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Friendship between a model and a member

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Oh don't you know that every Colombian model has a nice flat with a view in Medellin across from a beautiful lush green park with a small stream and waterfall? They scam it up off of poor naive gringos and laugh at the end of the day with a drink or blunt in hand.
Many do, actually. When they are really succesfull they move to a house in Rio Negro.
 
We do. Or at least I do. Not to the exclusion of other models but I am fond of them and as a result very defensive towards them.
Sometimes the defense is over warranted and can appear as virtue signaling and pandering. Like our mr. truly knows Colombian models pal.
 
Sometimes the defense is over warranted and can appear as virtue signaling and pandering. Like our mr. truly knows Colombian models pal.
It's not meant to so sorry if it comes over that way. I do object to being told I'm chatting to Jorge though :giggle:
 
Sometimes the defense is over warranted and can appear as virtue signaling and pandering. Like our mr. truly knows Colombian models pal.
I try not to be that guy. Sorry if it ever comes across that way. 😅 I have three cousins who are Colombian studio models. I'm actually currently in the process of helping them go independent by buying them equipment, providing remote tech support, etc. Sometimes I ask them about the things I've read on the forum, and I try to pass on what I've learned from them. But I am self-conscious that I seem like I'm trying to be The Colombian Model Whisperer or something and should probably shut the fuck up more.

But when I told them about the "monitors read and respond to chat messages" thing they thought it was very funny.
 
This thread is gettin’ wacky. At first i thought it was silly circle jerk. But now no true scotsman fallacies.

Lol.

In the couple years I’ve been here, I’ve noticed threads like these (heavy on member chatter, models not participating much) are basically chum in the water.

You almost feel like models aren’t reading / don’t care about the topic. But then about 3 pages deep, someone finally dunks on all of us and it instantly gets like 15 thumbs-ups from people that weren’t chiming in, just silently following along and waiting for the zinger to drop.

Sorry to derail. I just find it funny. :)
 
The conversation coming from models from a room that isnt theirs like in main chat or PM is very often done by monitors. As far as handling chat in their own actual room then no thats not as common but offsite contact has a decent chance of being handled by someone other than the model. I'm not saying its the majority or anything like that but if you buy 10 colombian whatsapps and all 10 of them respond to you while they aren't working then chances are high that one of those replies was written by a studio monitor.
 
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Anyway, compared to other models I do not think Colombian models deserve extra pity or understanding for what they have to deal with in chat. The economic argument does not hold for me. Cammodeling actually provides good economic opportunities. In general the cam business is well organized in Colombia and generally models have access to sufficient tools to have a certain level of success.

As far as the percieved friendship thing is concerned: I see it as a light version of the falling in love that is often posted.
 
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Anyway, compared to other models I do not think Colombian models deserve extra pity or understanding for what they have to deal with in chat. The economic argument does not hold for me. Cammodeling actually provides good economic opportunities. In general the cam business is well organized in Colombia and generally models have access to sufficient tools to have a certain level of success.

As far as the percieved friendship thing is concerned: I see it as a light version of the falling in love that is often posted.

Genuine question. Whats your expertise on "columbian cam business" again? Jerked off to lots of Colombian cammodels and vacationed there more than twice?
 
It's really weird and off-putting how hung up on "friendships" with cam models some members get. The fact that someone would feel the need to write a novella on how they maintain their friendship or make sure it's healthy or whatever kind of proves that it's neither a real friendship nor healthy. Just my two cents. I don't analyze any of my in person platonic friendships that way. Hell, I don't even analyze my romantic/sexual relationships that much, and I'm a huge overthinker when it comes to that sort of stuff.

I have a lot more respect for the guys who are like "I go to camsites because I'm horny and want to jerk off to pretty naked ladies who are doing sexy naked things in real time" or "I'm lonely and want some human interaction and I'd rather that interaction come from a person I am sexually attracted to, but I understand that this is transactional". I get that the latter one can be more embarrassing to admit to, but it shouldn't be. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with it, as long as boundaries are maintained, and I think it's much better than guys who go to camsites claiming they're there to "learn about different cultures".


tips on how to conduct a sane, positive and non-destructive friendship

1. Be a normal, sane person.
2. Realize that normal, genuine friendships are formed naturally and rarely require so much pressure or thought put into them.

But in the end, no tips or advice we post here will actually matter. A guy who wants to use camsites as a way to make "friends" or as a dating site won't come here looking for tips on how to make it healthy. They're only going to come here once they've gotten hustled hard, googled "fell in love with a cam model" or something of that sort, found ACF and then will post their story and more than likely get upset at anything we respond with. Because let's be real, most of these dudes either want confirmation bias or a place to vent or a place to humble brag, which the latter seems like the true intent of this post. They don't want actual advice or introspection.
 
misogynistic asshole

I broke up with a dude (for various reasons) who literally blurted out to me “You’ve gotta understand that I’m a MAN, so I’m superior.” 😲 And he tried to act like he “didn’t really mean it like that.” Um…how the fuck did you mean it then?
 
This makes no sense to me. Why would Colombian models have to tolerate it more?
Due to the economic climate. When you an earn (relatively) well compared to jobs in "vanilla land", you maye be forced to accept situations that those of us who live elsewhere would not need to. Y'know, paying rent, putting food on the table, maybe supporting your family financially, maybe paying for study to "get ahead" in the future. Things like that.
 
Cammodels in Colombia can actually make good money even in studios, especially compared to many other jobs out there. Many studio models hardly have to put up with the talk anyway, as the studio monitors do this for them.
Of course they can make good money compared to what they might be qualified to do outside of camming, that is kind of the point as to why they might put up with shit from guys.

The alternative is to stop camming and have no job or have to eke out a very meagre living selling fruit or arepas on the sidewalk.

All I can say is that you should not believe all the sad stories you might hear.
Mate.... not painting yourself in a positive light, empathy-wise here.
 
Genuine question. Whats your expertise on "columbian cam business" again? Jerked off to lots of Colombian cammodels and vacationed there more than twice?
Yes, that must be it. Or maybe I am indeed a studio monitor.

Alternatively: Apart from vacationing I have lived in Colombia for a short while and had interactions with people in the buisiness at several levels. An expert I am not, but I have witnessed some hardworking people taking their business serious. I have met models that could pay for education at a university they could not have easily afforded otherwise. I have heard a model speak highly of her monitor/coach, i have heard a model say that she did not like the fact she had a monitor at all. I dated a woman (not a model) that could start a small business because her business partner (a former model) had made sufficient funds to start the business. Apparently these are just the exceptions and I am ignorant about the whole situation in Colombia, obviously it is impossble to make a decent living from being a cammodel in Colombia, what was I thinking?
 
The fact that someone would feel the need to write a novella on how they maintain their friendship or make sure it's healthy or whatever kind of proves that it's neither a real friendship nor healthy. Just my two cents.
I have a lot more respect for the guys who are like "I go to camsites because I'm horny and want to jerk off to pretty naked ladies who are doing sexy naked things in real time" or "I'm lonely and want some human interaction and I'd rather that interaction come from a person I am sexually attracted to, but I understand that this is transactional". I get that the latter one can be more embarrassing to admit to, but it shouldn't be. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with it, as long as boundaries are maintained, and I think it's much better than guys who go to camsites claiming they're there to "learn about different cultures".

this this this THIS
Also, why is there always a mention of "ups and downs"? I can't think of any healthy friendship/relationship that started off with "ups and downs." Everyone argues sometime, but it makes me wonder how many bad days there are for someone to say this; it's a huge red flag to me, in cam or personal life. Even a monthly "up and down" occurrence is too much in a personal relationship, why put up with it especially when you're paying for it?

I sound like a broken record on this - and tbh, it makes me quite frustrated, because I take online friendships as seriously as offline ones - so I don't want to post too much more but to reiterate:
How can I tell the difference between a member who wants to respect my personal life but calls me a friend, vs someone who truly believes they're my friend?
How can a member tell the difference between a model who wants their fans to feel a part of a community, vs someone who truly thinks of them as a friend?
What kind of people are clicking on a thread titled "friendship between a model and a member"? It very likely is not a person who sees it as "just" a friendship. And I just don't buy that someone clicks on a room of someone they find sexually attractive, watch them do sexual acts and are OK with being platonic.


Final note, @inertvolcano I hope you're able to rebuild your self-confidence so that this isn't an issue any more. Good on you for recognising the signs and I wish you luck.
 
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