyone else.

if you are at this for years, you are probably gonna have regs who'll eventually open up to or show you their disability. they are looking for acceptance and comfort. we offer so much more than a virtual sexual experience.

but if you find yourself having a real hard time with c2c in general, because you will see shit that might traumatize you, dont accept it across the board. im not talking about disabilities. i had a user show me something so traumatic, i couldnt accept c2c requests for several months.

you can also turn c2c off if you see something you dont like. i personally like to shrink the screen as smallest i can and ignore. but if i turn off c2c i play ignorance and blame c2c being buggy.