When pets are complete assholes

[Esther_Fae]

Okay basically my cat was a complete asshole this morning. It made me wonder what other people experience when dealing with pets that just want to be as obnoxious as they can.
My story is this:
I still had 30 minutes to sleep before I had to get up and get ready for class. And my very quiet very aloof cat decided he was gonna stand right next to the edge of my side of the bed and meow at me until I woke up. (He wanted to be let out of the room) And when I wouldn't give him what he wanted because I wanted to sleep he decided to hop up onto the bed and rub on my face and meow at me some more. Basically what I was being told was that if he didn't get to be let out then I didn't get to sleep. And when I tried to push him away he bit me. So yeah....I got so irritated I got up and let him out. Which means he knows I'll give him what he wants if he just bothers me enough.
What would be cute at any other time is very very irritating when you are trying to sleep. I do not need kitty meows and cuddles(I should add that cuddles only happen when the little jerk wants something. I have way too many scars from him to ever trust his love) at ungodly hours of the morning.

So what stories do you all have of your pets being very obnoxious?

 

[RealFartNinja]

my dog decided he wanted to play at 3am in the morning while im sleeping. i assumed he just needed to go outside for a bit but after 30 minutes he just stared at me wagging his tail trying to get me to play with his rope. then when i decide to get 2 more hours of sleep he starts squeaking his toy inches from my face.

 

[ACFFAN69]

My cat is somewhat similar! She's a bit of a princess. When she wants to sit beside me or cuddle she will stand in front of where I am sitting and stare at me meowing until I pat on a spot I'd like her to jump up on. If I don't pat where I want her to sit, she will continue meowing presumably forever. It's not so bad when I'm awake, but this morning at 6:30 am she decided she wanted to lay on the bed with me. queue meowing till I patted somewhere.

Usually after jumping on the bed she'll then start meowing in my face till I give her some pets. If I fail to do so after 30 seconds she will start licking my face for a few seconds, then start meowing again, repeating this pattern ad infinity.

It's no question annoying when I'm trying to sleep but I'd be lying if I didn't also find it a little cute though.

 

[RoseGranger]

My dog knows when Mr.G and I are having sexy times. If we shut him out of the room he scratches and whines at the door until we let him in. When he's in the room he sits in the corner like a creeper. And if I'm giving Mr.G a bj he stands in a way that looks like he's either shocked or disgusted.

 

[SatanJonez]

My dog knows when Mr.G and I are having sexy times. If we shut him out of the room he scratches and whines at the door until we let him in. When he's in the room he sits in the corner like a creeper. And if I'm giving Mr.G a bj he stands in a way that looks like he's either shocked or disgusted.

Haha, my dog Bailey has a similar reaction. Whenever J & I do the sex, he will sit with his back to the bed, occasionally glancing over in total disapproval.

Our other dog Dinky has to be escorted out of the room because he doesn't even approve of J groping me let alone sex (which he will try to spend the entire time curled around my head/on my pillow whining if we don't kick him out of the room).

I have two furry little cock blocks

 

[eyeteach]

My dog knows when Mr.G and I are having sexy times. If we shut him out of the room he scratches and whines at the door until we let him in. When he's in the room he sits in the corner like a creeper. And if I'm giving Mr.G a bj he stands in a way that looks like he's either shocked or disgusted.

Tell your dog that you've seen where he sticks his snout and what you've seen him licking, then tell him to mind his own fucking bidness.

But yeah, cat's by nature are assholes.

 

[JerryBoBerry]

Seems relevant to the thread.
I've noticed several pets wait till show time then sit down on cam to put on a show themselves. :lol:

 

[MayaEden]

My cat thinks that things that I buy for him (toys, scratchy things) aren't good enough to destroy. He must chew on my umbrella light, rip my bra strap apart, steal my fluffy clothing or completely tear anything paper/plastic (like bread that comes in plastic or fucking toilet paper or even brand new chocolate croissants that came in paper wrapping that I never ever got to eat). He has been banned from my cam room because at night his favorite hobby is going into whatever tiny drawer he finds open so he can take all the socks/underwear out of it or just bring my fairy lights down.

During sexy times he simply acts like nothing is different and demands cuddles so we have to always put him out of the room. He still meows but we are really trying to get him used to the idea that meowing incessantly/annoyingly does not equal getting what he wants. I think it's working because he seems to meow less whenever we kick him out the room.

This little fucker is a cute angel when he's calm and sleepy but when his energies are recharged and he thinks it's time everyone pay attention to him, all bets are off and we have a kitty running full speed while trying to climb everything at the same time (you might even be used as a bridge or stepping stone) and he will attack your legs if you decide to walk around the house :lol: .

Oh also this asshole kept putting his poop and litter on the outside of the litter box (he didn't POOP outside, he simply threw his old poops on the floor), even when I got him a closed litter box (the ones with doors) the first time he used he still had to throw poop on the floor. Thank god he learned it now, had to clean the bathroom floor everyday xD

 

[ACFFAN69]

Oh also this asshole kept putting his poop and litter on the outside of the litter box (he didn't POOP outside, he simply threw his old poops on the floor), even when I got him a closed litter box (the ones with doors) the first time he used he still had to throw poop on the floor. Thank god he learned it now, had to clean the bathroom floor everyday xD

Mine was doing that for the first two weeks too! She just randomly stopped.
She still will stand by the litter meowing till I come scoop it up.

My theory is that she sees me pick up her poop in these little plastic bags and the logical conclusion is that I'm harvesting it for some reason. Perhaps a source of kitty energy. Her knocking it out of the box she reasons, would make it easier to pick up. She quickly realized after observing me scooping her urine up, that doing both in a single action would be far easier for me. Her meowing is a sign she is proud that she is helping the household remain safe due to her strong bowel movements.

Okay, I know I'm anthropomorphousing her actions but it's more fun that way!

 

[sahi]

The cat I'm gonna talk about isn't technically a pet. It's a male cat that comes to our house at least every other day. He's one of those moody cats. We actually have two that come to ours. The other one has an owner from what we've heard & he's really sweet & innocent. But the other one is one of those male cats who has a one-track mind when he comes into the house, straight away looking for food, & can also flip out outta nowhere. He can be sweet & friendley at times & can go for ages without flipping out, which can make me think maybe he's calmed down. But then without warning he just flips out. For e.g. take a few months ago when I'd just given him some cat nip & put my hand above his head so he can do the head-butt thing to my hand like cats do sometimes, as he'd done a little earlier. And then suddenly he just went nuts & attacked my arm like an attack dog. I'm talking grabbing my arm with both hands, claws out & biting real hard. I know he's just an animal & so maybe didn't really know what he was doing but my feelings were kinda hurt at that point, as I've always shown him nothing but warmth & affection, then he goes & does that! :crybaby: lol.

He's a pic of what the pesky little guy did.....

 

[CaramelLips]

I move to my mom's apartments, with my cat. This morning this creazy animal was pretending that hottube is his toilet... that was not nice ) and i was late to work, so mom was clean up(

 

[Amayah]

My very wonderful cat likes to ignore me all day (unless I'm on the computer of course) and wait until I'm just about to fall asleep to walk all over my stomach and my boyfriends balls. She has recently been renamed to "brick on chopsticks." I do not understand how something that weighs like 7 pounds can put double the weight into each foot. Just when I think I can't suffer any more she'll claw and bite the shit out of my feet. Doesn't matter how many covers I have on.

Here's a blurry picture of the little demon here

 

[AlanaTaylor]

My labrador, Kato, has to open the door EVERY time I'm in the bathroom. If I'm in the bath he stares at me until he jumps up and starts drinking my bathwater or eating my bubbles. If I lock the door he sits outside howling. I can go in any other room and he is fine, as soon as I'm in the bathroom he freaks out. Perverted dog.

 

[Teagan]

My labrador, Kato, has to open the door EVERY time I'm in the bathroom. If I'm in the bath he stares at me until he jumps up and starts drinking my bathwater or eating my bubbles. If I lock the door he sits outside howling. I can go in any other room and he is fine, as soon as I'm in the bathroom he freaks out. Perverted dog.

My cay does this. He refuses to let me use the bathroom in peace at any time. He knows how to open the door too so he will just let himself in if it's closed.

 

[RubyDimples]

My cat seems to enjoy bugging me every time I'm on cam and starts meowing incessantly. He tends to get irritable when his food bowl isn't filled to the rim and he starts in on me. He comes to my room and starts pacing. He will even go into the cam screen and demand all the attention. I love that cat with all my heart...but god he can be a dick...but look at this face.

 

[IndicaDesires]

My elderly cat has dementia and runs around meowing incessantly all night long. He'll usually carry a toy in his mouth and drop it at my bedroom door. When he's not keeping me awake meowing, he's snoring. I never get any sleep

 

[EmberSkyy]

My dog decided she wanted to eat my whole plate of food that I just warmed up as I was getting the mail from the mail man that has just rang my doorbell....not even a minute that I look away!

 

[Deleted member 16664]

My older dog once was looking at a plate of cookies in my hand. I could tell he wanted them so bad, but I said he couldn't. He knows better than to even think about it. Suddenly, I loose my balance, fall back on my bed, and hit my head on the wall…. and at that moment he steals a cookies off my plate and runs away! :-x

 

[Alana Cruise]

Kia photobombing and interrupting yoga on cam

 

[bud9752]

^^ I'm ready for my closeup Mr. DeMille ^^

 

[AutumnAtoms]

My english Bulldog likes to rip towels off of people after they get outta the shower. Also if he feels like he wants bath he will sit in the tub and cry like a baby till he gets what he wants. :lol: He also hates any forms of cleaning, yard people, & water hoses.

 

[Courtneypage]

My dog is completely bad, but so freaking cute...makes his "aladdin" behavior tolerable!
He is always stealing something! If its not my Skittles its something else!

Thats my Henry Waffles though

 

[justjoinedtopost]

I handle my parrot every day. He (she?) loves scritchies, and loves to sit on my shoulder as we mimic each others whistles. But once every couple of months I will reach out, and out of the clear blue, no warning whatsoever, he (she?) will lunge, clamp down, and bite the ever-loving shit out of me. Generally doesn't want to let go either, have to shake him (her?) off. After I get the wound bandaged, the complete asshole goes back in the cage for a couple of days to think about it.

 

[SaffronBurke]

I love my cats like they're my children, but they have some strong asshole tendencies.

I used to have a cat who for some reason didn't want me to masturbate. I'd be laying under the covers, going at it, nice and happy, and the fucker would come lay on my hand. Dude. Can you NOT. My current cats try to attack my hands through the blankets while I masturbate. I'm not sure which is worse.

I frequently get serenaded while I'm on cam. They'll jiggle the door while crying the most piteous of kitty cries.

The cat who lay on my hand was also the reason I got a king size bed. We had a queen at that point, which was plenty for two adults, but then we got the cat. And this furry little fucker would lay between us and stretch out, so that both of us were hanging off our edge of the bed.

Frank, one of my current cats, does not accept me being in the bathroom. I'm treated to door jiggles, crying, and a little grey arm stuck under the door and trying to reach me.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

I used to have a cat who for some reason didn't want me to masturbate. I'd be laying under the covers, going at it, nice and happy, and the fucker would come lay on my hand.

I have a strict no animals policy when I need to relieve myself. The German Shepherd gets thrown out of the room, and the birdcage gets covered.

The dog has to go because there have been a couple of times where I got out of the shower, and she let me know she was ready to take our relationship to the next level. The bird has to be covered because if I don't, he (she?) will come to the corner of the cage closest to me and study me. And I mean study. Look at the groin area, look back up at the face, look back down at the groin area... Very distracting, not to mention unnerving.