Is it socially acceptable to say "rape" casually?

[Anonymous]

Rape to me is closer to words like Nazi, Hitler, and Nigger than an expression like "that's so gay" or I'll kill you.

^This little boy is so cute...haha.^

If I'm really upset at what somebody did to me rather than saying "that bastard raped me". I'll say that bastard butt-fucked me with a broomstick.

Yeah, 'butt fucked' sounds better (and funnier!)...same thing with the phrase 'fucked up the ass'. I don't really take offense to the usage of the word 'rape', unless it's some weirdo in chat saying "Damn, you make a brotha wanna come out there and rape you." That's because he's actually joking (or not joking?) about raping a human being. He's not just saying "Damn, I'm sick of the way the government is always raping my wallet!" (that phrase, by the way, would not offend me). And not only is it creepy to tell a model that her sexiness makes you wanna rape her...it's just stupid and lame as hell...why would a person even say that out loud anyway? Yeah, dumbass, you're REALLY gonna get laid by flirtatiously telling a woman "You make me wanna rape you, guhl." IDIOT.....

So phrases like 'raping my wallet', etc. are harmless to me, but if you really wanna get a chuckle out of me, use the phrase 'fucked up the ass' or 'butt fucked'. It just sounds really funny!

One of my favorites is when Warden Norton on The Shawshank Redemption said to Andy "No more protection from the guards. I'll pull you out of that one-bunk Hilton and cast you down with the Sodomites. You'll think you've been fucked by a train!" :lol: I gotta start using that phrase...lol.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

Because the amounts of times I've said no to a man/been too drunk/too tired to stop them, and the amounts of times I've had to use physical force to get even the most normal, unsuspecting guy off me because they're horny, maybe a little drunk and want to fuck whatever I say.

:shock:
I don't know who you've been hanging around with but I assure you, they are not "normal, unsuspecting guys". What you described are not the actions of a regular person. Those are the actions of a complete prick, the actions of someone for whom a future as a rapist seems a genuine (and unfortunate) possibility. If this has happened to you with enough regularity for you to consider it the norm, then I urge to make new male friends/acquaintances and never speak to the sociopaths who have tried to force themselves upon you again.
Being drunk and/or horny is not an excuse to continue trying to fuck a girl after she's made it clear she doesn't want sex, ya know? To think that that behaviour is somehow "normal" is kinda dangerous and not remotely something anyone should think.

You would be amazed. It's not really rape, it's more like nagging, a lot of guys will nag. A fairly recent one was I was sharing a bed with my friends brother, we'd been getting together and that was the only bed so we shared, I was clear beforehand nothing would happen. Anyway we were half asleep and he started being a little bit more into it, so tried it on, I was like, "mmmmm no..." He's a good looking guy, but I just didn't want to, he kind of carried on touching me a bit, obviously trying to turn me on, and said something like "mmm you know you want it" I woke up a bit to say "no, fuck off" very firmly and he went ok, and stopped, and was very embarrassed in the morning, we haven't spoken since. These kinds of guys are just letting themselves be controlled by their dicks, it's waving a red flag in front of a bull for them. I don't think it's right, but it's extremely common, they've got a sexy girl they fancy in bed with them, they're a little drunk, very horny, they've been kissing the girl all night, instinct takes over, generally if you say no very clearly they will back off.
In the case with my friend in my bathroom a few months ago it's very different, the guy knowingly raped her, and has done it before, which I also didn't find out until after the second time, in fact apparently after him following her to the bathroom he apologised for it, before doing it again. But because of the amounts of times that a man gets confused about signals/ignores signals, (I mean being in bed with a sexy guy turns me on as much as it does him, but I just don't always want to have sex, so the signals I'd give out could be misleading) it means that when there really is a rape like with my friend, people aren't sure what to believe. It's more like "please?" "no." "please?" "no" "please?" "no" for a few hours then eventually "please?" "oh for fucks sake ok then", I don't count it as rape because I made the decision to go with it, but I do think it's borderline and fucking annoying. How on earth are women meant to play hard to get when we have you men nagging all the time?!
I had one guy who I think is definitely borderline, I've heard he's been like that with other girls, but he was pushy like that, not forceful, just pushy and irritating, I never slept with him, but I remember when I was like "look, it's not going to happen" he was like "oh, I really respect you for that, I see you're not that kind of girl".
Anyway, it's more common than people would think, I am not the only one it happens to, it's just most girls don't get themselves into the same situations as I used to, in fact a lot of men don't consider it rape if the girl hasn't been jumped/had the man physically force himself on her. Like many men don't see anything wrong with grabbing a random girls arse in a pub/club, in fact you can get arrested and sued for it. The bouncers in my town think it's funny because in a local bar a guy I vaguely know kept dancing weirdly around me trying to slap my arse as I was chatting to a few friends, eventually he full on grabbed it and I turned around and knocked him to the ground, I haven't spoken to the guy since, but I'm pretty certain he doesn't think he did anything wrong. I think I'd rather a guy do the nagging/sex thing than grab my arse in public, actually I'd rather them grab my breasts, grabbing a girl from behind just seems so pathetic, like stabbing someone in the back, they're doing it to degrade them but also because they probably won't know who did it. At least if they grabbed a boob I could see their face/be like, um, what the hell? It's not as sneaky.

 

[DivSavel]

As with any word, I personally focus more on the context rather than the word itself. If someone comes in my room and talks about raping me (or another model/member) I immediately tell them that it's unacceptable and I will not tolerate it from my members. It's NOT ok to just go out there and say "I wanna rape you" as a replacement for "I wanna bang you".

I strongly agree with the late, great George Carlin when he asserted that you need to listen to the person and the context in question rather than ban a word from your vocabulary because it's a "bad word". There are no "bad words".

Sometimes a joke that might offend someone else comes into my room and I laugh and don't reprimand the guy/girl. That's just me, I have a high tolerance for humor as I believe everything and anything has a place in humor. To me it can be a wonderful way to deal with pain, the state of the world, or just to make sure that we keep people from trying to control our language. I might say "Phantom of Manhattan makes me wanna hate-fuck Frederick Forsyth" but I won't say "OMG that model is so hot I want to rape her".

Also, on rape fantasies, I don't think that's wrong either. It's a fantasy for a reason. A woman who tells her partner "pretend you're taking me against my will" is NOT an advocate of rape. She might just like the idea of the man she loves and finds attractive losing control and "taking her" because of how badly he wants her. I assume most women talk boundaries and safe-words with their man before engaging in this which completely obliterates any similarity between this and actual rape. Actual rape is never excusable. "S/he was asking for it by the way s/he dressed/acted/what-have-you" coming from someone's mouth proves they're a fucking caveman/woman unable to control his or her own stupid urges.

George Carlin:
"You know that. Lots of people. Lots of groups in this country want to tell you how to talk.
Tell you what you can't talk about. Well, sometimes they'll say, well you can talk about something but you can't joke about it.....
Like rape. They'll say, "you can't joke about rape. Rape's not funny."
I say, "fuck you, I think it's hilarious. How do you like that?"
I can prove to you that rape is funny. Picture Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd.
See, hey why do you think they call him "Porky," eh?"

 

[DivSavel]

As for the double standards on if a girl told you she was going to rape you, not really a double standard, men work differently to women, and they are very different, for one, a woman pretty much cannot rape a man, we could pressure a man into sex, maybe abuse him, but rape? hmmm no.
Also unless this girl is several inches taller than you and considerably stronger than you her saying she's going to rape you when you get home is hardly threatening. If a man who chances are will be a fair amount taller and stronger than you, and has a penis meaning he can rape you says he's going to rape you when you get home it implies he's going to use all his force meaning it'll hurt/not be pleasant. If a girl uses all her force, well, I'm strong for a girl, but let's face it, in bed it's like putting a kitten against an adult cat, me pinning a guy down is hardly threatening.

I actually beg to differ. Women CAN rape men. It has happened before. Often yes it will take a woman stronger than you, but in todays culture more women are capable of defending themselves and therefore more capable of assaulting someone. Also, a woman with a bludgeoning weapon, a gun, or chloroform could easily take out the necessity for physical strength.

A man can get hard without his own consent, ask any guy about accidental boners in school. By random chance or stimulation by the woman a man CAN get hard. Being hard doesn't mean he's consenting to sex. Just like a woman being wet doesn't mean she's consenting. Or, if a girl has a particularly hard time getting him erect (and excuse the detail) she can force feed him viagra and cut off the circulation to his genitals by using a rubber band or cock ring to keep the blood in. Then there's also the case of anally or orally raping a man.

Women CAN control and rape men. I don't believe it's as common but it is very under reported. It wasn't until very recently that the legal definition of rape was changed to include men. Before, the definition was “the carnal knowledge of a female, forcibly and against her will." That doesn't include woman who are anally raped or men (or boys) who are raped at all. Even today men don't report it because many are ridiculed. Cops have actually laughed it off before "Oh, you were raped by a woman? Bet that was a wild night hahaha" meanwhile the victim is sitting in misery and embarrassment at his failed attempts to report an ACTUAL assault.

Proof of women raping men:
http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/15/world/afr ... ?hpt=hp_t2
http://dailypost.com.ng/2012/07/18/six- ... nue-state/
http://www.pattayadailynews.com/en/2011 ... yer-cords/

 

[NataliaGrey]

Eh, it does make me uncomfortable. I've never personally been raped, but I know quite a few girls who have been, both violently and not. They don't go publicizing it, and so very few people actually know about it. That's the way most people are, they're not open about it, so when someone uses that word, jokingly or not, you can't really know if you're being insensitive. Most of them won't show any sign of it once the word is used, either, but it can be unsettling. Granted, this is what I've taken from other people who have been through it, but I just don't see the point in using the word if it could pretty easily make someone relive a bad experience. I also understand the flip side, the people who say that anything can be offensive so it's best just to make everything fair game, and I do hate censorship. Still, personally, I'm not going to use that word and I appreciate when others don't either.

 

[LadyLuna]

A woman is perfectly capable of raping a man.

Imagine a man and woman have been teasing each other. The man wants to take it further. The woman, though aroused, says "no". If the man pursists and takes her without her consent, it's rape, even though she was aroused.

Reverse it. Man and woman are teasing each other. Woman is the one who pushes it. Man is aroused, but doesn't want to go all the way. He is erect, but saying no. Woman can rape him. Further, here are things a woman can do that will make a man's penis erect whether he wants it to be or not. Certain ways of touching him will make the blood rush in.

Erection != consent

(in programming, != means "does not equal")

Do NOT ever say that a man cannot be raped by a woman. It is possible. I think it's absolutely terrible that English law doesn't recognize the possibility.

(edit: didn't see Div's post yet, sorry hun)

 

[IsabellaSnow]

A woman is perfectly capable of raping a man.

Imagine a man and woman have been teasing each other. The man wants to take it further. The woman, though aroused, says "no". If the man pursists and takes her without her consent, it's rape, even though she was aroused.

Reverse it. Man and woman are teasing each other. Woman is the one who pushes it. Man is aroused, but doesn't want to go all the way. He is erect, but saying no. Woman can rape him. Further, here are things a woman can do that will make a man's penis erect whether he wants it to be or not. Certain ways of touching him will make the blood rush in.

Erection != consent

(in programming, != means "does not equal")

Do NOT ever say that a man cannot be raped by a woman. It is possible. I think it's absolutely terrible that English law doesn't recognize the possibility.

(edit: didn't see Div's post yet, sorry hun)

I agree with you, I don't understand why it's like that, I was told by someone else recently and looked it up. You'd think the man would go floppy if that happened, I mean there are loads of guys who find it difficult getting hard when they're a little nervous and find it a lot harder to cum, I don't know, I don't have a penis, but I agree that this could happen, it's such a fine line though, it could just be because there is almost no way to prove it, like with any rape, but usually if a girl has been raped she can get looked at and they can see the force, if a guy were raped by a girl, unless he had been drugged/beaten the shit out there'd be very little proof of it and the jury wouldn't send the girl down. It's extremely difficult to get a rape conviction as it is even with decent evidence! The jury just don't want to ruin someone's life if there's any chance they're innocent, it's not like a normal conviction, if you go to prison for rape you'll be fucked up in there, you'll possibly never be able to get a job afterwards, having a family etc/getting a girlfriend will be a lot harder (I mean who wants to date someone who's been convicted of rape?), even if jury's believe the man has done it, if they think it was a moment of passion/a stupid mistake they generally don't want to send them down for it.

 

[HiGirlsRHot]

I agree with you, I don't understand why it's like that, I was told by someone else recently and looked it up. You'd think the man would go floppy if that happened, I mean there are loads of guys who find it difficult getting hard when they're a little nervous and find it a lot harder to cum, I don't know, I don't have a penis, but I agree that this could happen, it's such a fine line though, it could just be because there is almost no way to prove it, like with any rape, but usually if a girl has been raped she can get looked at and they can see the force, if a guy were raped by a girl, unless he had been drugged/beaten the shit out there'd be very little proof of it and the jury wouldn't send the girl down. It's extremely difficult to get a rape conviction as it is even with decent evidence! The jury just don't want to ruin someone's life if there's any chance they're innocent, it's not like a normal conviction, if you go to prison for rape you'll be fucked up in there, you'll possibly never be able to get a job afterwards, having a family etc/getting a girlfriend will be a lot harder (I mean who wants to date someone who's been convicted of rape?), even if jury's believe the man has done it, if they think it was a moment of passion/a stupid mistake they generally don't want to send them down for it.

I think female on male rape is exceedingly rare. I googled the hell out of it and found only instance of a conviction in western court. http://fjordman.blogspot.com/2005/11/female-rapist-loses-appeal.html A 24 year old Norwegian woman raping a 32 year old guy. Interestingly a few days ago a woman was convicted of rape in the UK but her victim was a woman and there were men involved.

The Center for Disease Control did a study and found that 7% of male rape victim were victimized by woman, but that includes things like being sodomized by a broomstick or a strap-on. But the CDC failed to stop the Zombie Apocalypse on Walking Dead so do you really believe them .

A fair number of men are rape victims, but it pretty much were you'd expect in prison being nailed by other guys.
As I guy even when even being pursued woman I've had no interest in, I can say that being rape was the furthest thing from my mind!