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Your friends say the weirdest shit
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My friend: Politics is basically deciding if you like shit or shit with corn in it.
Me: I like corn
My friend: Well I dont, and thats why Im voting for the other guy.
Me: I like corn
My friend: Well I dont, and thats why Im voting for the other guy.
2. Friend's mother asked what powers I would like to have out of the X-men characters randomly one day. My response was none, because they aren't real and she said they are not? That fucking mind control guy at the bar lied to me, my husband is gonna be pissed.
Not a friend but a funny dumb question was posed on MFC today
Do you do anal in the ass? lmao you sir are a moron.
Do you do anal in the ass? lmao you sir are a moron.
Translation;
Being Fucked in the butt, and having things Up there, are two different sensations. For example sometimes it's nice just to have a butt-plug in, rather than stroking your ass.
Being Fucked in the butt, and having things Up there, are two different sensations. For example sometimes it's nice just to have a butt-plug in, rather than stroking your ass.
my friend on the phone: "damn it i cant seem to get my cam working.. ive been working on it for days now and the guy from next door doesnt get it as well...
me: are you sure you plugged it in before starting to stress?
friend: big silence...
friend: jesus christ "
me: are you sure you plugged it in before starting to stress?
friend: big silence...
friend: jesus christ "
Friend: While I prefer a conservative form of government myself, I have to admit I like the way Obama talks. He's like a younger less amazing Morgan Freeman.
Me: ... dude you are REALLY fucking high right now aren't you?
Friend: How the fuck did you know???
:roll: :lol:
Me: ... dude you are REALLY fucking high right now aren't you?
Friend: How the fuck did you know???
:roll: :lol:
my guess was they were just joking by quoting someones tweet from the tv show Tosh.0 and so its not too weird to me.
"I always get the short stick" -Roommate
"You should be used to having a short stick by your age." -me
I think I make about 10 penis jokes a day, even if I don't share them all.
"You should be used to having a short stick by your age." -me
I think I make about 10 penis jokes a day, even if I don't share them all.
- May 8, 2010
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I was having a drink on Halloween with a girlfriend who was complaining about the lack of romance in her sex life, and how she preferred older lovers than lovers closer to her own age group (mid twenties, early 30s) and this brilliant sentence emerged:
"I blame the internet and the movies! The 80s and 90s radically changed how the sexes in those age groups approach intimacy. Womenfolk's sex fantasies play like elaborately plotted Romantic Comedies, and men's sex fantasies have been shaped by whatever google happened to produce for the query: anal fist bat"
"I blame the internet and the movies! The 80s and 90s radically changed how the sexes in those age groups approach intimacy. Womenfolk's sex fantasies play like elaborately plotted Romantic Comedies, and men's sex fantasies have been shaped by whatever google happened to produce for the query: anal fist bat"
In a response to your friend: Most if not all romantic comedies involve a douchebag trying to convince a girl that shes dating a bigger douchebag by breaking laws of stalking, fraud, breaking and entering and simply lying to the girl in hopes that she will instead want to choose to date him instead where every one gets hurt. While anal fist bats only hurt the ass they're going into. Thank you.
The point was not whether or not Hollywood romantic comedies are good or bad. Besides, there's a little douchebag in all of us, and that's part of the appeal of romantic comedies. I had sex before watching my first porn movie and I can totally see where Lemon's friend is coming from.SweepTheLeg said:
I suppose i should have ha ha'd or lol JKed at the end of my post because I wasn't being serious. but thank you none the less for pointing it out to me.
- May 8, 2010
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Bahahaha, even in the absence of an "lol" I presumed you weren't making an argument for how romantic comedies are more detrimental to society then anal fist batting. I personally feel dirtier after watching a Katherine Heigl or Jennifer Lopez Rom-Com than I do watching Japanese tentacle rape porn
LOL
LOL
LadyLuna
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- Mar 8, 2010
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LovelyLemon said:Bahahaha, even in the absence of an "lol" I presumed you weren't making an argument for how romantic comedies are more detrimental to society then anal fist batting. I personally feel dirtier after watching a Katherine Heigl or Jennifer Lopez Rom-Com than I do watching Japanese tentacle rape porn
LOL
Dirtier? or hornier?
Very different nuances.
SatanJonez
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- Mar 3, 2010
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Reanimating a dead thread.
Me: And yesss, Bane really freaked when the vet put the thermometer up his pooper, but other than that everyone's healthy
Friend: Well...........I'd jump if someone stuck something up my ass too.
Me: Yeaahhhh
Friend: So would you if it was uninvited. lol
Me: True
Friend: that just gave me a weird thought
Friend: Imagine life if sticking a finger up someone's ass was the equivalent of a handshake.
Me: I bet that's what hell is
Me: Normal, every day life, but a hand shake is anal fisting
Me: And yesss, Bane really freaked when the vet put the thermometer up his pooper, but other than that everyone's healthy
Friend: Well...........I'd jump if someone stuck something up my ass too.
Me: Yeaahhhh
Friend: So would you if it was uninvited. lol
Me: True
Friend: that just gave me a weird thought
Friend: Imagine life if sticking a finger up someone's ass was the equivalent of a handshake.
Me: I bet that's what hell is
Me: Normal, every day life, but a hand shake is anal fisting
Ariel_Moon
Cam Model
I know this is a bit self obsessed as I'm just going to write something that *I* said...but I don't remember saying it. Over the weekend my (non camgirl) friends and I were out drinking, and my friend jokingly told me I had no shame. I, a little worse for wear, apparently said:
"Excuse me, I have standards and moralistic views. For example, I would never kiss or sleep with someones boyfriend. I mean, I would get naked on cam in front of someones boyfriend. BUT ONLY FOR MONEY. And I would never, ever, ever double fist myself."
My friends found it hilarious. I really barely remember saying it. I was on public transport too. I really don't have shame.
"Excuse me, I have standards and moralistic views. For example, I would never kiss or sleep with someones boyfriend. I mean, I would get naked on cam in front of someones boyfriend. BUT ONLY FOR MONEY. And I would never, ever, ever double fist myself."
My friends found it hilarious. I really barely remember saying it. I was on public transport too. I really don't have shame.
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