People who got their nudes leaked, how did it affect your life?

[Puffin]

There is a recent discussion on Reddit:


I feel it would be worthy to highlight here, hence this post. Seems that after an initial reaction most people aren't having much of an issue. Although maybe people who are having problems wouldn't post about it? What do you say?

 

[AmberCutie]

Seems that after an initial reaction most people aren't having much of an issue.

When this happens to "normies" it probably is easier to brush off. If a person is found to have a history of working in the porn industry, there's a bit more to explain when people find out. Someone getting a link to a cam model's cam site profile or a clip makers store page will get a different reaction than a friend or coworker of a non-adult-worker coming across a nude photo someone took for their ex boyfriend.

Sorta different situations, but interesting replies to the thread, nonetheless.

 

[AwesomeKate]

When I was in high school, a friend of mine had her friend take a photo of her naked without her consent. It wasn't posed or anything. I believe she was in the middle of changing her clothes and her friend just took the picture and sent it to the boy she liked. Maybe she thought she was doing her a favor? Anyway, he went on to send it to several more people and it spread. I received the picture in my Myspace messages and it was the talk of the school for several days/weeks.
Basically from that point on she stopped coming to school, started doing more drugs, copped out on her responsibilities, and eventually dropped out. She was ridiculed by everyone, boys and girls alike. I'm sure I don't even know the full extent to which she was bullied. She was a beautiful, talented, funny, smart girl. I think it really, really altered the direction of her life and overall personality.

I always feel so ashamed of how I reacted. I did not stand by her and I participated in the gossip machine. I wish I could go back so badly and have more understanding of what was actually happening. I think at the time I was jealous of her and her body? Jealous of the attention she was getting from boys? So, I wasn't really upset at seeing her fall. Now I understand that she was being harassed and traumatized and shamed.

The entire event helped shape why I eventually began camming. To take control of who sees me naked and decide for myself that my nude body is nothing to be ashamed of. I never wanted to have naked pictures of me ruin my life and hold that much power. Now, when people from my home town try to shame me, I am able to confidently respond and defend myself in a way that she never could. I think about her a lot and hope she is okay.

 

[Poison_Ivy21]

Boy do I have a story about this!

So, I was 19 at the time and was about to get into camming. In order to make sure I could handle the feedback on my body, I submitted a few nudes to this twitter account to post. Went well and I started camming a couple of months later.

But little did I know, some fucking freak bitch I went to high school with found said nudes, printed 2 copies of each picture fucking 8x11, then mailed a copy to each one of my PARENTS HOUSES.

It had to be someone from HS because no one else would 1). Give a fuck 2). Have both my rents home addresses.

I really think it was this girl I graduated with who spent sooo much time slut shaming me and another girl because we lost our stupid virginities before any other girls in our class. We found out right before graduation that she had been doing anal since freshmen year because that's, "God's blindspot." Sounds just like some shit she'd pull.

Needless to say, I can't stand Christian prudes who shove their bullshit onto other people. And pretty much everyone I went to HS with can fuck right the hell off.

Little miss detective bitch has yet to find my cam profile, so hopefully she's found an actual hobby that doesn't involve my bullshit. Maybe she finally dug that stick outta her ass!

 

[Emberblaze]

Google Rehtaeh Parsons.

A really, really tragic story about a girl from Eastern Canada that took her life after photos of her were passed around and she was bullied.

I think any story has the potential to go this way. You never know how a person will react to it. You never know what a person has been through before this point. You never know what will happen once the photos are out. Will people use them for years to come for harassment or will the story fade out? Will they wreck someone's career down the road?

 

[RebelleHart]

I have a similar story to @AwesomeKate

Some of the senior girls at my jr high had a sleepover and, in what was rumored to be a truth or dare game, one of the girls (lets call her Cathy) had a Polaroid taken of her flashing the camera. Come Monday, the girl whose camera it was brings the photo to school to give to Cathy. Cathy and her friend laugh about it then toss it in the trash can. A boy had overheard them and went and fished it out of the trash. He then emailed it to everyone. Not only did the entire school see, but so did her parents. Her parents were very, very conservative and somehow blamed Cathy for the whole thing. To punish her they took away all her clothes except her sweats and SHAVED HER HEAD. It was so fucked up. As a result, Cathy became really withdrawn and barely came to school anymore. Not very surprising since the boys were calling her a slut and now thought she was easy. It was honestly one of the most tragic things I'd ever seen.

 

[NotYou]

I am curious if you ladies (and any gents) agree with my thought on this..

Do you think if nude leaks happen[ed] to guys, it's less of an issue? I mean, guys pull pranks, joke around etc on one another all the time and among many stuff like this is "the norm" and will easily get brushed off and heck, the guy would laugh at it. But not only that, everyone else forgets about it easier unlike with a woman - the woman/girl is then labeled all kinds of potential bad things. I have nothing to backup my thought, other than "what guys are like" (being one myself too, it helps).

But what do you all think?

 

[Zoomer]

A nudes leak is nudes leak, regardless of your sex.

Having said that, the perception and reaction of the peer group may be entirely different. Again, nothing to do with sex, everything to do with "social standing".

Age factors I think - right now my colleagues would likely not give a flying fuck if they saw naked pics or video of me - they may joke once or twice but it'd be business as usual. My friends (male only) would likely ridicule me whenever we were together as a group, but individually it'd be less or even a sensible conversation. My female friends would politely never comment, other than to ask if i am okay.

Wind the clock back to school age... and it'd have been vastly vastly different. I wasn't really bullied at school, but 14-16 I think it'd have been horrific. My school friends were never really friends, and from guys and girls it'd have been brutal and never ending. As said, i wasn't bullied, though some friends would take the piss (in groups, not singularly), but the number of friends who'd have not ripped the piss would have been small, and likely only the ones at the very top of the social ladder would have been strong enough to not join in. Some would use it as a platform to boost their own social standings, and probably go further than any others in bullying. Essentially the commonality shared in brutalising the victim would be their platform to acceptance into whatever social group.

However, I'm no psychologist Just saying I know my friends well now, and I have no friends from those days because they didn't exist; they were... people I was near for periods of time. When I went to Uni I realised the difference between friends and people you were misfortunate enough to tolerate.

Likewise, if I saw naked pics/vids of my friends, I'd probably never mention it... but I'm not a 15 year old boy anymore.

Little miss detective bitch has yet to find my cam profile, so hopefully she's found an actual hobby that doesn't involve my bullshit. Maybe she finally dug that stick outta her ass!

It could be that the reaction she was hoping didn't arise, so gave up.

 

[sexyvanessa4u]

Oh wow, some of these stories are really sad! I think almost everyone has taken nude or sexy pics at some point in their lives and possibly sent them to people they regret. I know I have. It really bothers me when people say people were "asking for it" because they were drinking, not dressed conservatively, etc. Now I'm super careful about sending nude or sexy pics to guys I'm dating because I know how vindictive some people can be-even though a lot of my family members are aware of my camming and former exotic dancing, I would hate for photos to end up in the wrong hands.

 

[EmptyKins]

I was drugged at my first ever frat party in college. I was 18, from a very sheltered Christian community in which "sex" was a bad word, and completely terrified of any and every social gathering.

I remember wearing layers even though it was a warm night. I had a button down cardigan on top and zero cleavage despite my lil effort at a push up bra. I only went because this dude basically claimed me as his gf on the 2nd week of freshman year and i was enamored with his "confident" control -_-

I tried to tell him I'd never been to a party of that size, and that I didn't want to appear clingy but I also didnt want to be left alone. He laughingly assured me we were surrounded by his "brothers" and that no one would mess with me.

As soon as we got inside he was swept away by the bro-fest and I was handed a solo cup by another girl. She was loud, friendly, sweet, and we finished our cups at the same time with hooked arms and tipsy promises of friendship.

Then she went for refills, and I clutched at my cardigan for over 10 minutes surrounded by strangers. I didn't have a phone on me for some reason? Anyway, a tall boy comes to my side with a solo cup and says "Mi*** told me to give this to you! She's a little busy haha!" Then he points at her across the room and she is making out with someone.

At this point, the first cup of 80 proof has hit me hard, and I felt like I was on top of the world. The music was vibrating through my body, my cheeks were flushed red, and I wanted to take off my cardigan and dance.

I looked around for my "bf" and asked the solo cup boy if he knew him. He replied, "Oh, P******!? He's had his tongue down some chicks throat since yesterday!" I pretended not to care, but inside I sobered up almost instantly and asked where the door was.

Tall boy led me outside, and asked me not to leave until i finished the drink "Mi***" sent to me. We sat on the back of a car and he told me all about my "bf" and his escapades, I'm guessing in an attempt to win my favor? Really it just made me not want to date ever again. He kept pushing me to finish my cup by challenging me to chug along with him. The last thing I remember is setting my empty cup down and asking where the bathroom was.

I woke up in my dorm room, my sheets were wet with my own piss, there was blood in my panties, and my dorm mate was anxiously telling me how she got home to someone on top of my sleeping body. She screamed and he left. Then she showed me her phone. My sleepy smiley face was plastered on the screen, a pale sweaty version of myself with the caption, "Another KS ho".

I was naked, there was a tampon string sticking out, and my name was in the comments.

Needless to say, I lost it. I lost myself. I lost my innocence for the 100th time. And eventually I dropped out of college in my 3rd year from drug abuse.

Yes, my naked pictures have been "leaked ", more accurately "spread", and I've never been the same since.

Slut shaming is what brought me to the cam world. I'm both grateful for my experience and ashamed. But the gratitude far outweighs the fucking shameful stigma.

 

[Starman]

That's a harrowing story. So sorry.

 

[EmptyKins]

That's a harrowing story. So sorry.

Thank you. I didn't mean to tell it in such detail at first. It just came out for the first time in a long time and I felt compelled to write it all.

The sweet drunk girl friend I mentioned at the party asked me to lunch a few days later. Turns out she was a sorority "sister" to the fraternity who had posted my picture. She held my hand for a few moments and admonished me not to report it as it was, "just part of the college experience!"

Two years later I helped her get home from a jack in the box at 5am after being assaulted by one of the same "brothers". Idk where she is now and I didn't say who I was back then. I hope she fared better than I, and I hope those few years in between incidents were more kind to her socially and emotionally.

 

[dark_mermaid]

I read "nukes" in the topic

 

[AudriTwo]

We found out right before graduation that she had been doing anal since freshmen year because that's, "God's blindspot." Sounds just like some shit she'd pull.

 

[Poison_Ivy21]

@AudriTwo

Jesus Christ

 

[asia_lynn]

When I was in highschool I was sexually assaulted and pictures were taken (it was a long time ago, no need for sympathy)

Anyways this one guy who somehow ended up with the pics and was sending them around got his phone taken away by the police and I guess some kind of ban like he wasn't allowed a new one (maybe this came from his parents- I'm not sure of police could enforce this) but yeah he was in shit because child pornography.

So this dude HATED me (as if it was my fault???) And we went to the same alternative school which was super far away from my house and the teacher of the school had a school supplied van which he used to drive a lot of the students to and from school. So me and this guy both would get a ride from the teacher but the teacher was so concerned about this guy knowjkn where I lived that I had to get driven all over the frickin town and be dropped off last so that he wouldnt find out.

Anyways that story wasn't really about nudes sorry it just reminded me and I wanted to tell it.

I've had my nudes leaked dozens of times and I've never particularly cared, I mean my body is a body and it's a nice body why should I care if people see it? They have bodies too. But my early teenage experience with sexual bullying and shaming definitely influenced how I view these kinds of things and I guess I'm pretty much immune to it. Sometimes shit life experiences make you a better person eh?

 

[LylacDoll]

I came from a very religious and conservative background. Having nudes leaked was often purported to be absolutely life ruining regardless of circumstances or age. One thing that my mother told me was, "If you ever send a guy nudes just assume that he's gonna show all his buddies." And I took that seriously and decided not to care. I just didn't send anything I wouldn't want shared.

There was only one time that it ever got back to me that a guy had shown someone my nudes. It was to a mutual friend of ours and wasn't that big of a deal. It actually came up in conversation with a compliment. I'm sure they were shared more often than that but it never got back to me and it never blew up.

I think the main reason it didn't matter was because I wasn't in school. The only group that would give me hell over it on a consistent basis was family members who occassionally found out about one thing or another. I also think my genuinely nonchalant attitude about it made it a lot less enticing for people to try to ruin my life over them.