The (negative?) impact of regular big spenders in rooms

[Taxistheft]

Are you sure because you seemed to be saying you would only chip in for a coffee - anything more expensive and you wouldn't trust that the model would buy the item advertised and would instead pocket the money?

To be honest (not that anyone's ever bought me more than a "coffee" or "cocktails" from my tip lists) I'd be more likely to actually buy the expensive thing and show them proof afterwards as part of a thank you. The drinks I have never actually purchased, nor been asked to prove it/asked how my drinks were...

I've tipped for things like this. I've never actually expected them to go out and buy that thing. One time I did ,and she actually sent me a bunch of pictures the next day in New lingerie. I thought that was awesome of her. Lol. Didn't expect that

 

[Sashacurves]

I've tipped for things like this. I've never actually expected them to go out and buy that thing. One time I did ,and she actually sent me a bunch of pictures the next day in New lingerie. I thought that was awesome of her. Lol. Didn't expect that

Aw that's a nice surprise! Things like lingerie, sex toys etc I've had people purchase for me but I always have some sort of incentive for cam-related items like sending pics of me wearing or making a custom video of me using things so I count those as separate from gifts.

 

[Taxistheft]

Aw that's a nice surprise! Things like lingerie, sex toys etc I've had people purchase for me but I always have some sort of incentive for cam-related items like sending pics of me wearing or making a custom video of me using things so I count those as separate from gifts.

Yeah. Was just like 3333 tokens for new lingerie. I just tipped to thank her for the pvt. Wasn't expecting anything. Was pretty cool of her.

 

[Ozzie_]

It's interesting you mention Many Vids. I see these all the time on there "Buy me a coffee", "Bunch of flowers", "Spa day" - usually accompanied by awful stock photographs. I'd happily chip in for the coffee but I'd have no confidence that any of the more expensive items ever reached the model as anything other than cash. I'm not saying that's a bad thing but surely anyone opting for those kind of tip items does so in the expectation that the model will receive the item specified. It seems to me that there is no mechanism behind it, beyond the model going out and buying the flowers herself.

I do not know or use that site, but I always assume that if a user tips for some sort of gift, then yes, the model has to go and buy it themselves . I do not think any platform actually gives such gifts to the models when a user tips, surely tokens / money is all that passes between platform and model.

 

[AudriTwo]

and so what if the model doesn't use the money on the gift it was supposed to cover and instead uses it on other things like bills or put it in savings?

 

[Vixxen81]

and so what if the model doesn't use the money on the gift it was supposed to cover and instead uses it on other things like bills or put it in savings?

NUmerous times someone has sent me an Amazon card that I had to use for household supplies because they didn't want to tip in tokens and it was just stupidly slow that week. It happens.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

One potential reason they list those items instead of just saying "TIP ME $1000": Some people find it hard to simply pay sex workers, or they have to feel like they are morally above it, but they can do mental gymnastics to get over it by buying a "gift" rather than giving cash or paying for a service. All part of marketing the fantasy.

 

[Vixxen81]

One potential reason they list those items instead of just saying "TIP ME $1000": Some people find it hard to simply pay sex workers, or they have to feel like they are morally above it, but they can do mental gymnastics to get over it by buying a "gift" rather than giving cash or paying for a service. All part of marketing the fantasy.

The same reason Republicans wanted to keep gay marriage illegal -- "it's not taboo if we're ALLOWED to openly sex other men." LOL Yes I realize that's kind of left field but it's generally the same concept. The taboo part is mandatory for it to be enjoyable.

 

[Sashacurves]

One potential reason they list those items instead of just saying "TIP ME $1000": Some people find it hard to simply pay sex workers, or they have to feel like they are morally above it, but they can do mental gymnastics to get over it by buying a "gift" rather than giving cash or paying for a service. All part of marketing the fantasy.

I also feel like the logic is similar to what a lot of people think about giving money to homeless people. It's that attitude of making sure the person spends the money on something you deem appropriate instead of "wasting" it. Which is so ironic because when we're posting "buy me a spa day" and they're expecting us to actually go on a spa day, that is a waste in my eyes. Much rather spend my income on bills and adding to savings! Not to mention that none of these gifts are every fully paid for because when we actually buy the gift for ourselves, we have to pay tax on the gifted money so are effectively paying for 40% of the "gift" out of our own pocket!

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

Not to mention that none of these gifts are every fully paid for because when we actually buy the gift for ourselves, we have to pay tax on the gifted money so are effectively paying for 40% of the "gift" out of our own pocket!

And some platforms have an already too low, fixed price set, without considering the cut they take before we see any of it. It's not happening.

 

[misterical]

Are you sure because you seemed to be saying you would only chip in for a coffee - anything more expensive and you wouldn't trust that the model would buy the item advertised and would instead pocket the money?

To be honest (not that anyone's ever bought me more than a "coffee" or "cocktails" from my tip lists) I'd be more likely to actually buy the expensive thing and show them proof afterwards as part of a thank you. The drinks I have never actually purchased, nor been asked to prove it/asked how my drinks were...

No, that's not what I'm saying. It's not a trust issue at all. In terms of something like flowers, the whole point of sending them is to send them and the act of choosing them and sending them is the biggest part of the gift. Giving someone money to go and buy their own flowers is plain weird and lets face it, would anyone really do that? Bigger items like a mobile phone though, then that's a lot of money and I can see some big spenders getting uppity if it's not purchased. That was more the point I was making.

I've sent flowers before but direct from the florist. As a surprise. To me, that's the whole point of sending flowers.

 

[Vixxen81]

No, that's not what I'm saying. It's not a trust issue at all. In terms of something like flowers, the whole point of sending them is to send them and the act of choosing them and sending them is the biggest part of the gift. Giving someone money to go and buy their own flowers is plain weird and lets face it, would anyone really do that? Bigger items like a mobile phone though, then that's a lot of money and I can see some big spenders getting uppity if it's not purchased. That was more the point I was making.

I've sent flowers before but direct from the florist. As a surprise. To me, that's the whole point of sending flowers.

Oh I see. "Mental Health Day Fund" doesn't really go over that well, either.

 

[MarieElise]

Most professional cam models are not comfy providing their addresses for flower deliveries. For good reason.

That is just plain ridiculous that that would even be an issue

 

[misterical]

One potential reason they list those items instead of just saying "TIP ME $1000": Some people find it hard to simply pay sex workers, or they have to feel like they are morally above it, but they can do mental gymnastics to get over it by buying a "gift" rather than giving cash or paying for a service. All part of marketing the fantasy.

I can understand that. My assumption was that anyone who has $1000 to drop in one go probably is beyond the point of mental gymnastics to justify the spend but maybe not.

 

[Vixxen81]

I can understand that. My assumption was that anyone who has $1000 to drop in one go probably is beyond the point of mental gymnastics to justify the spend but maybe not.

Here's the mental gymnastics WE don't understand.

You have money.
You want to give it to the model.
Then you talk yourself out of spending the money you set aside because...because she wants it for something you don't think she'll buy, so you keep the money in your pocket knowing full well every red cent matters in the long run.

That's the gymnastics we don't get.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

She can't pay the bills with flowers.

 

[AudriTwo]

I can understand that. My assumption was that anyone who has $1000 to drop in one go probably is beyond the point of mental gymnastics to justify the spend but maybe not.

its their money. why are you questioning and judging someone on how they spend their money?
not everyone needs to justify to themselves or people who need to mind their business, especially if they can afford it.

 

[Danigirl]

its their money. why are you questioning and judging someone on how they spend their money?
not everyone needs to justify to themselves or people who need to mind their business, especially if they can afford it.

Yup -First rule I learned when I did sales (vanilla world) is to never spend someone else's money for them aka people spend money where they find value and it's not the same way I would spend it. My job was to show them value or make them perceive value and they make their own purchase decisions. I did really good with my numbers in that job.

@misterical , Your posts make it seem that you don't see value in models or at least nowhere close to the value big supporters/whales see. Maybe you're too busy feeling inadequate in your own ability to tip vs others which is why you're constantly finding issues with models, tippers, members here and judging others. Be happy that your fav models are getting paid! When I receive a tip for coffee or flowers, it's the gesture that makes me smile. Every token is appreciated from every budget especially when it doesn't come with overly needy members.

 

[Vixxen81]

Well said, Danigirl.

I came back to ask a follow up question. You pretty much summed up where I was going with it.

"How many guys don't tip us because they didn't like the outfit we picked out that day to start cam with, but the goal is to get us naked and they won't do that either?"

It's a virtual gift. A thoughtful gesture to give appreciation tips. We work so hard to get where we are. Millions of models competing against themselves and battling other rooms breaking rules left and right and we have guys deciding whether or not we get to eat or have a fun night out because of their own egos? I'd rather have one lone whale than one thousand guys who think they can decide those things for me.

 

[Vixxen81]

Just did some quick math on site

30805 followers
5 cents per token
50 tokens for $6 per user

If all of my followers were still active accounts (it has been 10 years) and every single one of them logged in every day to see me for even 5 minutes and tipped 50 tokens that is $77,012.50 to me in cash. I could work four days a year and be so happy. But, no it has to be this knock down dragged out fight of who is on when and what they're in the mood for and all of this other mind garbling twisted games kind of stuff. YOU CAME LOOKING FOR US. YOU FOUND US. All we did was turn the cam on and figure out who we wanted to be.

 

[misterical]

Here's the mental gymnastics WE don't understand.

You have money.
You want to give it to the model.
Then you talk yourself out of spending the money you set aside because...because she wants it for something you don't think she'll buy, so you keep the money in your pocket knowing full well every red cent matters in the long run.

That's the gymnastics we don't get.

I'm not performing mental gymnastics. I asked a question out of general interest because I've seen these kind of things on a tip menu and wondered how it all hung together and whether it ever caused any bother. It was a perfectly reasonable thing to wonder. I don't ever talk myself out of tipping a model for anything. I wasn't at any point talking about my tipping habits. It's entirely in line with this thread, because some of the bigger "items" are in the realms of the top spenders. I really don't get the hostility. I'm not saying that models shouldn't just get the money, I'm not telling tippers how they should spend their hard earned money. I'm genuinely just wondering if there is ever a disconnect between the two. I'd be very surprised if there hasn't been at some point. It was nothing more than that.

 

[Vixxen81]

I'm not performing mental gymnastics. I asked a question out of general interest because I've seen these kind of things on a tip menu and wondered how it all hung together and whether it ever caused any bother. It was a perfectly reasonable thing to wonder. I don't ever talk myself out of tipping a model for anything. I wasn't at any point talking about my tipping habits. It's entirely in line with this thread, because some of the bigger "items" are in the realms of the top spenders. I really don't get the hostility. I'm not saying that models shouldn't just get the money, I'm not telling tippers how they should spend their hard earned money. I'm genuinely just wondering if there is ever a disconnect between the two. I'd be very surprised if there hasn't been at some point. It was nothing more than that.

Not telling them how to spend their money? You were SOOOOO angry that a new whale disavowed you of what the model would accept you got pissed off enought to post here. In detail. You talked yourself out of tipping your favorite model because a new guy came along and changed the game. You got so butt hurt over it that you posted many, many comments trying to explain yourself. You got told off, comforted and told off again. I really don't think the world of camming is a good fit for you. You clearly don't understand how this works.

 

[MarieElise]

Been overinvolved from the start, and seems to be trying to normalize/ encourage that. This causes models trouble. Doesn't help us at all. Quite the opposite.

 

[yummybrownfox]

It's interesting you mention Many Vids. I see these all the time on there "Buy me a coffee", "Bunch of flowers", "Spa day" - usually accompanied by awful stock photographs. I'd happily chip in for the coffee but I'd have no confidence that any of the more expensive items ever reached the model as anything other than cash. I'm not saying that's a bad thing but surely anyone opting for those kind of tip items does so in the expectation that the model will receive the item specified. It seems to me that there is no mechanism behind it, beyond the model going out and buying the flowers herself.

Does it really matter? You really gotta stop overthinking this stuff, dude.

I'd rather hear about models buying the flowers for themselves (with your money that you gave her for them...so yeah, it's still you buying flowers for her)...than hear about models telling dudes their addresses to send them to.

 

[yummybrownfox]

But there will be clowns who do not who will then possibly kick up a hell of a fuss when the model doesn't have a bunch of flowers in her room next time they visit, because that's just the way they view life. Seems like a shortcut to a pain in the ass to me.

So? If a grown man is gonna act like a whiney little bitch over something sooo stupid, that's his problem. Not ours.

"WhErE aRe ThOsE fLoWeRs I tIpPeD yOu FoR, bB??? YoU lIeD?!"

 

[Vixxen81]

 

[Nienna]

My friend raised her prices today. (Or , actually, her studio did).
She begged me this morning not to waste money on her. She literally asked me not to pay her.
I honestly don't know what to think.

 

[rockin_rod]

I honestly don't know what to think.

what reason did she give you when you asked why?
I would say it's your tokens to spend as you choose, but would be curious why anyone would ask you to not spend in their room......

 

[Nienna]

what reason did she give you when you asked why?

She is aware of my financial situation. She told me to save my money for my teeth. (I need a lot of dental work done and she knows I am saving for it.) We used to do a lot of long Exclusive pvts in SC where we just chatted C2C. I would show her what I bought that day, etc, stuff like that. Her rate went from 12 tkns per minute to 24. She also asks for 200 tkns to start a private show.
She is quite right, I actually can't afford it on a regular basis, but I would like to keep it up once in a while.
I want to support her as much as I can.
I don't know. The paranoid part of me is wondering if she wants rid of me and go with bigger spenders, but I really don't know.
I admit I am a little sad about it.

 

[rockin_rod]

The paranoid part of me is wondering if she wants rid of me and go with bigger spenders, but I really don't know.
I admit I am a little sad about it.

I'd think it far more likely that as she understands your situation, she's aware that the studio increasing prices puts added pressure on your finances.
Not presuming anything, but sounds like she's someone who will still welcome you visiting as and when you can afford to tip.