Things Members Say That Make You Go "WTF?"

[ComicOzzie]

In my MFC mail today (with the subject line 'hi sweetheart,' so I knew it wasn't going to be very useful)

"Wow, you are very beautiful and sound amazing in your profile. I'm so jealous of your bf, he's such a lucky guy. Wish I was him. I would love to talk to you and get to know you better. It's not everyday I find an angel. Maybe I might even have to sweep you off your feet and steal your heart hehe. Have a great day. Hope to hear from you soon sweetheart"

Hmm.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess this guy has never tipped you.

 

[SexyStacia]

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess this guy has never tipped you.

The second a guy starts sweet talking like this you can be sure he is never gonna spend a dime. Compliments don't pay my bills.

 

[ThatSmexualEditor]

"Nice chin…" - me when the cam is aimed at the model's chest.

Sorry about causing a few WTF moments for some ladies :')

 

[Poison_Ivy21]

This popped into my inbox this morning, never seen this guy before.

Well alrighty then.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

@Poison_Ivy21 srsly wth!? XD

That just looks like a bunch of keywords.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

A profile comment...

"Hi....you are very sexxy. I just rated and admired you. When I first entered your room my penis became rock hard for you immediately. You looked soo...sexxy in that short little black dress with those sheer pantyhose and high-heels. The urge to masturbate for you totally overwhelmed me. I began slowly stroking my penis for you and pre-cum started to flow out of it. It didn't take very long before I could feel my balls tightening up and my sperm raising and boiling up through the shaft of my erection. I could actually feel my massive penis throbbing and pulsating in my hand as my penis spewed forth many large and heavy spurts of my thick, hot, white, sperm, for you in tribute to your beauty. After ejaculating for you, my penis remained very erect and I continued jacking off for you. A short time latter, I could feel more hot sperm raising up through my shaft and again, my penis began throbbing in my hand as I began ejaculating another enormous load of hot cum for you. Once again my cock remained very hard and I continued jacking off while looking at your beautiful nylon covered legs and high-heels. By now, I was jacking off out of control for you. I was masturbating like a fifteen year old kid in a porno theater for his first time. I asked you to open my cam and and watch me spew my sperm for you...and you did...you watched my third load of sperm shoot out of control, from my throbbing erection, for your viewing pleasure. There are very few ladies that can make me masturbate, and cum, like you just did. I'm looking forward to many more multiple ejaculations, c2c, with you very soon."

 

[Horntoad40]

Cookie is a fairly common term for pussy...so is beaver, coochie, cooter, cuca, clam, flange, hoo-ha, minge, penocha, putang, snapper, taco, va-jay-jay and those are just the more common ones.

ETA: MOAR

Bait
Bald Biscuit
Banana Box
Bean
Bear Trap
Bearded Ax Wound
Bearded Clam
Bearded Taco
Beaver
Beaver Teeth
Beef Tomato
Beetle Hood
Belly Entrance
Bikini Bizkit
Bird's Nest
Birth Canal
Bitch Ditch
Black Hole
Black Hole Of Calcutta
Black Oak
Bluntfrunt
Bologna Flap-over
Bone Hider
Bone Polisher
Bonefish
Bottom less Pit
Bowl
Box
Boy In The Canoe
Brakepads
Brazilia n Caterpillar
Bread-box
Br eakfast Of Champions
Bucket
Buffalo Gums
Bunny Tuft
Burger Bar
Bush
Bush Tucker
Calamari Cockring
Camarillo Brillo
Candy Kiss
Carpet
Cat
Catch er's Mitt
Cats Paw
Cherry
Cherry Pop Tart
Chia Hole
Chicken's Tongue
Chin-chin
Clam Canal
Clamarama
Clap Trap
Clit Slit
Cock Cave
Cock Curator
Cock Holster
Cock Magnet
Cock Pocket
Cock Sock
Cock Socket
Cock Squeezer
Cock Warmer
Cock-chafer
Cockp it
Cold Cut Combo
Conch Shell
Cooch
Coochie Pop
Cookie
Coose Canal
Cooter Muffin
Cooze
Count Fapula
Courtney Cocksleve
Crack
Crack Of Heaven
Crave Cave
Cream Canal
Crotch Waffle
Cucumber Canal
Cum Crack
Cum Craver
Cunny
Cunt
Cun try Pie
Cuntzilla
Cupid's Cupboard
Curly Curtains
Davey Jones Locker
Dead Clam
Deep Pink
Deep Socket
Deer Hoof
Depository
Devil's Hole
Dick Basket
Dick Deposit
Dick Driver
Dick Dungeon
Dick Eater
Dick Mitten
Dick Rack
Dildo Hotel
Dinner Roll
Dna Dumpster
Dog's Mouth
Door Of Life
Dove Breast
Egg Drop Box
Enchilada Of Love
Erie Canal
Fatty
Fetus Flaps
Field Of Dreams
Fish Canyon
Fish Dish
Fish Mitten
Fish Sandwich
Fishamjig
Flapp ed Bap
Flaps
Flesh Cavern
Flesh Tuxedo
Flower
Fly Catcher
Fortune Nookie (china)
Foxhole
Front Bottom
Fruit Cup
Frum
Fuck Donut
Fuck Pocket
Fuckhole
Fun Hatch
Fur Burger
Furby
Furrogi (poland)
Furry 8 Ball Rack
Furry Furnace
Fury Pink Mink
Fuzz Box
Fuzz Bucket
Fuzzy Wuzzy
Gash
Gauntlet
G izmo
Glory Hole
Golden Arches
Golden Palace
Golden Valley
Goodie Basket
Grandest Canyon
Grassy Knoll
Ground Zero
Grumble
Hair Pie
Hairy Doughnut
Hairy Heaven
Hairy Potter
Ham Sandwich
Hamper Of Goodies
Happy Flappy
Happy Valley
Hatchet Wound
Head Catcher
Her Asshole Neighbor
Holiest Of Holies
Holy Grail
Home Plate
Homebase
Honey Pot
Horn Of Plenty
Hot Pocket
Hot Spot
Hot Tamaki Walk
Hump Hole
Hungry Minge
Indian Bones and the Temple of Poon
Jaws Of Life
Jelly Roll
Jewel Box
Jezebel's Smell
Jizz Recepticle
Juice Box
Kitty Cage
Kitty Kat
Knish
Lap Flounder
Launch Pad
Lawrence Of A Labia
Lick N' Stick
Lip Jeans
Lip Tip
Little Debbie
Lobster Pot
Lotus
Love Canal
Love Cave
Love Glove
Love Hole
Love Rug
Lovebox
Lucy
Mamm al Hole
Man In The Boat
Man's Charity Bash
Mans Ruin
Marcia (australia)
Meat Counter
Meat Crease
Meat Curtains
Meat Massager
Meat Tunnel
Meat Wagon
Melvin
Midnight Dip
Mingus
Mommy Parts
Mommy's Pie
Moneymaker
Mossy Jaw
Mound
Mound Of Venus
Mud Flaps
Muff
Mule Nose
Mumble Pants (sweden)
Mumbler (australia)
Mystical Fold
Nana
Nappy Dugout
Nappy Roots
Nether Lips
Nice Slice
Ninja Boot
Noochie
Nookie
O ld Catchers Mitt
One Eyed Worm Hole
One-eyed Python Trail
Pachinko
Packin Shack
Pancake Fold
Pandora's Box
Panty Hamster
Pastrami Flaps
Peach
Pearl Hotel
Pee Jaws
Peeshie
Penalty Box
Penis Parking
Penis Pothole
Penis Purse
Penis Warmer
Peter Vise
Peters Grove
Pickle Stinker
Pink
Pink Circle
Pink Cookie
Pink Heaven
Pink Panther
Pink Portal
Pink Taco
Pink Truffle
Pink Turtleneck
Pish Buffet
Piss Fenders
Piss Flaps
Pissy Froth Hole
Pizzo
Pocket Pie
Pole Hole
Pole Magnet
Ponchita
Poochika
Poody Tat
Poon Jab
Poonaner
Poontang
Poontang Pie
Pooswaa
Pork Pie
Pound Cake
Private Area
Pud Pocket
Pudding
Punani
Punash
Purple People Penis Eater
Pussy
Python Syphon
Queef Quarters
Quim
Rack Of Clam
Rattlesnake Canyon
Red Lane
Red River Gorge
Red Sea
Republic Of Labia
Richards House
Roast Beef Curtains
Rooster Jaws
Rosebud
Round Mound Of Beehound
Salami Garage
Saloon Doors
Sausage Wallet
Scrambled Eggs Between the Legs
Scrumpter
Scunt
Sea Food Six Pack
Serpent Socket
Silk Funnel
Silk Igloo
Skin Canoe
Skins
Slice Of Heaven
Slippery Slide
Slop Hole
Slot Pocket
Slurpee Machine
Slurpy
Snail Tracker
Snake Charmer
Snake Lake
Snatch
Snooch
So uth Mouth
Spasm Chasm
Sperm Bank
Sperm Shack
Sperm Sucker
Spitball Bullseye
Split Dick
Spunk-pot
Squeeze-b ox
Squid
Stench Trench
Stink Rink
Stinkhole
Stinky Speedway
Stop-n-pop
Suga r Basin
Sugar Hole
Sweat Box
Sweet Briar
Tackle Box
Tampon Tunnel
Temperamental Ringpiece
Temporary Lodgings
The Big Casino
The Big W
The Blow Hole
The Bone Collector
The Condo Downstate
The Cum Dump
The Dea Bone Patch
The Death Of Adam
The Deflower Patch
The Easy Bake Oven
The Fish Flap
The Furry Cup
The Great Divide
The Helmet Hide-a-way
The Indoor Barbecue
The Indoor Picnic
The Notorious V.a.g.
The One-door Vulva
The Promised Land
The Pump Protector
The Schlong Sucker
The Shrine
The Toothless Blowjob
The Twatlantic Ocean
The Unmentionable
The Vegan Store
The Vegetarian's Temptation
The Virginator
The Welcome Opponent
The Wombsday Book
Theme Park
Thresher
Tickled Pink
Tinker Bell
Tomahawk Chop
Tongue Depressor
Tongue Roll
Toolshed
Trim
Tu na Pot Pie
Tuna Spread
Tuna Taco
Tuna Town
Tunnel Of Love
Twat
Vacuum Vulva
Vadge
VAG (didn't forget it Muted you dodo)
Vagina
Vedgie
V elcro Love Triangle
Venus Butterfly
Vertical Smile
Vidgie
Wagon Ruts
Wand Waxer
Weiner Wrap
Welly Top
Wet Mark
Wet Seal
Where Uncle's Doodle goes
Whisker Biscuit
Willys Haven
Wilt Chamberlian's daily glove
Wizard's Sleeve
Wolly Bolly
Womens Weapon
Wonder Bread
Wookie
Yeast Pocket
Yo Yo Smuggler
Yoni

you forgot grunion

 

[MochaMona]

You look like my sister..... Which I doubt ...I really hope I dont..for her sake lol

 

[SaffronBurke]

You look like my sister..... Which I doubt ...I really hope I dont..for her sake lol

I had a guy tell me that I look like his aunt... Well, if you're young enough to be my nephew, you're WAY too young to be on a porn site, bye! Then he came back a couple hours later and said I look like his cousin. Mmhmm, sure.

 

[Poison_Ivy21]

Guy in my chat said, "I'm 14 I stole my dads credit card." Most likely just a grown man trolling, but obviously got blocked immediately. His screen name at the time was Jake, but I just looked and he has changed it to Michael. Some people are so fucking lame.

 

[SaffronBurke]

Guy in my chat said, "I'm 14 I stole my dads credit card." Most likely just a grown man trolling, but obviously got blocked immediately. His screen name at the time was Jake, but I just looked and he has changed it to Michael. Some people are so fucking lame.

Do they really think nobody's going to report them for that? Dumbass.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

But @SaffronBurke and @Poison_Ivy21 ...he changed his NAME! Streamate will NEVER figure that out! It's not like the model can clear as day see it when a blocked person changes their name either.

 

[Anatevka]

mcshaghard: Cute. Weight?
Divahkiin: Forward of you.
mcshaghard: I'm blunt. Tight fucking body. Answer.
Divahkiin: Permabanned.

If he wasn't so heinous I would have talked to him a bit longer. I was damn curious how many things he could say while typing exclusively in 1-3 word sentences!

He probably heard of this guy named Christian Grey...

 

[SaffronBurke]

But @SaffronBurke and @Poison_Ivy21 ...he changed his NAME! Streamate will NEVER figure that out! It's not like the model can clear as day see it when a blocked person changes their name either.

There's also that fun thing where we can write notes to ourselves about them. So when the dude named bendUover didn't get the desired reaction from his "I wanna bend you over and brutally fuck your ass" and came back with the username rinseme, I just raised my eyebrow every time he was in my room because the drastic change amused me so much.

 

[CherryChu]

There's a guy that's been in my room twice and said that, about looking like his sister. He leaves soon after. I guess I didn't keep playing his game properly?

 

[sahi]

Not sure what this guy was on.....lol

bravofortysix: and the bible is clear about the earth
bravofortysix: it says its flat and immovable
bravofortysix: how come theres supposedlya thousand satellites circling the earth
bravofortysix: yet theres no pictures or videos of the earth or these satellites
bravofortysix: because they dont fucking exist!

bravofortysix: yea trannies are evil i think too
bravofortysix: theyre the devil's work
bravofortysix: it was adam and even, not adam and steve

 

[SaffronBurke]

Not sure what this guy was on.....lol

bravofortysix: and the bible is clear about the earth
bravofortysix: it says its flat and immovable
bravofortysix: how come theres supposedlya thousand satellites circling the earth
bravofortysix: yet theres no pictures or videos of the earth or these satellites
bravofortysix: because they dont fucking exist!

bravofortysix: yea trannies are evil i think too
bravofortysix: theyre the devil's work
bravofortysix: it was adam and even, not adam and steve

I prefer the Adam and Eve line that I've seen a few places: The Bible says Adam and Eve, so I did them both!

 

[Ann_Sulu]

I felt so terrible realizing how so many must thought I was Jack the Ripper...while wearing fishnets...and dat cleavage...and silky magician gloves...totally not close enough to Zantanna. My deepest apologies!

 

[SaffronBurke]

"When's your show"

Considering we are on Streamate, a private-based site, it's whenever you click that lovely button that takes me private, my friend!

 

[Rebel_Wood]

I'm constantly asked if I let/love it if guys cum all over my glasses....I truly didn't know that was a thing until I joined MFC.
My answer is always the same 'These glasses are expensive, I don't want them covered in yuck' haha

 

[WickedTouch]

... crazy by name and maybe crazy by nature too?

 

[CrazyCatLady]

I'm constantly asked if I let/love it if guys cum all over my glasses....I truly didn't know that was a thing until I joined MFC.
My answer is always the same 'These glasses are expensive, I don't want them covered in yuck' haha

Yes. Ugh. All the time. My response "be a gentleman in my room...but just for fun...hell no...do you know how hard it is to clean glasses?".

 

[Rebel_Wood]

Yes. Ugh. All the time. My response "be a gentleman in my room...but just for fun...hell no...do you know how hard it is to clean glasses?".

Hahahaits all fun and games until someone has to clean spooge out of the crevices of their glasses...

 

[WickedTouch]

I'm constantly asked if I let/love it if guys cum all over my glasses....I truly didn't know that was a thing until I joined MFC.
My answer is always the same 'These glasses are expensive, I don't want them covered in yuck' haha

Ah, but that wouldn't be a problem if you had glasses like Elton's

 

[Rebel_Wood]

Ah, but that wouldn't be a problem if you had glasses like Elton's

View attachment 59879

Would be top model with those spectacles!

 

[innocent]

The classic "anal pls" while fucking my ass.....

 

[ComicOzzie]

OK, this is just pathetic...

alexmporreca: Can we please please skype
alexmporreca: I didn't want to not play with you today
alexmporreca: Please can we skype I want u so bad
alexmporreca: Pleaseeeeee
alexmporreca: I am so horny for u
alexmporreca: Please can we skype
alexmporreca: My cock is so so hard I want u so bad please please please can we skype

 

[JerryBoBerry]

I think we have a winner for the member with the most 'Favorite Models' listed on their profile.

http://profiles.myfreecams.com/smileSEXYlady

 

[ComicOzzie]

Go away, troll...

ButtPliers:would you rather put 11 pounds of skittles up your ass every halloween or forget how to read?

 

[JerryBoBerry]

I think we have a winner for the member with the most 'Favorite Models' listed on their profile.

http://profiles.myfreecams.com/smileSEXYlady

I was bored. Imported that list into my text editor and replaced all the spaces with newlines. It has the line number showing for each name that way. He has 4865 models as his Favorite model.