What do you do when....

[Jessi]

Have you ever thought that maybe the model didn't find that person as annoying as you did? .

Hornygods,

You started out as a really helpful and generous member, who I liked having around. But I banned you because your behaviour began making me and others feel seriously uncomfortable. I told you the what/why many times. You also couldn't seem to be in my chat without attacking one of my regulars. You made it hard for me to do my job and enjoy it. Everyone I spoke to about it (because it was stressing me out) kept saying I should ban you, but I didn't for a long time because I felt guilty.

That regular (who only stops by occasionally now) can be harsh, but I decide where the line is drawn and I'll put my foot down when I feel it necessary to do so. I am capable of gauging what's acceptable or not in my chatroom. My past few payouts have been my highest yet, so clearly I know SOMETHING about how to run things. And no, not all that is coming from one person, I'm not dependent on them as you seem to think. I enjoy camming again, for the most part my room has a positive vibe and I like the regular crowd. Its been largely drama-free since.

I don't feel obligated to run my room/ban people to suit the whims of any particular member, regardless of how much they have spent on me in the past. I don't owe it to you to ban someone I like just because you don't. Its not a democracy.

 

[AllisonWilder]

Hornygods, why don't you just tell us the answer you're looking for so we can all chime in with what you want to hear and we can be done with this? I gave you an answer that any model here would see as reasonable and you immediately shot it down.

We don't know who you're talking about specifically since you say that it's not about any one model, but there are many reasons why a model would do this and nobody but that model will ever know. Maybe she wants to run everyone off and start fresh with new people? Maybe she didn't like her old regulars? Maybe she doesn't see what's happening as a bad thing? Maybe the 'asshole' member who tips her well and often (by your own admission) is better than a room full of silent, tokenless lurkers.

 

[bob]

Out of interest, here's a question though: is there any point where the ambiguous 'big-tipper' can change your minds? If it wasn't 5k tokens/day, but rather - 20k tokens/day, would that influence the decision?

i've got a couple of serious comments, but this reminded me of what has always seem a rather poignant commentary on the "battle of the sexes".....it's attributed to oscar wilde, who had been invited to a party of english muckety mucks.....one attractive socialite agree that she'd have sex with almost any guy for a million pounds

"how about 50?" mr. wilde asks....to which the woman becomes offended and tells him she's not a whore

"we already determined what you are, madam....now we're just haggling over the price" :whistle:

but for much the same reason....albeit with a kinder choice of words, and a different attitude.....you asked for a "reason", hg....i've read the whole thread.....there are as many reasons as their are models....if you're looking for the middle of the bell curve....it seems to lie somewhere between making a mistake and finding a solution...and that depends on individual personalities more than anything

even when this biz is "perfect" for a member, it can only last as long as he feels comfortable in the room.....exactly the same as it is for the woman on the other side of the screen.....you can't expect anyone else to guarantee that sense of the perfect for you.
:twocents-02cents:

 

[ComicOzzie]

just from a premium's point of view, (MFC) for all the premium's in the room, there is an IGNORE function that you can use to ignore anything that the "asshat" says, you don't see what he is doing and you can enjoy the model without seeing the crap he is doing. You click on the persons name and when the popup window appears just click "Ignore User (ignore)" and POOF he is gone from your chat page. hope this helps any member having a problem and wanting to view a model without the hassle. :twocents-02cents:

I use this function all the time. The only downside is when the model is having a conversation with the ignored asshat, and I only hear one side of it. That can get very confusing because I don't know what it is she is responding to.

 

[ComicOzzie]

Oh, and in response to hornygod's complaints about "assholes" being allowed to stay in a model's room because they are good tippers, are they really "assholes" to everyone or just towards you?

 

[hornygods]

I haven't finished writing my response to Jessi's post, but I'll quote archives to illustrate later. Heh, I guess the other models were too busy 'defending' the model to raise this question, as expected.

 

[Evvie]

I haven't finished writing my response to Jessi's post, but I'll quote archives to illustrate later. Heh, I guess the other models were too busy 'defending' the model to raise this question, as expected.

 

[hornygods]

That's constructive of you, Evvie. Thank you.

 

[Cassidy Nicole]

I haven't finished writing my response to Jessi's post, but I'll quote archives to illustrate later. Heh, I guess the other models were too busy 'defending' the model to raise this question, as expected.

We are like a cam girl sorority here, we stick together, we "defend" each other. I am not sure what else you really expected...

 

[hornygods]

I expected mutual respect. I expected a non-clique response that didn't jump at me with various different accusations as witnessed on the latter part of page1/2 of this thread. I expected to be given the chance to respond, and not have what's essentially the race card pulled on me every other post. I expected less personal biases based on rumoured claims. I expected models to stay on topic in this thread.

Is that too much to ask for? I have no problem with someone 'defending' a model, I do have a problem when it steps towards 'attacking a member'. Do you really think hostility would not be met with equal, if not more hostility? Respect is a two-way process, I'm not going to write in a way that sugar-coats everything if I'm receiving abrasive responses.

You're not right because a lot of people agrees with you. You're right only if your reasoning is sound, which for many responses here, they aren't. I can quote/elaborate upon request, if anyone disagrees (which I'm sure there's going to be an abundance of).

 

[AmazingAshlee]

You start out with a hypothetical situation with a seemingly simple question. There is no real answer here for you except that every room and every relationship is different. If someone is out of line, to the point where the model is uncomfortable, she will ban him.... and if she doesnt... well she has to put up with him too. Have you stopped to think maybe she just has a heart and doesnt ban every guy who looks at her sideways? This shouldn't be such a big deal. Let it go. Its pretty obvious to everyone who this is about by now, and she doesn't deserve your judgment or criticism- Nor does any other model. Put yourself in her shoes: she gets naked on the internet. She shares intimate parts of her life and her body with plenty of people who are obviously "Assholes" everyday- and that's HER CHOICE. If you'd like to try to start your own "asshole free zone" member room that you can CONTROL, no one is stopping you

 

[julia_grey]

I don't understand why the expectation is that all bad member behaviour be met with a ban. I ban trolls. If you've proven yourself to be a supportive guy in the past, and things get out of line in chat, I'll probably throw out a gentle verbal reminder and be done with it. I want to move on to fun sexy times, not get caught up in some member pissing contest. If it continues, you'll probably receive a more explicit PM or MFC mail from me & I might tell you that the incident made me feel uncomfortable and suggest some behaviour modifications. Until a member refuses to respect my wishes, I don't really consider calling out freeloaders to be ban worthy behaviour.

I guess I personally feel like if you're spending time and money trying to help me accomplish my goals, I'd like to minimize the incident & then hear them out, privately. Don't assume because things aren't handled loud and clear in public that a model isn't trying to manage a situation. So much of camming is behind the scenes - including our relationships/friendships with members (maybe she keeps him around because they have a lot in common & he promotes her shows on twitter & sends her thoughtful messages when she's going through shit. maybe she knows that this particular member is somewhere on the autism spectrum and struggles with appropriate reactions - this one has happened to me).

I'd wager that a lot of these situations are more complex than members bad behaviour simply being excused because they've "bought their way out of it". I second the suggestions to place these kinds of members on ignore, and if you really want to help out, contribute to her count. Even if you think her high tipper is just waving around tokens as a means of control, it helps theoretically redistribute the power a little & would probably prevent the slew of freeloader hate comments. I don't mean you should feel bullied into tipping to prevent this situation from occurring, but if you already enjoy spending time in this model's room, helping to chip away at the count makes it feel more like a group effort and helps dissipate that kind of tension quickly, in my experience.

 

[JoleneBrody]

I haven't finished writing my response to Jessi's post, but I'll quote archives to illustrate later. Heh, I guess the other models were too busy 'defending' the model to raise this question, as expected.

Hahahahahahahaha! Best thing all morning! Thanks for making my coffee come out of my nose Evvie!

Dude, everyone has answered your question, though most did while pointing out things you didn't want to hear you still got a lot of answers.
Not really sure how people can possibly answer your question better than answering your question?
If you are looking for the mathematical calculation of the sounds that our answers make... you may have come to the wrong place.

I'm drinking coffee now so I'll chime in a bit more cuz yeah, it's fun.
You asked for proof that you are a liar and I didn't even have to leave your own thread to find it. These are all copy/past from your posts here in this thread.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't specifically directed towards anyone despite any implications that suggest so.

okee dokee then...

That's precisely what's happened to some rooms I've witnessed - they've lost almost all but the big-tipper, hence the 'dependency' remark in one of my earlier posts. For some models, I'd imagine they'd lose more from losing a great room than what they'd get from that member, even if it's less consistent.

That's sounds like a lot of experience and time in all these different rooms...

For the sake of info: I don't actually stay around in the rooms this happens in, and that's actually missing the point entirely. The thread's nothing about personal preferences.

Wait what? How could you possibly have such detailed accounts of things then? Hmmmm? ottytrain5:

That's actually a really good question, I'm glad you raised it in this rather chaotic discussion. The sad fact is, in the case that I refer to, the model had accepted his behaviour by admission. I've noted several times where she'd try to rationalize it.

There we go! So it is about one particular room that you obviously stayed around in long enough t chat with the model.

Perhaps it's true - the model may have liked him, despite knowing that they actively hamper discussion and being a dick in general (which is rather evident if you see the activity levels in the room, before any further accusations).

The room...

regardless of popularity, decisions can still be made in error. I fail to see how it's 'pathetic' to make references to even a well-liked model's room, unless I'm deliberately misconstruing something (which I'm not).

If you weren't the non-high tipping reg that was banned you would not have felt this necessary to write.

@Alison - I think you're overlooking one major thing: pretty much all former regulars have left, and the room is extremely stagnant when this 'big-tipper' is present. I'd actually consider it odd that if a member has such a negative influence on the room, they can still be 'liked' as such.

You might have well just typed "this is about one particular room that I have spent a lot of time in."
Proof given via your own contradictions. :thumbleft:

I expected mutual respect. I expected a non-clique response that didn't jump at me with various different accusations as witnessed on the latter part of page1/2 of this thread. I expected to be given the chance to respond, and not have what's essentially the race card pulled on me every other post. I expected less personal biases based on rumoured claims. I expected models to stay on topic in this thread.

Is that too much to ask for?

Yep. You really shouldn't start things open ended with such high expectations when other human beings are involved. This is a community, not a college course. It will respond to a thread the way any community would and we have no obligations to "show our work" on answers given.

You have received negative response from the forum since long before we were defending our friend. Have you ever considered the idea that maybe it's you? Maybe you really are that awkward? Getting banned for being weird isn't something all members go through, even if only a couple of times. The fact that since you first started here you have met negative responses and have fought with people and have been banned from multiple rooms just for being you... I think you can safely come to the conclusion that YOU are the issue and no one else.

 

[hornygods]

You start out with a hypothetical situation with a seemingly simple question. There is no real answer here for you except that every room and every relationship is different. If someone is out of line, to the point where the model is uncomfortable, she will ban him.... and if she doesnt... well she has to put up with him too. Have you stopped to think maybe she just has a heart and doesnt ban every guy who looks at her sideways? This shouldn't be such a big deal. Let it go. Its pretty obvious to everyone who this is about by now, and she doesn't deserve your judgment or criticism- Nor does any other model. Put yourself in her shoes: she gets naked on the internet. She shares intimate parts of her life and her body with plenty of people who are obviously "Assholes" everyday- and that's HER CHOICE. If you'd like to try to start your own "asshole free zone" member room that you can CONTROL, no one is stopping you

The answer should depend on what the member is actually doing, and how its influencing the room. If the member is only irritating to me but nobody else, you might have a point - but that's clearly not the case here, as illustrated by Los' post who references the same member. I've never said anything about controlling the room, nor that the model should ban someone at my whim - this is your interpretation of something that isn't there.

Nobody is free from judgement or criticism, regardless of whether it's a model or member. The question is whether the criticism holds any actual weight. This is an open forum, so I can't see why there should be any censorship.

@Julia - when did I say that all bad member behaviour should be met with a ban? How are you defining a 'troll'? Have you seen the conduct that I'm referring to? It's not mere 'calling out freeloaders' as you suggest, rather - it's harassment of the members who don't have the tokens to tip. There's a considerable difference between the two, but you've probably overlooked that part.

It's pretty clear already from some of the posts in this thread who I'm referring to, so I wouldn't delve any further into speculation. If you're going to discuss mental issues - that's their own responsibility, in all honesty. If it's taken out on other members in the room, which it has been and continues to be, then I fail to see how autism could be considered a good reason to keep someone in the room.

I fail to see what you're trying to suggest when you're telling me that I should contribute when I've already done so at the time. For the record, I've been a long-time regular of the room before I was banned.

 

[skiphop90]

How about if the person is a really good tipper and buys a shit load of stuff from your wishlist, but makes you feel uncomfortable through the things they say?

 

[Loslonelyboy]

You start out with a hypothetical situation with a seemingly simple question. There is no real answer here for you except that every room and every relationship is different. If someone is out of line, to the point where the model is uncomfortable, she will ban him.... and if she doesnt... well she has to put up with him too. Have you stopped to think maybe she just has a heart and doesnt ban every guy who looks at her sideways? This shouldn't be such a big deal. Let it go. Its pretty obvious to everyone who this is about by now, and she doesn't deserve your judgment or criticism- Nor does any other model. Put yourself in her shoes: she gets naked on the internet. She shares intimate parts of her life and her body with plenty of people who are obviously "Assholes" everyday- and that's HER CHOICE. If you'd like to try to start your own "asshole free zone" member room that you can CONTROL, no one is stopping you

The answer should depend on what the member is actually doing, and how its influencing the room. If the member is only irritating to me but nobody else, you might have a point - but that's clearly not the case here, as illustrated by Los' post who references the same member. I've never said anything about controlling the room, nor that the model should ban someone at my whim - this is your interpretation of something that isn't there.

Nobody is free from judgement or criticism, regardless of whether it's a model or member. The question is whether the criticism holds any actual weight. This is an open forum, so I can't see why there should be any censorship.

@Julia - when did I say that all bad member behaviour should be met with a ban? How are you defining a 'troll'? Have you seen the conduct that I'm referring to? It's not mere 'calling out freeloaders' as you suggest, rather - it's harassment of the members who don't have the tokens to tip. There's a considerable difference between the two, but you've probably overlooked that part.

It's pretty clear already from some of the posts in this thread who I'm referring to, so I wouldn't delve any further into speculation. If you're going to discuss mental issues - that's their own responsibility, in all honesty. If it's taken out on other members in the room, which it has been and continues to be, then I fail to see how autism could be considered a good reason to keep someone in the room.

I fail to see what you're trying to suggest when you're telling me that I should contribute when I've already done so at the time. For the record, I've been a long-time regular of the room before I was banned.

Not exactly sure why you think you know "who" I was referring to, but I don't think you have any kind of right to assume anything about me. I have always gotten along with you hornygods but please don't think you KNOW me or what is going on inside of my head! :naughty:

 

[hornygods]

I haven't finished writing my response to Jessi's post, but I'll quote archives to illustrate later. Heh, I guess the other models were too busy 'defending' the model to raise this question, as expected.

Hahahahahahahaha! Best thing all morning! Thanks for making my coffee come out of my nose Evvie!

Dude, everyone has answered your question, though most did while pointing out things you didn't want to hear you still got a lot of answers.
Not really sure how people can possibly answer your question better than answering your question?
If you are looking for the mathematical calculation of the sounds that our answers make... you may have come to the wrong place.

I'm drinking coffee now so I'll chime in a bit more cuz yeah, it's fun.
You asked for proof that you are a liar and I didn't even have to leave your own thread to find it. These are all copy/past from your posts here in this thread.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't specifically directed towards anyone despite any implications that suggest so.

okee dokee then...

That's precisely what's happened to some rooms I've witnessed - they've lost almost all but the big-tipper, hence the 'dependency' remark in one of my earlier posts. For some models, I'd imagine they'd lose more from losing a great room than what they'd get from that member, even if it's less consistent.

That's sounds like a lot of experience and time in all these different rooms...

For the sake of info: I don't actually stay around in the rooms this happens in, and that's actually missing the point entirely. The thread's nothing about personal preferences.

Wait what? How could you possibly have such detailed accounts of things then? Hmmmm? ottytrain5:

That's actually a really good question, I'm glad you raised it in this rather chaotic discussion. The sad fact is, in the case that I refer to, the model had accepted his behaviour by admission. I've noted several times where she'd try to rationalize it.

There we go! So it is about one particular room that you obviously stayed around in long enough t chat with the model.

Perhaps it's true - the model may have liked him, despite knowing that they actively hamper discussion and being a dick in general (which is rather evident if you see the activity levels in the room, before any further accusations).

The room...

regardless of popularity, decisions can still be made in error. I fail to see how it's 'pathetic' to make references to even a well-liked model's room, unless I'm deliberately misconstruing something (which I'm not).

If you weren't the non-high tipping reg that was banned you would not have felt this necessary to write.

@Alison - I think you're overlooking one major thing: pretty much all former regulars have left, and the room is extremely stagnant when this 'big-tipper' is present. I'd actually consider it odd that if a member has such a negative influence on the room, they can still be 'liked' as such.

You might have well just typed "this is about one particular room that I have spent a lot of time in."
Proof given via your own contradictions. :thumbleft:

I expected mutual respect. I expected a non-clique response that didn't jump at me with various different accusations as witnessed on the latter part of page1/2 of this thread. I expected to be given the chance to respond, and not have what's essentially the race card pulled on me every other post. I expected less personal biases based on rumoured claims. I expected models to stay on topic in this thread.

Is that too much to ask for?

Yep. You really shouldn't start things open ended with such high expectations when other human beings are involved. This is a community, not a college course. It will respond to a thread the way any community would and we have no obligations to "show our work" on answers given.

You have received negative response from the forum since long before we were defending our friend. Have you ever considered the idea that maybe it's you? Maybe you really are that awkward? Getting banned for being weird isn't something all members go through, even if only a couple of times. The fact that since you first started here you have met negative responses and have fought with people and have been banned from multiple rooms just for being you... I think you can safely come to the conclusion that YOU are the issue and no one else.

@Your response to Evvie's response: ???

Pointing out things I didn't want to hear? I've responded to most of everything, pretty much - until you clarify on exactly what has been pointed out that I've so obviously missed, I'll read that as a non-answer. Perhaps if you consider not posting something evasive like 'everyone has their own reasons', 'they shouldn't need to justify it to you', etc. etc. - maybe then there'll be some discussion.

@'proof that i'm a liar' claim:

a - the original post has never been about a specific room, although the hypothetical is drawn from the experiences in one. The member-model relationship has been mirrored in many other rooms - I'm referring more to a mentality here. You've quoted that I've said some rooms that I've witnessed - which is true, that's where I drew it from, although its not about the room I'm drawing it from (although the discussion has never left that discussion and I partook in some of it later in the thread).

In the responses to Alison's posts, I did discuss a particular room, as the discussion never left that topic. I still can't see where your 'aha, you've been outed!' mentality comes from. Of course I referred to my experiences, but the thread wasn't about that originally - I can't do anything about how models interpret my posts, and thus it has progressed towards that direction.

If the community gives an inadequate answer, I'll respond accordingly. I don't treat it as a college course, I treat it as a discussion.

I know why I'm banned - I don't need you to harangue me about it. If you actually were present, you'd know what I meant by a lot of the references on this thread. You can't safely conclude why I'm banned unless you knew me better, which you clearly don't here.

For the record, I know why I'm disliked by the community here. I'm far too argumentative and my posts come across as matter-of-fact rather than opinion. I don't feel hesitant to criticize a model/member/cam-site, and I refuse to bend over backwards because a few models attack my posts, etc.

@Los - I drew it from the description of the room, which corroborates with some of the posts in the past too (especially the description of the cam-score).

EDIT - I may be wrong about that, Los. It should be fair to say that it seemed that way when I read the post.

 

[Loslonelyboy]

[/quote]@Los - I drew it from the description of the room, which corroborates with some of the posts in the past too (especially the description of the cam-score).[/quote]

Please don't draw any kind of conclusions about me sir. You don't know what or who I was referring to!

 

[AllisonWilder]

The model in question banned you for a reason. I'd suggest you just let it go, find a new model who runs her room and manages her members in a way that you are comfortable being around.

We've all answered your question. All you're going to get now are basically the same answers from different people.

You're really just beating a dead horse here, hornygods.

Sort of semi-related meme:

 

[Meoff_69]

Horny,

While I do applaud your efforts in trying to get input from the models, regarding a problem that I've seen first hand as premium member, this is where my praise...ends.

Every model that has responded in this thread has given you a broad spectrum of answers. And before you go back to the defense that you've used all too often during all of this...Yes, I've read this ENTIRE thread.

Everyone from JJ, Evvie, Allison, to Blackxrose, has given you their own interpretation as to how they feel about this subject. Yet you continue to futilely defend your actions by being argumentative. I also echo what many a model and member has already told you. That being, any answer that they give you...will not be a good enough answer for you, in your mind. What's even worse is that while you appear to be a very intelligent person, by the manner of your eloquent language and writing skills alone, I get the impression that you're hiding behind that very intelligence to justify your actions.

For the record, I was in JJ's room on the day in question. The day in which you continued to show your true colors. Everything that JJ has outed you on, is 100% accurate. So if you're looking for her to provide you with "proof" of her accusations, I think I just provided it!

And before you try jump on me for trying to be a "White Knight" to JJ or any other model, please don't waste your energy. JJ is perfectly capable of taking care of herself! And certainly doesn't need someone like me to defend her views, how she conducts herself, or how she runs her room. Nor does any other model on this forum, as well! But because I consider her, and a select group of models, as a friend to me...I could no longer sit on the sidelines and observe this folly that you've created. I felt it was time to throw my two cents into the pot.

Jessi, has flat out given you a clear and concise answer to your question. She has also provided you with the reasons as to why she has banned you. JJ has done the same. And to again echo what many others have expressed, I'm of the opinion that "individual(s)" in question, regarding the subject of this thread...is in fact, really you.

To answer your question from a premium member's point of view...I do get uncomfortable when someone drops large amounts of tokens to a model, and then starts to act like a total ass to the rest of those in the room. My remedy to a situation like this, is to use the "ignore user" feature. As to how a model reacts to the situation, my answer is a simple one. Why should you, I, or anyone else for that matter, care?! How a model conducts her room is also very simple, because it's HER CHOICE! While we as members do drop a lot of time and money in spending time with these ladies, it's not our place to judge her for how she runs her room. Remember that MFC offers a wonderful feature if you do have issues with a model or someone who is confrontational. If I may politely remind you, that feature is "Next Model" option that's below the model's screen.

For many models, this is her soul means of earning a living. It's her business! She is the president, ceo, cfo, and staff...all rolled into one. We, as customers, do have a right to give suggestions to a model. But only in a courteous and respectful way. The model, being the owner of her business, reserves the right to take those suggestions...as she pleases!

I have a personal mantra that I've created for myself, since I became cam model viewer that I've repeated and reaffirmed when I spend time with a model, or PM her. That is..."Your room, Your rules." I work hard to live up to that mantra.

Look, Horny...we all do and say some pretty dumb things from time to time. Whether it be in a chat room, or during our own everyday lives. Heck, just yesterday I was in a model's room and I inadvertently did something that was one of her biggest pet peeves. Who it was, and what I did, is not important. What IS important is that even though it was not my intention, she pointed out that because I was a regular to her room, I should have "known better." And that was it. We hung out and had a great time in her room, as always, like nothing happened! She didn't belittle or insult me. And after I apologized for my flub, I was the first person to have a laugh at myself...at my own expense. Did you catch that last part? I don't take myself so seriously. Perhaps you may wish to start doing the same, and you may see your situation with models a members move into a positive light!

In closing, I leave you with a quote from President Abraham Lincoln. One, that if you read it carefully, you may understand what everyone has been trying to tell you during this whole thread.

"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."

Have a nice day!

 

[hornygods]

The model in question banned you for a reason. I'd suggest you just let it go, find a new model who runs her room and manages her members in a way that you are comfortable being around.

We've all answered your question. All you're going to get now are basically the same answers from different people.

You're really just beating a dead horse here, hornygods.

Sort of semi-related meme:

I know the reason of why I'm banned, that's obvious - but maybe you don't. I responded to the reasons you've given me, and I'm waiting for several responses to them. As I've said, evasive non-answers aren't answers.

I'd like to know though, what do you think this reason is?

 

[AllisonWilder]

Maybe the model just isn't interested in discussing this with you any further. It seems that you'll be waiting a long time. Don't hold your breath or you'll have a real problem on your hands...

 

[julia_grey]

@Julia - when did I say that all bad member behaviour should be met with a ban? How are you defining a 'troll'? Have you seen the conduct that I'm referring to?

... you've got a regular in your room who tips well, and tips often.... but is a jerk to everyone else in the room? I'm more curious to understand the perspective of those who don't ban and/or ignore these members.

Is it really worth it? If so, why?

I was responding to the original question you posed in this thread, and most of the responses have talked about this from "to ban, or not to ban" perspective. You even pose your initial question pretty generally, specifically seeking responses from those who don't ban. I feel that there are a number of appropriate, timely responses to inappropriate member conduct - banning isn't usually my first course of action with supportive regulars. The rest of my response was illustrating why.

It's not mere 'calling out freeloaders' as you suggest, rather - it's harassment of the members who don't have the tokens to tip. There's a considerable difference between the two, but you've probably overlooked that part.

This just makes you sound like a huge dick, tbh. Was I supposed to infer that from "is a jerk to everyone else in the room"? It's not my obligation in responding to this thread to go perv on the model you initially pretended it wasn't about. I can't "overlook" information that I'm not privy too.

It's pretty clear already from some of the posts in this thread who I'm referring to, so I wouldn't delve any further into speculation. If you're going to discuss mental issues - that's their own responsibility, in all honesty. If it's taken out on other members in the room, which it has been and continues to be, then I fail to see how autism could be considered a good reason to keep someone in the room.

Yes, I did notice that while this started off as a more general discussion, you were in fact poorly disguising a complaint you had with a particular model. I think we've all gathered that. Good form! :thumbleft:

Because I haven't observed much personally, I chose to reply based only on my own experiences. Which have included calling out members privately on shitty behaviour when I had more information about a situation than I was interested in disclosing in public chat - including mental health issues. I wasn't actually using my experience to infer that the member in this case had mental health problems. It was an example I used to illustrate how members don't always have all the information about situations, and might be better off letting models decide how to handle specific conflicts/run their rooms.

I fail to see what you're trying to suggest when you're telling me that I should contribute when I've already done so at the time. For the record, I've been a long-time regular of the room before I was banned.

To summarize:

Don't assume because things aren't handled loud and clear in public that a model isn't trying to manage a situation. So much of camming is behind the scenes - including our relationships/friendships with members

I'd wager that a lot of these situations are more complex than members bad behaviour simply being excused because they've "bought their way out of it". I second the suggestions to place these kinds of members on ignore, and if you really want to help out, contribute to her count.

I did't say you didn't contribute. I guess I just don't see the point of complaining without trying to seek some type of proactive response to improve things. Obviously you're not really seeking any resolution at this point, but if someone else came to this thread with the intention of improving a similar situation, I still think being supportive or ignoring the member could be a helpful course of action. Those were my thoughts on how things might be improved from a member perspective. I still feel that ultimately this type of conflict is between a member and a model.

 

[mynameisbob84]

The biggest question to arise from this whole discussion is "WHY DOES ANY OF THIS MATTER?" :?

You got banned from Jessi's room and your arch nemesis/mortal enemy/some guy didn't. After skirting around the issue with endless hypotheticals, you actually managed to coax an answer to your question out of Jessi. Quit while you're ahead and move on. sir.

Models ban members from their rooms all the time. They obviously have their reasons. They're not going to throw money away for no reason, ya know? Once banned, you're kinda left with the choice of respecting their decision and moving on (a.k.a not being a mentalist) or dragging things out for as long as possible, making everybody involved as uncomfortable as possible, sneaking back in their room etc. (a.k.a being a mentalist). Don't be a mentalist, yo.

Ultimately, it doesn't really matter why Jessi chose to ban you and not Lord Voldermort (or whoever this guy is). She clearly had her reasons (she even explained them to you, ya know?). Chill. Winston. Chill :?

 

[JoleneBrody]

If the community gives an inadequate answer, I'll respond accordingly. I don't treat it as a college course, I treat it as a discussion.



@Los - I drew it from the description of the room, which corroborates with some of the posts in the past too (especially the description of the cam-score).

Actually this is why people don't like you. These two things. hypocrisy at it's best!
Demand "adequate" answers... da fuck is wrong with you?

And then you yourself jump to conclusions with far less info to work from.

Oh and I responded to Evvie in a thread on a discussion forum and that response was not directed at you and therefore did not require a response. I really don't give a fuck about how you interpreted me talking to Evvie, it wasn't for you. The fact that you felt a response was even necessary might also be why people don't like you.

No one agrees with you including members who know nothing of the personal drama and every one thinks yer being a butt. That usually indicates that you are wrong. You know, when no one else thinks you make sense or are right. (just in case I wasn't detailed enough for your liking.)

I'm still really proud of my last post. :-D You can't debunk it no matter how hard you try, sorry. You put your foot in your own mouth. No body would have cared if you hadn't made such a big deal about lying. It wouldn't have even been lying had you not felt the strange necessity to point out that this was not about a personal experience or particular model when in fact it was, as you later admitted.

Ya got nothing, but you'll try something and as I have nothing to do at this moment I'm excited to read it.

 

[hornygods]

Horny,

While I do applaud your efforts in trying to get input from the models, regarding a problem that I've seen first hand as premium member, this is where my praise...ends.

Every model that has responded in this thread has given you a broad spectrum of answers. And before you go back to the defense that you've used all too often during all of this...Yes, I've read this ENTIRE thread.

Everyone from JJ, Evvie, Allison, to Blackxrose, has given you their own interpretation as to how they feel about this subject. Yet you continue to futilely defend your actions by being argumentative. I also echo what many a model and member has already told you. That being, any answer that they give you...will not be a good enough answer for you, in your mind. What's even worse is that while you appear to be a very intelligent person, by the manner of your eloquent language and writing skills alone, I get the impression that you're hiding behind that very intelligence to justify your actions.

For the record, I was in JJ's room on the day in question. The day in which you continued to show your true colors. Everything that JJ has outed you on, is 100% accurate. So if you're looking for her to provide you with "proof" of her accusations, I think I just provided it!

And before you try jump on me for trying to be a "White Knight" to JJ or any other model, please don't waste your energy. JJ is perfectly capable of taking care of herself! And certainly doesn't need someone like me to defend her views, how she conducts herself, or how she runs her room. Nor does any other model on this forum, as well! But because I consider her, and a select group of models, as a friend to me...I could no longer sit on the sidelines and observe this folly that you've created. I felt it was time to throw my two cents into the pot.

Jessi, has flat out given you a clear and concise answer to your question. She has also provided you with the reasons as to why she has banned you. JJ has done the same. And to again echo what many others have expressed, I'm of the opinion that "individual(s)" in question, regarding the subject of this thread...is in fact, really you.

To answer your question from a premium member's point of view...I do get uncomfortable when someone drops large amounts of tokens to a model, and then starts to act like a total ass to the rest of those in the room. My remedy to a situation like this, is to use the "ignore user" feature. As to how a model reacts to the situation, my answer is a simple one. Why should you, I, or anyone else for that matter, care?! How a model conducts her room is also very simple, because it's HER CHOICE! While we as members do drop a lot of time and money in spending time with these ladies, it's not our place to judge her for how she runs her room. Remember that MFC offers a wonderful feature if you do have issues with a model or someone who is confrontational. If I may politely remind you, that feature is "Next Model" option that's below the model's screen.

For many models, this is her soul means of earning a living. It's her business! She is the president, ceo, cfo, and staff...all rolled into one. We, as customers, do have a right to give suggestions to a model. But only in a courteous and respectful way. The model, being the owner of her business, reserves the right to take those suggestions...as she pleases!

I have a personal mantra that I've created for myself, since I became cam model viewer that I've repeated and reaffirmed when I spend time with a model, or PM her. That is..."Your room, Your rules." I work hard to live up to that mantra.

Look, Horny...we all do and say some pretty dumb things from time to time. Whether it be in a chat room, or during our own everyday lives. Heck, just yesterday I was in a model's room and I inadvertently did something that was one of her biggest pet peeves. Who it was, and what I did, is not important. What IS important is that even though it was not my intention, she pointed out that because I was a regular to her room, I should have "known better." And that was it. We hung out and had a great time in her room, as always, like nothing happened! She didn't belittle or insult me. And after I apologized for my flub, I was the first person to have a laugh at myself...at my own expense. Did you catch that last part? I don't take myself so seriously. Perhaps you may wish to start doing the same, and you may see your situation with models a members move into a positive light!

In closing, I leave you with a quote from President Abraham Lincoln. One, that if you read it carefully, you may understand what everyone has been trying to tell you during this whole thread.

"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."

Have a nice day!

I've received several great responses - I don't deny that. Many others aren't applicable, or are irrelevant (e.g. 'you shouldn't tell a model to adjust' when there were nothing that said I would).

@'futilely defend your actions by being argumentative.' Uh, that's the nature of discussion. If I disagree, of course I'm going to post a rebuttal - that's a given. If the answers given are inadequate, then they're inadequate - regardless of the 'arrogant member' card the community seems to like playing here. If you think there's an answer there that was adequate, it is your responsibility to present them for discussion. It's not 'the answer isn't good enough in your mind', rather, it's 'the answer is not logically sound'.

As I've said in my response to JJ earlier - I made several rookie mistakes back in the day. There is no doubt that I did stupid things in the past, but I'd like to think that I've learnt from a lot of it.

As for proof of accusations - they can be shown via archives, not a story from yourself. For the record, she was speculating on why I was banned from a room different from her own, so this 'I was present' story doesn't really help your cause.

As for Jessi's response - I have yet to write a full reply, as she's the only one who knows the complete backstory that dates back through several months. She does omit several things, all from her own perspective - I think there might be something to be learnt if we shared perspectives from both sides of the coin.

The reason that I care for the model reacts to the 'asshat' in question is the simple fact that it takes away from the experience within the room. As a long-time regular, that's more than a simple matter of pressing 'next model'. It's a choice between accepting that someone's going to always bother the entire room with their nonsense (including frequent jibes at others), and accepting that I'll have to leave the room entirely. I do think whether a member should care flips around slightly if it's a fight between regulars, which has been the case in the room that I referenced so many times already in this thread.

I do not undermine the fact that cam-modelling is a big role in a cam-model's life. I respect the independence that the girls have - it's quite amazing how much many girls can accomplish. Of course, I never suggest that I should control the room, only passing occasional suggestions. Sometimes, they're not taken as a courteous gesture - it's taken as abrasive criticism, though.

Of course, my conduct on MFC has changed quite a lot throughout the past month, for which I'd like to think is for the better.

 

[JoleneBrody]

Obviously you are not going to see that you are in fact the member that makes people feel uncomfortable where ever he goes. If you were aware of this you wouldn't be that member anymore.
You referenced making mistakes in the past, you've been informed that you still behave badly yet keep saying that was in the past. I don't think you realize how much most of us models get around in the world of perving while we aren't on cam.

Take it, learn from it but you must first accept it.

 

[hornygods]

If the community gives an inadequate answer, I'll respond accordingly. I don't treat it as a college course, I treat it as a discussion.



@Los - I drew it from the description of the room, which corroborates with some of the posts in the past too (especially the description of the cam-score).

Actually this is why people don't like you. These two things. hypocrisy at it's best!
Demand "adequate" answers... da fuck is wrong with you?

And then you yourself jump to conclusions with far less info to work from.

Oh and I responded to Evvie in a thread on a discussion forum and that response was not directed at you and therefore did not require a response. I really don't give a fuck about how you interpreted me talking to Evvie, it wasn't for you. The fact that you felt a response was even necessary might also be why people don't like you.

No one agrees with you including members who know nothing of the personal drama and every one thinks yer being a butt. That usually indicates that you are wrong. You know, when no one else thinks you make sense or are right. (just in case I wasn't detailed enough for your liking.)

I'm still really proud of my last post. :-D You can't debunk it no matter how hard you try, sorry. You put your foot in your own mouth. No body would have cared if you hadn't made such a big deal about lying. It wouldn't have even been lying had you not felt the strange necessity to point out that this was not about a personal experience or particular model when in fact it was, as you later admitted.

Ya got nothing, but you'll try something and as I have nothing to do at this moment I'm excited to read it.

Adequate answers: reasoning that supports the claims made. Inadequate answers: anything evasive, or misrepresentative of the situation or claim I make. There's a slight difference between interpreting whether I'm referring to the same member, and interpreting what conduct actually occurred within a room. Do you not recognize this difference?

If you've made a response about me, implicitly or explicitly, it should warrant a response from me. If I made a gif that mocked you, would it not be fair for you to respond to it?

My lack of popularity doesn't make me the 'bad guy'. People disagreeing with me is rather normal, especially if it's weaved with misinformation throughout the thread - but no, correcting misinformation is considered being argumentative. Why shouldn't I think I'm right - surely you think you're right too? What relevance does that have to whether I actually am?

Right, ignoring my response to you is the right way to go about it. Please read where it says (paraphrased) 'drew from the room, but wasn't about the room'. I've even told you why the quotes have only illustrated the former. The thread changed directions quickly - I partook in some of the discussion that -was- about a particular room experience. I don't see how that makes me a liar, but apparently that matters to you.

If you think I've got nothing, then what are these responses then?

@your newer post - where have I behaved badly recently, except on the forums? I'm talking about within the last month here. I -made- people uncomfortable, and I'm awfully aware of that - but that doesn't change the fact that there was an asshat high-tipper in the room who caused a commotion.

 

[Evvie]

As for Jessi's response - I have yet to write a full reply, as she's the only one who knows the complete backstory that dates back through several months. She does omit several things, all from her own perspective - I think there might be something to be learnt if we shared perspectives from both sides of the coin.

You seem to be super in love with rationalizing away everything in your path, because you got bullied in high school for being a nerd and that's your only recourse to deal with people who have better social skills than you.

So let me make this very, very clear:

Nobody gives a good fuck about you.

You seem to think you're some sad martyr that people need to understand. You seem to think that you're a tragic story of some MFC underdog who hates a model's room but can't leave because he's a "long-time" regular, even when you were banned from said room and aren't welcome there.

Absolutely nobody is saying, "well yeah, I feel that model should give a long and reasoned argument and debate over why she banned a single douche from her room." Except for you, because you can't fucking let it go.

I don't know if you have Aspergers or OCD or you just like stalking women who loathe you, but dude, just fucking let it go.

Nobody cares about your sad story of you getting banned from a model's room.

I hear stories about you all the time and none of them have been positive. If you care about any models at all, get off of MFC and leave them the fuck alone. But you don't, because it's all about you.

Jessi does not owe anyone an explanation. Neither does Jolene or any of the other models you've pissed off by being a pedantic fuck.

You are not going to save your reputation by forcing a model who banned you from her room to give a detailed explanation of every negative behavior you presented to force yourself out.

Nobody cares that you, a non-high-tipping asshole was banned, but a high-tipping asshole was not banned. Leave it the fuck alone you dumb fuck.

 

[Shaun__]

I -made- people uncomfortable, and I'm awfully aware of that - but that doesn't change the fact that there was an asshat high-tipper in the room who caused a commotion.

You seem to be saying that both you and the high-tipper made people uncomfortable. If you were going to get rid of one annoyance who would you pick as a model?