When a guy "just wants to know your real name."

[HiGirlsRHot]

I know the timezone and state for a huge number of American models; the territories which many Canadian models live in, the countries European models live in, and amongst those the cities many of them live in or near. For most models, that is almost common knowledge. I would estimate that for popular models, thousands of people may know or be easily able to find what city they live near. It doesn't seem to me like people knowing that information is a huge deal, and that adding a real name on top of that is the "least of your security problems." Considering names are an excellent tool for narrowing down searches, I would say that giving out a first name actually increases risk more than anything else. I also feel that a lot of people vastly underestimate the time and effort a stalker or vengeful person is willing to spend searching for a model.
.

I agree with Evvie I think using your real first name is probably the most risky thing you can do especially if you also use your real birthday.

In the US roughly 5500 girls are born in a day. Most model celebrate their birthday and while I am sure many have cam model birthday (i.e. 3 or 4 a year ) I suspect many also celebrate their real birthday. So we take 5500 girls born on a specific day (public info), filter on first name say an uncommon one like Evvie (I know fake) and now we have ~20 names plus the name of your parents. Even if you lied a couple years about your age. Not to hard to find your location if we have your real name, plenty of internet services will provide it for a nominal fee.

Now I understand why members want a plausible first name, HornyMILF isn't exactly a great name for dirty talk in private.
But I see no reason why any member needs to know your real name, I think that starts flashing stalker.

In contrast,knowing you are 21 year old girl that lives in LA/So Cal narrows the field to one out ~150,000, probably too much work for even the most determined stalker, without a lot more info. But note that having a real birthday and real location isn't particular useful with out a real first name.


I like to know a general location of model cause it is conversation starter.
Oh you from LA "I grew up there"
NYC: "Yankees or Mets Fan"
London "Cool my favorite city"
Florida "how many times you been to Disneyworld?"

Now clearly if you live in small town when I guy could walk the street and with your picture and ask around and there is a good chance somebody would recognize you, but if the location includes several million people, it seems to me it is much less of a problem. But even a super visible model like Aspen Rae tells us she lives in Northern California and it makes her seem more normal when she goes to Giant or Shark games.

 

[Just Me]

Someone told me that if there are 20 people in a room there's a 50/50 chance that two of them will have the same birthday. How can that be?

http://www.howstuffworks.com/question261.htm

 

[Anonymous]

He asked for gas money up front to go a mile and back. :lol:

LMAO...that sounds like something my mom would do. :lol:

 

[AmyDay]

I was a stripper in a former life so being in the same town as my "clients" and working in the same room as other girls conditioned us well for using fake real names. Every now and then I'll talk to one of those girls and they still call me by my fake name, but it's close enough to my real name that people just think that it's an inside joke type of nickname. When I decided to start camming, I made a whole fake identity, which used the same first name as my previous fake name.

Now, my twitter, email address, amazon, facebook, etc, etc, all use my fake name. Both my real first name and fake first name are fairly common, so I paired it with a common last name to make it easy to be buried in the masses so the stalkers get lost quickly. My fake name yields 547,000 results on google... my real name yields 504 results, 8 of the first 9 are me.

 

[Brad]

This reminded me of a friend I had many years ago. (1988ish) It was actually a couple that lived across the street from my shop whose names were Randy and Loretta. I would give both of them a ride on many occasions as they had a very unreliable car. Loretta worked as a lingerie model and I went to pick her up at work one time. When I entered the store a bunch of models approached me which I later found out was just part of their job. When I told them I was there to pick up a friend named Loretta they all looked at me oddly then looked at their boss. She was an older lady who owned the store and she replied to them "he is here for Rachael." That was my first personal experience with use of a stage name and on the way back home I told Loretta that from now on when I come to pick her up I will be known as Rod. It became our inside joke from then on.
:lol:

 

[gofucyourself]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

 

[JerryBoBerry]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

I think stalkers have more to do with being fucking nuts.
Oh, and HUH? What utter bullshit dude. This ain't reciprocity village.

 

[MemberEd]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

Models do not give a rats ass what your real name is or any thing else about you. You can tell them your real info or make it up, they do not care. Models are nice and will converse with you with the hope that you will give her tokens. Models Cam to get tokens, its a job. They are not gathering info so they can stalk members.
Models do not create stalkers. Crazy creates stalkers.

 

[Nordling]

Ha! Neat new way to blame the victims.

"I asked Robert De Niro over for dinner and he won't reciprocate! I'm gonna stalk him!"

 

[yossarian]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

Lighten up, Francis.

 

[EdgarAllenWhoa]

"Stalkers created by models"...really...

WOW...

not even going to...nope...just going to let that one hang out there in the breeze for everyone to have a sniff...

good luck


"Lighten up Francis"

 

[SexySteph]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

Huh? In my experience, members WANT me to know their name. They feel more special when I call them by name. Especially when they take me private. And I provide reciprocity by giving them my name. It's Stephanie. If my stage name doesn't provide enough "reciprocity" for him and prevent a "vacuum" then, nothing would have. You want my real name? Send me a photo copy of your ID, your Social Security card and and photo of you holding those two same items next to your face. I'm sure that will create reciprocity for ME when you have discovered all the same info on me once you know my real name.

Models don't create stalkers. A stalker is going to be a stalker no matter what. It's just a matter of when.

ETA: Also, your Wikipedia article doesn't prove your point... It just explains what reciprocity is. And reciprocity isn't an obligation to give an equal return on what you've received. It's just a type of interaction that is common. There's nothing in there about a lack of reciprocation leading to forced reciprocation...

 

[Anonymous]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

Someone really likes the word 'vacuum'. LOL.

I think most models will tell you that if a member doesn't want to give out his name/mailing info (for raffle prizes and whatnot), that's fine with us, and we won't pressure him to. I don't really mail stuff out to members anymore, but if I still did and encountered someone not comfortable giving out his info, I'd say it's fine and let him pick an alternate prize. As for your thoughts on how a model needs to be willing to reveal the same info that she asks of the member.....dude, that's insane.

If you're one of those MFC members with a vulgar screen name who's expecting a package in the mail from a model, and you have other people in your home who may see the package before you...hopefully, you were smart enough to give that model a name to address you as on the package. I'm sure your teenage daughter and/or your wife would have questions if they saw a package on the table addressed to 'NutInYourMouth'. :lol:

And a lot of Streamate models do Gold shows where they'll moan the name of the highest tipper. That doesn't mean they (the models) should have to suddenly start revealing their real names to high tippers.

 

[gofucyourself]

Um, yes, models create stalkers. Read the old F4F handbook.

 

[JerryBoBerry]

Um, yes, models create stalkers. Read the old F4F handbook.

Hahaha silly troll. Apply your username.

 

[mynameisbob84]

If you ask for a members name, you place your own info on the table. It is called reciprocity.

If you do not give reciprocity, you put the member in an information vacuum. And vacuums like to be filled. They will try to fill that vacuum. Hence, you just created a 'stalker'.

More than that, you got one up on the member, an imbalance. How does that member know you are gonna be ethical with it? Trust you? How can they trust you if you don't trust them? That member now fully expects you to tailor your answers based on what you know about him, in other words lying and manipulation. Men do not like manipulative women. Now, he wants your name to keep you honest.

If you then troll this person over them wanting that information vacuum filled then you just created someone out to get you back. That is also reciprocity.

If you a member asks you emotionally charged questions and you are ambiguous in your answers, you just created another information vacuum. More 'stalkerish' behavior.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocit ... psychology)

It amazes me how many stalkers are created by models.

Models only "create" stalkers in the sense that they give the stalker someone to stalk. If it wasn't them, it would be someone else.

Models also don't typically ask for member's real names. Why would they?

And of course there's an imbalance in the relationship between model and member. That's unavoidable. Members are ultimately paying for the model's company; the model isn't paying for the member's company. The member gets to see the model naked; the model just sees what the member types. The model is there to get paid; the member is there for recreation. The model/member relationship just doesn't lend itself to whatever it is you seem to think the model/member relationship should be.

And what the fuckery, dood? If a model is asked "emotionally charged" questions and she doesn't automatically bare her soul to some random guy on the internet, she's "created a stalker"? :?

 

[southsamurai]

ya know, im not shy about giving out my real name (first name anyway, last takes a bit longer) but southsamurai is my net identity. hell, my gf occasionally calls me south or samurai since we met while gaming together. yes, even during sex. nothing sexier than "fuck me harder samurai" in my book lol.
so if a model, or member wanted to call me by my real first name im fine with that. im also fine with south, samurai, sam, southsam, and just about any other iteration you could think of. if i want anonymity i swap to one of my less linked identities (this screen name is easy to find, and is linked in several places to my legal one). i keep 4 minimally linked ids running usually. sure a good computer person could track me down, but theyd have to take the time and effort, and who cares?

but! im a big, well armed fella. i would find it fun to pop a cap in some net idiot who wanted to find me in rl. not so much fun for the ladies i would imagine.

 

[PunkInDrublic]

Man I thought the Rusty Shacklefords on page 2 were insane and delusional but this guy makes them look pretty normal.

 

[LadyLuna]

I don't use names very often. In real life, it's usually quite obvious who I'm talking to without needing to use a name. Since I don't use them irl, I rarely use them in private. If he asks me to moan his name, I'll ask him what name he wants me to use. He can have me call him Han Solo for all I care (and one guy actually did ).

 

[Brad]

I don't use names very often. In real life, it's usually quite obvious who I'm talking to without needing to use a name. Since I don't use them irl, I rarely use them in private. If he asks me to moan his name, I'll ask him what name he wants me to use. He can have me call him Han Solo for all I care (and one guy actually did ).

And you are another good example. (your screen name actually) LadyLuna is too much like saying someone's full name to me but if you liked LL or Luna then that would be fine. My apologies if this is just another odd quirk of my brain but I like using short and simple first names or initials if possible. And as mentioned some screen names just do not lend themselves to being used as a greeting. Sorry but I just would not feel comfortable calling a girl by the name FuckmeBB.
:lol:

And to the dude that doesn't know how to spell fuck and had to post the stalkerish comments, you really need to stop and take a deep breath. You have it all wrong in my case and I am an MFC premium who buys and tips tokens. I would think that I may be among the target audience of MFC models so my opinions may be somewhat helpful. Your opinion just come off as whack job city. NEVER blame the victim man. That's not cool and especially in the way you wrote it. Models don't make stalkers, creepy dudes do.
:hand: :naughty:

I use my real name because I am all over the net and I am a mean old dude that nobody would want to stalk. BUT I would NEVER suggest that a model use her real name. Totally different situation and they DO need privacy because they are being watched (via camming) by thousands of guys and the odds are good that possibly one or two of them will be a creep. So I would always advise to pick a stage name.
:thumbleft:

 

[LadyLuna]

I don't use names very often. In real life, it's usually quite obvious who I'm talking to without needing to use a name. Since I don't use them irl, I rarely use them in private. If he asks me to moan his name, I'll ask him what name he wants me to use. He can have me call him Han Solo for all I care (and one guy actually did ).

And you are another good example. (your screen name actually) LadyLuna is too much like saying someone's full name to me but if you liked LL or Luna then that would be fine. My apologies if this is just another odd quirk of my brain but I like using short and simple first names or initials if possible. And as mentioned some screen names just do not lend themselves to being used as a greeting. Sorry but I just would not feel comfortable calling a girl by the name FuckmeBB.
:lol:

It's "LadyLuna" because I had to have 4 letters, which cut out Eve, EveMatteo doesn't seem like a good camming name, so I went with Luna. But Luna was taken, as was LovelyLuna and LunaLove. LadyLuna popped into my head, and I debated it for two days before taking it. (The pro's was "Well, I am kinda lady-like, and it kinda gives a classy feel", con's "but it makes me sound like a domme, and I'm definitely submissive...")

So yeah, I take Luna, Tigger, Superball, Bouncy, Lady, Loon, Lunatic, Eve, Eevee, Lady Moon, Moon-girl... :lol:

 

[yossarian]

I'm kind of surprised at how many of you seem to use fake names in real life. Did not know that was a thing people did unless they were in a spy movie or the witness protection program. :/

 

[EdgarAllenWhoa]

He can have me call him Han Solo for all I care (and one guy actually did ).

Wow...that's some pretty wild stuff there...it must have been a little ...you know...unusual.

Umhhh...ah...how should I...hmm.



Would you moan and call me Chewbacca? :royalty-king:


:character-hobbes:

 

[southsamurai]

I'm kind of surprised at how many of you seem to use fake names in real life. Did not know that was a thing people did unless they were in a spy movie or the witness protection program. :/

nah, though getting an identity that can pass inspection by authorities is a different matter, and very expensive. but if all you want to do is keep your real, legal name private all you need is a fake id and you're good to go as far as nosy neighbors, bartenders and such are concerned. its getting harder and more expensive to keep a good fake identity going. by that i mean with a SS#, credit history, etc...

but plenty of people drop fake names fairly casually. guys and gals both do it at bars and such when flirting or trying to hook up. i tend to at least give a fake first name or last name with nosy random strangers i dont want bugging me later on. ( i even got away with being tyler durden for a while. long story there but it was fun). but then again for some reason people i meet tend to latch on fast, give me their life story and want to exchange phone numbers and such. i just give them a fake name, a spoof email addy and my burner phone number and decide later if i want to actually talk to them again. old habits from my less than legal activities days i guess.

 

[JerryBoBerry]

I'm kind of surprised at how many of you seem to use fake names in real life. Did not know that was a thing people did unless they were in a spy movie or the witness protection program. :/

nah, though getting an identity that can pass inspection by authorities is a different matter, and very expensive. but if all you want to do is keep your real, legal name private all you need is a fake id and you're good to go as far as nosy neighbors, bartenders and such are concerned. its getting harder and more expensive to keep a good fake identity going. by that i mean with a SS#, credit history, etc...

but plenty of people drop fake names fairly casually. guys and gals both do it at bars and such when flirting or trying to hook up. i tend to at least give a fake first name or last name with nosy random strangers i dont want bugging me later on. ( i even got away with being tyler durden for a while. long story there but it was fun). but then again for some reason people i meet tend to latch on fast, give me their life story and want to exchange phone numbers and such. i just give them a fake name, a spoof email addy and my burner phone number and decide later if i want to actually talk to them again. old habits from my less than legal activities days i guess.

Almost exactly. I've never had 'less than legal activities' really. But my first instinct is always to give a fake name when asked. Unless it's for legal reason I just think that's the best way to go in most situations.

 

[Picnic]

I respond with, "My name is PicNic" and change the subject. Anyone who presses further doesn't get my attention!

 

[Always_Tim]

As mentioned some screen names just do not lend themselves to being used as a greeting. Sorry but I just would not feel comfortable calling a girl by the name FuckmeBB.

I tend to avoid models whose usernames don't provide any obvious way to address them in a reasonable manner. If I can't figure out how to talk to them, then I don't feel comfortable in their rooms.

There are some models who have other nicknames besides their usernames (e.g., "Lacey" for Miss_Lollipop) but they need to have a reasonable username before I'll go into the room (or read the profile) to find that out. (Miss_Lollipop is a reasonable username; I'm perfectly comfortable calling her "Lolli")

I use my real name because I am all over the net and I am a mean old dude that nobody would want to stalk. BUT I would NEVER suggest that a model use her real name. Totally different situation and they DO need privacy because they are being watched (via camming) by thousands of guys and the odds are good that possibly one or two of them will be a creep. So I would always advise to pick a stage name.

Yes. This. Exactly.

"Tim" is my real name. I used to use a username on MFC (and here) that's the same as I use on non-sex sites (and in email addresses that family use, etc.) But (a) I'm not a model and (b) I'm a guy. In addition to models obviously needing to hide their real names, I'd extend that to female members as well. A lot of these discussions tend to assume that all members are guys, but of course there are a number of female members on MFC and they're subject to a lot of the same harassment and other problems that models have to deal with. On a smaller scale usually, but it happens.

 

[Always_Tim]

Oh, and to the loser who feels entitled to knowing models' names just because he gives out his? You don't speak for the rest of us. I hope we've all made that clear by now. So shut up and stop trying to generalize your own problem to the rest of us.

If a model happens to give me her name/location/whatever it's because I've earned her trust and she made that decision (and it's probably a very difficult decision, as it could be potentially very dangerous). Not because I deserve it for sharing my info, or tipping a bunch, or anything other stupid made-up reason. In the tiny number of cases where it happens it's always a surprise and a delight, not something I've been expecting or waiting for or even particularly seeking.

It's not just a question of models' safety either. The reality is that knowing too much about about a model makes many interactions on MFC awkward and generally leads to a narrowing of scope. (In particular a model may no longer feel comfortable being in sexual situations involving you. Edit: Oh and you may not feel comfortable either, even if she does.) These things impact both the model and the member, sometimes in unpredictable ways. Sometimes it can put stress on friendships and cause problems in your life outside MFC, too.

In any case, crazy expectations like yours will just leave you disappointed, frustrated, and sad.

 

[AmyDay]

Oh, and to the loser who feels entitled to knowing models' names just because he gives out his? You don't speak for the rest of us. I hope we've all made that clear by now. So shut up and stop trying to generalize your own problem to the rest of us.

If a model happens to give me her name/location/whatever it's because I've earned her trust and she made that decision (and it's probably a very difficult decision, as it could be potentially very dangerous). Not because I deserve it for sharing my info, or tipping a bunch, or anything other stupid made-up reason. In the tiny number of cases where it happens it's always a surprise and a delight, not something I've been expecting or waiting for or even particularly seeking.

It's not just a question of models' safety either. The reality is that knowing too much about about a model makes many interactions on MFC awkward and generally leads to a narrowing of scope. (In particular a model may no longer feel comfortable being in sexual situations involving you. Edit: Oh and you may not feel comfortable either, even if she does.) These things impact both the model and the member, sometimes in unpredictable ways. Sometimes it can put stress on friendships and cause problems in your life outside MFC, too.

In any case, crazy expectations like yours will just leave you disappointed, frustrated, and sad.

Thank you for being you, Awesomesauce!

 

[EmelieSky]

My first real name sounds stupid in English, so I go by one of my second names with English speaking people IRL.

Everything around my camsona have the "Emelie glow" around it. I don't anyone to break that so if someone insist on knowing my name, and won't accept my answer, I ban.