Things Members Say That Make You Go "WTF?"

[Magnolia]

I actually send these to my room helper each night so we can laugh later... but I suppose I can share them here for you all, as well! Here are a few gems, lol:

Science__: wassup
Miqote: how are u ?
Science__: I am quite great except it hurts when I pee
Miqote: oh no!
Miqote: uti?
Science__: maybe. maybe. maybe. or it was from when this chick stuck her finger up my peehole

:lol: OMG, Science__ is one of my fav MFC members. He's a professional troll, a good tipper, and actually holds pretty intellectual conversations. This seems right up his style!

 

[SaffronBurke]

what is ur ethnic ancestry?
you have beautiful skin so i was wondering

Ew.

Also, I glow in the motherfucking dark, what ethnicity do you think I am?

 

[ComicOzzie]

Annoying on multiple levels...

VEGASSWEAT: I don't read profiles
VEGASSWEAT: it takes time away from admiring you nomsayin

"nomsayin"? Seriously? :roll:

 

[ComicOzzie]

A PM from a complete stranger...

2:21:59 PM maikemehorny: hi sir, sorry to bored u whit this message. i'm searching janann vids,i'm a big fan of her,but i'm too poor. in case u have and expecially u want give me some vids of group or pvt i would appreciate. of course i will use them discretely. thanks a
12:21:59 PM maikemehorny: nyway regards

Sure buddy, I'll get right on that. :handgestures-salute:

 

[JerryBoBerry]

A PM from a complete stranger...

2:21:59 PM maikemehorny: hi sir, sorry to bored u whit this message. i'm searching janann vids,i'm a big fan of her,but i'm too poor. in case u have and expecially u want give me some vids of group or pvt i would appreciate. of course i will use them discretely. thanks a
12:21:59 PM maikemehorny: nyway regards

Sure buddy, I'll get right on that. :handgestures-salute:

Good one for everyone to preemptively ban/ignore, models and members alike.

 

[Nordling]

I had to laugh at this tweet:

Fadda @1BoMania
Smh @ReyCHarlz look like she showers with the saliva of the Lord himself

 

[JessieWolfe]

Member claims he wont watch my shows because I'm married and it weirds him out.
Said member still hangs out in my room all the time.
And joins girl girl shows.

Wut?
Then whines about how he wants to take me private but it just feels wrong.

:?

 

[ComicOzzie]

Examples in illiteracy, part infinity...

Topic: Dress Off 459 /Flash Tits@79 /Flash Pussy@99 /All videos@888 -4 new vids@444 -each vid old@99 /Snapchat4ever@333
PPBOS: you are so cute. do you ever take your clothes off?

 

[Sansa]

Examples in illiteracy, part infinity...

Topic: Dress Off 459 /Flash Tits@79 /Flash Pussy@99 /All videos@888 -4 new vids@444 -each vid old@99 /Snapchat4ever@333
PPBOS: you are so cute. do you ever take your clothes off?

I've found that most members do not read topics at all. I advertise countdowns and flashes in mine and I get a lot of "are you non-nude?" After pointing out the topic, they actually admit to not reading them.

 

[Nordling]

Examples in illiteracy, part infinity...

Topic: Dress Off 459 /Flash Tits@79 /Flash Pussy@99 /All videos@888 -4 new vids@444 -each vid old@99 /Snapchat4ever@333
PPBOS: you are so cute. do you ever take your clothes off?

I've found that most members do not read topics at all. I advertise countdowns and flashes in mine and I get a lot of "are you non-nude?" After pointing out the topic, they actually admit to not reading them.

What's funny is you're right...and the irony is that a lot of the same ones who don't read the topic also claim to have "rated and admired," which seems to indicate they've read the models' profiles...or maybe not. I love to inform them that rating and admiring in the profile is similar in value to a diaphragm for Renee Richards.

 

[Johndoe91]

beachfox2: My fav POV would be to mount you from behing and ride you around town like a crazed dog while giving shout outs to my boyz, then blow the entire contents of my nutsack and both my testicles all over your pretty face!!!

 

[justjoinedtopost]

A guy pm's me and tells me he thinks letting the tokenless talk is hurting my fave's tips. I tell him that she decides where to draw the lines, and as long as they behave they get left alone. He tells me he hopes to soon be helping in her room, and our conversation actually turns into a rather pleasant hour or so chat. Until I mention that she has b/g vids for sale. I am not giving away secrets here, it is common knowledge.

He does not want to believe this, goes into total denial. I send him a link showing him the model with her boyfriend. He still does not want to believe; "This stuff looks like it is a couple of years old." he says. I tell him that I emailed her boyfriend less than two weeks ago, and they are still together. He is not happy to hear this.

"I like her, but now that I know she has a bf, I don't even want to tip her." he says. Fair enough.

Except he does. He tips and chats. Things are once again friendly, until things slow down and she winds up pm-ing with someone for a while. Again he messages me. "You've got to leave this girl alone," he warns, "she is ignoring the room (i.e. him) because you are chatting with her too much." True, she is not paying much attention, but it is very slow.

I explain to him that she chats with many members throughout the night (true), and that I do not know who she is chatting with (a lie; we were having a vigorous debate about the earning potential of different Ohmibod products. I am firmly opposed to the in-panty model for reasons I won't get into). He apologizes, says he is sorry for accusing me and that he misjudged her; says he realizes now she is just another whore. Lovely. Exactly the kind of thing an adoring fan likes to hear. But I bite my tongue.

Over the next several nights, he pops into her room several times a night, stays for a couple of minutes and then leaves without saying anything. Then he shows up one night, once again determined to become a room helper. He makes a small tip, and then proceeds to lambast the rest of the room for not tipping. He urges, he goads, he badgers. Someone mentions her ass, and he goes nuts...

"Isn't her ass worth 25 tokens?" he asks. "Come on guys 25 tokens and you can see this ass!" On and on, equal parts enthusiasm and obnoxious stupidity...

Then an adoring fan speaks up: "Tip menu says ass is 50 tokens, not 25." This takes some of the wind out of his sails. Hopefully it is replaced with well-deserved embarrassment.

"Well you gotta start somewhere." he replies. I see, he's running a special this week. But at least he calms down a bit.

For the last several nights, he has gone back to popping in for a couple of minutes and then leaving without a word. But something tells me he is not done yet. :lol:

Very entertaining.

 

[AmberCutie]

I just... I don't know why people think this will work.

I included my facial reaction to it for kicks.

 

[ComicOzzie]

From a blue noob who didn't realize that the model can see his token count is 0.

Mobetta4ever: Turn on your mobile feed feed so I can tip..

She proceeded to call him out for the lying liar he is. :lol:

 

[justjoinedtopost]

For the last several nights, he has gone back to popping in for a couple of minutes and then leaving without a word. But something tells me he is not done yet. :lol:

Turns out I am some kind of prophet. He (hereafter referred to as bigdildo) came back. And if there are any models who wish to learn to squirt, pm me for his real username.

Spoiler

Within 10 seconds of entering the room, he tipped 7 tokens. The model answered within about 20 seconds, right about the time the first line below got posted. That did not stop him from posting the others...
bigdildo: see how long it takes her to notice I am here
bigdildo: and tipped
bigdildo: whistles
bigdildo: hello
bigdildo: your busy in PM

That little 7 token tip got her to one of her smaller goals or something, f*ck-all if I know, and she masturbated for several minutes, during which he dropped two more 10 token tips. This kind of talk normally doesn't bother me, but from him it was revolting...
bigdildo: mmmhmm
bigdildo: thats a good girl

She finishes up, and a guy is talking with her in Spanish (she is talking verbally). In spite of the fact she is already talking with the guy...
bigdildo: she speaks english spanishGuy
spanishGuy left right after bigdildo said this, right before MODEL typed in that she would private.


Then she was busy for a few minutes, no idea with who, until a pm...
bigdildo: I think she enjoys not making goal
bigdildo: and being poor
adoringfan: lol
adoringfan: why you say that?
adoringfan: has trouble making goal many night it is true
bigdildo: because I am like hey I will email some videos so you can learn to squirt so you can earn more
bigdildo: and she is like no it is ok no email
bigdildo: I was like ok you have 52 people in the room and 49 are tokenless
bigdildo: she might as well be an exhibitionist
bigdildo: because she isn't making money on this sight
bigdildo: saw a girl make 20k on an ohmibodshow
bigdildo: the other day
bigdildo: she is 45 too
bigdildo: and she did get tortured with the ohmibod
bigdildo: but she got paid
bigdildo: MODEL should have at least 500 peeps in her room
bigdildo: seen girls who don't show have 500
adoringfan: she gets there sometimes
adoringfan: seen her a few nights with that many
bigdildo: I have never seen her with over 300
bigdildo: and seen her make goal just one time
bigdildo: just trying to help her
adoringfan: what do you think she should change?
bigdildo: well talk to the room
bigdildo: try to have a convo
bigdildo: stay out of pms all the time even though we pm her sometimes' (this "we" shit really hit a nerve with me. I go for his jealousy in retaliation. The “like her as a person” remark makes me think it might have worked)
adoringfan: she talk to room a lot earlier
adoringfan: lol
adoringfan: guy had her 2 fingers calling his name
adoringfan: hot shit
bigdildo: i think MODEL is a sweetheart and I like her as a person
bigdildo: but not the best show I have ever seen
bigdildo: I tipped her when I came room took her 3 minutes to answer (right)

And right here is where she banned him. I do not know if he didn't realize she was going to see every word he typed, or if he did and just wanted her to see it.

 

[SaffronBurke]

Sunday night, a guy asked me to do degrading dirty talk, insult him, call him whatever. Well, I'm really, really bad at that unless it's along with something that I enjoy, like findom or high heel worship. I can insult the fuck out of you while you worship my feet or give me all your money. But I can't *just* insult. I made it very clear that I don't do that, have no idea what to even say, etc. You know, the truth.

Dude still takes me private. Sits there trying to talk me into doing something that I already said no to as his dollars trickle away. Hey, if you're going to pay my private rate to argue with me, I'm not going to complain - that's on you, bub.

I finally get through to him, and he asks me to do a cumshow. I get nekkid, do my thing, he tells me to do a couple things that I can't physically do, which I make clear to him.

Then, Monday night, he comes in my chat complaining about how bad and a waste of money the private was.

Duh. Wonder why it sucked. Maybe you should have taken someone private who offers your fetish, instead of the model vehemently proclaiming, "No, I don't do that, I suck at it!" :handgestures-salute:

 

[Ann_Sulu]

Sunday night, a guy asked me to do degrading dirty talk, insult him, call him whatever. Well, I'm really, really bad at that unless it's along with something that I enjoy, like findom or high heel worship. I can insult the fuck out of you while you worship my feet or give me all your money. But I can't *just* insult. I made it very clear that I don't do that, have no idea what to even say, etc. You know, the truth.

Dude still takes me private. Sits there trying to talk me into doing something that I already said no to as his dollars trickle away. Hey, if you're going to pay my private rate to argue with me, I'm not going to complain - that's on you, bub.

I finally get through to him, and he asks me to do a cumshow. I get nekkid, do my thing, he tells me to do a couple things that I can't physically do, which I make clear to him.

Then, Monday night, he comes in my chat complaining about how bad and a waste of money the private was.

Duh. Wonder why it sucked. Maybe you should have taken someone private who offers your fetish, instead of the model vehemently proclaiming, "No, I don't do that, I suck at it!" :handgestures-salute:

Makes me wonder if he just wanted you to have an easier time mocking him the next time you saw him, since you now definitely think of him as an idiot loser. :mrgreen:

 

[SaffronBurke]

Sunday night, a guy asked me to do degrading dirty talk, insult him, call him whatever. Well, I'm really, really bad at that unless it's along with something that I enjoy, like findom or high heel worship. I can insult the fuck out of you while you worship my feet or give me all your money. But I can't *just* insult. I made it very clear that I don't do that, have no idea what to even say, etc. You know, the truth.

Dude still takes me private. Sits there trying to talk me into doing something that I already said no to as his dollars trickle away. Hey, if you're going to pay my private rate to argue with me, I'm not going to complain - that's on you, bub.

I finally get through to him, and he asks me to do a cumshow. I get nekkid, do my thing, he tells me to do a couple things that I can't physically do, which I make clear to him.

Then, Monday night, he comes in my chat complaining about how bad and a waste of money the private was.

Duh. Wonder why it sucked. Maybe you should have taken someone private who offers your fetish, instead of the model vehemently proclaiming, "No, I don't do that, I suck at it!" :handgestures-salute:

Makes me wonder if he just wanted you to have an easier time mocking him the next time you saw him, since you now definitely think of him as an idiot loser. :mrgreen:

Well, he failed at that, because I told him it's his own fault he was unhappy with the show, then banned him. Forget that noise.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

One more I simply have to share, and then I will restrain myself.

Guy is getting a little carried away with his lewdness in public, which leads to this pm exchange. It's possible he was trolling; but if not, looks like MODEL got that big career break she's been waiting for, and I got a new jo bud.

Spoiler

adoringfan: friendly heads up she prefers stuff that “vulgar” as she puts it in a tipnote
boostU_uppaNotch: thanks
boostU_uppaNotch: hey can I ask u a question
adoringfan: sure
boostU_uppaNotch: would you watch MODEL more and continue to be her mod if I cam up with her?
adoringfan: what do you mean
adoringfan: you mean perform bg stuff?
boostU_uppaNotch: like if we were a couple on here would it be more hotter?
boostU_uppaNotch: seeing her fuck a younger guy with a huge cock
adoringfan: you know she has a bf she does stuff with right?
boostU_uppaNotch: oh really?...i didn't know that
adoringfan: yeah
boostU_uppaNotch: well anyway I feel like I could boost her page up a notch
adoringfan: yeah she banned a guy just othr day came in here thinking that idiotic crap
adoringfan: these girls dont need ur help
boostU_uppaNotch: it'll be more interesting seeing her in full control with a boy toy that has a huge cock
boostU_uppaNotch: you cant hate and say it won't be a good idea man
adoringfan: hate?
adoringfan: lol
adoringfan: no hate
adoringfan: lol
boostU_uppaNotch: no just saying
boostU_uppaNotch: thats why is only us 2 talking
boostU_uppaNotch: it obviously not going to happen
adoringfan: oh so you just in mood to dirty talk with me?
adoringfan: get lost.
adoringfan: not interested
boostU_uppaNotch: wait what?
boostU_uppaNotch: you tripping
boostU_uppaNotch: lmao
adoringfan: yeah sure
adoringfan: im one tripping

 

[ComicOzzie]

Another lying blue noob gets busted because he doesnt realize that the model can see that he currently has tokens...

oketz1979: i gave all my tokens anyone comeone
oketz1979: i want to see the show

:naughty:

 

[ComicOzzie]

I'm glad he explained this, because how would we ever know otherwise??

runna40: hi my name is runna
runna40: most people call me runna
runna40: but you can call me runna
runna40: if you want

:thumbleft:

 

[ComicOzzie]

I am pretty sure that this is anatomically impossible...

W0rkNStiffy: How much to lick that asshole?

:?

 

[Johndoe91]

I am pretty sure that this is anatomically impossible...

W0rkNStiffy: How much to lick that asshole?

:?

 

[amberadamsmfc]

him: can you burp on command?
me: no but i can try... *attempt to swallow air, fail*
him: *tips me 30 tokens* burp
me: thank you! i tried but i really can't do it on command, i'm sorry
him: *tips me 30 more* fart
him: *tips me another 30* fart and burp at the same time

easiest and strangest 90 tokens i ever made... too bad i can't figure out how to do it on command or he could have become a new regular for me HAHAHA!

 

[Nordling]

These really were all in a row--a trifecta of dumb questions/statements.

 

[SaffronBurke]

What are you, 12?

 

[yossarian]

[NOOB]: Boy girl
[Model]: *ignores him*
[NOOB]: b/g
[Model]: *ignores him more*
[NOOB]: No b/g
[Model]: Are you asking if I have any boy-girl videos? I don't have boy-girl videos, but I have some girl-girl videos on my profile.
[NOOB] (disappointed): Oh. So ur a lezzie huh.
[Model]: *rolls eyes*
[NOOB]: It's OK I like lezzies I watch them all the time.

 

[Xeibriz]

What are you, 12?

Maybe he's just an annoyed old, fat guy.

 

[SaffronBurke]

What are you, 12?

Maybe he's just an annoyed old, fat guy.

"Moooom, get out of the basement, I'm talking to GIRLS"

 

[Ann_Sulu]

Now I like Nirvana and all, but going into a model's chat , when she's neither talking about, or playing anything which has to do with Kurt Cobain made me very confused haha. I kind of felt bad, because I sorta made fun of him for this. I feel bad in the sense that say I might be reminded of a celebrity and think man...I miss that guy. This guy had never been in my chat before, and probably won't be back since I wouldn't show as in free chat. I can only assume he thought he could get free ass for his loss...that happened in the 90's. I don't feel bad over that last bit by the way. :lol: