First let me just say thank you for all the congratulations
Im very excited about it despite family issues. To be celebrated for sure
Let me first say as far as my father goes I do have to rule him out. He has already lived beyond the first 6 month time he got originally by 2 months but the cancer is starting to take hold. He is home and bed bound now and other issues I dont wanna mention. Basically this is it for him. For those who have seen the final stages of Cancer he is in the steps toward the end. Thank you though again for the suggestions of how to honor him.
The wedding isnt going to be until the fall, and were doing it on top of a mountain so if he is around he wont be able to see it as no internet there. Plus my parents dont have internet anyway. So many hospital bills saw to that. We are going to have it videotaped as much of our family wont be able to attend. So they will still be able to see it and my dress and all. Plus pictures too. I brought it up to the fiance after seeing your post Rose and he loved the idea.
It also means no walk down the aisle or anything which im okay with. Youre right Nordling I could always have a family friend or maybe my brother even walk me if it changes, or walk myself. Kunra that would be hilarious though to just have you walk in and out without a word lol. My fiance would never go for it, but i would crack up for sure!
If we have a reception it will be where most our family is so a picture in a chair reserved for him will be present. Thank you Luna for the idea. I love it. And Sweetie Batman he will for sure be mentioned in the speeches. Plus Luna i will ask my mom to talk to him to see if he wants to write down anything before hand. I like that as well if he's up to it, and wants to of course. It can be read then. They dont have a video camera so nothing taped, but it would be a nice sentiment for sure. Maybe i can talk my sister into letting them use theirs. If not pictures honoring him in a slide show is an awesome idea Red. Especially if he is able to write a speech or something to be read during.
As far as setting up a fund to go see him as you know you're not allowed Chip Ins or anything. Even just having my profile set up for Payoneer donations to it isnt allowed. Or even just the info I have one and can take them. So im not really sure how to do that even. Other than maybe have it advertised as a room topic thats what all tips all going towards im at a loss for it.
Oh yes Tasha my mother is just awful. But you are right an it is OUR wedding. She had hers and this one is MINE. I just think about what she did before and cringe lol. For my sisters wedding she got the whole Catholic church deal so she felt like she had raised her "right" so she picked on other things like how SHE would look that day. No joke. She made a huge deal out of it to the point of having her dress custom made, and going on about how she wouldnt have time to take me to get my hair done that day (I WAS THE MAID OF HONOR !) Cause she had to go get hers done instead. It was ridiculous what she put my sister through. On top of it on the day she made me late to my sisters house as she was driving me which put everything behind. She didnt even say sorry. For my brothers wedding the bride was no Catholic so she made that the big deal. It wasnt in her church and she commented a few times right in front of the bride how shes so happy for them but wishes it was done "right" in the eyes of God. It was in a church mind you but not Catholic. I finally had to pull her aside and tell her to shut the fuck up about it. She was making everyone uncomfortable, and technically its supposed to go by the brides religion not the mother of the groom lol. She just blew me off saying she didnt see anything wrong with what she said anytime and again never apologized to any one. My fiances opinion on it he will let me handle my family how i want to, and he will deal with his. Hes already talked to his mom and shes made comments already to him he had to shut down lol. Ugh parents.
Thats one of the reasons why we chose to have it where we are and not where our families are. Im not gonna deal with or put up with any of that. My mom will not travel here so she cant say a thing lol. And i have no issue with standing up to her and telling her off if she tries her religious stuff on me. Im the only one in my family who will. They can come to a reception if we have one but the wedding is just me and him on a mountain. Im okay with that and were excited just as much as we would be if it was big with everyone around us. Thats really all that matters to us.
Luna your last part cracked me up about thinking all weddings were the same lol. Ive been to several cookie cutter weddings and it just never appealed to me. I never wanted any of that stuff. Were not having a cake even. Im making the flowers myself, doing my own hair, etc. I have my tiara picked out on Amazon and it's $20. Im wearing combat like boots that Ive wishlisted since im gonna be trekking up a mountain the day of even. No heels for me. I have a Cricut on my wishlist for making our invitations, announcements, and thank you cards too. Our rings even are only $100 total and picked out. It will be very affordable and small. Im hoping i get some amazon gift cards in the next couple months at work so i can get the stuff lol. Fingers crossed.
I know my mom has certainly been planning my wedding since i was born, but i figure she got the church thing she wanted already so this one is all me. And we do not have the money to have 2 lol. All of this would be twice as much considering it would be in Chicago and mark ups there. Yikes. Even just the venues alone there are ridiculous. I understand wanting it to be for the family and not the couple, but i just dont see it that way. We decided it was for us alone. Our families basically dont deserve it to be about them. Maybe if they did we would see it differently, but as it stands our families are wont be contributed a penny to any of it, and have in no way supported us for years. Everything we have is despite them, not because of.
Anyway enough rambling ill let you all reply now lol.
:violin:
