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Equality on the way home.

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Dec 27, 2020
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Strange situation: Yesterday, I was on my way home very late at night using a public bus. Except me (male) there was only one other person. A woman maybe 35 years. I'm 44. It so happened that we took the same stop. Walking 15 meters in front of me she was going into the same direction as I did. Normally I overtake most people because I like to walk fast when I'm alone. Not in this case because she seemed to be a fast walker too. It was dark, and not a soul in sight. Apparently we had the similar way home. After 2 minutes I got a bad feeling. You know sometimes you get feelings from others, often you are wrong but in this case I felt her discomfort quite clearly. So I stopped and waited until I couldn't see her anymore. I think a lot of people would have done so. The situation was just too obvious. Now that I write this I think maybe I should have waited already after leaving the bus to make sure she doesn't feel followed.

So here is the thing: I actually didn't like that I had to stop walking. It complicates things, and I like it simple. But in this case persisting on that would have been really egoistic. Fear lets your fantasy go crazy, I know that first hand from other things. As a male being raped is just a theoretical possibility for me. I'm not saying its not existing but it is not part of my thinking process. So I really don't know what I'm talking about here. I even don't know what I'm asking for. Maybe I had to write this to get it off my chest because I can't stop thinking about it. And I hope I didn't stir up bad feelings.
Have you had similar situations?

I guess what I really want to know is the following:

What has to change in our world that the woman doesn't have to be afraid anymore? That I don't have to stop on my way home? That I instead could have maybe even talked to her for having a nice chat on the way home?

Obviously no raping anymore. But that's not all I believe. Or is it?
 

AudriTwo

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You did the right thing waiting to let her move along a bit further. It's a good thing. I've been followed multiple times in my life deliberately, and it's scary. Last week I was walking my dogs around my block like i usually do and some dude followed me back to my apartments. It was like 2pm. I ended going straight to the leasing office while he stood in the parking lot. The leasing office people kindly let me sit inside and wait for a bit until it looked like he was gone. They dont allow residents inside anymore because of covid. It was weird and scary. I was also escorted back to my apartment by maintenance incase the guy was still lurking. I ended up being late to a telehealth appointment with my doctor and had to reschedule.

Another time I was at the grocery store and a man stood mere inches behind me in line making weird noises at me. This was super scary because people should be socially distancing. It took the cashier to yell at him to back up after I asked him multiple times loudly. The grocery store I was doesn't bag your groceries so I grabbed my items in my arms and booked it to my car. The cashier told me she was going to go slow with his order to give me some time to get out there. Which inconvenienced her and other customers because the line was long and they usually go really quick.

Keep doing the right thing by giving yourself space between women who might feel intimated and uncomfortable if you are walking the same route. I'm sorry it inconvenienced you for a few minutes. But there so many times women have to inconvenience themselves so they can be safe.

This SNL song parody is pretty accurate
 

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I'm sorry it inconvenienced you for a few minutes. But there so many times women have to inconvenience themselves so they can be safe.
That was pretty much what I was goin to say to sum this up, too.
 
I always give people a good amount of personal space anyway. But there's also another reason for this. With all of these stories we've heard about in 2020 about all of these "Karens" calling the police on Black people for nonsense - and other shitty incidents that have taken place in these recent years - now more than ever I'm trying to make sure I'm not coming across as a "threatening, suspicious-looking person in a hoodie" to people. It's gotten a little crazy to where I'm overthinking my movements in the store now.....

If I'm in the store and need to reach into my pocket or purse to get to my phone, I'm telling myself Don't reach for it too fast, because someone may think you're reaching for a gun...or stealing. :facepalm: Sounds crazy, right? I don't even keep my hands in my pockets anymore when I'm walking through a store.

You just never know the mindset of that other person who's on the same elevator as you, or that woman (who's on the same sidewalk as you) who's walking with her small child. When I make eye contact with people I'm passing by, I usually smile and say hi while keeping a good distance. And I don't think I give off a suspicious vibe to them.

Strange situation: Yesterday, I was on my way home very late at night using a public bus. Except me (male) there was only one other person. A woman maybe 35 years. I'm 44. It so happened that we took the same stop. Walking 15 meters in front of me she was going into the same direction as I did. Normally I overtake most people because I like to walk fast when I'm alone. Not in this case because she seemed to be a fast walker too. It was dark, and not a soul in sight. Apparently we had the similar way home. After 2 minutes I got a bad feeling. You know sometimes you get feelings from others, often you are wrong but in this case I felt her discomfort quite clearly. So I stopped and waited until I couldn't see her anymore. I think a lot of people would have done so. The situation was just too obvious. Now that I write this I think maybe I should have waited already after leaving the bus to make sure she doesn't feel followed.
 

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Strange situation: Yesterday, I was on my way home very late at night using a public bus. Except me (male) there was only one other person. A woman maybe 35 years. I'm 44. It so happened that we took the same stop. Walking 15 meters in front of me she was going into the same direction as I did. Normally I overtake most people because I like to walk fast when I'm alone. Not in this case because she seemed to be a fast walker too. It was dark, and not a soul in sight. Apparently we had the similar way home. After 2 minutes I got a bad feeling. You know sometimes you get feelings from others, often you are wrong but in this case I felt her discomfort quite clearly. So I stopped and waited until I couldn't see her anymore. I think a lot of people would have done so. The situation was just too obvious. Now that I write this I think maybe I should have waited already after leaving the bus to make sure she doesn't feel followed.

So here is the thing: I actually didn't like that I had to stop walking. It complicates things, and I like it simple. But in this case persisting on that would have been really egoistic. Fear lets your fantasy go crazy, I know that first hand from other things. As a male being raped is just a theoretical possibility for me. I'm not saying its not existing but it is not part of my thinking process. So I really don't know what I'm talking about here. I even don't know what I'm asking for. Maybe I had to write this to get it off my chest because I can't stop thinking about it. And I hope I didn't stir up bad feelings.
Have you had similar situations?

I guess what I really want to know is the following:

What has to change in our world that the woman doesn't have to be afraid anymore? That I don't have to stop on my way home? That I instead could have maybe even talked to her for having a nice chat on the way home?

Obviously no raping anymore. But that's not all I believe. Or is it?
No that's not all. Start with the idea in Christianity that Adam needed a companion so god created Eve from his rib. Apparently women only exist for men's needs and pleasure. Everything that stems from that is the problem.
More practically though, I think it's more than a theoretical possibility for you, as a male, to be robbed and/or beaten up. If you had a stranger, much larger than you, seeming to follow you home in the dark I'm sure you would be concerned too. Just be aware of your behavior. Nobody wants to be followed home in the dark.
 
Dec 27, 2020
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Thanks for replying!

Keep doing the right thing by giving yourself space between women who might feel intimated and uncomfortable if you are walking the same route. I'm sorry it inconvenienced you for a few minutes. But there so many times women have to inconvenience themselves so they can be safe.
Yes, I will do that again anytime, as in the moment there was no inconvenience at all. And in this particular situation my feelings are irrelevant.

The inconvenience I'm talking about came when I thought about it later. It was about the roles both of us were forced in. But of course its far more important to act with consideration of other peoples feelings.
 
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